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Political Jokes

161 political jokes and hilarious political puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about political that are clean and suitable for kids and friends. We've covered all the best political science jokes.

Best Short Political Jokes

Short political jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The political humour may include short politics jokes also.

  1. If trump wins the election, I will leave the United States If Biden wins the election, I will leave the United States
    This is not a political post, I just want to travel
  2. I hate how politically correct the world is these days, you can't even say black paint You have to say
    Leroy, please paint that wall
  3. I asked my doctor when we could anticipate an end to the coronavirus epidemic He said I don't know. I'm not really into politics.
  4. If Biden is elected, I'm leaving the country If Trump is reelected, I'm leaving the country.
    This is not a political post. I just want to travel.
  5. When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body, but I'm so polite... ...I only look at the covered parts.
  6. When wearing a bikini,women reveal 90% of their body When wearing a bikini,women reveal 90% of their body....men are so polite they only look at the covered parts
  7. Hipsters I had the joy of meeting a couple of hipsters today, and they yelled at me for making fun of them. Apparently the politically correct term is "conjoined twins".
  8. If Trump wins Im leaving the country if Clinton wins Im leaving the country Not a political post, I just love to travel
  9. I love politically incorrect jokes, and here is my favourite. Benjamin Franklin was a great American President.
  10. When women wear a bikini, they expose 90% of their bodies..... Men are so polite, they only look at the covered parts.

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Political joke, When women wear a bikini, they expose 90% of their bodies.....


Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about political can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of political puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Political One Liners

Which political one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with political? I can suggest the ones about policy and party.

  1. Q : With Britain leaving EU soon, how much space will be freed up?
    A: 1 GB
  2. Bikinis reveal 95% of a woman's body. Men are so polite they only look at covered areas.
  3. How do you begin a politically incorrect joke? President Ben Franklin walks into a bar...
  4. You know why fish are so political? They are always taking debate.
  5. You know what the biggest problem with political jokes is? They get elected.
  6. You know the problem with political jokes? Sometimes they get elected.
  7. Why are spring flowers always so polite? They have good bloom-ers!
  8. Why didn't the polite coder get hired? The job required SASS
  9. What's short and to die for? A North Korean political joke.
  10. Crime does not pay… as well as politics.
  11. Genders are like political parties... There are many, but only 2 actually matter.
  12. I don't think any political ideology is inherently wrong Some are just alternative right
  13. what's a political campaign we can all get behind? gay rights
  14. What do you get when you combine tragedy and comedy? American politics.
  15. What do you call a parody when the actors are unaware it's satire? Politics.

Political Correctness Jokes

Here is a list of funny political correctness jokes and even better political correctness puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Someone called me racist for saying "black paint" Apparently the politically correct term is "Tyrone, please paint the fence".
  • Apparently saying "Black Paint" is not politically correct, The right way to say it is "Tyrone, please paint the wall"
  • People today are so politically correct. You can't even say black paint, You have to say "Leeroy, please paint my fence."
  • I hate how politically correct the world is today Instead of saying "Black paint" I now have to say "Jamal please paint"
  • Hippies. Had the pleasure to meet a couple of hippies today, and they hooted at me for making fun of them. Apparently the politically correct term was 'conjoined twins'.
  • Everything's so politically correct nowadays that you can't even say "black paint." Instead you have to say "Jamaal please paint my fence."
  • With all the politically correct agenda these days, you can't even say Black Paint! You have to say, Leroy, please paint my fence!
  • The world is so politically correct these days. You used to be able to say "black paint." Now it has to be "Jamal can you please paint my wall?"
  • I hate all the political correctness these days, I can't even say "black paint" anymore. Now I have to say "Tyrone please paint the fence."
  • The world is becoming too politically correct You can't even say black paint anymore, instead you have to say "Lamar can you please paint the fence".

