Pile Jokes

Following is our collection of funnies and chistes working better than reddit. They include Pile puns, dirty or clean gags suitable for kids, that are actually fun like the best witze.

The Best jokes about Pile

I think my wife died...

I mean, the sex is the same, but the dishes are starting to pile up.

A man died today when a pile of books fell on him.!!!

He only had his shelf to blame.,,,,

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim find a pile of coins

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim find a pile of coins.

They start arguing what they should take and what they should give to God.

The Christian draws a circle and says, We throw the coins into he air, and whatever lands in the circle, we keep.

The Muslim says, No no no. Whatever lands outside the circle we keep.

The Jew says, How about we throw it in the air, and whatever God wants, he keeps, and whatever falls to the ground we keep.

How can you tell if your wife is dead?

The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

God is watching

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.

At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: 'Take only ONE . God is watching.'

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples

I just got fired from the grocery store for being too violent...

...all I did was put out a sign that said, "take lettuce from top of pile or heads will roll!"

What do you call a man having a seizure in a pile of leaves?

Russell.

If there was one thing I had learned from Tetris,

Is that my mistakes pile up until the point I cant do anything about them anymore

I recently got crushed by a pile of books,

I recently got crushed by a pile of books, but I suppose I have only my shelf to blame.

An Irishman, Russian and the Blonde...

An Irishman, Russian and a Blonde come across a magical slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Russian amazed slides down screaming "VODKA!", and lands into bottles of vodka at the bottom. The Blonde takes her turn, and without hesitation shouts "WEEEE!" as she slides down.

What do you call a man under a pile of leaves? - Russell. What do you call a man under a pile of leaves for thousands of years?

Pete.

What do you call that day when you finally do all the chores and work you've let pile up?

Tomorrow

what do you call a pile of kittens?

a meowntain

A purple man has a purple wife.

They have two purple kids and live in a big purple house. One day they decide to take a vacation, so they all pile into their purple car, drive it to their purple boat, and set out to sea. Sadly the boat crashes and they are stranded on a small island. The purple man looks to the heavens in desperation and cries, "Oh no! We've been marooned!"

My friend got crushed by a pile of books.

He's only got his shelf to blame.

A father puts a gold watch in one son's stocking and a pile of manure in the other son's...

The first son brings the watch to his father and with a worried face says, "dad I'm not sure what to do with this watch, it's fragile, and small, and I don't really wear watches. I don't like it."


The father wasn't surprised by his son's reaction because he typically has a poor perspective on things.


Minutes later, the second son, who had a stocking full of manure, comes running to his father with excitement and says, "Dad! I think Santa brought me a pony! Now I just have to go find it!"


It's all about perspective.

Two guys were out on a lake ice fishing

One looks at the other and sees that he's got a pile of fish, and asks him,

"hey buddy, how'd you catch so many fish and I'm sitting here with nothing?"

"Eep or orms orm" the man grumbled

"What?"

"Eep or orms orm!"

"Buddy, i got no clue what you're saying!"

The man spat in exasperation and said, "Keep your worms warm!"

Quadriplegic jokes I've gathered from over the years.

What do you call a quadriplegic that hangs on your wall?

Art.

What do you call a quadriplegic that lays on your porch?

Matt.

What do you call a quadriplegic that is in a hole?

Doug.

What do you call a quadriplegic in a ditch?

Phil.

What do you call a quadriplegic doing water ski jumps?

Skip.

What do you call a quadriplegic floating in the water?

Bob.

What do you call a quadriplegic playing in a pile of leaves?

Russell.

What do you call a quadriplegic inside of your mail box?

Bill.

An Italian, a Scotsman and a Chinese man are hired at a construction site...

The foreman points to a huge pile of sand and says to the Italian guy "You're in charge of shoveling." He points to the Scotsman and tells him "You're in charge of sweeping." and then he turns to the Chinese guy and says "You're in charge of supplies."

The foreman then shrugs his shoulders and says "Now, I have to leave for a bit, when I get back I expect you guys to make a good dent in that pile of sand." A few hours later when the foreman returns, he finds that the pile has not been touched.

Pointing to the pile of said the foreman demands the Italian, "Why didn't you shovel any of it?" The Scotsman I gotta no shovel. You tella the Chinese guy he inna charge of a supplies but he-a disappeara and coulda no finda him!"

