JokoJokes

Plug Jokes

119 plug jokes and hilarious plug puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about plug that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Spark up the conversation with funny plug jokes. Learn the punchlines to jokes about electric plugs and pulling the plug, or find out why ear plugs are so funny. Plug in to humor about USBs and plug sockets and discover the upside of faulty technology.

Funniest Plug Short Jokes

Short plug jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The plug humour may include short clip jokes also.

  1. I have a Muslim friend with a Note 7... It only gets awkward when he shouts "Allahu Akbar" when plugging it in.
  2. What do hospitals and refrigerators have in common? If you pull the plug, the vegetables start to decompose.
  3. If I am ever in a coma on life support I want my family to unplug me... And then plug me back in. See if that works.
  4. If I'm ever on life support, I want you to pull up he plug... Then wait 10 seconds and plug it back in, maybe that'll work.
  5. I bought my mother in law a chair for her birthday... But my wife wouldn't let me plug it in.
  6. As a plumber's assistant, I'm always being ordered around... "Stop that dripping, plug that leak, for God's sake... turn off the water works!" It's not my fault, I'm just an emotional guy.
  7. I renamed my iPhone The Titanic So when I plug it in my computer it says The Titanic is syncing.
  8. I just changed my iPhone's name to "Titanic" I just changed my iPhone's name to "Titanic" and plugged it in.
    It's syncing now.
  9. My grandpa told me, "You millennials are too dependent on technology... .. so I plugged out his life support
  10. They Just Released Stephen Hawking's Last Words "1 percent battery life remaining. Please find nearest charger and plug in device"

Share These Plug Jokes With Friends




Plug One Liners

Which plug one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with plug? I can suggest the ones about paste and lamp.

  1. If I'm ever on life support, unplug me... Then plug me back in, see if that works.
  2. What is the worst response to "I love you"? "I'm still pulling the plug Grandma"
  3. If I'm ever in a coma unplug me. Then plug me back in and see if that fixes the problem.
  4. I renamed my iPod The Titanic When I plug it in, it says "The Titanic is syncing".
  5. My boss asked me to fix the plug on his lamp... I simply refused.
  6. A spark plug walks into a bar And the bartender says " don't you go starting anything"
  7. I bought my ex-girlfriend a new chair... ...but the state won't let me plug it in.
  8. Today I aggressively plugged in my phone Needless to say, it got turned on.
  9. What do you call a square peg that wonders if it could plug a round hole? Pi-curious.
  10. Why is space cold? There is no where to plug in the space heaters.
  11. My wife complained that long baths feel draining So I got her a plug.
  12. I shouldn't have plugged my iPhone into the PC at the Kitchen It's now in the sync.
  13. I like my women like I like my plug sockets Turned on and me forking them
  14. Why aren't British electrical plugs allowed to do anything? They are always grounded.
  15. Where do plugs like to shop? The outlet mall.

Pull The Plug Jokes

Here is a list of funny pull the plug jokes and even better pull the plug puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I just got in an argument with my grandpa about who's generation relies on electronics more So, I pulled the plug on him. Guess I won that argument
  • What's the difference between vegetation and vegetables? You don't have to pull the plug on vegetation.
  • So I heard Microsoft pulled the plug after their chat robot slung slurs, ripped Obama and denied the Holocaust... I guess there wasn't enough room for two Trumps in the Republican party.
  • If you were a vegetable, you'd be a cutecumber! Just kidding; if you were a vegetable, I'd pull the plug.
  • My grandfather told me my generation is too dependant on technology now-a-days. I told the doctor to pull his plug.
  • Let it be known that if I'm ever being electrocuted . . . I just want them to pull the plug on me.
  • Is your fridge running? If so, you better catch it before it pulls its plug out
  • Why did the lumberjack pull the plug? He couldn't log off.
  • Monty Python scheduled to sing National Anthem for NFL London game However, officials pulled the plug at the last minute when it was revealed the comedians would be taking a Ni.
  • I had a friend... ... who wanted to do a project about youth in Asia. Unfortunately, the government pulled the plug on it.

Pulling The Plug Jokes

Here is a list of funny pulling the plug jokes and even better pulling the plug puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • My grandpa told me to pull the plug for him... He said that devices such as T.V's use electricity whilst plugged in even when they are turned off, a phenomenon called Phantom Load .
  • Why should doctors wear surgical masks when pulling the plug on Donald Trump? So no one can see their smiles.
  • what do you do when someone enters a coma in the bathtub? Pull the plug
  • How do you discipline bratty appliances​? You pull out the plug.
  • Today was a sad day - we had to pull the plug on my granpa cause I needed the outlet for my laptop
Plug joke, Today was a sad day - we had to pull the plug on my granpa

Electric Plug Jokes

Here is a list of funny electric plug jokes and even better electric plug puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Did you hear about the auntie who plugged her electric blanket into the toaster? She kept popping out of bed
  • Did you hear about the guy who was assaulted with electrical plugs? His attackers used a two-prong strategy.
  • An Englishman went into a hardware store and asked to buy a kitchen sink. Would you like one with a plug?' asked the assistant.....'Don't tell me they've gone electric,' said the Englishman.¤
  • Let me insert my plug into your socket and we can generate some electricity.

Ear Plug Jokes

Here is a list of funny ear plug jokes and even better ear plug puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Always carry ear plugs incase an Indian taxi driver picks you up So you can stick them up your nose.
  • I've been giving the wife a lot of o**... s**... lately. When she gets bored she just puts her ear plugs in.

Spark Plug Jokes

Here is a list of funny spark plug jokes and even better spark plug puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A spark plug walks into a bar... Bartender says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."
  • Found out my mechanic dealt w**... on the side, now he's my spark plug.
Plug joke, Found out my mechanic dealt w**... on the side,

Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Plug Jokes

What funny jokes about plug you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pong jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make plug pranks.

A question for your doctor

During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, "How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in an old age home?"
"Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub."
"Oh, I understand," I said. "A normal person would use the bucket because it is bigger than the spoon or the teacup.."
"No" he said. "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?"

I just put my finger in a plug socket and got electrocuted...

It really Hertz.

In a Mental Hospital a journalist asked the Doctor

How do u determine whether to admit a patient or not?
Dr: Well, we first fill a BathTub & give a teaspoon, a glass & a bucket to the patient & ask them to empty the Bathtub....
Journalist: Oh, obviously a normal person would use the bucket because its bigger....
Dr: NO, a normal person would pull the drain plug!
Now if you would be so kind as to proceed to bed no.39

Asylum

A reporter is looking for a new story and thought an asylum for the insane would make a nice story. There, his first question is how they know who is sane and who's insane. "Well," the woman working there replied "We give everyone a teaspoon, a tablespoon and a bucket. Then we lead them to the bathroom and ask them to empty the bathtub as fast as they can". "Obviously, the sane people would use the bucket" the reporter says.
"No, the sane people would use the plug..."

"Your generation is too reliant on technology," my grandfather said to me.

"No, YOUR generation is too reliant on technology!" I said as I pulled the plug of his life support in order to further prove my point.

Your generation is too reliant on technology," said my grandpa

"No, your generation is too reliant on technology," I retorted as I pulled the plug on his life support to further prove my point.

 ^  

^Shamelessly ^stolen ^from ^a ^top ^comment ^somewhere

As soon as I plugged in my laptop, all my files became unreadable.

I guess power corrupts.

During a visit to the mental hospital....

..a visitor asks the Director what criterion defined whether or not a patient should be institutionalized.
"Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub."
"Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger."
"No." said the Director, "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?"

The Device Too Big To Fail

I Renamed my iPod The Titanic, so when I plug it in, it says, The 
Titanic is syncing.

My last days.

If I ever end up on life support unplug me. Then plug me back in again and see if that works. REBOOT me baby!

A husband and wife...

Were sitting at home when the husband suddenly said, "Honey, just so you know, I never want to be kept alive in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug."
So the wife got up, pulled the plug on the T.V. and threw out all of his beer.

The guy that invented/designed the USB plug died about a month ago.

At his f**... they lowered his coffin into the ground, then pulled it out and turned it around and put it back, then pulled it up again....

I named my phone "The Titanic...."

So when I plug it in to charge it says, "The Titanic is syncing"

TIL that if you plug your amp into a 12" instead of your 8", you get fireworks.

Whoops. Wrong sub.

Wife asked me to fix a plug for her this morning...

I refused.

The right to die

A man and his wife are sitting in the living room, and he says to her: "Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state dependent on some machine. If that ever happens, just pull the plug."
His wife gets up and unplugs the TV.

I was hanging out with my grandfather.

I was on my phone when he knocks it out of my hands and said " You rely to much on technology " red in the face with rage I scream " No YOU rely to much on technology" as I pull the plug on his life support.

Why do we let women and children off a sinking ship first?

So the men can plug the leak, sail away, and start better lives.

How to fix America?

Unplug the power cord wait 10 seconds, plug it back again. See if it works.

Everything updates these days...

PC - updating.
TV - updating.
Tablet - updating.
Phone - updating.
I am afraid to plug in the iron.

My phone charger has been exposing its inner wires to promote its agenda.

It's a shameless plug.

Did you know they were making dual-sided USB?

Now it'll only take **6** tries to plug it in.

I was recently at a mental institution and asked the director how he knew when someone needed to be admitted...

He said: "We fill up a bath tub with water and offer the person a teaspoon, a tea cup, and a bucket to empty the tub."
I said: "Oh, a normal person would chose the bucket cause it's bigger!"
He replied: "No, a normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed by the window or the door?"

A man rubs a bottle and a genie comes out,

The genie says to the man, "I will grant you one wish however, it must be within reason" The man thinks for a second and says "I want a dragon!" the genie replies "Are you mad? I said within reason!" Again the man thinks and finally speaks. "I wish for the ability to plug a USB cable in right every time." The genie thinks, then says,
What color do you want your dragon?

