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Piano Player Jokes

31 piano player jokes and hilarious piano player puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about piano player that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Piano Player Short Jokes

Short piano player jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The piano player humour may include short piano jokes also.

  1. Lost my job as an old west saloon piano player when a mysterious stranger walked in the door and I just kept playing
  2. What did the accordion player say to the piano player? "You got the keys, but I’ve got the squeeze."
  3. Since professional piano players are called pianist then why aren't race car drivers called racest
  4. If a watchmaker uses Dial and a piano player uses Ivory and a Orange grower uses Zest... ...Does a Bull Fighter use Olay?
  5. What do novice piano players have in common with embedded systems programmers? They both write in C.
  6. A concert promoter was fired for claiming he had the worlds largest piano player booked when he was only 5' 8"... Just another case of a man lying about the size of his pianist.
  7. If a professional piano player is a pianist.. ..then a professional race player is a racist?
    *rap musicians scurrying about*
  8. funny My uncle was a racist piano player, all his work sounded awful because he skipped all the black keys.
  9. I feel bad for Ray Charles about the whole Stevie Wonder thing... I mean another blind black piano player? There's no way he saw that coming.
  10. A piano player is being investigated for assault Good thing he is only A Minor and is able to B Sharp enough to escape the cops.

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Piano Player One Liners

Which piano player one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with piano player? I can suggest the ones about musician and guitar player.

  1. If a piano player is called a pianist Wouldn't a racecar driver be called a racist?
  2. Which piano player is the most predictable poker player? Ben Folds
  3. Spent my night listening to my favorite Greek, new-age piano player Laurel
  4. A piano player died today. The cause of death: o**... failure.

Cheerful Piano Player Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!

What funny jokes about piano player you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean play piano jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make piano player pranks.

A man walks out of a bar...

He realizes he must be drunk after having seen an Irishman, Englishman and a Scotsman drinking together, A horse, 2 chemists (one dead), a piano player, a dog, a monkey, an octopus, 007, an ostrich as well as a befuddled bartender tending to countless men walking into the bar...

A pianist performing in a subway terminal...

was playing beautifully. I was only offput by the weird looking kid with a dunce cap sitting atop the piano.
Suddenly, the weird looking kid with the dunce cap jumped up and scurried off. The piano player abruptly stopped playing.
I asked him, "why did you stop playing?"
To which he replied, "I cannot play piano without my metro-gnome."

A piano player at a bar has a monkey as a sidekick . . .

. . . who collects tips in a tin can. While the piano player was playing, the monkey squatted over a man's glass and dipped his t**... in the drink.
Infuriated, the man yells at the piano player "Do you know your monkey dipped his b**... in my martini ?!!"
The piano player replies "No man, but hum a few bars and I can probably pick it up."

"No forced entry,"

the detective mused. "That means it could only be .... the piano player!"
Everyone gasped and turned towards the mild-mannered entertainer.
"He's the only one who has all the keys!"

My girlfriend and I are having a disagreement.

My girlfriend and I are having a disagreement.
She wants a huge wedding with 500 guests and a piano player… I want us to see other people.

What do you call a love triangle between a drummer, a bassist, and a piano player?

A bad combo

Arabic (Yemeni) joke. Don't mind the translation if it's not accurate

A Yemeni man traveled to Nigeria for work. On the first day he saw a f**.... The men were carrying the body on their heads. On the second day he saw a second f**.... This time they were carrying the body by their fingers, so he asked them why they do this.

They told him we carry the dead according to his/her work. The first was a barber , so we carried him on our heads, and the second was a piano player, so we carried him on our fingers. On the third day, the Yemeni man returned to Yemen because his job was to perform circumcision.

Once Upon a Time in the West, a One-Armed Bear Walks Into a Bar

As he enters, the piano stops playing, the poker players put down their cards, and the room goes silent, except for the ticking of the Grandfather clock in the corner. The bear stands in the doorway a few seconds, surveying the saloon, before walking to the bar. Whiskey, he growls. The bartender slides a shot glass of rotgut down the bar, which the bear snags with his good arm and gulps down. Another, he says. He downs the second whiskey, belches, swivels slowly on his barstool to face the room, and announces, ** Ah'm lookin' fer the man that shot muh paw! **

Once Upon a Time in the West, a Bear Walked into a Saloon..

As he enters, the piano stops playing, the poker players put down their cards, and the room goes silent, except for the ticking of the Grandfather clock in the corner. The bear stands in the doorway a few seconds, surveying the saloon, before walking to the bar. Whiskey, he growls. The bartender slides a shot glass of rotgut down the bar, which the bear snags with his good arm and gulps down. Another, he says. He downs the second whiskey, belches, swivels slowly on his barstool to face the room, and announces, ** Ah'm lookin' fer the man that shot muh paw. **

A One-Armed Bear Walks Into a Saloon..

When he enters, the piano player stops playing, the poker players put down their cards, and the room goes silent. The bear stands in the doorway a few seconds, surveying the saloon, before walking to the bar. Whiskey, he says. The bartender slides a shot glass of rotgut down the bar, which the bear snags with his good arm and gulps down. Another, he says. The bear downs the second whiskey, swivels slowly on his barstool to face the room, and announces, ** I'm lookin' fer the man that shot my paw. **

Another genie joke

So a man walks into a bar with a burlap sack. He pulls out a small piano, bench, and a tiny piano player, who begins to play songs on the miniature piano.
The Bartender, intrigued, asks the man where he got it. The man proceeds to show the bartender an old genie bottle. Out pops an old, dusty genie. The man tells the bartender to make a wish.
The Bartender wishes for 1 million bucks. All of a sudden, Ducks begin shooting out of the top of the bottle. Frustrated the bartender yells to the man "I wished for a million BUCKS not a Million DUCKS!"
To this the man replied, "Yea, and i didn't wish for a 12-inch Pianist Either."

A Koala walks into a bar...

A Koala bear walks into a bar, sits down and orders a BLT sandwich. The Koala eats the BLT sandwich, gets up, spins around, pulls a p**... out of his pouch, shoots the piano player, and proceeds to walk out of the bar. The bartender, in shock, shouts to the Koala, "Hey, who do you think you are, you ate my sandwich and shot my piano player, and just where do you think you're going!?" The Koala replies, "Hey, I'm a Koala. Look it up." The frustrated bartender pulls out a dictionary from behind the bar and looks up Koala: The dictionary said "n. a marsupial that eats shoots and leaves."

Little Piano Player

A man walks into a bar. He looks at the counter and see a tiny man, no more than a foot tall, playing a piano just as small. So the man walks up to the bartender and asks him about the tiny piano player.
The bartender say "I got him from the genie in the mens bathroom"
So the man goes into the bathroom and see a woman inside talking to the genie
"I wish for world peace" she said
Then suddenly the room is flooded with geese. The man walks out of the bathroom and goes back to the bartender.
"I think your genie is a little hard of hearing" he says
"Yeah I know" the bartender replies "Do you really think I would wish for a 12 inch pianist"