Political Party Jokes

Here is a list of funny political party jokes and even better political party puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • TIL my mom isn't a member of any organized political party. You see, she's a Republican.
  • What's Donald's true political party? Whig
  • American political party symbols are spot on... Trump is the elephant in the room, and the DNC is full of jackasses!
  • I know why super hot girls aren't political... ...no matter what party wins, they still get invited to it.
  • What do you get when 2 leftists get together? 3 political parties: one Communist, one Socialist, and a third founded in an attempt to merge the first two.
  • What do you call a political convention in a Soviet state? A communist party
  • Why do political parties hate organised crime? They don't like voter competition.
  • Gender is like American political parties There are 2 that actually matter, the rest no one takes seriously.
  • I wrote a manifesto for my political party but I think it was too long so I wrote a shorter one... It's a minifesto
  • How many [not your political party] does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they are incapable of making real changes due to [thing you dislike about the opposing political party]

Recent Political Jokes

Here is a list of funny recent political jokes and even better recent political puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I recently Learned that it's politically incorrect to talk about taking part in a school shooting. Apparently the term 'School photos' is more acceptable.
  • My friend recently visited London. He said everyone was very polite, except in Greenwich. Whenever he asked someone for the time they got all mean about it.
  • Joke that has recently become popular in Russia in light of recent protests - Dad, which concentration camp are we going to?
    - Dunno, son, I'm not interested in politics.
  • In light of recent political tensions, please refrain from wishing Putin falls into a vat of concrete. That would set a very dangerous president.
  • I recently told a joke about how Democrats favor small government, and decreased taxes. It didn't go over very well. Everyone said it was politically incorrect.
  • I recently started an anarchist political group... ...but nobody who would obey the rules.
  • Guys, can we please stop with all the recent fat jokes here? It isn't polite, they have enough on their plate already.
  • There was an outbreak of food poisoning among the world leaders at the recent summit. During the food preparation, they feared what the Russians Putin May Merkel Trump.
  • I've recently asked my smart home what do he thinks about the politics But he played dumb

Political Science Jokes

Here is a list of funny political science jokes and even better political science puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I majored in Politics, Computer Science, and Dance. Now I'm stuck writing al gore Rhythms.
  • How do you get the political science grad off your lawn? Pay for the pizza
  • How do you make a small fortune after earning a degree in political science? Start with a large fortune and know when to stop.
  • The best part about getting a political science degree is you will always be able to find a job! At McDonalds
  • If political science was a real science then maybe they could find a cure for this year's electile dysfunction.
  • Science and Politics truly reflect each other One discusses states of Matter and the other, matter of States.
Political joke, Science and Politics truly reflect each other

Silly & Ridiculous Political Jokes to Spread Joy & Laughter

What funny jokes about political you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean election jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make political prank.

Recent political joke circulating in China

Three men who don't know each other sits in a prison cell. Each explains why he was arrested.
The first man said: I opposed covid testing.
The second man said: I supported covid testing.
The third man said: I administered the covid tests.

I can't believe how everybody's freaking out over that guy stealing Nancy Pelosi's podium.

He was clearly just taking a political stand.

The eclipse did two things our political leaders cannot.

It slowed global warming and gave us all something to look up to

Did you know it's now politically incorrect to say 'black paint'?

Now you have to say "Jerome can you please paint the fence".

If Biden is elected, I stay in the country

If Trump is reelected, I stay in the country.
This is not a political post, I just can't leave because coronavirus.

An old political joke from Imperial Russia (reign of Nicholas II)

A man yells in the street: "Nicholas is a m**...!". He is taken away by the police on charges of lese majeste (insulting the monarch). He tells the policemen "Please let me go, I meant another Nicholas!". The police chief replies: "Do not lie. If you said m**...', you certainly meant the Czar!"

I don't want to make a political joke

It might get elected as president of the United States

I recently met a Chinese man and his name was Kannaswami.

I asked him: "How did you ever get a name like that being a Chinese?"
He said: "Many, many years ago when I first went to USA, I was standing in line at the Political Asylums Immigration Counter. The man in front of me was a Sri Lankan Tamil r**....
The white lady at the counter looked at him and asked "What is your name?" He replied "Kannaswami".

Then she looked at me and asked "What's your name?"
I said, "Sem Ting".

If Trump wins the election, I'm leaving the country.

If Clinton wins the election, I'm leaving the country.
This isn't a political post; I just want to travel.

