JokoJokes

Piano Jokes

178 piano jokes and hilarious piano puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about piano that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Laugh your way through these witty jokes by famous pianist Victor Borge. Enjoy a good chuckle with musical puns and one liners about playing the piano, clarinet, and minor chords. Have a good time with some of these amazing piano jokes.

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Funniest Piano Short Jokes

Short piano jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The piano humour may include short guitar jokes also.

  1. What's the difference between tuna, glue and a piano? You can tuna piano but you can't piano tuna!
  2. My wife said we needed to childproof our upright piano, so it wouldn't fall over on our toddler... ... I said that was a good idea, because I wouldn't want a flat minor.
  3. Guys walks into a piano shop and asks the shop keeper for a wasp! The store keeper says sir. We are a piano shop. We don't sell wasps . The guys says. Then why have you got some in the window?
  4. Why does helen keller play piano with only one hand? Because she uses the other one to sing
  5. Lost my job as an old west saloon piano player when a mysterious stranger walked in the door and I just kept playing
  6. I played "My Heart Will Go On" on a public piano and people yelled at me. Can't wait till this cruise is over.
  7. When I was a kid I figured out how to play the piano by ear. After a while I learned that it was easier to use my fingers.
  8. when i die I want it to be from being hit by a falling piano That way my life ends on a dramatic note.
  9. What's the difference between a piano, a fish, and a bucket of glue? You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish.
  10. Doctor will I be able to play piano after the procedure? Doctor: Yes, I don't see why not.
    Patient: That's wonderful I could never play piano before!

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Piano One Liners

Which piano one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with piano? I can suggest the ones about musical instrument and music instruments.

  1. What do you get if you drop a piano down a mineshaft? A flat minor
  2. What would happen if a piano fell on top of you? You'd b-flat.
  3. What do you get if you drop a piano down a mine shaft? A flat miner
  4. Playing the piano is like living. I gave up on piano at 7 years old.
  5. What do you get if you drop a piano on a military base? A flat major.
  6. If a piano player is called a pianist Wouldn't a racecar driver be called a racist?
  7. What chord does a piano make when it drops on a child? ...A-flat minor
  8. What'll happen if a piano is dropped on a man? He will B flat
  9. What is Roy Moore's favorite piano key? A minor
  10. What do you call it when a piano falls on a kids head? A flat minor
  11. What do you get when you drop a piano down a mineshaft? A♭m
  12. How did the catholic priest play the piano? In A minor.
  13. What do you call a snowman that can play the piano? Frosty the Snowpianist!
  14. Why did Helen Keller play the piano with one hand? So she could sing with the other.
  15. Did you hear about the Piano Teacher that slept with his student? She was A Minor.

Play Piano Jokes

Here is a list of funny play piano jokes and even better play piano puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What do you call an accordion teacher who can play both the piano and the accordion? A halfWit.
  • A man broke the Guinness World Record by playing the same piano key 1,000 times in 1 minute He then went home and broke the world record for most satisfied girlfriend.
  • A man broke his hand. He asked the doctor, "Will I be able to play piano as soon as the cast comes off?"
    "Of course!" said the doctor.
    The man replied, "Great. I never could before."
  • When I was little, I wanted to play the piano really badly. Now that I'm older, I can now play the piano really badly.
  • Have you heard of the piano-playing spy? Neither have I. He's very low-key.
  • What's R. Kelly's favorite chord to play on the piano? A Minor
  • What kind of cheese plays the piano? Mozart-rella!
  • What's Darth Vader's stage name when he plays his electric piano? The synth lord
  • Why Can't Thor play Piano? He hates playing the Lokis.
    (I know it's bad plus it's better read out loud)
  • Why couldn't bach play the piano? It was baroque

