Plot Jokes
159 plot jokes and hilarious plot puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about plot that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article explores the art of "plot jokes" which involve humorous plot scenes in movies, TV shows, and other forms of media. Learn about classic plot twists, like a character faking their own death, and how to incorporate them into your own stories. Discover how to add unexpected plot points to your story and how to create dynamic scenes that leave your audience laughing.
Funniest Plot Short Jokes
Short plot jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The plot humour may include short plan jokes also.
- I just saw my math teacher lock himself in his office with a piece of graph paper. I think he must be plotting something.
- I just watched a movie about a y=x graph The plot was a bit predictable
And a little flat
Good special f(x) though - I found out what that math teacher with graph paper from yesterday's joke was plotting.... ...weapons of math instruction.
- There's radical feminist plot to attack the postal service... They heard it was a mail dominated industry..
( Possibility OC?) - I have a story for you. A guy pours cement all over a plot of land... and then the plot thickens.
- I went to an allotment yesterday to find more soil there than the day before. Today, I went there again and found even more soil.. The plot thickens...
- It's my cake day! Here is my favorite joke: Someone's been adding soil to my garden...
...the plot thickens - For years, I've suspected my wife of adding soil to my garden and when I asked her about it, she just giggled and shrugged... The plot thickens...
- I saw my math teacher with a piece of graph paper, and a very strange look on his face yesterday I think he may be plotting something.
- I plotted all of my past relationships on a chart It had an ex axis and a why axis.
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Plot One Liners
Which plot one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with plot? I can suggest the ones about chart and scheme.
- What has 27 actors, three settings, two writers, and one plot? 671 Hallmark movies.
- As I suspected, someone has been adding soil to my garden. The plot thickens.
- I accused my wife of adding dirt to the garden. She denied it. The plot thickens.
- Some more dirt was mysteriously added to my garden last night... The plot thickens
- Proof that 9/11 wasn't a government plot: It worked.
- In the movie 'The Hunt for Red October' ... the entire story is the sub-plot.
- I accidentally put corn starch in my novel.. The plot thickened.
- I don't trust people with graph paper They're always plotting something
- I caught my neighbor putting a layer of topsoil on my allotment The plot thickened
- Never trust a mathematician with a graph. They're always plotting something.
- How do we know 9/11 wasn't a government plot? Because it worked.
- Have you heard about Marx's tomb? They say it's a Communist plot
- Some mystery person keeps adding soil to my garden. The plot thickens.
- Never trust anybody who has graph paper. They're always plotting something.
- I love spoiling the plot of The Picture of Dorian Gray Never gets old
Plot Twist Jokes
Here is a list of funny plot twist jokes and even better plot twist puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My life is like going to see a M. Night Shyamalan film....bizarre characters, lots of plot twists and I want my money back.
- I was drawing a graph for my report expecting a straight line. But I got a curve. What a plot twist
- A poem I read to my gf while proposing Roses are Red
Today is the Day
Plot Twist
I'm Gay - I'm writing a book with a huge plot twist So that you'll think:
"Oh, this is how it's gonna be"
And then it turns out to be completely different
Because I'm not actually writing a book. - Plot twist, Kylo Ren is not an only child He's a Solo child
- What dance move catches everyone by surprise? The Plot Twist!
- What do you call an unexpected wiggle on a straight graph? A plot twist.
- So what do you all think of the new House of Cards? I have to say that whole plot twist with Trump becoming the new president was quite unexpected.
- Want to hear a plot twist? Tolp.
- So I rotated my coordinate system about the Z-Axis.. Plot twist!
Cemetery Plot Jokes
Here is a list of funny cemetery plot jokes and even better cemetery plot puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I saw six men carrying a coffin in the cemetery. Two hours later they were still carrying the coffin around the cemetery I thought to myself "They've lost the plot"
- Why are cemeteries the best place to write a story? Because they have so many plots in them
- What do they call a cemetery where it's a mix of different religions and creeds A melting plot
- I was about to make a joke about an overcrowded cemetery... But there was no plot.
- I saw six men with a coffin walking aimlessly around the cemetery Looks like they had lost the plot
- There is one advantage to being an anti-vaxxer. Child cemetery plots are way cheaper than adult ones.
- Why did the film critic protest the new children's cemetery? He's not a fan of juvenile plots.
- There's been four dudes wandering around our local cemetery all morning. I think they've lost the plot.
- The Chinese government are seizing my land to build a cemetery.
It has to be a Communist plot. - Did you hear that prices are going up all around? They are even charging more for plots at the cemetery. They say it's due to cost of living expenses.
Hilarious Fun Plot Jokes That Will Have You Rolling with Laughter
What funny jokes about plot you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean scene jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make plot pranks.
