Pitch Black Jokes
14 pitch black jokes and hilarious pitch black puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about pitch black that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Pitch Black Short Jokes
Short pitch black jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pitch black humour may include short long black jokes also.
- I got called racist for saying 'pitch black' The umpire disqualified me and told me I struck out and that the better thing to say would be 'Jamal, I'm ready for your fastball'.
- I remember how my uncle died.. Driving an 18 wheeler rig down a long, icy road in the pitch black with no working headlights. He swerved and suddenly BAM!
Cancer. - My worst nightmare was when I was trapped in a pitch-black room with Iron Man. It would've been fine, but I'm afraid of the Stark...
- What is Vin Diesel's l**... style? Pitch Black, Multi-f**..., x**... and Fast and Furious.
- How many dead h**... does it take to change a light bulb? Apparently, more than five because my basement is still pitch black.
- How many dead h**... are needed to change a light bulb? I don't know but for sure more than 10, as my basement is still pitch black.
- The EU referendum I liken the EU referendum to being in a pitch black room with two men in a mandatory r**... scenario with both of them telling you theirs is the smallest.
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Pitch Black One Liners
Which pitch black one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pitch black? I can suggest the ones about black dress and black noise.
- I just saw the movie Pitch Black. What a dark movie.
Pitch Black Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about pitch black you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean black forces jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make pitch black pranks.
Through the pitch-black night, the captain sees a light dead ahead on a collision course with his ship.
He sends a signal: "Change your course ten degrees east."
The light signals back: "Change yours, ten degres west."
Angry, the captain sends: "I'm a Navy captain! Change your course, sir!"
"I'm a s**..., second class," comes the reply. "Change your course, sir."
Now the captain is furious. "I'm a battleship! I'm not changing course!"
There's one last reply. "I'm a lighthouse. Your call."
Change your course
Through the pitch-black night, the captain sees a light dead ahead on a collision course with his ship. He sends a signal: Change your course 10 degree east.
The light signals back: Change yours, 10 degrees west.
Angry, the captain sends: I'm a navy captain! Change your course, sir!
I'm a s**..., second class, comes the reply. Change your course, sir.
Now the captain is furious. I'm a battleship! I'm not changing course!
There is one last reply. I'm a lighthouse. Your call.
A young Swedish woman, old Dutch woman, an Englishman, and an Irishman are riding a train.
A young Swedish woman, **an** old Dutch woman, an Englishman, and an Irishman are riding **on** a train.
The train goes through a tunnel, it becomes pitch black in the car, and then a loud s**... is heard.
The train emerges from the tunnel and the Englishman is rubbing his cheek.
The old Dutch woman thinks: "He must have groped the young Swedish woman, and she slapped him."
The young Swedish woman thinks: "He must have tried to g**... me, and accidentally got the old woman, and she slapped him."
The Englishman thinks: "The Irishman must have groped the Swedish girl, and she accidentally slapped me."
The Irishman thinks: "I can't wait for another tunnel so I can s**... that English guy again."
A philosopher and a priest argue about their beliefs
So the priest says to the philosopher condescendingly: "Look friend, what you're doing is, you're looking in a pitch-black room with blinded eyes for a black cat that simply isn't there."
The philosopher thinks for a minute, nodding his head, and answers, "You're right, but I do it almost exactly like you. You too are looking in a pitch-black room with blinded eyes for a black cat that isn't there - but you then go on and try to make everyone believe that you found it."
A young Programmer and his Project Manager board a train headed through the mountains on its way to Wichita. They can find no place to sit except for two seats right across the aisle from a young woman and her grandmother. After a while, it is obvious that the young woman and the young programmer are interested in each other, because they are giving each other looks. Soon the train passes into a tunnel and it is pitch black. There is a sound of a kiss followed by the sound of a slap.
When the train emerges from the tunnel, the four sit there without saying a word. The grandmother is thinking to herself, "It was very brash for that young man to kiss my granddaughter, but I'm glad she slapped him."
The Project manager is sitting there thinking, "I didn't know the young tech was brave enough to kiss the girl, but I sure wish she hadn't missed him when she slapped me!"
The young woman was sitting and thinking, "I'm glad the guy kissed me, but I wish my grandmother had not slapped him!"
The young programmer sat there with a satisfied smile on his face. He thought to himself, "Life is good. How often does a guy have the chance to kiss a beautiful girl and slap his Project manager all at the same time!"