Piano Key Jokes

Here is a list of funny piano key jokes and even better piano key puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What did the accordion player say to the piano player? "You got the keys, but I’ve got the squeeze."
  • I paid a fish to come over to re-key my guitar, piano and drums. He was a professional tuna.
  • During my piano recital, some of the black keys stopped working. It was a flat out disaster.
  • What is the biggest key when moving a piano up a flight of stairs? Be sharp or Be flat.
  • I saw a Norse god discreetly playing 49Hz notes on a piano in space... I thought to myself: "What a low G low G low key low key Loki."
  • If you drop a piano down a mineshaft, what in what key will it play when it lands? A flat minor.
  • In what key do ghosts play the piano? In the spoo-key.
  • I can't believe I was late to my own piano recital. I just couldn't find my keys
  • Why cant you open a piano ? because the keys are inside
  • Where did the music teacher leave her keys? In the piano!
Piano joke, Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

Piano Keys Jokes

Here is a list of funny piano keys jokes and even better piano keys puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why didn't the guitar drive to the store? Because the piano had the keys
  • I had to move my new piano up 5 flights of stairs to my apartment but, as soon as I got to the door, I remembered something I forgot the Keys
  • I heard it took at least two elephants to make the keys on my antique piano I had no idea they were capable of such delicate work.
  • Why is a piano so hard to open? The keys are on the inside
  • What did the millennial say when his friend played jaws on the piano? That low key gave me chills
  • funny My uncle was a racist piano player, all his work sounded awful because he skipped all the black keys.
  • Why couldn't the broken piano get in it's house? It didn't have any keys.
  • What's the most commonly stolen musical instrument? A piano. People are always leaving the keys in them.
  • What was Michael Jackson favourite piano key? A Minor
  • Seven piano keys walked into a bar. The bartender said, "Sorry, we cannot serve alcohol to A Minor."

Piano Player Jokes

Here is a list of funny piano player jokes and even better piano player puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Since professional piano players are called pianist then why aren't race car drivers called racest
  • If a watchmaker uses Dial and a piano player uses Ivory and a Orange grower uses Zest... ...Does a Bull Fighter use Olay?
  • What do novice piano players have in common with embedded systems programmers? They both write in C.
  • A concert promoter was fired for claiming he had the worlds largest piano player booked when he was only 5' 8"... Just another case of a man lying about the size of his pianist.
  • If a professional piano player is a pianist.. ..then a professional race player is a racist?
    *rap musicians scurrying about*
  • I feel bad for Ray Charles about the whole Stevie Wonder thing... I mean another blind black piano player? There's no way he saw that coming.
  • A piano player is being investigated for assault Good thing he is only A Minor and is able to B Sharp enough to escape the cops.
  • My girlfriend and I are having a disagreement. My girlfriend and I are having a disagreement.
    She wants a huge wedding with 500 guests and a piano player… I want us to see other people.
  • Which piano player is the most predictable poker player? Ben Folds
  • Spent my night listening to my favorite Greek, new-age piano player Laurel
Piano joke, Spent my night listening to my favorite Greek, new-age piano player

Amusing & Witty Piano Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun

What funny jokes about piano you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean saxophone jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make piano pranks.

my pre school guitar teacher...

got in trouble for f**... A minor, but he wasn't as bad as bad as my pre school violin teacher...he fiddled with kids... but both were not nearly as bad as my pre school piano teacher....who r**... me in the mouth

Two gay guys live together

The first guy says, "Let's play hide-and-seek. I'll hide, and if you find me I'll blow you."
The second guys says, "What if I can't find you?"
He says, "I'll be behind the piano."

Musical Contradiction

Piano is my forte.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano?

Neither has he.

