The Best 23 Plaice Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Plaice jokes. There are some plaice sediment jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these plaice schist puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Plaice Jokes and Puns

I was unlucky to be sacked as a chef for using the incorrect fish and herbs

Wrong plaice, wrong thyme

I have a joke about fish and herbs.

But I don't think now is the thyme or the plaice to tell it.

I wanted to make a lame pun thread about fish.

But its not the right time or plaice.

Plaice joke, I wanted to make a lame pun thread about fish.

I was going to make a joke about herbs and fish...

But this is neither the plaice nor the thyme to do so.

Last night, in bed, my wife asked me to put fresh fish and herbs on her.

I said, "There's a thyme and a plaice for that sort of thing."


Sorry to anyone who felt my joke about herbs and fish was inappropriate.

I realise there's a thyme and a plaice for these things...

Why couldn't the man open a fish and herb shop?

Because he didn't have the thyme or the plaice.

Plaice joke, Why couldn't the man open a fish and herb shop?

I remember once I was forced to choose between Dwayne Johnson and a lifetime supply of frozen fish.

I was stuck between a Rock and a hard plaice.

What did the chef say to his assistant when he got handed the wrong ingredients?

This is neither the thyme nor the plaice.

Why was the fisherman upset with his new property?

After selling his sole for a small plaice perched by the sea (something to the tuna 500 square feet), he found something fishy within contract and realised he cod do better if he weren't such a cheap-skate.

I was hosting a funeral for my goldfish, and my friend thought it was okay to ask "What herbs should I season which fish with?"

I told him "Come on dude, there's a thyme and plaice."

You can explore plaice minnow reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean plaice anemone dad jokes. There are also plaice puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


A young woman starts choking on her seafood at a restaurant.

The man behind her says "Stand back! I'm a doctor!" and proceeds to use the Heimlich manoeuvre on her.

A whole small fish shoots out of her mouth and the woman finally gasps in a few breaths.

The doctor picks up the fish and says "What's a plaice like you doing in a girl like this?"

The fish and chip shop near me has gone into liquidation

Now the owner is stuck between a rock and a hard plaice

A man walks into a fish and chip shop...

"Nice plaice"

When it comes to seasoning fish..

It's all about right plaice, right thyme

What do you call a fish that stands out?

Out of plaice.

Plaice joke, What do you call a fish that stands out?

I was going to make a really herby fish dish...

...but I couldn't find the thyme or the plaice.

One time, I got squashed against a giant frozen fish by Dwayne Johnson

I was stuck between a Rock and a hard plaice.

The weirdest thing happened to me today, Dwayne Johnson was holding me down wgilst a fishmonger hit me with a frozen fish.

I was stuck between The Rock and a hard plaice


I used to work in a Fishmongers and acted like I knew everything.

I soon learned my plaice.

When it comes to cooking herb-crusted fish...

...there's a thyme and a plaice.

On one side of me was Dwayne Johnson, and the other, a stone fish.

I guess I was just between the Rock and a hard plaice.

I was trying to think of a pun about herbs and fish but it was neither the thyme nor plaice.

but it was neither the thyme nor plaice

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the plaice cod jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working plaice slag piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes