Pile Jokes
121 pile jokes and hilarious pile puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about pile that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Need a few laughs? Check out this article for a pile of hilarious jokes about pile cream, pile drivers, rubble, trash, and unloading. These jokes are sure to put a smile on your face!
Funniest Pile Short Jokes
Short pile jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pile humour may include short pond jokes also.
- I was sitting at the bar arranging peanuts into piles of 1, 3, 5 and 7. The bartender asked me if I was trying to set up some odd joke. I told him No, but I would have done that in my prime.
- If there was one thing I had learned from Tetris, Is that my mistakes pile up until the point I cant do anything about them anymore
- I recently got crushed by a pile of books, I recently got crushed by a pile of books, but I suppose I have only my shelf to blame.
- What do you call a man under a pile of leaves? - Russell. What do you call a man under a pile of leaves for thousands of years? Pete.
- What do you call that day when you finally do all the chores and work you've let pile up? Tomorrow
- Why were Gandhi's remains compressed to make piles of 50 rupee coins? he said "be the change you wish to see in the world".
- Two Jewish guys walk into a bar with a funny looking pile of gold. The bartender asks, "What is this, a racist joke?"
One of the jewish guys say, "No, this is comedy gold!" - This morning some bloke drove up to my house in a huge lorry and dumped off a massive pile of lego blocks. I'm so furious I don't know what to make of it.
- My wife screeched at me, "What's this pile of clothes doing on the floor!?" I whispered, "It's a dead Jedi!"
- I played hide seek as a kid and the ultimate winner hid so good we never found him. Years later they found him under a pile of dirt Turns out He won by a landslide
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Pile One Liners
Which pile one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pile? I can suggest the ones about pong and pitch.
- A man died today when a pile of books fell on him.!!! He only had his shelf to blame.,,,,
- What do you call a man having a seizure in a pile of leaves? Russell.
- what do you call a pile of kittens? a meowntain
- Man crushed by pile of old books His wife said he only had his shelf to blame
- What did a pile of sand say to another in sahara Long time no sea
- I once got in a fight with a pile of dirt... The pile of dirt won by a landslide.
- What do you call a pile of hamsters in a river? Hamster-dam.
- What did the hiker say when he fell in a pile of moss? "I'm not lichen this!'
- A man and a pile of mud begin to race... The mud won by a landslide.
- What do you call a pile of frog dung? Toad stools
- How much does a pile of bones weigh?
It must weigh a skele-ton! - Someone has left a pile of plasticine on my desk I don't know what to make of it?
- What do you call a pile of blessed black waist sashes? A Benedictine Cumberbatch.
- A wizard turned my cat into a pile of Indian spice! Oh lawd, he cumin!
- I tried to shuffle a pile of Ibuprofen I guess drug dealing just isn't for me.
Pile Cream Jokes
Here is a list of funny pile cream jokes and even better pile cream puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- So my piles have returned but it's ok... I have back-up cream.
Pile Driver Jokes
Here is a list of funny pile driver jokes and even better pile driver puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What would you call a Street Fighter player who can bust out the Spinning Pile Driver really fast? SPD Gonzales.
Pile Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about pile you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean trap jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make pile pranks.
What's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a Lamborghini?
One of them I don't have in my garage.
Two brothers on Christmas day
So there are two brothers, Jimmy and Timmy
They both run down stairs to see what Santa had brought them
The presents are divided into two piles, with Jimmy's pile being larger
Jimmy say, " Haha, my pile is bigger!"
Then Timmy says," Well, atleast I don't have cancer."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Lone Survivor
The rescue team finds the crashed airplane. The lone survivor is chewing on a bone,with a huge pile of bones next to him. The rescuers are shocked. He says "You can't judge me for this, I had to survive." The rescue leader says "But, Christ, man ... your plane went down two days ago!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
When I'm having s**... with a woman I prefer to do it atop a pile of fermented apples…
I just love the feeling of being in cider.
Dark Jokes?
What's worse than 18 dead babies in a bucket? 1 baby in 18 different buckets.
What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my Garage.
Two guys were out on a lake ice fishing
One looks at the other and sees that he's got a pile of fish, and asks him,
"hey buddy, how'd you catch so many fish and I'm sitting here with nothing?"
"Eep or orms orm" the man grumbled
"What?"
"Eep or orms orm!"
"Buddy, i got no clue what you're saying!"
The man spat in exasperation and said, "Keep your worms warm!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Quadriplegic jokes I've gathered from over the years.
What do you call a quadriplegic that hangs on your wall?
Art.
What do you call a quadriplegic that lays on your porch?
Matt.
What do you call a quadriplegic that is in a hole?
Doug.
What do you call a quadriplegic in a ditch?
Phil.
What do you call a quadriplegic doing water ski jumps?
Skip.
What do you call a quadriplegic floating in the water?
Bob.
What do you call a quadriplegic playing in a pile of leaves?
Russell.
What do you call a quadriplegic inside of your mail box?
Bill.
How can you tell if your wife left you?