Then the foreman turns to the Scotsman and yells, "Didn't I tell you to sweep up that sand?" The Scotsman replies in heavy brogue, "Aye, ye did laddie, but I couldna get meself a broom. Ya left the Chinee in charge o' the supplies, but I couldna find him?"

So now the foreman is incredibly furious and he storms off towards the pile of sand in search of the Chinese man. Just then, the Chinese man jumps out from behind the sand and yells, "SUPPLIES!"

An Italian, an Irishman and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site...

An Italian, an Irishman and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site. The foreman points out a huge pile of sand and says to the Italian guy, Your're in charge of sweeping, to the Irishman, You're in charge of shoveling, and to the Chinese guy, And you're in charge of supplies. Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a dent in that pile.

So the foreman goes away for a couple hours, and when he returns, the pile of sand is untouched. He says to the Italian, Why didn't you sweep any of it? The Italian replies, I didn't have a broom. You said the Chinese guy was in charge of supplies, but he disappeared and I couldn't find him.

So then the foreman turn to the Irishman and asks why he didn't shovel. The Irishman replies, I couldn't get myself a shovel. You left the Chinese guy in charge of supplies, but I couldn't find him.

The foreman is really ticked off now, and storms off toward the pile of sand looking for the Chinese guy. Just then, the Chinese guy springs out from a closet and yells: SUPPLIES!

Three Greeks and Three Turks are riding a train.

The Turks each buy one ticket, but the Greeks only buy one ticket total. The Turks are confused.

"How can you ride with one ticket?"

"Watch and you shall see."

The Greeks get on the train and pile into the bathroom. The Turks sit near the bathroom and observe. The conductor knocks on the door and says "Ticket please." The Greeks slide the ticket through the door.

The Turks think this is ingenious! They decide to try it, so on the ride back they buy only one ticket. But the Greeks don't buy any.

"How will you ride without any tickets?"

"Watch and you shall see."

They get on the train. The Turks pile into one bathroom, the Greeks into another. One Greek gets out of the bathroom, walks over to the bathroom the Turks are hiding in, and says:

"Ticket please."

Engineers and Lawyers on a Train

Three lawyers buy their tickets for the train. They notice three engineers also buying tickets, or rather, just one ticket. Curious, the lawyers follow the engineers on to the train and sit just behind them.
During the trip the conductor comes along, "tickets please... tickets please." At this point the engineers all get up, walk to the back of the car and all pile in to one bathroom. The conductor checks the lawyers tickets and continues to the back. When he reaches the bathroom he knocks, "tickets please." The door opens a crack and one hand presents the ticket.
Inspired by this craftiness the lawyers agree to use this method on the return trip a few days later. In the train station they see the same engineers also getting ready to return on the same train. The lawyers buy one ticket and the engineers buy... none! Perplexed, the lawyers once again follow the engineers onto the train. Once again the conductor starts checking tickets. The engineers get up and crowd in to one bathroom then the lawyers get up and crowd in to the other bathroom opposite the first.
At this point one engineer emerges from his bathroom, crosses the aisle, knocks on the lawyers door and says in his most official voice, "tickets please."

A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde visit a magical bridge.

The sign reads "Magical bridge: Jump off the bridge and shout out what you want to land in and so it shall be."

The brunette goes first, she climbs on the rail, jumps off and yells "Pillows!" She lands safe and sound in a pile of pillows.

The redhead jumps next. " Hundred dollar bills!" She yells and lands in a huge pile of money.

The blonde goes last. She climbs up, jumps off and gets scared. She yells "Oh shiiiiiiiit!"

I hate when women say they're lonely when I'm here...

It's like saying you're hungry when there's a pile of cold spaghetti on the floor outside.

A foreman working on a construction site walks up to his only workers for the day...

They were an Irishman, Englishman and a Chinese.

The foreman walks up to the Irishman and tells him:

"I will be going out for a few hours to do some paperwork. In the meantime I want you to shovel this pile of gravel into the truck so it can be taken away when I get back."

He then goes to the Englishman:

"You, on the other hand are going to sweep all the dust on the ground left behind by all the cement. I want to see the floor spotless when I return."