Guy walks into a f**... home
He tells the receptionist, my wife is dying, and i need to buy a gravesite.
Receptionist says, sure, no problem. Just fill out this paperwork and we'll get the process started.
Guy says, well you should know up front this might get complicated. See, my wife weighs 800 pounds.
Ah, the receptionist says. The plot thickens.
Two chemists walk into a bar.
Two chemists walk into a bar.
The first one says, "I'll have some H2O."
The second says, "I'll have some water too. But why'd you order it like that? We aren't at work."
The first chemist excuses himself and weeps in the bathroom.
His assassination plot had failed.
"I own a small allotment...", So far I'm the only person I've heard laugh at this joke.
I own a small allotment. Every night someone throws soil in on top of in. I've absolutely no idea why.
The plot thickens.
I made up a joke today.
What's the worst thing about pornographic literature?
Too many holes in the plot.
I bought a vacant piece of land recently, and every night someone keeps depositing soil on the land. I still can't figure out who it is.
The plot thickens.
I was going to write a book about an x-axis and y-axis on a piece of graph paper.
But there was no plot.
A lawyer and the pope die at the same time and go to heaven...
The pope is first and meets St. Peter at the gates to heaven. St. Peter says welcome to heaven and gives him a nice little plot of land with a decent sized house. The lawyer is next and St. Peter directs him to this huge mansion on the shore of a beautiful lake with anything the lawyer could want. The lawyer asks St. Peter "Why do I get this mansion with anything I could ask for and the holiest man on earth gets a small house?"
St. Peter replies by saying "We've got hundreds of popes up here, but you're the only lawyer!"
Cemetery Plot for Christmas
One Christmas time, an elderly woman opens her present from her son-in-law and discovers a cemetery plot inside. Despite the confusion, she thanks him very much for the gift.
The following Christmas, she approaches her son-in-law and asks where her present is. He simply replies that he didn't get one for her.
"Why not?! You always get me a gift..."
"Well, you haven't used the gift I gave you last year!!"
I recently saw a movie about nuts and bolts.....
The plot was riveting!
Potato Patch
An old man lived alone in the country. He wanted to dig his potato garden but it was very hard work as the ground was hard. His only son Fred, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament.
Dear Fred, I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over I know you would dig the plot for me. Love, Dad
A few days later he received a letter from his son.
Dear Dad, For heaven's sake, don't dig up that garden! That's where I buried the BODIES! Love, Fred
At 4am the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son.
Dear Dad, Go ahead and plant the potatoes now. That's the best I could do under the circumstances. Love, Fred
I'm writing a book about Minecraft.
it's not finished yet, but it has some terrific plot development.
Why can't Micheal Bay be a farmer?
Because he dosen't have a plot.
I went to the cemetery yesterday to lay some flowers on a grave.
As I was standing there, I noticed four grave diggers walking about with a coffin. Three hours later and they're still walking about with it. I thought to myself, They've lost the plot.
I found an plot of soil yesterday. I went back to the site today and found even more soil...
The plot thickens...
Got my mother in law a cemetery plot for Christmas once, and the next year didn't buy her anything. When she asked me why I didn't buy a gift for her I said.....
... because you still haven't used the one I got you last year.
Why did the two most senior nuns in the convent break up a German t**... plot to steal millions in bearer bonds?
Old habits die hard
I'm learning about imaginary numbers...
I can finally plot my s**... life.
A wizard cursed my land yesterday.
Now that's an evil plot!
I visited Karl Marx's grave in London yesterday.
It was just another Communist plot.
Flowers on a Tombstone
The other day I went to the cemetery. I brought flowers to leave at my father's tombstone. He died a bunch of years back, and I could barely remember which plot was his. I even went to place the flowers down at one tombstone before realizing it belonged to someone else. That could've been a grave mistake.
How to start a fight
One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift...
The next year, I didn't buy her a gift.
When she asked me why, I replied,
"Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"
And that's how the fight started.....
Relaxing location
While my parents were making their f**... arrangements, the cemetery salesman pointed out a plot that he thought they would like. You'll have a beautiful view of the swan pond, he assured them.
Dad wasn't sold: Unless you're including a periscope with my casket, I don't know how I'm going to enjoy it.
I'm reading a book about soil
The plot thickens
A powerful tornado tore through our town last night. So far, eight bodies have been found.
Plot twister. It only damaged the graveyard.
A Blonde Walks into a Library
A blonde walks into a library and slams a book on the desk.
She says, "This is the worst book I've ever read!! There's no plot and it has way too many characters!!"
The librarian says, "So that's what happened to our phonebook."
I had an idea for a movie plot where a retired CIA agent searches for his kidnapped daughter in Paris, but it turns out that idea was taken. I had another idea for one where the same agent is kidnapped with his wife in Istanbul, but it turns out that one was taken too.
