Podium Jokes
22 podium jokes and hilarious podium puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about podium that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Podium Short Jokes
Short podium jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The podium humour may include short stadium jokes also.
- I can't believe how everybody's freaking out over that guy stealing Nancy Pelosi's podium. He was clearly just taking a political stand.
- If laziness was an Olympic sport. I'd come in fourth so I wouldn't have to walk up to the podium.
- If laziness was an olympic sport... I'd do my best to come in fourth, so I didn't have to climb onto the podium.
- If laziness were an olympic discipline... ... I'd want to finish 4th so I wouldn't have to climb the medals podium...
- The spokesperson for the National organisation against impotence got up to the podium... ...And proclaimed "This will not stand!"
- I wanted to take this moment to say that I endorse podiums. Now that's a product I can stand behind.
- I'd like to take this opportunity to endorse podiums They're really a product I can stand behind!
- I'm willing to invest all my money into podiums They're really products I can stand behind.
- I just want to take this time to recommend podiums. They're truly a product I can stand behind.
- Jesus Spoke to his Followers Jesus spoke to his followers from atop a podium.
"Come forth, and win eternal life!"
John came 5th and won a toaster.
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Podium One Liners
Which podium one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with podium? I can suggest the ones about flagpole and pond.
- The guy who took Pelosi's podium faces trial next week But he won't be taking the stand
- My father sold podiums And he always stood behind his product
- I endorse podiums... That's a product I can stand behind.
- What do you call a podium that crossed the alps? A Hannibal Lectern
- The most important element of public speaking? Podium
- Which element is the top three? Podium
- I am proud to endorse podiums That's a product I can stand behind
- Today I'd like to endorse podiums Now that is a product I can get behind
- Mark Twain used to travel with a podium from his hometown. Ah yes, his Hannibal Lectern.
- Bernie Sanders is standing at the podium. Allah Akbar.
Fun-Filled Podium Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle
What funny jokes about podium you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pods jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make podium pranks.
A Jew walks into a church to see what it's all about
Before the pastor begins his sermon he exclaims: "Jews are not welcomed in this church! All Jews must leave immediately".
The Jew gets up, walks to the podium on which is standing a magnificent statue of Jesus, picks it up and says: "come on Yossle we are not welcomed here"
..Trump said "Buy american, Hire american"
Standing on an Ikea podium from *Sweden*, behind bullet proof by Saint Gobain Glass from *France*, smiling at a 4K Sony *Japanese* Video camera, speaking into a Dolby Sennheiser *German* microphone, with vigorous hand gestures giving a glimpse of a Rolex under the cuff made in *Switzerland*
he patriotically said ..*"Buy American, Hire American, Stop Immigrants".* while standing beside a *Slovenian wife*
An airline employee makes the final boarding call for a flight.
After she finished the announcement, she spots a man running down the concourse towards the gate. He runs through the boarding area, hurdles a row of empty chairs, and stops at the podium, almost out of breath.
"You just made it!" she says. "Do you have your boarding pass?"
"Oh, this isn't my flight," the man says. "I just wanted to tell you that I'm vegan."
A close friend recently died, and at the f**... I asked if I could say a word
The family agreed and as I stood as the podium, I exhaled, "Bargain".
Teary eyed the family thanked me, they knew it meant a great deal.
A man walks up to a widow at her husband's f**...
"Would you mind if I said a word about your husband?"
She nods, so he walks up to the podium and says "Plethora".
Returns to the widow and she hugs him and says, "Thank you, that means a lot."
A woman was sitting front row at her husbands f**...
A man walks up and says mind if I say a word?
She responds yes.
The man walks up to the podium and says Plethora
As he's walking back down the aisle, the woman stops him and says thanks, that means a lot
I'm horrible at funerals.
Whenever I'm at funerals for some reason no one ever likes my speeches. You see, when i go up to the podium speak about the deceased, i like to compliment their intelligence. "He knew too much" is what i usually say. Not sure why people give me the funny looks there, and I'm usually kicked out when i add, "it's a shame he had to die".
A man was at his friend's f**... and asked the wife if he could say a word.
She agreed. The man stood at the podium and said, "Plethora." As he sat back down the wife said, "Thanks, that means a lot."