He says to the Chinese man:

"I will leave you in charge of the supplies. Make sure everyone gets their supplies."

And having delivered the duties to his workers, the foreman leaves the site to attend to his business.

When he returns, he finds the gravel not shoveled and the floor not swept.

He quickly locates the Irishman and asks him why he didn't do his job. He says: "I would have shoveled this here gravel, but I don't have a shovel. The Chinese guy was supposed to give it to me but I haven't seen him since you left."

He then goes to look for the Englishman, who says: "I can't possibly sweep the floor without a broom and dustpan, as the Chinese man has not given them to me. I have been looking for him for hours but I can't seem to find him."

The foreman, Irishman and Englishman decide to go look for the Chinese man when he jumps out from behind a pillar and yells:

"SUPPLIES!"

Tom is sitting at the bar....

and he's decides he's had enough to drink and tries to stand up to walk home and falls to the floor. he climbs back up to his bar stool and says hes gonna try it again. so he tries to stand up again and falls back to the floor. again he climbs back up on to his bar stool and says ill give it one more try and if i cant walk home ill just crawl. again right to a pile on the floor. Tom says "screw it ill just crawl home." he makes it all the way to his front porch and passes out. in the morning his wife opens the door to find her husband still passed out on the ground and says "Tom did you get drunk at the bar again?" Tom says "how did you know?" wife says "the bar called you forgot your wheelchair again!"

When I'm having sex with a woman I prefer to do it atop a pile of fermented apples…

I just love the feeling of being in cider.

A child psychologist had twin boys

one was an optimist; the other, a pessimist. Just to see what would happen, on Christmas Day he loaded the pessimist's room with toys and games. In the optimist's room, he dumped a pile of horse droppings.

That night, the father found the pessimist surrounded by his gifts, crying.

What's wrong? the father asked.

I have a ton of game manuals to read … I need batteries … and my toys will all eventually get broken! sobbed the pessimist.

Passing the optimist's room, the father found him dancing for joy around the pile of droppings. Why are you so happy? he asked.

The optimist shouted, There's got to be a pony in here somewhere!

I told Sean Connery about how I was crushed by a pile of books.

He said 'you've only got your shelf to blame'.

After the Texan wedding ...

... the newlywed cowboy rides home with his bride. It's a long way back to his ranch, and the horse has to carry both him and his bride, so it stumbles, nearly throwing off the two riders. The cowboy calmly straightens up the reins, waits for the horse to gather and says nothing, except, very calmly:

"One."

Further down the way, a small pile of dirt let the horse stumble again, and again without being fazed in any way, the cowboy lets the horse get up without a word, except a calm:

"Two."

As the sun goes down over the prairie, they are near the ranch. The horse, overlooking a root, stumbles a third time. Calmly, the cowboy says:

"Three."

He gets off the horse, helps off his bride, takes his gun and shoots the horse. His bride is shocked! "How could you, you monster! This poor beast carried us all the way and you shoot it in cold blood! Had I known this, I'd never have married you!"

"One."

What do you call a pile of cats?

a Meowtain

Did you hear about the two car pile up in Mexico?

200 people died.

An Italian, An Irishman and a Chinese fellow.

Hopefully not posted earlier.

An Italian, an Irishman and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site. The foreman points out a huge pile of sand and says to the Italian guy, You're in charge of sweeping. He then jabs a thin finger at the Irishman, You're in charge of digging. Finally, he turns to the Chinaman, And you're in charge of supplies. Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a dent in that pile.

Two hours later, the foreman returns to find the pile of sand untouched, and the Italian and Irishman standing nearby. Why didn't you touch it? he says. The Italian looks at him. We didn't have a broom or shovel. You said the Chinese guy was in charge of supplies, but he disappeared and we couldn't find him. Annoyed, the foreman storms off to find the errant Oriental. Just then, the Chinaman leaps from behind the sand and yells Supplies!

This morning some bloke drove up to my house in a huge lorry and dumped off a massive pile of lego blocks.

I'm so furious I don't know what to make of it.

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police one day. When suddenly, they happened upon a barn. They ran inside to escape the boys in blue and barred the door on their way in. All that was in the barn was a few cows, a couple of pigs, and a pile of potatoes. They could hear the sirens approaching so they had to act fast. The brunette hid behind the cows, the redhead hid behind the pigs, and the blond behind the potatoes. The police broke in and surveyed the area. The brunette, trying to be inconspicuous, decided to imitate the cows. She let out a great big "Moooooo!" The redhead did the same, letting out a pig squeal. The blond, in the spur of the moment, let out the loudest noise of them all. "POOOOTTTAATTTOOOOOO!"

A day at the construction site

An Italian, a Scotsman and a Chinese man, are hired at a construction site. The foreman points out a huge pile of sand.

He says to the Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping."

To the Scotsman he says, "You're in charge of shoveling."

And to the Chinese guy, "You're in charge of supplies."

He then says, "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you men to make a dent in that pile of sand."

So when the foreman returns after being away for a couple of hours the pile of sand is untouched.

He asks the Italian, "Why didn't you sweep any of it?"

The Italian replies, "I no hava no broom. You saida to the Chinesea fella that he a wasa ina charge of supplies, but he hasa disappeared and I no coulda finda him nowhere."

Then the foreman turns to the Scotsman and says "And you, I thought I told you to shovel this pile."

The Scotsman replies, "Aye, that ye did laddie, boot ah could nae get meself a shoovel. Ye left th' Chinese gadgie in chairge of supplies, boot ah couldna fin' him neither."

The foreman is really angry now. He storms off toward the pile of sand to look for the Chinese gent.

Just then, the Chinese man leaps out from behind the pile of sand and yells, "SUPPLIES!!!!"

There was a construction site

There's 3 labourers, ready for their morning job.
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Chinese man.

The boss tells the Englishman, when I get back from lunch, I want this pile of dirt moved over there further.

To the Irishman, after he's moved it, you need to spread the soil.

To the Chinese man, he says you need to help out with all the supplies.

The boss gets back from lunch, and the dirt pile isn't moved.

Why has nothing happened? He asks.
The Englishman says he couldn't find the Chinese man.

He then asks the Irishman who also, cannot find the Chinese man.

He heads to the tool shed, as he is about to open the door, the Chinese man bursts out and yells, SUPPLIES!

A commissar goes to a collective farm...

... And hails a farmer to ask about how his village's farms are doing.

The farmer says "Oh Comrade Commissar, if we stacked all the potatoes in a pile, it would reach the foot of God!"

The commissar raises an eyebrow and says "Comrade farmer, we live in the USSR. There is no god."

The farmer replied: "That's okay, there are no potatoes either."

What Do You Call an Epileptic in a Pile of Leaves?

Russell

A guy walks into a bar and notices a large pile of $10 bills ....

He asks the bartender what the pile of money is about, and the bartender tells him, "We have a long-running contest here. You put in $10, and if you can complete three tasks, you get to walk away with the whole pile."

"What are the three tasks?" asks the man.

"Well, first you have to go over there in the corner, grab that large bottle of tequila, and chug-a-lug the whole thing in one go without making a face.

"Second, you have to go out back where we keep Killer, our crazy mongrel wild dog, and extract one of his teeth using only your bare hands.

"If you get this far, you're going up to the fourth floor. There's an 80-year-old woman living there. She's a virgin, and you have to deflower her."

"Fine," says the man, "I can do this." He throws down his $10, goes over to the corner, grabs the tequila, and downs the whole thing without making a face. The bar patrons give him a light round of applause.

Already feeling tipsy, he stumbles to the back door. For the next three minutes, horrible, guttural animal sounds emanate. He stumbles back in, hair wild, clothes torn to shreds, covered in cuts, bruises, and blood, and growls, "Alright, now where's that old lady who needs her tooth pulled?"

My wife screeched at me, "What's this pile of clothes doing on the floor!?"

I whispered, "It's a dead Jedi!"

An italian, a scot, and a chinese man start their first day working at a construction site...

...so, for their first task, their boss shows them this enormous pile of sand, and tells them they need to move it from point A to point B in two hours.
"You," says the boss, pointing to the italian, "will shovel the sand."
"You," he says to the scot, "will sweep after him."
"and you," he says to the chinese man, "will be in charge of keeping the supplies in check."


The boss comes back, two hours later, and the pile of sand hasn't budged.
"What happened?" he asks.
"The chinese man ran off with the supplies, and we couldn't find him!" the italian and scot both say.
"Seriously?" the boss says.

