Period Jokes

149 period jokes and hilarious period puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about period that are clean and suitable for kids and friends. We've covered all the best period pain jokes, period blood jokes, period cramp jokes.

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jokes about period

Best Short Period Jokes

Short period puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The period humour may include short phase jokes also.

  1. My girlfriend said to me the other day, "Why did God give women periods with cramp pains, and men nothing?" I laughed and replied, "Don't be silly, he gave us women."
  2. Today, me and my wife had a .69 It would have been a hundred times better without the period.
  3. What is the difference between a feminist and a hockey player? A hockey player showers after three periods!^I^will^see^myself^out^now
  4. My girlfriend said period jokes aren't funny... So I ended up throwing away 3 pages of jokes i had written about the Victorian era.
  5. If woman had apostrophes instead of periods, they'd be even more possessive and prone to contractions.
  6. What's the Difference between NHL Players and the jersey shore Girls? NHL Players shower after three periods.
  7. I wish life was more like hockey... Who doesn't want a horn to sound when their period ends?
  8. What's the similarity between semicolons and pregnancies? Both mean you won't be seeing a period for a little while.
  9. Why do women's prisons give out tampons on release day? Because all sentences should end with a period.
  10. My girlfriend said she hates being on her period. I told her it was better than being in a comma.
Period joke, My girlfriend said she hates being on her period.

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about period can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of period puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Period One Liners

Which period one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with period? I can suggest the ones about cycle and season.

  1. Why is 6.9 the worst number? It's a 69 interrupted by a period
  2. What happens when you finger a gypsy on her period? You get your palm red.
  3. International women's day should not be used as an excuse for sexist jokes Period.
  4. What's a 6.9? A great thing ruined by a period.
  5. Imagine if instead of periods, women had apostrophes They'd be even more possessive.
  6. Why don't Jewish girls study on their period? Concentration Cramps
  7. What is a 6.9? A good thing ruined by a period.
  8. International womens day is not an excuse for low effort sexist jokes. Period.
  9. What's a 6.9? A good time ruined by a period.
  10. I named my son Gram It's short for Grammar because he was supposed to be a period.
  11. Women's hockey is the most dangerous sport... Twelve women, three periods each.
  12. 6.9 A good time interrupted by a period
  13. I took my wife to a movie about a girl hitting puberty It was a period piece
  14. Tampax has been protecting women for 80 years. That's quite a long period.
  15. How often do scientists check the element table? Periodically...

Women Period Jokes

Here is a list of funny women period jokes and even better women period puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Most serial killers are men. That's because women prefer to kill just one man, over a period of many, many years.
  • Why won't women ever play in the NHL? Because the periods would take too long.
  • What if, instead of periods, women had apostrophes? They would be more possessive and have more frequent contractions!
  • They are making a TV series about the struggles of menstruating women over the years. It is a period drama.
  • Why do Canadian women use hockey pucks instead of tampons? Because they last for 3 periods.
  • And God Said: Let there be men
    Let there be women.
    but he only gave women the period
  • I was at a hockey game yesterday and I came up with this horrible joke. Why are women bad luck at hockey games? Because they never have good periods.
  • When do women in prison get their period? At the end of their sentence.
  • Women shouldn't have to be in prison for more than a month. Because their period should be the end of their sentence.
  • Why don't women stay long in prison? As soon as they have their period they are let out.
    Everyone knows a period comes at the end of a sentence.

Girl Period Jokes

Here is a list of funny girl period jokes and even better girl period puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I once went down on a girl without knowing she was on her period Boy was my face red.
  • What do you call a girl who is laughing on her period? A happy cramper.
  • Whats the difference between hockey players and hippie girls? Hockey players shower after 3 periods
  • Imagine if picasso was a girl... Do you think she would have had blue periods?
  • Why can't girls play hockey? Their pads can't last three periods
  • How do you know if a girl is on her period? Shut up!
  • What happened to the girl that had her period while giving a speech? She got a standing ovulation
  • Why was the girl in such a bad mood when she got out of jail? She had a period at the end of her sentence.
  • Three girls were waiting for their periods ...
  • What's the difference between a Toronto Maple Leafs fan and a 14-year old girl? Nothing. They are both just waiting for the first period to be over.

Tampon Period Jokes

Here is a list of funny tampon period jokes and even better tampon period puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I just finished decorating my xmas tree with tampons. For the Christmas period.
  • Tampax has announced that they will be taking the string off tampons and replacing it with tinsel. This is for the Christmas period only.
  • Why do archaeologists collect used tampons? They like to figure out what period they came from..
  • I was asked to draw tampons throughout the ages but I wonder... Do they have to be period accurate?
  • There should be a football team called the Tampons... ...of course, they would only be good for one period and they would have no second string.
  • A weather girl walks into a chemist And buys an umbrella, a pair of sunglasses and a box of tampons.
    She was expecting rain with sunny periods that day
  • I asked a pharmacist "do you stock multicoloured tampons?" "Not since Brexit, they were made for brighter periods."
  • Did you see that movie about tampons? It's a period piece.
  • They were selling tampons with tinsel on at the shop today... ... they were for the Christmas period.
  • What do tampons and renaissance art have in common? You get upset when your dog tears up either of them because they are period pieces.

