Physics Professor Jokes
32 physics professor jokes and hilarious physics professor puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about physics professor that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Physics Professor Short Jokes
Short physics professor jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The physics professor humour may include short chemistry professor jokes also.
- At the end of the physics lecture, I asked my professor, Can you tell me what happened before The Big Bang? The professor replied, Sorry. No Time.
- A physics student asked her professor to describe what happened right before the Big Bang... ....but the professor couldn't, because there was no time.
- What is the difference between a maths professor and a physics professor? You can get mathematical with the maths professor.
- This popped into my head in class the other day... Why do professors like stats and physics students?
Because they'll work for p naughts. - What did the Physics professor say to the fat kid in school? "You've got a lot of potential!"
- My old physics professor: Times flies when you're having fun, Or as frogs say, times fun when you're having flies...
That was a long semester - –Professor, please tell us about discrete physical values in quantum mechanics. –Sure, one moment.
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Physics Professor One Liners
Which physics professor one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with physics professor? I can suggest the ones about physics teacher and physicist.
- How Long is a battleship. True or false? False. How Long is a man from China.
- Why do physics professors prefer overweight students? They have greater potential.
- Physics student asks to go to bathroom Professor asks "Liquid, Solid or Gas"
- when professor starts lecturing on first day of intro physics Can we0
- How did Professor Duck explain particle physics to his class? Quark quark.
- Two quantum mechanics professors had s**... They must have had physical chemistry.
- Why did the classical physics professor lose his job? He s**... at his work.
Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Physics Professor Jokes with Friends.
What funny jokes about physics professor you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean physicist mathematician jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make physics professor pranks.
I got caught cheating on my physics exam. Furious, my professor said to me "I hope you understand the gravity of the situation".
But if I had known that, I wouldn't be in this situation in the first place.
At a frat party, a young man fell off the balcony and tragically passed away
His physics professor came to give a eulogy. He said He was such a brilliant student. Right at the end of his life, he had so much potential.
My physics professor fails any student turning in a report without a blue coversheet
After working on my report all night, I accidentally used a white coversheet in a sleepless stupor. When I got to class the next morning, I panicked and threw the report at him at close to the speed of light!
I got a B+
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A college student slowly walks into a bar and orders a beer. He starts talking to the bartender.
"What a day. Our physics professor has to be one of the most difficult professors on the campus." The student complains. "If she wasn't so drop dead gorgeous I would've dropped the class already." The bartender looks at him and says "So you could say she's easy on the eyes, but hard on the pupils?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him.
Why do we have to learn this stuff?" The young man blurted out.
"To save lives," the professor responded before continuing the lecture.
A few minutes later the student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?"
The professor stared at the student for a long time. "Physics saves lives," he said, "because it keeps the idiots out of medical school."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept.
A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask "Why do we have to learn this stuff?"
"To save lives." The professor responded quickly and continued the lecture.
A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted.
"It keeps the ignoramuses out of medical school," replied the professor.
Sometimes I wish that I was a physics Professor named Albert
Sometimes I wish that I was a physics Professor named Albert and that occasional situations would arise where somebody would come fetch me for consultation. I would burst into the room wearing a terry aerobics headband and exclaim, "did somebody say let's get physics Al?
A physics professor and his assistant...
A physics professor and his assistant are working on liberating negatively-charged hydroxyl ions, when all of a sudden, the assistant says, "Wait, professor, what if the salicylic acids do not accept the hydroxyl ions?" And the professor responds, "That's no hydroxyl ion; that's my wife!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class
A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him."Why do we have to learn this stuff?" the frustrated student blurted out."To save lives," the professor responded before continuing the lecture.A few minutes later the student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?"The professor stared at the student without saying a word. "Physics saves lives," he finally continued, "because it keeps the idiots out of medical school."
A physicist, mathematician and a priest are trapped in a burning Skyscraper...
On the ground is a huge swimmingpool. Their only chance to survive is to jump into it. The Priest looks at it, prays for 20 min. says "God will help me" jumps, misses and dies.
The physician looks down, approximates some values, writes down some constants and makes a small experiment, calculates 5 min. says "I hope I remembered the constants well enough", jumps and lands safely in the pool.
The mathematician takes out his notebook and in an attempt to come up with a general solution and its proof, spends 2h writing furiously. "This has to work", he says, jumps and flies upwards in a steep curve. He made a sign error.
(Joke from our Physics professor, the room was dying laughing. I hope I didnt screw up too badly translating this from german, have mercy)
Joke my math professor told me today.
A man and his wife are having trouble with their marriage. They fight all the time and they have been continually becoming less physical. The man decides to visit his pastor on the subject. To which the minister proclaims, "You have to do something nice to attract her." The man responds, "Are you sure this will work?" and the pastor persists, "Yes, just do something nice to attract her, it will work I promise." And so the man goes home to get ready. Hours later, the wife comes home to find her husband with candles lit, and her husband slowly waxing his John Deere in the kitchen. She screams, "What are you doing?!" to which he replies "IM SAVING OUR MARRIAGE MARCIA! Pastor told me to do something nice to a tractor."