Pin Jokes

Humoristic puns and funny pick up lines

When you pull the pin on a grenade, how do you put it back in?

Quick answers please.

TIL After Nigeria was unable to win any medals in this year's Olympics, the Nigerian Sports Minister personally offered to refund all the expenses of fans that traveled to Brazil.

He said he just needs their bank details and pin numbers to complete the transaction.

After his team was eliminated from the World Cup,

The Nigerian captain personally offered to refund all expenses that fans of his country paid for to travel to Brazil.

According to sources close to the player, he just needs their bank details and pin numbers to complete the transactions.

Chuck Norris joke, cause it's been a while

Chuck Norris pull the pin in a grenade, threw it, killed 50 men, and then the grenade exploded.

If anyone ever figured out my secret 4-digit code, I'd be screwed! They'd have my bank pin #, phone unlock code, front door lock code...

...they'd even know my birth year!

Is it possible to stop a grenade from exploding by putting the pin back in?

I need a quick answer to this question

I bought a grenade today...

Things went terribly wrong when the cashier asked me for my PIN.

This will blow your mind!

If you take the pin out of a grenade and put your ear to the hole you can hear the faint sound of the world wide I.Q average increasing.

A blonde threw a grenade at another

So she pulled the pin and threw it back.

The first then asks, "What should I do with this pin?"

Hey guys quick question, can you put a pin back in a grenade?

Gonna need a fast answer for this one...

Going through customs at a US airport

Customs agent: Do you have anything to declare today?
Me: *starts sweating* ummmmm no. *trips and falls. Hundred of Kinder eggs spill from my pockets, jacket and bag*
Customs agent: GET ON THE FLOOR NOW!
Me: But, I am -
*armed guards swarm around and pin me down*
Armed guards: WHAT'S IN THE EGGS!!!
Me: I don't know, it's a surprise!!

(Sorry if the formatting sucks. On mobile)

What do you do if a blonde person throws a grenade at you?

Pull the pin and throw it back.

Church

Molly and Charlie were at Sunday school at their local church, and Molly, being tired, began to fall asleep. The Sunday school teacher then proceeded to ask:
''Who came down from heaven to save our souls?''
Charlie sticks a pin in Molly's arm as she wakes up with a start:
''Jesus christ!''
''Well done Molly, thats correct''
Molly then goes back to sleep. The teacher asks her another question:
''Who lives up in heaven and created the earth?''
Charlie again sticks the pin in her arm as she again wakes up:
''God almighty!''
''Correct again Molly''
Molly then goes to sleep for a third time, as the teacher asks her another question:
''What did Eve say to Adam after their 23rd baby?''
Charlie again sticks the pin in her arm as Molly wakes up and shouts:
''If you stick that thing in me one more time, I'll snap it in two!''

8621. If this makes it to the front page, odds are it's someone's ATM PIN.

...it was mine.

Latvian joke.

I tell Latvian joke:

Latvian man very hungry.

He go in minefield, look for potato feed family.

Many hours, he suddenly find big potato, size of fist!

He quickly pull out pin, put in mouth, swallow whole thing.

Then he say "But why was there pin in potat "

End from joke.

My friend gave me a new "magic" golf ball.

As long as you put to within 3 inches of the pin, the ball will always find its way to the hole.

He did not recommend I keep it in my back pocket.

You know you're drunk when...

...you get home, put food in the microwave, and then enter your pin number.

Little Johnny fell asleep in Sunday school...

The teacher asked, "Johnny, who is our Lord and savior?"
The boy behind him poked him in the back with a pin.
Johnny shot upright and shouted, "Jesus Christ!"
"Correct," said the teacher.
Johnny then fell back asleep.
The teacher called on him again, "Johnny, who was Jesus's mother?"
Again, the boy behind Johnny poked him.
Johnny woke up again and exclaimed, "Mary mother of God!"
"Correct," said the teacher once more.
Johnny fell back asleep.
The teacher called on him one last time, "Johnny, can you tell me what Eve said to Adam after she gave birth to their 23rd child?"
The boy behind him poked him once more.
Johnny shot up and shouted, "YOU STICK THAT THING IN ME ONCE MORE AND I'LL SNAP IT IN HALF!"

A blonde threw a grenade at me

So I pulled the pin and threw it back

Can you put the pin back in a grenade?

It's kind of urgent. Need and answer fast.

PIN number

My PIN number is the last four digits of pi

Can you put a pin back in a grenade?

no really guys I need an answer ASAP

I was having a hard time remembering my PIN on my debit card....

So I changed it to 0911. That way I never forget.

A boy pokes a girl with a pin at church

The church priest asks the girl a question "who is our lord and savior?" *the boy stabs her with the pin* she yells "JESUS CHRIST" the priest says "good good, who created us" *the boy stabs her again* she yells "GOD ALMIGHTY" the priest says "good good, now, what did Eve say to Adam after they had their 42nd child?" *he stabs her again* the girl screams "IF YOU PUT THAT THING IN MY ONE MORE TIME IM GONNA SHOVE IT DOWN YOUR THROAT!" The priest faints..