Missed Period Jokes

Here is a list of funny missed period jokes and even better missed period puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What kind of secretary is the best secretary? One that never misses a period.
  • How do you identify a pregnant clause when editing writing? It's missing a period.
  • What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing? Au revoir.
  • My girlfriend wrote a perfect paragraph... ...she didn't miss a period!
  • Please practice safe text. Use a comma & you won't miss a period.
  • Copy-editing is a very stressful line of work for women. Every time they miss a period, they get really nervous.
  • How did the english teacher know his student was pregnant? She started missing periods
  • Rosa Mr. U, 2 da wedding? Rosa missed her period, you coming to the wedding...old Italian joke my mom told me
  • What's the worst period in a teenage boy's life? The one his girlfriend misses.
  • Why did the semicolon think the comma was pregnant? It was missing it's period.

Period Pain Jokes

Here is a list of funny period pain jokes and even better period pain puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Men will never experience the pain of a period Because the closest we'll ever get is a coma.
  • God said to Eve: "I will make your pains in childbearing very severe;" Clever as she was, she asked, "You mind if I pay in periods?"
  • I told my boss I won't be coming. He said, "Why?"
    I said, "Period pains."
    He said, "You're a guy..."
    I said, "I know, but my girlfriend won't stop screaming."
  • (Misogynist Joke #4) - My girlfriend complains about how painful her period cramps are... I reminded her that's her fault for being a woman.
  • (Misogyny Joke) My girlfriend was complaining about having "painful period cramps" I told her it was her fault for being a woman.

  • My overdramatic girlfriend came up to me, balling her eyes out and confessed to having the most painful period she's ever had before I looked her right in the face and said "stop o**... acting"
Period joke, My overdramatic girlfriend came up to me, balling her eyes out and confessed to having the most pain

Amusing & Witty Period Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun

What funny jokes about period you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean pace jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make period prank.

I told my girlfriend we can either have s**..., or go see Star Wars.

She said "I'm on my period and star wars is sold out," but she pulled some strings and got me in.

There's no need for women to behave the way they do on their period

It's an o**... action

I had s**... with a g**... her period once

Her dad walked in and caught me red-handed.

Mental institution

There's a mental institution, and they are having a
patient evaluation, to see if any patients need to be there
any longer. The doctor then goes around questioning the top three candidates.
He goes to the first patient and asks him , "What is 3 times 3?"
After an hour of scratching his head, and with a confused look on his face he replies, "Two-hundred!".
"That is incorrect." The doctor responds.
He then asks the next patient."What is 3 multiplied by 3?" After a long period of time the patient
responds, "Thursday!". "That is incorrect replies the doctor.

He then goes to the next patient and asks him, "What is 3 times 3?"
The patient quickly responds, "Nine!". The doctor then says "Correct!,
how did you figure that out?" The patient then responds, "I multiplied, 200 by Thursday and then
I added three!"

I wanted to have s**... with my girlfriend, but she was on her period...

so I had to pull some strings.

What do Smurfette and Picasso have in common?

A blue period.

I have high cholesterol, so my doctor has me on the "period" diet

One egg a month

A Halloween Limerick

A lady vampire named Mable
Had a period that was awfully stable.
So once a full moon
She took out her spoon
And drank herself under the table.

What's another name for the Periodic Table of elements?

The atoms family.

What is 6.9?

Good s**... interupted by a period

What do you call it when a girl throws a tantrum during her period?

An o**...-action.

What do women and grammar n**... have in common?

One missed period is enough to freak them out.

What's the best thing about f**... a gypsy on her period?

You get your palm red for free.

Childish but made me laugh

How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Show him a used t**... and ask, "What period is this from?"

How do two l**... pass their time when on their period?

Finger painting.

Why are females so moody when they're on their period?

It's an o**... action.

TIL there was a dinosaur that had three butts.

It was from the Triassic period.

My wife always freaks out when she's on her period

Keep having to tell her to stop o**... acting.

It's show and tell day...

In kindergarten class, and its Johnny's turn. He goes up to the board and puts a dot.
"What's that, Johnny?" The teacher asks.
"It's a period," replies Johnny.
"What's so special about a period Johnny?" she asks.
"I have no idea, but my sister missed one, so my dad starting yelling, mom started crying, and the guy next door shot himself."

Wife says "sorry I have my period".

I said "that's ok honey, that's what the colon is for"!

I've just bought a house with period features

She hates that nickname.

Archeologists in South Africa have just discoved what they think is the oldest t**... ever found

They are trying to find out what period it came from

A French Girl gets her Period

My friend's family is French.
His sister had this huge French flag for a bed sheet.
Then one night she got her period.
Imagine her shock when she woke up on the Japanese Flag.

m**... is NOT a laughing matter.