Roosevelt, Churchill and Stalin are taking a coffee break in Yalta...

Churchill takes out a small black notebook and starts writing something down.
"Taking notes?", Roosevelt asks.
"No," Churchill says, "I heard a new political joke about myself this morning. I collect all jokes about myself. I already have over 100 in this notebook."
"How funny," Stalin says. "I collect all jokes about myself too."
"Oh, really?" Churchill says. "So how many have you got?"
"Three prison camps so far."

Have you heard about the rising political tensions between yogurt and penicillin? One side is probiotic, and the other is antibiotic.

They're calling it a culture war.

Political correctness gone mad.

I can't even refer to my own child as my disabled son.
Apparently it's my "daughter."

Land O Lakes

Have you guys seen the new Land O Lakes butter packaging? They removed the Native American girl from their labels to be more politically correct.
Now that's the most American thing I've ever seen; remove the Indian and keep the land.

Political Correctness has gone mad...

You can't even say "Black paint" anymore, you have to say "Jamal would you please kindly help me paint my fence."

English Weather

I just read something about weather in England:
The Archbishop of Canterbury and The Royal Commission for Political Correctness announced today that the climate in the UK should no longer be referred to as _'English Weather'._
In order to no longer offend a sizable portion of the UK population, it will now be referred to as _'Muslim Weather'_ -- partly Sunni, but mostly s**...'ite.

It may not be "politically correct" to say this...

...but there are over one million U.S Senators.

These days you can't even say "blackboard" anymore.

The politically correct term is: "Jamal, get on my ship."

Why did the police chief tell his officers to show up 15 minutes early to the political demonstration?

To beat the crowds.

Trump got COVID...

Well my wife and I don't see eye to eye politically. One was happy, the other worried... you understand. So after much debate, we came to a compromise: we sent him a get well soon card that said stay positive.

With Biden declared the winner, regardless of what side of the political spectrum you're on, I think we can all safely say...

Thanks, Obama.

Joke I heard on a Russian political discussion show.

Do honest politicians exist?
Of course! But they are the most expensive!

Everything has to be politically correct nowadays..

Back in the day you could say black paint, nowadays you have to say 'Jerome, please paint the fence.'

The problem with political jokes is that oftentimes they get elected...

...And if they're bad enough, they bomb everywhere.

Black paint

Political correctness has gone to far these days. You cant even say black paint any more, you have to say "Tyrone, please will you paint my house?"

How did a Chinese guy have a Tamil name:

I recently met a Chinese man in Toronto and got to know that his name was "Kannaswami .
I asked him, "How did you ever get a name like that being a Chinese?"
He said -"Many, many years ago when I first went to Canada, I was standing in line at the Political Asylums Immigration Counter. The man in front of me was a Sri Lankan Tamil r**....
The white lady at the counter looked at him and asked "What is your name?"
He replied "Kannaswami".
Then she looked at me and asked "What's your name?"
I said, "Sem Ting".

TIL that it's not politically correct to say someone is gay...

The preferred term is "Navy enlisted personnel."

Why did moses vote for Al Gore?

Because the last time he took political orders from a Bush, his country went mucking around in the Middle East for forty years.

Apparently it's no longer politically correct to direct a joke at any racial or ethic minority, so...

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Gurkha, a Latvian, a Turk, an Aussie, two Kiwis, a German, an American, a South African, a Cypriot, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a Finn, a Dane, a Romani, a Bulgarian, a Swiss, a Greek, a Bulgarian, a Singaporean, a Norwegian, a Libyan, a Hindu, a Muslim, a Monk, an Italian, a Serb, a Russian and an Ethiopian went to a bar.
The bouncer said, "I'm sorry, you can't come in here without a Thai"

People are so political these days...

...that you can't even say black paint. Instead, you have to say, "Daniel, please paint my fence".

If Hillary wins I'm leaving the country if trump wins I'm leaving the country.

Not a political repost I'm just getting deported

What's the difference between 100,000 political jokes and a kid falling off a bike.

I still laugh every time I see a kid fall off a bike....
(For real this s**... just ain't funny anymore fellas.)