The boss then approaches the pile of sand, when the chinese man leaps out of it and says "**SUPPLIES!**"


(If you didn't get it, say the last sentence out loud.)

A Soviet Russian food collector and a farmer

A Soviet official in charge of collecting food from farms goes to a local farm and is greatly warmly by the farmer.

After some light hearted conversation, the official says, "Anyways, I am here to collect the potatoes you have grown."

The farmer replies, "Oh, yes. This has been a marvelous year. We have grown so many potatoes, that if we put them all into a pile, it would reach the foot of God."

The official replies, "That is ridiculous. You know that in Soviet Russia, there is no God."

The farmer responds, "That is fine. We have no potatoes either."

So there's this pig that's feeling under the weather.

So there's this pig that's feeling under the weather. He goes to the doctor and is like "Doc, I've been sick all week, you gotta help me." The doctor pauses for a moment, considering options, and finally says "Okay, this is an age old remedy. Here's what I need you to do. Before you go in your mud pile, I want you to fill it with salt and sugar. Then, lay in there like you usually would. Call me in a week and let me know how you feel."

So a week goes by and the pig calls the doctor. "Oh, so how are you feeling," asks the doctor. "Better?"

"Better?" exclaims the pig. "I'm cured!"

What do you call a pile of cats?

A MEOWTAIN.

Told this one at work after two weeks straight of 12+ hours days and laughed so hard I got sent home for the rest of the day to get sleep. To this day, every time I tell it I start giggling uncontrollably... Yep.

What did a pile of sand say to another in sahara

Long time no sea

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall?

Art.

That same guy in your pool? Bob

Same guy in your hot tub? Stew

Sitting under your car that's missing a wheel? Jack

Same guy on your porch? Matt

Same guy getting hit with a baseball bat? Homer

Same guy lying in a pile of leaves? Russel

What do you call a girl with one leg shorter than the other? Eileen

Chinese girl with the same condition? Irene.

Some day in Berlin

Yussel Rabinowitz and his wife Bessie were hiding from the Nazis in a secluded Berlin basement.

One day Yussel decided to get a breath of fresh air, but while out walking he came face to face with Adolf Hitler himself. The German leader pulled out a gun and pointed to a pile of horse-shit in the street.

All right, Jew! he shouted, Eat that or I'll kill you.
Trembling, Yussel did as he was ordered. Hitler began laughing so hard that he dropped his gun.

Yussel grabbed it and said, Now you eat, or I'll shoot!
The fuhrer got down on his hands and knees and began eating. While he was occupied, Yussel sneaked away and ran back to his basement. He slammed the door shut, bolted and locked it securely.

Bessie, Bessie! he shouted. Guess who I had lunch with today!

An engineer tells his coworkers about his walk to work

"So I'm walking to work this morning through the park, like I always do, but today was a bit different... A beautiful woman on a bicycle rode up next to me and got off the bike. She stripped naked and put her clothes in a pile next to the bike, then looked right at me and said 'You can have anything you want...'"

One of his coworkers asks "So what did you do?"

He replies, "I took the bike."

The coworker says "Yeah, you made the right choice.. Her clothes wouldn't have fit you anyway."

Saw a guy betting anyone $50 to see if he could fire a bullet into a pile of cow dung 30 yards away.

I thought to myself, that's kind of a crapshoot.

What does a pile of bricks and a fat chick have in common?

They both probably gonna get laid by some Mexican

Good pickup line.

Two male flies are buzzing around the farmyard when they spot a female fly landing on a fresh pile of cow dung.
The one fly says, "Wow, she is cute! I'm going to try to talk to her, wish me luck."
He swoops down, lands right next to her and says, "Excuse me Miss, is this stool taken?"

The Texan Rancher and the Kentucky Farmer

A Texas Rancher was driving his truck through Kentucky one day when he sees a farmer out tending his field. He pulls over on a whim to talk to the farmer.

"Greetings friend! This looks like a pretty nice farm. How much land do you have?"

The Farmer gestures, "Well you see that river down yonder? My farm stretches from that river to the rock pile over the next hill."