I'll leave now.
I knew someone had added dirt to my garden.
And so, the plot thickens
The entire plot of spiderman
A teenage boy finds out he can shoot white stuff out his body
There was an old professor who started every class with a v**... joke.
After one particularly n**... example, the women in the class decided to walk out the next time he started.
The professor got wind of this plot, so the next morning he walked in and said, Good morning, class. Did you hear the one about the shortage of w**... in India?
With that, all the women stood up and headed for the door.
Wait, ladies, cried the professor, The boat doesn't leave until tomorrow!
Two chemists walk into a bar
They walk up to the bartender and the first one says:
"I'll have a glass of H2O."
The other then says to his companion:
"Why don't you just say water? I understand that we're chemists an all that, but you don't need to walk around using random terms!"
The first chemist, frustrated, needs to rethink his assassination plot.
I was gonna write a story about Swiss cheese
But the plot had too many holes in it.
Did you see the movie about graphing?
It didn't have a good plot.
Is your normal probability plot approximately linear?
Cause you can distribute your sample over me
Day 20: Still lost at sea.
Crew thinks I know how to plot a course with a compass protractor. I just like making it walk on the map. Pointy leg man
I made a movie about farm life…
…but the film quality was too grainy and the plot too corny…
I like to spoil the plot of Peter Pan for people.
Never gets old.
Some guys tried selling me a f**... plot.
I told him that would be the last thing I'd ever spend my money on.
Charles Dickens was at his publisher's office.
CD: "I'm going to be honest with you, Howard. It's almost complete and I have most of the elements of the story figured out. Great characters, a terrific setting, some good conflict and a theme. But something's missing, and I can't figure out what it is"
Howard: "The plot, Dickens?"
Every time I visit my allotment there's more and more soil
The plot thickens...
I was thinking about going to the grave of Karl Marx
But then I heard it was just another communist plot.
I went to my allotment and found that there was twice as much soil as there was the week before.
The plot thickens...
Having more kids is like making movie sequels
They require a bigger budget, have a worse plot, and get progressively more difficult to name.
why aren't there any movies about swiss cheese?
because the plot has too many holes.
I'm reading a book where someone keeps adding soil to the protagonist's garden.
The plot thickens.
My grandad says every morning when he measures his allotment it's a couple of inches smaller than the day before.
I think He's slowly losing the plot.
What is the strongest part of Batman's armor?
The plot.
Two chemists walk into a restaurant after work
Two chemists walk into a restaurant after work, they sit down at there table and order drinks. The first chemist says, "I will have some H20", the second chemist says, "I will have a glass of water, and dude why are you referring to it so strangely, we aren't at work anymore."
The first chemist then goes into the bathroom and cries as his assassination plot has failed.
On a film set, everyone is getting ready to start shooting, when the director calls for his assistant to bring him the script.
The assistant runs onto set and starts k**... over props, crawling around the floor and frantically pulling his hair.
As the assistant starts tearing off his clothes and shaking them around, the director thinks to himself, "He's lost the plot!"
Why does mystery story writer insists upon mixing additional crushed stone while laying the foundation?
So the plot thickens.
When I die I want to be buried in wet concrete
So that over time the plot thickens
Plot Twist
A hotel receptionist gets a call*
Man: Hello, I'm in room 210, you need to send someone to my room immediately. I'm having an argument with my wife and she's saying that she's going to jump out of the window.
Receptionist: I'm sorry sir, but that's a personal problem. We cannnot help you with that.
Man: Listen you idiot. The window is not opening and that's a MAINTENANCE problem.
Dad on Deathbed
[Deathbed]
Dad: Don't put me in the wrong burial plot
Son: Dad stop it, I'm never turning this life support off!
Dad: because that would be...a grave mistake lol
Son: So is it this switch here or
(cr
I saw a movie about a farmer who went out of business
The plot wasn't very good
What do you call it when a Cambodian dictator opens up a restaurant in his Cannabis plantation?
Pol p**...'s p**... Plot Hot p**....
I was really excited when I learned about imaginary numbers in my Algebra class.
Finally, I could plot my s**... life.
Fifty Shades of Grey has no plot.
It's just all c**....
Karl Marx's Grave
It's just a Communist plot
A teacher would always enter the classroom with a v**... joke
The girls decided that next time he does it they would all leave the room. Now the teacher caught wind of this plot and when the day came, he said: it turns out that there is a boatload of w**... that are going to Africa at this all the girls start to leave the teacher stops them by saying hey, hey ladies! The boat leaves next week
Did you hear about the failed Canadian plot to bomb Mexico with a nuclear missile?
It went south fast.
I recently discovered that someone had been putting soil in my yard
The plot thickens
I've been reading this farmer's autobiography and just got to the part where he expands his carrot farm.
The plot thickens.