What is Jeremy Clarkson's PIN number?

Nought two sixty.

What's a police officer's favorite party game?

Pin the murder on the black guy

Axl Rose sat on a pin.

Axl Rose.

I'm trying to get in touch with my old judo instructor.

He is a hard man to pin down!

A group of men are out sailing when they decide to see what the chef is cooking for dinner.

They walk in and, being that he doesn't have a rolling pin, see him flattening biscuits with his armpit.

That's disgusting! One guy says to the other.

Yeah, well you should see how he makes donuts!

A man goes to church for confession....

A man goes to Church to confess..............

Man: Hi Father, my five years old Son is very naughty.
He made all the female servants pregnant.

Father: Incredulously, and how on earth did he do it???

Man: He took a pin and punched holes in all my condoms

Pre-

Some numbers are having a party

There's 3, 4, and 5 playing pin the tail on the donkey. 8, 9, and 0 are chasing a ball around. Everyone is laughing and having a great time.
Except for little 2. Alone he sits in the corner quietly watching everyone play. After some time he says, too quietly for anybody to hear, "would anyone like to play?". But no one hears him. All the numbers keep carrying on and having a great time. Quietly he says again, "would anyone like to play?". But again, no one hears him.
Later on he says to his mum, "mum why can't I play with the other numbers?". And his mother just looks at him and shakes her head. "Because, son, you're not a loud two."

Did you know that if you pull the pin off of grenade and hold it up to your ear

You can actually hear the world getting smarter.

How do you stop a baby from walking in circles?

Pin its other hand to the ground.

how do you put a pin back into a grenade?

There apparently is no way, so you jus

What type of cereal goes to the gym twice a day?

Shredded wheat.

I wish I could pin this joke on a 4-year-old, I'm so sorry

A man proudly sporting an I Love Trump pin passes a liberal man on the sidewalk. As he does so, he trips and falls.

Oh my god! Exclaims the liberal, Are you alt-right?

If you pull the pin out ofa grenade, is it possible to put it back in it so it won't explode?

I kinda need a quick response

What sounds like a pin hitting the floor, but louder?

A PIN HITTING THE FLOOR.

What do you call an African who plays 10 pin bowling online?

Ebola.

Pull the pin out of a grenade...

and you can keep it for the rest of your life.

What did the inflatable principal say to the inflatable student who brought a pin to the inflatable school?

Not only have you let me down, you have also let the school down but mainly you have let yourself down.

Mary Rose sat on a pin

Mary rose!

After getting acupuncture, my chronic muscle pain is completely gone.

The pin really is mightier than the sore.

Little Mary

Little Mary never did very well in church. She would always fall asleep when the priest was speaking. One day, while Mary was happily sleeping, the Priest said "Mary, who created the Earth as we know it"? The little boy behind Mary got bored, took out a pin, and poked Mary with it in the back. Mary jolted awake and screamed "Oh good Lord"! "Good job"! said the priest. A little later, the Priest asked sleeping Mary "Mary, who was born on December 25th and is celebrated for Christmas?". The little boy stuck the pin in her back again and Mary screamed "Oh Jesus Christ!". "Good job!" said the priest. After Mary yet again fell asleep, the priest asked "Mary, after having their 23rd baby, what did Eve say to Adam?". The boy stuck the pin in Mary's back and she screamed "If you stick that thing into me one more time, I will rip it in half!".

I heard that your mom uses her weight as her phone's pin code.

Guess that's why Apple changed it from four digits to six.

Which sport is the quietest?

Bowling. You can hear a pin drop.

What do you do if a blonde girl throws a grenade at you?

You remove the pin then throw it back at her.

TYPICAL WOMEN..

A woman and man get into a car accident. Both of their cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither one of them is hurt.

After they crawl out of the wreckage, the woman says, "Wow, look at our cars -- there's nothing left! This must be a sign from Him that we should be friends and not try to pin the blame on each other."

The man replies, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely."

The woman points to a bottle on the ground and says, "Somehow this bottle of Scotch from my back seat didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this Scotch and celebrate our good fortune."

She hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it, and chugs about a third of the bottle to calm his nerves. The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"

The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police."

A farmer, an engineer, and a mathematician are building a fence...

The farmer, drawing from his years of farming experience, tells the others about how much wood and materials they'll need to build the pin for his sheep to graze.

The engineer, determined to find the exact amount of materials to build the fence, draws up a series of complex equations and calculates the perfect amount of materials to build the perfect pin for the farmers sheep.

The mathematician, however, has already gathered all the materials he needs and says to the others I've got both of you beat
He proceeds to build a fence in a very tight circle around himself and when he's done he says
I define myself as being outside of this fence

joke

An inflatable child took a pin into their inflatable school full of inflatable children. He's caught, and given a stern talking to. The headteacher/principal says to him,"Not only have you let me down, you've let the school down, and you've let yourself down too."

What should you do if an Aussie throws a grenade at you?