The Rancher replies, "That is a fair bit of land, but back in Texas I've got so much land I can get into my truck at dawn on one edge of it, drive all morning and still not reach the other side by noon."

The Farmer is thoughtful for a moment and says, "You know, I had a truck like that once."

A joke for fall.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves?

Russell.

Dark Jokes?

What's worse than 18 dead babies in a bucket? 1 baby in 18 different buckets.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my Garage.

What do you call a rooster staring at a pile of lettuce?

A chicken sees a salad.

Did you hear about the guy who had sex with his sister in a pile of lemon peels?

It was in zest

Today my 10 year old daughter referred to the pile of dirty laundry that my wife is doing as.

Mount Wash More.

The HR takes the top 20 application folders from the pile and throw it in the trash.

Those people have bad luck. We don't want people with bad luck.

How can you tell if your wife is dead? [NSFW]

The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.



Didn't make this up, credit goes to the morning show I was listening to this morning.

I once got in a fight with a pile of dirt...

The pile of dirt won by a landslide.

Lone Survivor

The rescue team finds the crashed airplane. The lone survivor is chewing on a bone,with a huge pile of bones next to him. The rescuers are shocked. He says "You can't judge me for this, I had to survive." The rescue leader says "But, Christ, man ... your plane went down two days ago!"

Two Russians were walking through the woods...

And they came across a pile of brownish muck.
"Look like dogshit?" asks Commander Igor.
"Ya! Look like dogshit!" answers Ivan.
"Smell it!" commands Igor. Ivan gets down and takes a whiff.
"Smell like dogshit?" asks Igor.
"Ya! Smells like dogshit!"
"Taste it!" growls Igor.
"Huh?" protests Ivan.
"**Taste it!**" yells Igor.
Ivan takes a bit on his finger, puts it in his mouth with a scowl, and spits.
Igor asks "Taste like dogshit?"
"Ya! Tastes like dogshit!"
"Oh!" says Igor. "Must be dogshit!"
"Ya!" agrees Ivan. "Must be dogshit"
Igor says "Good thing we didn't step in it!"

Hello, have one of you guys lost a pile of cash with a rubber band around it?

Because I got the rubberband

A truck filled with 127 penguins breaks down on the highway...

The truck driver flags down a passing car and asks the driver if he'll take the penguins to the zoo. The driver agrees, and the penguins pile into the car.

A couple hours later, the truck is fixed, and the truck driver goes to the zoo to make sure the 127 penguins arrived, but they're nowhere to be found. Frantically, he jumps in his truck and starts looking all over town for them.

Finally, he spots the man and the 127 penguins walking down the street. "Hey! I thought I asked you to take the 127 penguins to the zoo!" he yells. "I did", replies the driver, "I had a little money left over, so I thought I'd take them to a movie too."

What do you call a pile of cats?

A MEOWntain!

Thank you.

What do you call a pile of hamsters in a river?

Hamster-dam.

Your mom is like a pile of bricks.

Constantly getting laid by Mexicans.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman find a magic slide...

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman find a magic slide with a steep drop at the bottom. A notice on the slide tells them that they will be given whatever they say while going down and to use it with caution.

The Englishman goes first and screams "Gooooold". He lands on a pile of gold and badly injures himself but he is content.

The Scotsman thinks then jumps on and shouts "Looooove". He lands safely in the arms of the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

The Irishman who hadn't been paying too much attention is just eager to get on the slide. He dives head first onto the slide, "WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

When employing people, gather all the CVs together and randomly split them into two piles.

Take one pile and throw it in the bin. This stops you employing anyone unlucky.

Fugitive joke

Three fugitives are trying to outrun the cops. They come across a farm, and quickly find places to hide. The first one hides in a pen full of sheep, the second one hides in a pen full of cows, the third one hides in a pile of potatoes.

The cops bust into the farm, and start looking for the fugitives. First they search the sheep pen. The guy hiding there goes "Baaaaaahhhhhh" and the cops say "Just a bunch of sheep here." and move on.

Next, they search the cow pen. The guy hiding among the cows goes "MOOOOOOOO" and the cops say "Just a bunch of cows here." and they move on.

Finally, they come to the pile of potatoes, and look around. The guy hiding under the pile says.

"pooooooootaaaaaaaaatooooooooo....."

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends.

Joko Jokes