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Pliers Jokes

6 pliers jokes and hilarious pliers puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about pliers that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Share Hilarious Pliers Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter

What is a good pliers joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

What do you call two filipino pilots?

A pair of pliers

Proud Dad moment here: I was changing out a light fixture in the front hall and asked my 16yo son to hand me a pair of pliers

As he gave them to me, he said Sure Dad — many hands make light work.

Two English men and an Irish man are in a bar.

The first English man says "I think my wife is cheating on me with an electrician, I found a pair of pliers under our bed."
The second English man says "My wife is cheating on me with a plumber, I found a pipe under our bed."
The Irish man looks at both English men and says "Well my wife is cheating on me with a horse. Last night I found a jokey under our bed."

Extraction

A dentist ran out of anesthetic just before the last extraction for the day was scheduled. He gave the nurse a very large needle, instructing her to jab it hard into the patient's b**... when the signal was given, so it would take his attention away from the tooth extraction. It all happened in an instant. The nurse, patient, and pliers were in place. The signal was given, and the nurse bayoneted the patient with the needle just as the dentist yanked the tooth. Afterwards, the dentist asked, Hurt much? The patient hesitated, Didn't hardly feel it come out. And, man, those roots were really deep!

What happens when you try to pull out a tooth using the "string and doorknob trick" or a pair of pliers?

You get fired from your job as a dentist.

What do you call a bottle that eats pliers, screwdrivers, and hammers?

A tool eater bottle.

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