Plea Jokes
34 plea jokes and hilarious plea puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about plea that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Plea Short Jokes
Short plea jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The plea humour may include short begs jokes also.
- #BREAKING Oscar Pistorius has today made a plea for clemency ahead of his sentencing in April Mr Pistorius claims he is not the first bloke to come home legless and put a few loads into his missus.
- What's the best board game for someone that's experienced a great deal of desperation from the opposite gender? Men all plea
- My mum thinks I'm funny, but I just get all of my jokes from here, what should I do This is not a joke, it's a legitimate plea for help
- Lot of talking about the Gigafactory getting shut down Apparently, it's a plea deal on Elon Musk's battery charge
- A ballerina on trial went before the judge The judge asked if she was willing to take plea deal A or plea deal B.
After much deliberation with her lawyer
She said she'd like to plié - I got charged with stealing from the Apple store. But I made a plea deal and got it reduced to scrumping.
- A man goes to court for public urination. The judge asks him, "How do you plea?"
The man replies, "standing up, your honor." - Did you hear about the guy on trial for m**... trying to get off with an insanity plea by pretending he's a fish? He was trying to be coy
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Plea One Liners
Which plea one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with plea? I can suggest the ones about appeal and begged.
- Pleas hold the Terrestrials I always hate when the add Extra.
- Why did the lizard fail to plea for manslaughter Because it was in cold blood
- What did Abe Lincoln say to the judge when he asked how he pleas? I'm in a cent.
- People keep begging me to stop telling old fashioned jokes. Take my wife's pleas....
- What does a black lawyer deliver in court? n**...' pleas
Cheerful Plea Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!
What funny jokes about plea you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean bitten jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make plea pranks.
A priest is being chased through the woods by a hungry bear.
As the priest is running, he makes an impassioned plea to God: Oh please God, in your infinite wisdom and mercy, turn this bear into a good Christian!
Before he can get another word out, he trips over a log and goes sprawling. The bear catches up and approaches the terrified priest. Rising up on its hind legs, it puts its paws together, and says
Lord, thank you for this meal that I am about to receive.
I'm pleased to announce Reddit has achieved its goal in becoming one of the top 10 green companies in the world!
The front page is now made up of over 90% recycled content
I'm very pleased with my new fridge magnet.
So far I've got twelve fridges.
There's no pleasing my wife sometimes.
She wanted help with the housework so I got my girlfriend to come round and she went mental.
After facing down the sadistic bowling ball who just finished killing his entire family, the last remaining bowling pin had one final, desperate plea as the ball menacingly approached him...
"Spare me."
I never had the pleasure of meeting you
Me: I never had the pleasure of meeting you ...
She: Come on, we've met thrice before.
Me: Yes, but I never had the pleasure.
For those who know nothing about pleasing a woman:
The g spot is located at the end of the word 'shopping'.
My wife's a pleaser
My wife loves to help others, even when someone doesn't appreciate her. I told her one evening she should quit trying to please everyone else all of the time. Her reply was, "But I wouldn't get anything else done if I'm just pleasing myself all the time." d**... I love that woman.
What is a sure way to pleasure 9 out of 10 people?
Gang r**....
How do you pleasure a capitalist?
An invisible h**....
I pleaded to my doctor, I feel constepatid!! Chuckling, he replied, I think you mean constipated.
I said, No, I just had a vowel movement!"
They weren't pleased that I played I heavy metal song in the church
but I resolved it on Gsus
A man and his lawyer walk into the courtroom and stand before the judge.
The judge asks "What does the defendant plea?"
The lawyer replies "Your honor, my client pleads trans-guilty."
The judge has a puzzled look on his face.
Lawyer: "He identifies himself as an innocent man."
Always plead idiocy, if you can provide evidence.
It's foolproof!
The pleasure is all mine...
The greeting of a greedy hedonist.
I'm really pleased to see a surge of interest in Information Technology.
Some of the most popular videos on YouTube right now are about IT!
me: "I plead insanity, your honor."
judge: "its just a parking ticket"
No Pleasing Women
My girlfriend's cat died, so I got her one just like it. Now she's locked me out of the house and is yelling "What am I supposed to do with two dead cats?"
It's my pleasure to tell you what month it is...
May is International m**... Month!
What is the least pleasant state to live in?
Missouri.
I was actually pleased when my ex husband came into money..
He lost his job at the bank
Pleasing you girlfriend.
I asked a friend of mine what ways he pleases his girlfriend since I felt I was losing some spark in the bedroom. He told me, "Try waking her up with o**... s**...."
The next morning, I woke up early to see if it would work. She wasn't too amused. She screamed, "What are you doing!? Get that out of my mouth!"
What is the most pleasing five letter word?
Money
