The Best 77 Planet Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Planet jokes. There are some planet venus jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these planet orbit puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Planet Jokes and Puns

Blonde vs. Space

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were taking a tour inside of NASA space center. The tour-guide asked them "What planet or other object in our universe would you go to?"

The red head said. "I'd go to Saturn!"

The brunette said, "I'd go to the Moon!"

The blonde said "I'd go to the Sun!"

The tour-guide looked at the blonde. "But if you go the Sun, you'll burn up and die."

The blonde rolled her eyes and replied calmly. "What, do you think I'm stupid? I'd go at night!"

How do you organize an intergalactic party?

You planet

How do you get ready for a trip around the Sun?

Planet

Planet joke, How do you get ready for a trip around the Sun?

How do you organize a party in outer space?

You planet.

How does NASA organize a party?

They planet.

Sorry.


Where did people find out that Pluto was no longer a planet?

The orbituaries.

My favorite name for a planet is Saturn...

it has a nice ring to it.

Planet joke, My favorite name for a planet is Saturn...

I wanted to throw an earth day party...

But I forgot to planet

Out in space two alien life forms are speaking with each other.

The first alien says, "The dominant life forms on the earth planet have developed satellite-based nuclear weapons."
The second alien, who looks exactly like the first, asks, "Are they an emerging intelligence?"
The first alien says, "I don't think so, they have them aimed at themselves."

You can be the most beautiful woman on the planet but if you can't cook

don't worry I can

Do you know why astronomers named the planet "Saturn?"

It just had a nice ring to it.

You can explore planet probe reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean planet spaceship dad jokes. There are also planet puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


What's a gay man's favorite planet?

Earth, most likely. Unless he's personally interested in space exploration, in which case he might say Mars.

What's Hitler's least favorite planet?

Jewpiter

What's a space pirate's favorite planet?

mArrrs!

What the the planet Jupiter say to Neptune?

I can see Uranus from here.

How does NASA organize their company parties?

They planet.

[Please take pity on me i am very unfunny :(]

Planet joke, How does NASA organize their company parties?

Why did Pluto miss the solar system party.

He didn't planet right

BREAKING NEWS: NASA announces Mars Rover discovered new feline-like life form on the Red Planet

Unfortunately, it ran over the newly discovered creature. Yes, it seems Curiosity killed the cat.

They should call Jupiter JEWpiter

Because its a gas planet.


If Earth is the third planet from Sun after Mercury and Venus

Doesn't that make every country a third world country?

I went up to Serena Williams.

I said, "Serena, what's your favourite planet?"

She said, "It's Venus."

I said, "Oh sorry, Venus, what's your favourite planet?"

A planet died today

I read about it in the orbituaries.

Q: How do astronomers organize a party?

**They planet.**

How does NASA throw a holiday party?

They planet.

Why did Mickey Mouse name his dog Pluto?

Because he's not a planet.

"Dad, why are there no jews on jupiter?"

"Because its a gas planet son"

Bruno Mars, Venus Williams and Freddie Mercury walk into a bar

But they didn't planet that way

Earth, Venus, Mars, and Jupiter were going to setup a party

But they failed because nobody knew how to planet

If Bruno Mars married Venus Williams on Earth, do you think they'd have a Sun?

Only if they planet.

An alien mothership is scouting planet Earth.

Alien Scout: Sir, the Humans appear to possess massive military capabilities, nuclear weapons included.

Alien Commander: This is problematic, are they really such an intelligent species?

Alien Scout: Apparently not Sir, they appear to have them pointed at themselves.

What if dinosaur bones were only found on Earth...

Because aliens used this planet as a pet cemetery?

From the time it was discovered to the time it was declassified as a planet, pluto did not make a full revolution around the sun.

It was a tough year.

Scientists have discovered a planet populated entirely by robots.

They call it Mars.

We should start calling the planet "unborn baby"

maybe then republicans would want to save it.

How can you ensure you visit outer space someday?

Planet.

I ran into a NASA scientist one day...

...and I say to him, "Your job seems so tough. I'd love to traverse the solar system, but I wouldn't even know where to begin..."

He says, "It's easy... you just planet."

So I took his advice and went on a trip around the Sun. It lasted a year and I had a pretty good time. But if I had to rate it, I'd only give it one star.

Jupiter heard from Neptune that Pluto was pregnant.

Jupiter said to Pluto "Congratulations! I was surprised to hear that you're expecting!"

To which Pluto replied "Thanks. Yeah, I definitely didn't planet!"

So aliens flew by our planet recently and one asked the other...

Alien 1 How advanced is that civilization?

Alien 2 They have discovered nuclear technology.

Alien 1 Oh boy... That's pretty intelligent. We better keep our distance then from their missles.

Alien 2 Nah, they're not that smart yet. They have em pointed at themselves.

Alien 1: The dominant life form on planet earth have developed satellite based nuclear weapons.

Alien 2: Are they an emerging intelligence?

Alien 1: I don't think so, they have them aimed at themselves.

Earth is the best planet...

The mere rotation of it makes my day!

What was the money called on Superman's home planet?

Kryptoncurrency

In space, two aliens are talking to each other very closely

The first alien says, "The dominant life forms on the Earth planet have developed satellite-based nuclear weapons."

The second alien asks, "Are they an emerging intelligence?"

The first alien says, "I don't think so, they have aimed at themselves"

Two Aliens

2 aliens are talking in outer space, looking down on Earth.

"It seems the inhabitants of planet Earth have created nuclear technology and missiles" says one alien

"are they showing signs of intelligence?" asks the other

"I dont think so. They seem to be aiming at themselves"

Aliens and Humans

"Alien: why should I not blow up this planet?

Human: we are an advanced species

A: how do you travel?

H: we light old dinosaurs on fire"

How does NASA get away with murder?

They planet

I called Serena Williams. I said, Serena, what's your favorite planet?

She said, It's Venus.

Me: I'm sorry Venus. Could you put Serena on the phone?

All 8 planets are singing Happy Birthday to the Sun and it sounds terrible.

Everyone turns to Earth and Earth says, "don't look at me, I'm not flat"

What is Hitlers least favourite planet?

Jewpiter

200Years in the future.

A team of the smartest people on earth go to a distant planet, believed to have life. When they land they're greeted by 3aliens. They speak perfect english.

"Leave outsiders. This is our home planet, only trusted individuals are allowed here!"

The space group is quite surprised by this. Most of them think about turning back and going to earth. When one man in the back of the group, Unseen by the aliens, Shows himself. Upon his sight the aliens appear to become much more peaceful with the humans.

"Oh you brought Dave with you! Why didn't you say so."

Google has decided to heavily push a save the planet program.

They're making Al-Gore-ithms to help speed things along.

Saturn is a really catchy name for a planet.

It has a ring to it.

How do you organise a party in space?

"You planet"

Jupiter, Saturn, and Pluto walk into a bar.

After sitting down, Jupiter says: "I'm the biggest planet, give me the biggest beer you have."

Saturn says: "I'm the best looking planet, give me the fanciest drink you have."

Pluto says: "I know I'm not a planet, but give me a shot."

Why did Pluto have such a terrible vacation?

Because he didn't planet well.

I'm not racist, but...

If I could put an end to any race on the entire planet, I'd get rid of the marathon.

Earth is the third planet from the sun.

By this logic, all countries are third world countries

Freddy Mercury, Venus Williams Williams Bruno Mars all happened to walk into the same bar.

But they didn't planet that way.

How does earth and mars schedule a vacation

They planet

Maybe Jesus didn't like your chocolates

So aliens come to earth and they're Sooo nice. There's a huge televised event with all the world leaders in attendance.

The Pope asks, "Do you know of Jesus Christ?"

The aliens say, "Do we Ever? Awesome guy!! Swings by the planet every couple of years to say Hi!"

The Pope exclaims, "Every couple of years?? What!!?? We're still waiting for his second coming!"

The alien replies, "Maybe he didn't like your chocolate?"

The Pope is flabbergasted, "What does chocolate have to do with anything?"

The alien says, "Well when he came the first time, we gave him a huge box of chocolates! Why? What did you guys give him?"

A very very Very old joke :)

What did the meteor say to the planet?

Lemme smash

On October 31st, we will have a full moon, and the 7th planet from the sun will be its brightest...

So when someone sees the moon that day, they will likely see Uranus too...

Why is there never a food shortage on the planet of Tatooine?

Because of the abundance of sand which is there.

Aliens come to earth...

They meet with all the world leaders. Eventually it's the Pope's turn to chat to them. He asks the one alien, Greetings alien, what do you think of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ?
The alien exclaims, Ah, JC! He's my boy! We have a massive party when he visits us once a year!
He visits you once a year? The Pope asks in astonishment. He hasn't been to earth in more than two millennia! How did you manage that?!
Well, when he first came to our planet we gave him a box of our finest chocolates. What did you guys do?

They say one out of every 5 people on the planet is Chinese.

The thing is, there's 5 people in my family. On of us must be Chinese.
I know it can't be me. I'm pretty sure it's not my mon or dad.
That leaves my brothers: Shawn, and Zhang Wei.

Whispers: *I think it's Shawn...*

What is the scariest planet in Star Wars?

Na-BOO!

How do you memorialize the death of a planet?

You write an orbituary.

250 lbs here on Earth is 94.5 lbs on Mercury

No, I'm not fat. I'm just not on the right planet.

I have a space pun

But i need a little more time to planet

Scientists have finally figured out what happened to all the water that used be Mars

Turns out, the planet was once occupied by Nestle

Three "facts" school taught me that turned out to be false

1. Pluto is a planet
2. You won't always have a calculator in your pocket
3. Girls don't like having their hair pulled

A Republican and a Democrat found a magic lamp

The genie said "I will grant one wish per person". The Republican immediately jumped forward and said "I wish all Republicans and conservatives had their own planet, separate from all these libs." The genie nodded and the Republican vanished. The Democrat then asked "Are they all on their own planet?" "Yes" said the genie. "Are you sure? All of them?" The genie said "Yes" one more time. Then the Democrat said "I guess I'll just have a glass of water then."

The scientific community has finally agreed to rename the planet Uranus

to Urmama

There must be another planet somewhere with worms.

Otherwise why would we call ours Earth worms

There are 2 types of people on this planet

Those who can extrapolate omitted data using existing data.

Why are hyenas the healthiest animals on the planet?

Because laughter is the best medicine.

What do vegan black holes say?

"I'm on a strictly planet based diet"

Scientists recently discovered that there's no such thing as gravity...

This planet just sucks.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the planet moons jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working planet spacecraft piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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