Political correctness has reached the level of absurdity

For example, we can't say brown paint. Instead we should say "please paint that wall, Jose"

Everyone's so politically correct these days.

You can't even say "black paint" anymore. You have to say "Tyrone, would you kindly paint my fence?"

If Trump wins, I'm leaving the country. If Hillary wins, I'm leaving the country.

This isn't a political joke, I just really wanna travel.

There were two men in a prison in the USSR.

One asked the other: Why are you here?
The other answers: Political reasons.
He asks another question: What political reasons?
The other prisoner answers: I am a plumber, and I got called in to the party committee to fix their sink. And they asked what was the problem and I said: "The whole system is rotten, everything must be replaced!"

I believe, if you're in Special Ed, and you're late to class...

...it's politically incorrect to say you're tardy.

A group of Soviet tourists takes express-lesson of Italian before departure.

-Write a couple of phrases in Italian - tour guide says - such as: ''How much does lemonade cost?'', ''Where is the pharmacy?''
One of the tourists asks:
-How do I say ''Please, provide me a political asylum''?
-What have you just said? - asks another tourist seriously.
-Nevermind, just wanted to know which one of you is our KGB senior for this trip.

Voting for Hillary because of her political experience is like...

Hiring h**... as a birthday magician because he made 6,000,000 people disappear.

An old soviet joke.

In a prison, two inmates are comparing notes. What did they arrest you for? asks the first. Was it a political or common crime? Of course it was political. I'm a plumber. They summoned me to the district Party committee to fix the sewage pipes. I looked and said, 'Hey, the entire system needs to be replaced.' So they gave me seven years.

"Y'know with all the civil unrest, political corruption, class divides, drug smuggling, gang wars, police brutality, gun violence, and poor education maybe building a wall to protect us from our southern neighbors isn't such a bad idea"

\- Canada

Political opinions are like d**.......

Sometimes they lean left, sometimes they lean right, and nobody likes it when your crazy uncle whips his out at Thanksgiving dinner.

I hate how politically correct we have become as a society ...

You can't even say black paint anymore. Now you have to say, "Jamal kindly paint my house?"

Why is the Z the only politically-correct letter?

Because all the other letters are not-Z's.

I just saved a ton of money on my Christmas shopping by expressing my political views on facebook.

How many political idealists does it take to change a light bulb?

None, political idealists can't change anything.

I cant stand this politically correct society much longer. I can't even order coffee anymore.

I used to go to the store and just say "I'll take my coffee black." Now I have to say "I'll take my coffee jeniqua."

What's the difference between r**... and a political advisor?

Some hicks got the president into the White House, and another Hicks got him out.

I hate how politically correct the world is becoming...

No longer am I allowed to say "black paint." Now I have to say "Tyrone can you please paint."

Political correctness has gotten so restrictive these days. Now I can't even say, "Black paint."

I have to say, "Please paint that wall, Tyrone."

Political bar joke

A liberal, conservative, and moderate walks into a bar.
The hostess says "Hi, Mitt!"

[OC] Did you hear the political interview in regards to homosexuality?

It was hard to get a straight answer.

Being politically correct s**.... I can't even say "black paint" anymore.

Now I have to say, "hey Jamal would you please go paint that fence over there?"

If Trump wins the election, I'm leaving the country.

If Biden wins, I'm leaving the country.
This isn't a political post, I just miss traveling.

Where do grammar n**... fall on the political compass?

Alt-Write

Judge

At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. Isn't it true, he bellowed, that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?
The witness stared out the window, as though he hadn't hear the question.
The prosecutor again blared, Isn't it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?
The witness still did not respond.
Finally, the judge leaned over and said, Sir, please answer the question.
Oh, the startled witness said, I thought he was talking to you.

What do PC Master Race people identify as politically?

The Alt-Tab.

Turkish Political Humor

Current Turkish gallows humour: A prisoner goes to the prison library, asks for a specific book. The guard tells him, "we don't have that book... but we do have the author." From Moshik_Temkin on Twitter

Political joke, Turkish Political Humor

jokes about political

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these political jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.