Pirate Jokes

• Short Pirate Jokes
• Pirate One Liners
• Pirate Ship Jokes
• Bartender Pirate Jokes
• Pirate Day Jokes
• Pirate Hook Jokes
• Pirate Booty Jokes
• More Pirate Jokes

Best Short Pirate Jokes

Short pirate puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pirate humour may include short buccaneer jokes also.

1. A pirate goes to the doctor and say, "I have moles on me back aaarrrghh." The doctor: "It's ok, they're benign."
   Pirate: "Count again, I think there be ten!"
2. While driving to work, robbers jumped into my car and stole everything. They were pirates of the car I be in.
3. How did Metallica get people to stop pirating their music? They stopped releasing anything worth listening to.
4. What is something with 8 eyes, 8 leg, and 8 hands? 8 pirates
   My little brother told me this joke and I am so proud of him.
5. What is a Pirate's favorite letter? The one from the General Manager telling him he's been traded to the Mets.
   Thanks to everyone who awarded this post! You're so kind .
6. When receiving payment in gold coins, pirates used to verify their purity by biting into them In other word, criminals only accepting payment in bit coins goes long way back
7. What's a pirate's favorite letter? A writ of safe passage from his majesty, king Charles II of England.
8. What's a pirate's least favourite letter? Dear Sir,
   We are writing to you because you have violated copyright ...
9. What is a pirates favorite letter? The one from the Governor telling him he's been pardoned.
10. As told to me by my 7 YO son this morning... Him: What's a pirates favorite letter?
    Me: ARRRGH!
    Him: You would think it would be ARRRGH but my first love be the "C"!

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about pirate can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of pirate puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Pirate One Liners

Which pirate one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pirate? I can suggest the ones about sailor and hacker.

1. Russia started a new website that tracks down and deletes pirated movies. Nyetflix.
2. You know what has 8 legs 8 hands and 8 eyes? 8 Pirates
3. Why can't pirates learn the alphabet? Because they spend years at C.
4. What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye Matey!
5. What's a pirates favourite letter? P, because without it they're irate
6. What's a pirate's favorite letter? Ye'd think it was R, but his first love be the C.
7. What's a pirate's favorite musical note? The High Cs
8. Just watched a pirated movie On a scale of 1-10, I'd give it a 3.14
9. 3.14% of all sailors are Pi-rates! (Have a great pi-day)
10. What do you call a communist pirate ship? The USS-ARRR
11. How much did the pirate pay to have his ears pierced? A buccaneer :D
12. What's a pirate's favorite explosive? M80
13. What does a pirate say when he puts his peg leg in a freezer? Shiver me timbers!
14. What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye matey
    Credit to my sister
15. What did the pirate say when he turned 80? 'Aye matey"

Pirate Ship Jokes

Here is a list of funny pirate ship jokes and even better pirate ship puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What do you name an American, Communist Pirate Ship? The U.S.S. ARRRGH
• What did the pirate say when he saw his kid lighting the ship on fire? Arrr son!
• Pirate Ship Captain: Can someone tell me how to write the number 2 in Roman numerals? Crew: I I captain.
• What do you call first aid on a pirate ship? Sea pee yarrrrrrrr!
• What has 7 eyes and 7 legs? A ship with 7 pirates
• What do you call a ship that drives itself? Auto-pirate.
• What happens when a red pirate ship and a brown pirate ship meet on a deserted island? They get marooned
• What did the proud pirate dad say after seeing his son torch an enemy ship? Arr, son.
• A pirate walks into a bar with a ships wheel down the front of his pants. The bartender says, "Hey mate, what's with the wheel?" The pirate responds, "Arg, it's driving me nuts!"
• Why didn't The Black Pearl get cold and drafty on cold winter nights at sea? Because pirate ships have a very high Arrrrrr value.