You get laid the same amount of times but the dishes start to pile up. Hey now!
A joke for fall.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves?
Russell.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An Irishman, Russian and the Blonde...
An Irishman, Russian and a Blonde come across a magical slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Russian amazed slides down screaming "v**...!", and lands into bottles of v**... at the bottom. The Blonde takes her turn, and without hesitation shouts "WEEEE!" as she slides down.
A purple man has a purple wife.
They have two purple kids and live in a big purple house. One day they decide to take a vacation, so they all pile into their purple car, drive it to their purple boat, and set out to sea. Sadly the boat crashes and they are stranded on a small island. The purple man looks to the heavens in desperation and cries, "Oh no! We've been marooned!"
Two zombies were playing a game of poker
The first one threw his hand in the pile and the other laughed his head off.
Why did a pile of gravel go to jail?
aggregated basalt
Joke of the Day 6/12/14
The other day, I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up,and I said " Did you get my drift?".
What's the difference between a million dollar car and a pile of dead babies?
There's no million dollar car in my garage.
Two flies are sitting on a steaming pile of horse manure.
One of the flies grunts and breaks wind. The other fly says, "Geez! Do you mind? I"m trying to eat over here!"
What do you call a pile of cats?
A MEOWTAIN.
Told this one at work after two weeks straight of 12+ hours days and laughed so hard I got sent home for the rest of the day to get sleep. To this day, every time I tell it I start giggling uncontrollably... Yep.
Three Greeks and Three Turks are riding a train.
The Turks each buy one ticket, but the Greeks only buy one ticket total. The Turks are confused.
"How can you ride with one ticket?"
"Watch and you shall see."
The Greeks get on the train and pile into the bathroom. The Turks sit near the bathroom and observe. The conductor knocks on the door and says "Ticket please." The Greeks slide the ticket through the door.
The Turks think this is ingenious! They decide to try it, so on the ride back they buy only one ticket. But the Greeks don't buy any.
"How will you ride without any tickets?"
"Watch and you shall see."
They get on the train. The Turks pile into one bathroom, the Greeks into another. One Greek gets out of the bathroom, walks over to the bathroom the Turks are hiding in, and says:
"Ticket please."
A commissar goes to a collective farm...
... And hails a farmer to ask about how his village's farms are doing.
The farmer says "Oh Comrade Commissar, if we stacked all the potatoes in a pile, it would reach the foot of God!"
The commissar raises an eyebrow and says "Comrade farmer, we live in the USSR. There is no god."
The farmer replied: "That's okay, there are no potatoes either."
Whether you are a pile of rubble or dust in the wind...
...depends on how you were razed.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I just got fired from the grocery store for being too violent...
...all I did was put out a sign that said, "take lettuce from top of pile or heads will roll!"
Another blonde joke
A blonde, a brunette, and a red head are hiding from a farmer in a barn.
The brunette hides in a horse stable.
The red head hides behind a cow.
And the blonde hides in a pile of potatoes.
As the farmer walks up to the stable the brunette says "neiiigh". He goes to the cows and the red head goes "mooo". The blonde hears this and as the farmer approaches her corner of the barn she says "potato potato potato"
There was a pile up on the freeway....
reportedly due to a bunch of old underwear, scattered all over the road. No one is sure how they got there, but there were skidmarks everywhere
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Some idiot at my work opened up every cabinet in our records department, pulled out all the folders, put them on a pile on the floor, then s**... all over it.
Now I have to spend tomorrow refiling the aisles of files he defiled in a pile on the tile.
What's brown and steaming and lies behind the barracks?
Gomer's pile.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Today, my wife found a pair of her sister's p**... in our room.
They were in my laundry pile, next to my boxers.
Now she's mad, because I told her it was only a brief affair.
My friend has been hiding something.
I was cleaning my friend's room for him the other day and moved a pile of clothes off of the floor and into the hamper. To my surprise, when I lifted them, I found a perfectly gelled, expertly trimmed mustache on the ground, I saw him the next day and confronted him about my discovery. ''You got me.'' he said... I had just found his secret stache.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's worse than stepping on a pile of horse manure?
Getting r**... by a giant scorpion.
I wish my parents ran when they heard The Rolling Stones.
Now they're stuck under a pile of rocks.
What did one pile of wood chips say to the other?
Nothing.
They weren't mulch for conversation.
A father puts a gold watch in one son's stocking and a pile of manure in the other son's...
The first son brings the watch to his father and with a worried face says, "dad I'm not sure what to do with this watch, it's fragile, and small, and I don't really wear watches. I don't like it."
The father wasn't surprised by his son's reaction because he typically has a poor perspective on things.
Minutes later, the second son, who had a stocking full of manure, comes running to his father with excitement and says, "Dad! I think Santa brought me a pony! Now I just have to go find it!"
It's all about perspective.
The HR takes the top 20 application folders from the pile and throw it in the trash.
Those people have bad luck. We don't want people with bad luck.
Joe was chopping wood with his Dad
Joe: Dad, I think I want to be a pilot!