Man thinks he has all the power...

...but the power comes from the socket, not from the plug.

Men vacuum the same way they have s**...

They just put the plug in, make noises for 3 minutes, then collapses on the couch and thinks that the wife should only be delighted.

A man goes to an asylum and asks

How do you admit your patients? The psychiatrist says Well, we fill a bathtub full of water then give them a spoon, a cup and a bucket then we tell them to empty the bathtub . The man replies I see, so the sane person would take the bucket , and the psychiatrist replies No, the sane person will pull the drain plug. Would you like your room to have a balcony sir?

The doctor was showing the visitor around the insane asylum

,and showing him a test to decide whether people should be admitted as patients. "We fill a bathtub with water and we hand the person a teaspoon, a cup, and a pail." "Oh," says the visitor, "So the normal person will use the pail to empty the tub." The doctor replied, "No, actually, a normal person would pull the plug. So, would you like a private room?"

My family is putting an electrical plug in our elm tree.

They were going to put it in the bushes, but I convinced them that a tree-prong outlet would be better for the ground.
---------
"Tree-prong outlet" stolen from an engineer I was talking to today, but joke format is all mine.

How do you get your grandparents to stop saying your life depends on technology?

Reply, No, u. as you reach for the plug.

What do you cover for protection, plug up the rear, and finger all day?

Your phone lol (sorry really high)

Did you hear about the new store where you can plug in robotic limbs?

It's great even though they charge an arm and a leg.

If something doesn't work, unplug it and plug it back in, it fixes it every time.

Except for Grandma.

I hate watching Showtime because they are always showing commercials for their own shows.

It's just Shameless plug after Shameless plug.

Having s**... isn't as hard as you might think.

It's just plug and play.

A man joins the mob and becomes the personal assistant to the Godfather

One day he receives a text message from the boss. "I've been having problems with my wife. Please pull the plug and then call someone in to take care of the matter."
The man knows better than to question the Godfather, so he dutifully carries out the command. He shoots the boss's wife, and then calls in the clean up crew.
But a short while later, he receives another message. "s**... autocorrect. I meant wifi."

4 engineers repairing a car

*there are 4 engineers in a car but it doesn't start*
Mechanical engineer: the spark plug must be broken
Chemical engineer: there must be impurities in the gas
Electrical engineer: the contact must be broken
Computer engineer: what if we exit and enter the car another time?

A man to a psychiatrist:

How do you select who should be admitted to your facility? The psychiatrist replies: We fill a bathtub with water and give the person a spoon, a cup and a bucket. Then we ask that person to empty the bathtub. The man smiles: Ah, I understand, if you are sane you would take the bucket. The Psychiatrist replies: No, a sane guy pulls the plug. Do you want a room with or without a balcony?

The Bathtub Test

During a visit to the mental asylum, I asked the director how do you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized. Well said the director, we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub.
Oh, I understand, I said. A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup. No. said the director, A normal person would pull the plug, Do you want a bed near the window?

What do you call a b**... plug being utilized by a guy?

A manhole cover

A man and his wife was sitting in the living room

Husband:Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.
His wife got up, unplugged the TV and threw out all of his beer.

Things you can say about your computer but not your partner

I'll start,
It takes me three tries to plug in my stick

The Bathtub Test

During a visit to the mental institution, a visitor asked the Director what the criterion was which defined whether or not a patient should be institutionalized.
"Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub.
"Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup."
"No." said the Director, "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?"

THE BATHTUB TEST: During a visit to my doctors I asked him . . .

"How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in an old age home?"
"Well" he said, "We fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a tea cup and a bucket to the person and ask them to empty the bathtub"
"Oh, I understand" I said "Because a normal person would use the bucket as it's bigger then the spoon or the teacup"
"No" he said "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window or the door?"

My mother advised me not to marry an electrician

"Don't marry an electrician, he will take late night calls and plug himself into other women", my mother warned me.
"Don't marry a plumber either", she continued, "he will work on weekends and do other women's pipes".
"Don't marry a pizza boy neither. He will work on Friday nights and make other women pizzas"
And that's why I married an unemployed man!

What's the difference between a mega church pastor and a crazed marine carrying a b**... plug covered in superglue?

One wants to heal your soul for money.
The other wants to seal your hole for Gunny.

What's the difference between Ted Nugent and a vacuum cleaner?

You have to plug in the vacuum before it s**....

I renamed my iPhone "The Titanic"

Now, when I plug it in, it informs me: The Titanic is syncing.

How to help your local politician qualify for a mental asylum

A politician is visiting the local mental asylum, and asks "How do you decide whether someone should be admitted here?"
"Well," says the director, "We fill up a bath with water, then give the patient a teaspoon, a mug, and a bucket, and ask them to empty the bath as quickly as possible."
"I see," says the politician, "and if he's got any sense he'll choose the bucket."
"No," says the director, "If he's got any sense he'll pull the plug out. Would you like a room with a view?"

Plug joke, How to help your local politician qualify for a mental asylum

jokes about plug