Bartender Pirate Jokes

Here is a list of funny bartender pirate jokes and even better bartender pirate puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A native American, Pirate, and Frenchman walk into a bar. The bartender walks over and says, "Gentlemen, hau, arrrrrrr, oui, today?"
• A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants Bartender: "Why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?"
  Pirate: "Arrrr, it's driving me nuts!"
• A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants. The bartender asks, "Hey, buddy, doesn't that bother you?"
  The pirate says, "Yar, it's drivin' me nuts."
• A pirate walks in a bar... A pirate walks in a bar with a paper towel on his head, the bartender says "whats with that" the Pirate says "ARR!! I have Bounty on me head"
• A pirate wearing a paper towel on his head walks into a bar. The bartender asks What's with the paper towel? The pirate says Arrr matey, I have a bounty on me head!
• A Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel stuck between his legs. Bartender: What's with the steering wheel?
  Pirate: Arr, it's drivin' me nuts!
• A pirate walks into a bar... The bartender says, "Hey pirate, what's with the paper towel on your head?"
  The pirate replies, "Arrr, I got a bounty on me head."
• A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his head. The bartender sees this and asks him why.
  The pirate replies, "Arr, I've got a bounty on me head!"
• A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants. The bartender says "You know you got a steering wheel in your pants"
  The pirate says "Aye, and it's drivin' me nuts!"
• A pirate walks into his favorite bar with a roll of paper towels on his head The bartender says " What's with the paper towels Skipper? "
  The pirate says " Arr, there be a bounty on me head "

Pirate Day Jokes

Here is a list of funny pirate day jokes and even better pirate day puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants. When the bartender points it out, the pirate replies "Arrrgh, it's been driving me nuts all day."
• Why can't pirates wear sunglasses? Because they have no buccaneers!
  Happy speak like a pirate day!
• it's international Talk Like A Pirate Day! enjoy a cross-re-post. What's a Pirate's favourite letter?
  You'd think it'd be r, but a pirate's first love is the C.
• Why do pirates have trouble learning the alphabet? Because they spend years at Sea!
• The other day I saw a pirate with a steering wheel on his belt When I asked him about it he said Arrgh, it's drivin' me nuts
• Did you hear about the band of roving pirate toddlers? They spend their days sailing the Hi-C
• How do pirates know they're pirates? They think, therefore they AAAARRR.
  My dad just told me that and I laughed. So dumb but it's Talk Like A Pirate Day.
• What does a pirate do after a long days work? What does a pirate do after a long days work?
  He has some Arr and Arr!
• Where does a pirate go to do his taxes? H&Rrrrrr block (pirate voice)
  I thought of this the other day, not sure if it's an actual joke or not, made me laugh at myself though.
• How did the pirate get his Jolly Roger flag on the cheap? He bought it on sail.

Pirate Hook Jokes

Here is a list of funny pirate hook jokes and even better pirate hook puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Why is pirating so addictive? Once you lose your first hand, you get hooked.
• Why do pirates like to watch boxing? Because they can all appreciate a strong right hook.
• Where do pirates get their hooks? At the second-hand store!
• Where do pirates buy their hook hands from? From a second hand shop.
• Why can't pirates use sign language? Because the hook makes everything sound like a question.
• What was the pirate boxing champion known for? His left hook.
• Have you heard that new pirate song? It has a great hook.
• I just started a pirate themed band with my friends, but we're having trouble writing songs for it All we seem to be able to write are the hooks
• Where did the pirate get his hook? From a second hand store.
• What's the best part of a pirate song? The hook.

Pirate Booty Jokes

Here is a list of funny pirate booty jokes and even better pirate booty puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Ghost pirate What did the pirate's ghost say to his girlfriend?
  I love your Boo-ty
• Girl asked me to netflix and chill, but I download all my movies illegally.... So I was like na, more like pirate and b**....
• Since We're Doing Pirate Jokes. What Does Every Pirate Hate? A small chest with no b**....
• What is a pirate's worst nightmare? A sunken chest and no b**....
• Are pirates a**... men or t**... men a**... men. It's all about the quality of the b**..., not the size of the chest.
  Came up with this a few months ago and keep forgetting to post it.
• What's a pirates worst fear on a blind date? A sunken chest and no b**....
• What's a pirate's greatest fear on the first date? A sunken chest with no b**....
• What is a necrophiliac pirate's favorite hobby? Diggin' for b**....
• What's a necrophilic pirate's favorite activity? Digging for b**....
• What is a group of gay pirates favorite pastime? p**... each other's b**...

Playful Pirate Jokes to Add Joy and Laughter to Your Group

What funny jokes about pirate you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean bandit jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make pirate prank.

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