Planting Flowers Jokes
40 planting flowers jokes and hilarious planting flowers puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about planting flowers that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Planting Flowers Short Jokes
Short planting flowers jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The planting flowers humour may include short planting seeds jokes also.
- I've never understood giving flowers to someone on Valentine's Day. "Here's a dying plant... because i love you?"
- If dogs were plants, what would they be? Collie-flowers
I'm gonna go shoot myself in the head now - Whenever my friend who does psychic shows for a living went to the toilet, I could always hear her giving a performance to her flowers, and she knew everything about them. Turns out they were plants.
- At first I wasnt so open to the idea of planting flowers on my face But it started to grow on me
- I planted some flowers, but they never grew. Should have seen it coming. The package did warn that they were p**....
- What do you call a narcissistic plant with an e**...? A self-raising flower.
I'm so sorry.
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Planting Flowers One Liners
Which planting flowers one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with planting flowers? I can suggest the ones about buying flowers and flower garden.
- What do you call it when two flowers have a child? Plant parenthood.
- I accidentally planted the wrong flowers in my garden Oopsie daisies
- How do you call a flower on steroids? A power plant.
- You can't plant flowers... ...if you haven't botany.
- What do you call a flower that is also a spy? A plant
- Pollen is what happens when flowers can't keep it in their plants.
- Where did the promiscuous girl from belgium go to plant her flowers? ze Hoegaarden.
- Where does the gardener go to get rid of her unwanted flowers? Plant Parenthood
- What do you call a flower that changes it's gender? ...A trans-plant
- Where do hippies get all their flower power? From a nuclear plant
- Pollen When flowers can't keep it in their plants.
- I heard flowers make great parents It's probably because of plant parenthood.
- The flower had an unexpected pregnancy... So it went to Plant Parenthood.
- Why are flowering plants such good test takers? Because they have all of the anthers!
- What do you call a p**... who plants flowers? A garden h**...
Planting Flowers Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about planting flowers you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean planting tree jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make planting flowers pranks.
A bricklayer, a gardener and an electrician
A bricklayer, a gardener and an electrician argue about whose job is the oldest
The bricklayer goes first: "You see, we were there already when the pyramids were being built!"
The gardener answers: "True, but we already planted the flowers and trees in the garden of Eden."
To that, the electrician says: "You are right! But when god said 'Let there by light', we already layed the cables!"
I visited a flower garden
Last week I visited a flower garden in my city. There is a lot of exotic and rare plants. The rarest of the plants are all in one part, behind locked gate. You can go there only with a guide or a presenter. Unfortunately, when I came, there was no guide available. I peeked in and saw a gardener tending to the plants. I asked him if he could let me in and show me around. He said, he cannot do that, only a presenter can do that. I really wanted to see those plant so I asked him why it cannot be him. He said "Well, I am a grower, not a shower.''
Professor San Holo
Prof San Holo was busy at his lab. He was experimenting with splicing genetic material from rams into eggs of bees. With global warming, certain species of flowering plants flourish while others perish. The idea was to give bees the ability to digest leaves and grass to make honey and thereby reduce the need to be reliant on nectar and pollen from flowers.
The first splicing was a disaster. The bee digestive system became dysfunctional.
The second attempt disrupted the honey production with lactose contaminant.
The bee grew tiny horns in the third!
He then tried DNA from a sheep and Eureka! Yes indeed. It worked because he
Made the Fourth Bee with Ewe.
Mothers Day Prank Suggestion
I played this simple and harmless joke on my mum a few years back and the family still laughs about it. Here you go:
Go to the local greenhouse or place that sells plants. Buy a really nice flower p**... (empty) and a bag of potting soil. This is the key, while you are there snag one of the tags from a nice looking flower that has its name, picture and whatnot on it. Make sure its something exotic so she is excited about it. Then fill the empty p**... with potting soil, stick the tag into the empty p**... and put a nice bow on it. When you give it to her say something like "the lady at the greenhouse said this is a really beautiful plant when the bulb grows but be sure to water it daily, it should grow in like 3-5 weeks". Done. Mom thinks she go a nice gift and you get to watch her water a p**... of dirt for at least a month until she decides to dig up the bulb thinking maybe she killed it... At this point I suggest you have an actual gift ready to give to her because I had to make an emergency trip to the greenhouse after being told: DONTCOMEHOMEWITHOUTAGODDAMFLOWERFORME!!!!! or something like that. Dad was still laughing when I got home, and afterwords mom even said it was a pretty good joke.