performer Jokes

funny jokes and hilarious performer stories

What are the best Performer puns and pranks?

Did you ever wanted to prank someone about Performer? Well here is a complete list of Performer to have fun with:

Street Performance

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching a street performer do some excellent juggling. The juggler notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands up on a large wooden box and calls out, "Can you all see me now?"
"Yes."
"Oui."
"SΓ­."
"Ja."

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an Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German

were watching an excellent street performer juggling. The street performing noticed the four gentlemens were having trouble seeing him, so he stood up on a crate and asked "can you see me now?".


The four men answered back "Yes" "Oui" "Si" "Ja"

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The Entertainment

A charitable man decided to visit a sick ward at a hospital to cheer up the patients. He took along a keyboard and played humorous songs and told jokes at many a bedside. After finishing his final performance for an old man he said, "I hope you get better." The old man smiled vaguely at the performer and replied, "I hope you do too."

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Four Europeans and a Juggler

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching a street performer do some excellent juggling.

The juggler notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands up on a large wooden box and calls out, "Can you all see me now?"

"Yes."
"Oui."
"SΓ­."
"Ja."

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Four men are watching a street performer

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German are all standing watching a street performer juggle. The juggler notices that the four men have a poor view, so he stands up on a large wooden box and calls out, "Can you see me now?"

And they replied,
Yes.
Oui.
SΓ­.
Ja.

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English, French, Spanish, German

Four guys, one English, one French, one Spanish and one German are walking down the road.
They come to a square where a large crowd has gathered. They realise that a street performer is currently performing there, but they cannot see him because of the crowd.
So the English guy shouts, "We can't see you!"
Since everyone is quiet and watching his performance, the performer hears this. He pushes over a nearby table, stands on it and asks, "How about now?"
And the four guys reply,
"Yes." "We." "See". "Ya."

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German...

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching a street performer juggling. The juggler notices the four men have a very poor view, so he stands upon a large wooden box and calls out to them, "Can you see me now?"
"Yes."
"Oui."
"SΓ­."
"Ja."

(If you don't get it, read it out loud)

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An Englishman, a Spaniard, a Frenchman, and a German...

An Englishman, a Spaniard, a Frenchman, and a German are watching a street performer do some amazing juggling, but they don't have a good view. The street performer then moves and asks them:
"Can you guys see me now?"

"Yes"
"Oui"
"SΓ­"
"Ja"

Hint: Say out loud with respective accents.

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What do you get when you fuck a circus performer?

Cirque Du So-Laid

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Street Juggler

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German were all watching a street performer do some excellent juggling. The juggler notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands up on a large wooden box and calls out, "Can you all see me now?"

"Yes."
"Oui."
"SΓ­."
"Ja."

πŸ‘πŸΌ

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German...

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching an American street performer do some juggling. The juggler notices the four gentleman have a very poor view, so he stands up on a wooden crate and calls out, "Can you all see me now?"
"Yes" "Oui" "SΓ­" "Ja"

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The Street Performer

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching a street performer do some excellent juggling. The juggler notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands up on a large wooden box and calls out, "Can you all see me now?"

"Yes."

"Oui."

"SΓ­."

"Ja."

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I saw a street performer playing Dancing Queen on a Didgeridoo yesterday...

And I thought, that's ABBAriginal.

(Credit to Tim Vine)

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German...

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching a street perfomer do some excellent juggling. The juggler notices that the four gentlemen all share a very poor view, so he stands up on a large wooden box and calls out: "Can you all see me now?"

"Yes," replied the Englishman.

"Oui," replied the Frenchman.

"Si," replied the Spaniard.

"Ja," replied the German.


"Very good," said the street performer.

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How was your night?

John and Roy, two good friends, decide to go out to a bar on a Friday night and have a little fun. After a while, the two get bored and they each go their own way.

John, a bit tipsy (and a performer at heart), decides to try out in the bar's karaoke competition. To his surprise, he takes first place and wins a huge trophy!

Roy, the ladies man of the two, tries to find the most beautiful girl in the bar, and low and behold, Roy gets to talking with an absolute knockout, 10 out of 10. Things start to get serious, and eventually they head back to Roy's apartment.

The next day, the two meet back up at the same bar.

"How was your night, John?" Roy asked.

"Fantastic!" Said John. "Veni, vidi, vici, as the saying goes. I came. I saw. I conquered. What about you?"

Roy thought for a minute, and then smiled.

"What can I say? Vidi, vici, veni."

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"Always leave them wanting more" is great advice for a performer.

Restaurant owners, on the other hand…

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Why did people laugh when the circus performer tripped on the sidewalk?

because it was funny

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Walnuts and Coconuts

A young couple was in their honeymoon exploring the touristy area of a not so well known town when they encounter a young street performer demonstrating various feats of strength to the crowd's delight. For his finale he took a couple of walnuts and placed them on the table. He meditated for a moment then pull out his slong and whack the two walnuts open. The crowd explode in cheers.

40 years later the couple found themselves back in the same town and to their surprise saw the same street performer, albeit much older, performing the same show. This time, for his finale he grabbed two coconuts, placed them on the table, paused for a bit and then whacked the coconuts open with his slong. After the cheering had died down the couple approached the performer and told him how they saw his show many years ago but with the walnuts. With a bit of embarrassment the guy said
"My eyes are not what it used to be"

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A STD You Can Get From Performing

After performing, what STD did the performer get from the audience?

**The Clap**

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CONCLUSION

You've read some of the best performer jokes of all time. Most of the stories are suitable for kids with good sense of humor, children or teens boys and girls, of course dads. You must supervise kids not to read pranks for adults. Note that some jokes are disgusting, filled with black humor so don't tell dirty performer gags to your kids. These jokes are updated with new ones in December 2019.

How do I make my girlfriend or boyfriend laughs? Well, this list of funny stories will make you cry in laughter. Some of these performer jokes are funny and some are hilarious.

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