Dad: That's great, start over there. You can grab that wood and pile it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How can you tell if your wife is dead?
The s**... is the same but the dishes pile up.
Did you hear they cremated Zsa Zsa Gabor today?
All that was left was a pile of glitter.
I don't see the point in my elderly neighbour subscribing to local newspapers .....
If all she is going to do is let them pile up outside her door.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I hate when women say they're lonely when I'm here...
It's like saying you're hungry when there's a pile of cold spaghetti on the floor outside.
When I'm a hiring manager and I receive a pile of CVs
I throw half of the pile in the trash. I don't want unlucky people working in my department.
When employing people, gather all the CVs together and randomly split them into two piles.
Take one pile and throw it in the bin. This stops you employing anyone unlucky.
God is watching
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.
At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: 'Take only ONE . God is watching.'
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I think my wife died...
I mean, the s**... is the same, but the dishes are starting to pile up.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde visit a magical bridge.
The sign reads "Magical bridge: Jump off the bridge and shout out what you want to land in and so it shall be."
The brunette goes first, she climbs on the rail, jumps off and yells "Pillows!" She lands safe and sound in a pile of pillows.
The redhead jumps next. " Hundred dollar bills!" She yells and lands in a huge pile of money.
The blonde goes last. She climbs up, jumps off and gets scared. She yells "Oh shiiiiiiiit!"
Saw a bunch of kids playing outside today in a pile of leaves
Just kidding. One of them dropped their phone in it and they were just looking for it.
So I'm walking into this bar, with a big pile of dirt under my arm.....
I say to the bartender, Gimmie two beers, one for here and one for the road!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The armed grenade was under a pile of chick peas, tahini and olive oil.
Captain Smith threw himself on top of it to save his men from the inevitable e**....
His medal for bravery was awarded post-hummusly
If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other
Is it still called a dog pile?
A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim find a pile of coins
A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim find a pile of coins.
They start arguing what they should take and what they should give to God.
The Christian draws a circle and says, We throw the coins into he air, and whatever lands in the circle, we keep.
The Muslim says, No no no. Whatever lands outside the circle we keep.
The Jew says, How about we throw it in the air, and whatever God wants, he keeps, and whatever falls to the ground we keep.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A treasure hunter found gold inside a pile of dried turds.
He went through a lot of hard-s**... to get it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you hear about the guy who had s**... with his sister in a pile of lemon peels?
It was in zest
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call h**... in the North Pile?
Frostitutes
What do you call a big pile of kittens?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A Meowtin.
/told by my 7 year old niece this morning. I lol'ed pretty hard.
Zeus Cast Down A Sacred Pile of Cloth for Mere Mortals to Sleep On
Mortals: Holy Sheet!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you hear that there's a table over there with a pile of free c**... one it?
You better get there quick. It looks like people are already starting to form a line
Saw a guy betting anyone $50 to see if he could fire a bullet into a pile of cow dung 30 yards away.
I thought to myself, that's kind of a crapshoot.
What's the difference between a pile of leaves and a pile of prostitutes?
The cops ask to see my permit when I burn a pile of leaves
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Dirty dead baby jokes?
My dad told me some pretty bad ones, so I guess let's collectively get them out there
Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Cadillac?
A: I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.
Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend?
A: I don't kiss my girlfriend after s**....
Today my 10 year old daughter referred to the pile of dirty laundry that my wife is doing as.
Mount Wash More.
You know that satisfaction you feel after sweeping when you have a big pile of dirt and know it was worth it?
I love when that same feeling when you wash your hands after taking a dump
Good pickup line.
Two male flies are buzzing around the farmyard when they spot a female fly landing on a fresh pile of cow dung.
The one fly says, "Wow, she is cute! I'm going to try to talk to her, wish me luck."
He swoops down, lands right next to her and says, "Excuse me Miss, is this stool taken?"
Help
Once after a heavy snowfall i was riding with a female co-worker. The roads had not yet been cleared of snow but we pushed ahead regardless, all the cars following in the same ruts. At the intersection the snowplow passed and left a pile of snow in front of us. We blew through it but it stalled the car and we were nit able to clear the intersection. My lady friend got behind the wheel and i went to push, but no luck. I told her to get out and pretend to push. No sooner than she did, no less then six dudes jumped out of their cars to help her
Did you hear about the all-feline team that competed in the Iditarod?
They didn't win the grand prize, but they did go home with a pile of cold, hard cats.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Days ago, i learned how to crack neck. The sound and feeling are really satisfying.
Although the bodies are starting to pile up.
A guy goes into a grocery store.
He sees a pile of potatoes, and asks the store keeper:
"What are those?"
"Those are potatoes"
"Can I have a kilo of potatoes individually wrapped?"
The store keeper shakes his head and start wrapping potatoes.
"What are those?"
"Those are plums..."
"Can I have a kilogram of plums all individually wrapped?"
The store keeper cusses under his breath and starts packing plums.
"... and what are those?!
"Those are poppy seeds and they are NOT for sale!"