Genie with a flaw

A guy walks into a bar. He sets a bag onto the bar, orders three shots of whiskey, and slams them all back.
The bartender asks, "Hey buddy, what's the problem?"
The guy reaches into the bag, pulls out a little piano, then set it on the bar. He reaches back inside, pulls out a little stool, and sets it in front of the piano. He reaches in one more time, pulls out a little man, and sits him on the stool. The man then proceeds to play a wonderful sonata that fills the establishment and leaves the patrons in awe.
"Wow, that was great!" exclaimed the bartender. "Where'd you find this guy?"
The man reaches into the bag one last time and pulls out a lamp. He hands it to the bartender and says "Rub it."
The bartender rubs the lamp and a genie pops out. The genie says "I shall grant you one wish, whatever your heart desires."
"I want a million bucks!" the bartender shouts.
"It shall be done." And the genie disappears.
A minute later, a duck walks into the bar. And then another duck, and then another. Soon the bar is full of ducks.
"Hey buddy," the bartender says to the man. "I think your genie is a little deaf. I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks."
"Yeah," said the man. "Do you think I really asked for a twelve-inch pianist?"

Confucius say, piano falls down mineshaft...

Get tone of A Flat Miner.

A man is going in for surgery...

And right as he's about to go under, he asks the doctor: "Doc, will I be able to play piano after this?" The doctor says, "Of course you will, this surgery is just on your knee. Why do you ask?" The man replies, "Well I don't play at the moment, but I've always wanted an easy way to do it."

A man goes to a psychiatrist and says "Doctor, you gotta help me, my wife thinks she's a piano..."

The doc replies, "Well, bring her in and I'll see what I can do."
The man says, "Are you nuts!? Do you know how much it costs to move a piano??"

What is Michael Jackson's favorite piano chord?

A-minor

What's the difference between...

Requires the receivers input so I will just tell the full joke. It's given me quite a bit of laughs and sighs so I thought I would share it!
What's the difference between a tuna, a piano and a bathtub full of glue?
"I dont know!"
Well you can tuna a piano, but you can't piano a tuna!
"What about the bathtub of glue?"
I thought you might get stuck on that one!

What's the difference...

...between a piano, a fish, and glue?
You can tune a piano but you can't tuna fish
"What about the glue?"
I knew you'd get stuck on that.

What does a piano, a tuna and glue have in common?

You can tuna piano but can't piano a tuna

Plato and Aristotle were in the music room of the Academy in Athens.

Plato was at the piano, and Aristotle was holding a small lute in his hands.
Plato, do you know the unpredictability and exactitude of ethics and reflective philosophical hermeneutics require phronesis as an ontological counterpoint to peripatetic conjecture?
No, Plato replied. But if you play a few bars, I may be able to pick it up.

I heard that elton john was pretty good on the piano

but apparently he s**... on the o**....

Whats the difference between a piano a can of tuna and a bucket of glue...

You can tuna piano but you can't piano a tuna
(Random person) "what about the bucket of glue?"
(You) "I knew you would get stuck on that"

Whats better than roses on a piano?

tulips on an o**......

What's better than roses on your piano?

Two lips on your o**....

My drivers license says I'm an o**... donor,

but jokes on them because I own a piano.

Why was the piano teacher arrested?

He kept f**... A minor.

What do you get when you push a piano out of the second floor window of an elementary school?

A flat minor.

Why does Elton John play the piano?

Because he s**... on an o**....

What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A flat major.

What's better than roses on a piano?

Tulips on my o**...
My dad told me this joke when I was 5, I finally understood it 19 years later. Hope it doesn't take you that long

What do you call a Jewish piano?

A cash register.

My father got crushed by a falling piano.

His f**... was very low key.

A man walks out of a bar...

He realizes he must be drunk after having seen an Irishman, Englishman and a Scotsman drinking together, A horse, 2 chemists (one dead), a piano player, a dog, a monkey, an octopus, 007, an ostrich as well as a befuddled bartender tending to countless men walking into the bar...

Did you hear about child m**... who plays the piano?

He was f**... a minor

If you show me a piano falling down a mine shaft...

I'll show you Aflat minor.

What's sexier than roses on a piano?

Tulips on an o**...!

Two guys are delivering a piano...

.... on the 10th floor of a walk-up building. On the 9th floor they rest for one final time.
Guy in the front: "Dude, I got good news and bad news"
Guy in the back: "Tell me the bad news first."
Guy in the front: "We're in the wrong building."
Guy in the back: "And the good news?"
Guy in the front: "We only have one more floor to go."