Pull the pin and throw it back.

What's a pin without a point?

Pointless. ^^^I'm ^^^sorry

Did you hear about the dress maker who went to the ATM?

She was electrocuted when she put in her pin.

After Nigeria was eliminated from the world cup the Nigerian captain personally offered to refund all the expenses of fans that traveled to Brazil.

He said he just needs their bank details and pin numbers to complete the transaction.

I take pride in being a gentleman.

"Do you want me to pay?" I asked.


She said, "Oh, yes please."


"No problem," I replied. "All I'll need is your card and your pin code."

Chuck Norris pulled a pin on a grenade, threw it, and killed ten men.

...then the grenade exploded.

Angela Rose

Angela Rose sat on a pin. Angela rose.

military jokes

"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
--U.S. Marine Corps

"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
--USAF Ammo Troop

"If the enemy is in range, so are you."
--Infantry Journal

"A slipping gear could let your m203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
--Army's magazine of prevention maintenance

"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."
--U.S. Air Force manual

"Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo."
--Infantry Journal

"Tracers work both ways."
--U.S. Army Ordnance

"Five-second fuses only last three seconds."
--Infantry Journal

"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."
--David Hackworth

"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush."
--Infantry Journal

"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection."
--Joe Gay

"Any ship can be a minesweeper....once."
--Anon

"Never tell the platoon sergeant you have nothing to do."
--Unknown Marine Recruit

"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
--Infantry Journal

"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him."
--USAF Ammo Troop

I know there is something that I need to hang my notes on wall.

Just can't quite pin down on what it is.

I got my girlfriend a push pin for our anniversary

Pretty tacky, isn't it?

Two men get into an elevator

Two men get into an elevator in a doctors office. One man, beaming says to the other, "I just got a brand new hearing aid. It works great; if you were to drop a pin, I could hear it; if a mouse were to sneeze cross the street, I would hear it." The second man replies "thats impressive, what kind is it?" The first man looks down at his watch and says "11 o'clock."

Three guys and a woman are playing golf...

The woman is having the round of her life as she steps onto the 18th green after hitting a beautiful shot 10 feet from the pin. If she makes this putt, she will beat the course record that has been around for over 50 years.

So she says the guys, "If one of you help me make this putt, I will give you a blow job."

This lady is drop dead gorgeous so they are all excited.

The first guy steps up and says, "Okay you want to give it a soft touch, it's downhill and to the right."

The second guy pushes him out the way and says, "No No! Give it a firm tap, it's flat and slightly left."

The third guy is standing there not doing anything so the lady asks, "Don't you have any advice for me?"

He looks over at her and says, "I say it's a gimme."

Blonde Jokes

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You pull the pin and throw it back!

How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? Tell her a joke on Tuesday.

Why can't a blonde dial 911? Because they can't find the 11.

A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied,
"You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer."


Now your turn!

Alright, man. We'll finish working on your voodoo doll tomorrow. But for now...

...let's just put a pin in it.

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?

Catch the pin

What do you do if an Islamist throws a pin at you?

Run. He still has the grenade in his teeth.

Zero word punchlines

* Does this smell like chloroform to you?
* I wonder what happens when I pull this pin?
* Does this hurt?

Comment some more!

The inflatable headteacher at the inflatable school caught the inflatable student bringing a pin into the classroom.

He said, "Not only have you let yourself down, you've let me down, you've let your teachers down, and you've let the whole school down..."

Him: "Why do you always have to correct everything I say? What are you, trying to earn your Pedantry Badge in Boy Scouts or something?"

Me: "It's actually a pin, not a badge..."

I told my wife that I'd gotten a new job at the bowling alley

She said ten pin?

I said no it's permanent!

A cash machine has just charged me two pound for a transaction but told me to cover my PIN to prevent from being robbed. Pretty ironic if you ask me

The teacher was quizzing the bible students...

and she asked "Who parted the Red Sea?"
Just then, rotten little Johnny poked Suzy with a pin, causing her to exclaim "Holy Moses!"
The teacher said "Very good, Suzy!"
Then the teacher asked "Who turned water into wine?"
Johnny pokes Suzy with the pin again, who hollers "Jesus Christ!"
The teacher can't contain herself, and asks Suzy "What did King Davids wife say to him as they retired for the night?"
Johnny pokes Suzy yet again, bringing forth the exclaimation "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I'm gonna break it off!"

I don't understand why little kids like playing Pin the Tail on the Donkey. Why would anyone want a complete jackass showing up at a party?

na today be today

*An American, an English man, and a Nigerian were on a ship. Suddenly the Devil appeared and said, Drop anything in the sea, if I find it I will eat u, If I can't, I will be your slave! The American dropped a pin, the Devil found it and ate him. The English man dropped a coin, the Devil found it and ate him too. The Nigerian opened a bottle of water, poured it in the sea and said, Na today be today, go find am! .

What are the funniest pin jokes of all time?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Pin? Well, here are the best Pin puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Pin pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes