Plumbing Jokes
30 plumbing jokes and hilarious plumbing puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about plumbing that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Check out this collection of plumbing jokes - from leaky puns and apprentice jokes to tradesman gags and naughty humour about faulty tankless water heaters and carburetors. Get ready for a laugh!
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Funniest Plumbing Short Jokes
Short plumbing jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The plumbing humour may include short plumber jokes also.
- There once was a plumber named Leigh Who was plumbing his girl by the sea
She said, "stop your plumbing," "I hear someone coming!"
Said the plumber, still plumbing
"...it's me." - How is plumbing like poker? How is plumbing like poker?
You can't have a full house and a straight flush at the same time. - My wife wasn't too happy when I mentioned that our limited budget meant deciding between improving the kitchen plumbing or replacing the pool pump. Its either sink or swim.
- Plumbing is like poker Plumbing is like poker.
You can't have a full house and a straight flush. - After Rudy Giuliani held a press conference at Four Seasons Total Landscaping, he experienced chest pains. He was quickly rushed to Mount Sinai Heating & Plumbing.
- I plan to run power out to my barn. I'd like to have plumbing as well but that may just be a pipe dream.
- I used to have an unhealthy obsession with plumbing parts but, after years of therapy, I finally got it out my cistern.
- My father is a carpenter, and he was telling me about the new, state-of-the-art plumb bob that was just released... It really is next-level.
- Was driving to work this morning and saw a pluming truck with the best slogan ever. Had to share... J&S Plumbing: Because sometimes a flush is better than a full house.
- Marvel studios have just released a trailer for a new plumbing superhero and his side kick. The sidekick only has one line of dialogue in the trailer.... "I am grout!"
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Plumbing One Liners
Which plumbing one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with plumbing? I can suggest the ones about plumber pipe and plumbers do it.
- March 11 is World Plumbing Day. I'd make a dad joke about it... ...but I'm drained.
- Don't get me wrong I like my plumbing job… But sometimes I find it draining
- Want a surefire trick to break your nail-biting habit? Take up plumbing
- What's a carpenter's favorite dessert flavor? Plumb Jamb
- Maybe I'm too exciteable All it takes in indoor plumbing to get me all wet
- I used to do plumbing work but I'm all dried up So I do pruning now
- I once had a temp job at a prune processing plant It was a plumb assignment
- If bricklayers can lay bricks... Can Plumbers lay plumbs?
- What do you do when the female plumber messes up your plumbing? You Sewer
- Conor McGregor should go back to plumbing He loves taps
- Have you guys heard about the plumbing rates? They're in the toilet.
- What do you call a fruit farmer with a level head? Plumb Bob
- In the world of plumbing, it's all about your connections.
- I hate when people watch me do shoddy plumbing fixes... It's too much pressure.
- What's a Plumber's favorite fruit? A plumb, isn't it obvious lol.
Hilarious Fun Plumbing Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about plumbing you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean plunger jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make plumbing pranks.
A man lost at sea is found on an island 20 years later.
The sailors that find him are surprised to see three large buildings on the island. They ask the man why he built the buildings. "This first building is my house" he says. "I was able to set up a crude aqueduct to create some form of indoor plumbing". The sailors are impressed and ask about the second building. "This second building is my church" he says "I am a Christian and my faith is very important to me". The sailors nod in understanding and ask about the third building. "Oh, that one" the man says. "That's the church I USED to go to".
A guy's wife is stuck in a toilet.
He tries getting her out - nothing, she's still stuck, unable to get out. So guy calls the plumbing company to come to rescue. They say that they'll be there in half an hour. While waiting, the guy covers his wife's private parts with a sombrero, so she doesn't get embarrassed any further.
Half an hour later plumbers come, look at the situation and the more experienced looking one says "We'll get the lady out - no problem. As for the Mexican - I'm sorry, but we think he's beyond saving..."
A prestigious neurosurgeon calls a plumber to tend to his leaky faucet.
The problem requires an easy fix and the entire job takes less than two minutes. Before leaving, the plumber says, That will be $200.
The surgeon was astonished. He says, I will be candid with you. I am a neurosurgeon and even I don't charge $100 a minute.
The plumber says, Yeah, I know. Before I switched to plumbing, I was a neurosurgeon too."
The 4 rules of plumbing
Payday is Friday
s**... flows downhill
The boss is an a**...
Don't chew your fingernails