A man walks into a bar...

A man walks into a bar, orders a beer, walks over to the piano, and sets his beer down on it. The piano man's monkey climbs over and pees directly into the glass of beer. The man says
"Hey, do you know your monkey peed in my glass?!?"
The piano man says
"No, but if you hum a few bars, I'll play it for you."

A grade school teacher asks her students what their parents do for a living.

Billy proudly stands up and announces, "My daddy plays piano in a w**...."
The teacher is aghast and promptly changes the subject. Later that day, she calls Billy's mother and explains what Billy said.
Billy's mother says, "Actually, his father's an attorney, but how can we explain a thing like that to a seven-year-old?"

What kind of piano songs does the Nike CEO play?

Just duets

What's the difference between a Piano, a Tuna, and a tub of Glue?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna. As for the glue... well I knew you'd get stuck on that one.
This joke might seem a little fishy, but I find it key to tell a joke that can really stick with people.

A man is going to the hospital for an operation...

He asks the doctor: "Doc, will I be able to play the piano after my operation?"
The doctor says yes.
He then says:"That's good! I couldn't before."

What's worse than a lobster on your piano?

**c**... on your o**....**

What the difference between playing a piano and dropping a piano?

One sounds like Thelonius Monk, and the other sounds like a melodious "thunk!".

I just fell victim to a dad joke

Dad: What do you get when you cross a tuna, a piano, and glue.
Me: I don't know?
Dad: You can tuna piano but you can't piano a tuna.
Me: What about the glue?
Dad: I knew you would get stuck on that part.

A foolish man gives his wife a grand piano...

... A wise man gives his wife an upright o**....

Some people enjoy roses on their piano....

.... but I prefer two lips on my o**....

When a musician's fingers move really fast across a piano, they're considered a prodigy and a genius.

But when i go even faster on full-screen rhythm games on my iPad, I'm "lazy", "going to get carpal tunnel syndrome", "unproductive", and "ruining the f**..., Emily".

The doorbell rang and the lady of the house discovered a workman, complete with tool chest, on the front door.

Lady, he announced, I'm the piano tuner.
The lady exclaimed, Why, I didn't send for a piano tuner.
The man replied, I know, but our neighbors did.

Why is someone who plays the piano called a pianist...

... but a person who drives race cars not called a racist?

What do you get if you drop a piano on an army base?

A flat major.
What do you get if you drop a piano down a mineshaft?
A flat minor.
What do you get if you drop a piano on a beehive?
B flat.
What do you get if you drop a piano on a Morris Marina?
An episode of Top Gear.

I'm OK at guitar

but I can't pick up the piano.

What's more romantic than roses on a piano?

Tulips on an o**....

A pianist performing in a subway terminal...

was playing beautifully. I was only offput by the weird looking kid with a dunce cap sitting atop the piano.
Suddenly, the weird looking kid with the dunce cap jumped up and scurried off. The piano player abruptly stopped playing.
I asked him, "why did you stop playing?"
To which he replied, "I cannot play piano without my metro-gnome."

It's a medical miracle

A man is recovering from surgery after a car c**..., and he notices that both his hands are covered in casts. When a nurse comes to check on him, he asks "Will I be able to play piano after this?"
"Yes, the casts should come off in a few weeks, then you should be able to play."
"That's funny, I couldn't play piano before the accident."

If you were crushed by a piano...

Would you B-flat?

What's the difference between a piano, a fish, and a bucket of glue?

You can tune a piano but you can't tune a fish.
 
What about the bucket of glue, you ask?
 
 
I knew you'd get stuck on that part.

Why can't Bach buy a piano

Because he is Baroque

How is a piano like a stick shift?

They both have three pedals, and most people only know what two of them do.

You know you spend too much time sitting, playing piano...

...when your Bach hurts

So I hear Elton John is very good at the piano.

But he s**... on the o**....

My grandfather died after being crushed by a piano

His f**... was very low key

Piano joke, My grandfather died after being crushed by a piano

jokes about piano