pint of less Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious pint of less puns

So a guy walks into a bar and orders a pint of less.

The bartender asks, "What's less?" The guy says "I don't know but the doctor told me I have to start drinking it."


An Irishman walks into a bar...

An Irishman walks into a Dublin bar, orders three pints of Guinness, and drinks them down, taking a sip from one, then a sip from the next, until they're gone. He then orders three more. The bartender says, "You know, they'd be less likely to go flat if you bought them one at a time."

The man says, "Yeah, I know, but I have two brothers, one in the States, one in Australia. When we all went our separate ways, we promised each other that we'd drink this way in memory of the days when we drank together. Each of these is for one of my brothers and the third is for me."

The bartender is touched, and says, "What a great custom!"

The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar and always orders the same way.

One day he comes in and orders two pints. The other regulars notice, and a silence falls over the bar. When he comes to the bar for his second round, the bartender says, "Please accept my condolences, pal."

The Irishman says, "Oh, no, everyone's fine. I just joined the Mormon Church, and I had to quit drinking."


An Irishman visits his doctor after a long illness.

An Irishman goes to his doctor after a long illness.
The doctor, after a lengthy examination, sighs, looks him in the eye and says, "I've some bad news for you. You have cancer, and I'm afraid it can't be cured. I'd give you two weeks to a month to live."
The guy is shocked and saddened by the news, but of solid character. He walks back into the waiting room where his son is waiting for him and says, "Well son, we Irish celebrate when things are good, and we celebrate when things don't go so well. In this case, things aren't so well. I have cancer, and I've been given a short time to live. Let go to the pub and have a few pints."
After four or five pints, they are feeling a little less somber. There are some laughs and more beers.
Eventually the two are approached by some of the guy's old friends who ask them what they are celebrating. So the guy tells his friends, "I've got only a few weeks to live as I have been diagnosed with AIDS."
His friends give are quite shocked about this and so they stay to have a couple of beers with him and his son.
After his friends leave, the guys' son leans over to his dad and whispers in confusion „Dad, I though you said that you had cancer? Why you just told your friends that you were dying from AIDS!"
Well , the guy says, "I just don't want any of them sleeping with your mother after I'm gone."


An elderly Irishman walks into a bar...

He asks the bartender for 3 pints, sits down and drinks all 3. Next week he does the same thing, and so on, week after week, until finally the bartender asks him:

"Pardon me sir, but I happen to notice you order 3 beers each week, without fail... no more, no less. May I ask why?"

"Oh, well I have 2 brothers you see, and so I have a pint for each of them and one for me as well."

A few years later, the Irishman walks into the bar, but he only orders 2 pints this time. The bartender is surprised, and after a while he realizes what's happened.

"Pardon me sir, I don't mean to pry, but I notice you've ordered only 2 this week and, well, I'd like to extend my condolences for your loss. I have a brother myself, and I can only imagine the pain it would cause..."

"No lad," interrupted the Irishman, "I'm just off drinking!"


What are the most funny Pint Of Less jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Pint Of Less? Well, here are the best Pint Of Less dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Pint Of Less pick up lines to share with friends.

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