phonebook Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious phonebook puns

A Blonde Walks into a Library

A blonde walks into a library and slams a book on the desk.

She says, "This is the worst book I've ever read!! There's no plot and it has way too many characters!!"

The librarian says, "So that's what happened to our phonebook."


A broke, lonely man.

A man who hadn't been with a woman in years was feeling lonely one night. He finally decided he wanted to hire an escort to fix this problem, but, he was nearly broke.

After sifting through the phone-book he finds an ad for an extremely cheap escort, only $5. He calls her up and hires her. A few hours later she appears at his house and they spend the night together in his bed.

The next day after she had left he noticed that he was really itchy. After checking the boys he realized he had crabs! Enraged, he called the escort again and demanded a refund, to which she replied, "Well what did you expect for $5, lobsters?"


How to rob a bank

I'm going to go rob a bank tomorrow. I plan on dressing up in a clown wig and make up and only wearing a thong and nipple tassels. I'll carry a goat and a can of fluorescent paint in one arm and, while in the bank, I'm going to fuck the goat and throw the paint over the walls, all the time ripping up pages of a phonebook and swearing my head off. After getting the money, I'll take a shit on the floor and piss everywhere. I then will escape in a van shaped like a giant pink cock.

Let's see America's most wanted fucking stage a reconstruction of that.


If you're ever extremely lost, stay where you are and build a house instead of trying to find your way out...

Within a couple of days there should be a phonebook you didn't ask for at your doorstep, which will probably have a map in it.

If not, it makes good kindling.


Cannibal restaurant

I went to a cannibal restaurant once, I asked for the menu and they gave me a phonebook...


The Chinese Phonebook

China decided to make their own version of the Yellow Pages, but with all the Wings and Wongs, and Chans it was a mess. Finally they had decided to cancel the project people would Wing the Wong numbers.


Yo momma so fat

she has more chins than a chinese phonebook


Yo mama is so fat, she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook


Why were the racist oranges upset when they checked out the small phonebook of their new city?

Because it was mini apple list.


"Yo mama's so fat...

...she got more chins than an Asian phonebook"


What are the most funny Phonebook jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Phonebook? Well, here are the best Phonebook dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Phonebook pick up lines to share with friends.


Joko Jokes