Female m**...

My woman told me that she would never play with her self when she was on her period. .
But I caught her red handed !!

What's 6.9?

A perfectly good 69 ruined by a period

How do you troll an archaeologist?

Give him a used t**... and ask which period it's from.

My 16 year old cousin Mary finally got her period today.

So, that was a tense couple of years for me.

Do you know what a 6.9 is?

A good thing s**... up by a period.

Only three things are infinite

The universe, human stupidity, and the winrar trial period.

What's the best part about f**......

What's the best part of f**... a psychic while she's on her period?
You still get your palm red

Today my mom saw me f**... myself on my period...

I guess you could say she caught me red-handed.

Whats a prisoners favorite punctuation mark?

Because it marks the end of a sentence.

What is a 6.9

Another amazing thing ruined by a period

What did the Vampire say to the Teacher?

See you next period.
(Heard this 20 years ago, hope it's not overly recycled)

Little Johnny was learning about punctuation

The teacher was explaining all of the different punctuation marks.
She listed the comma, question mark and when she got to period; Little Johnny raised his hand.
He asked: Why are periods so important?
The teacher responded: Well, they are a fundamental part of the written language; why do you ask?
Little Johnny replied: Yesterday my sister said she missed a period and my Mom fainted, my Dad started yelling and the next door neighbor shot himself

I told my girlfriend we can either have s**..., or I'm leaving to watch Guardians Of The Galaxy.

She said "I'm on my period and Guardians Of The Galaxy is sold out!"
I said, "It's alright, I'll just sneak in through the rear entrance."

What do you call the number 6.9?

Great s**... interrupted by a period.

My wife said to me the other day "For the last time I am on my period and I am NOT getting into the water to swim!"

She totally ruined my shark fishing trip.

A plumber fixes a damaged pipe in a doctor's house and asks for 200 dollars. Doctor says to him: "Even i, don't make so much money in such a short period and i'm a doctor".

And the plumber goes: "I know sir. I used to be a doctor myself"

Another interview joke

During a job interview, the interviewer asks, I noticed a 6 year gap in your resume. How do you account for this period of time?
The applicant responds, I went to Yale.
Excited, the interviewer says, Yale?!? You're hired!
The applicant replies, Yay! I got a yob!

Whys was the internet so obsessed with the song "Cotton-Eyed Joe" for a short period of time?

I mean, where did it come from where did it go?

A period at the end of a sentence can make a big difference

Ginny is drinking her coffee
Ginny is drinking her period

What's a 6.9?

A good time interrupted by a period.

God is talking to one of his angels and says

Do you know what I have just done? I have just created a 24-hour period of alternating light and darkness on Earth. Isn't that good?
The angel says, Yes, but what will you do now?
God says, I think I'll call it a day.

How do you embarrass an archeologist?

Hand him a used t**... and ask which period it's from.

Can we please stop doing women specific jokes, especially about m**...?

They aren't funny, period.

Jokes about female b**... functions are not funny.


Tim decided to tie the knot with his long time girlfriend.

One evening, after the honeymoon, he was organizing his golfing equipment. His wife was standing nearby watching him.
After a long period of silence she finally speaks: "Tim, I've been thinking, now that we're married maybe it's time you quit golfing. You spend so much time on the course. You could probably get a good price for your clubs."
Tim gets this horrified look on his face.
She says, "Darling, what's wrong?"
"For a minute there you were beginning to sound like my ex-wife."
"Ex-wife!" she screams, "I didn't know you were married before!"
"I wasn't," he replied.

I told my wife we can have s**... or go see Star Wars, she said, I'm on my period and Star Wars is sold out.

But she pulled some strings and got me in..

How do you p**... off a female archaeologist?

Give her a used t**... and ask her what period it came from.

6.9 is my worst and least favorite number

That is because it is 69 that was ruined by a period

Do you know what a 6.9 is?

It's a good time ruined by a period.

I was carbon-dating a dinosaur the other day, trying to figure out what era it was from

Upon closer inspection, I realised that it didn't have the 3 anuses I was expecting, so I ruled out the Triassic period

Boat rental manager over loudspeaker: boat number 81, your two hour rental period is up, please return to the dock.

Boat rental intern to manager: uh, sir, we only have 60 boats.
Boat rental manager over loudspeaker: boat number 18, do you require assistance?

Archeologists have just discovered the oldest known t**....

They just dont know what period it's from.

Periodic table jokes are the best.

But only when I'm in my element.

Netflix is releasing a movie about the inventor of the t**...

It's a period piece

Why did the movie studio cancel the film about m**...?

They wanted to move away from period pieces.

Dinosaur Fact

Towards the end of the Jurassic period, the Thesaurus was the first Dinosaur to become extinct, obsolete, belated, vanished and wiped out.

Period joke, Dinosaur Fact

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these period jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.