Perch Jokes
10 perch jokes and hilarious perch puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about perch that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Make your friends laugh with these hilarious jokes about perch fish, carp, trout, and cockatoos. Whether you’re looking for a pun or a laugh-out-loud one-liner, you’ll be sure to find the perfect joke in this collection.
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Uproarious Perch Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What is a good perch joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Two parrots were sitting on a perch
One says to the other... Do you smell fish?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A preacher is buying a parrot
"Are you sure it doesn't scream, yell, or swear?" asked the preacher.
"Oh absolutely. It's a religious parrot," the storekeeper assures him.
"Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lord's prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm."
"Wonderful!" says the preacher, "but what happens if you pull both strings?"
"I fall off my perch, you s**... fool!" screeched the parrot.
How many birds can you fit under a Scotsmans kilt?
Depends how big the perch is.
how do you keep a parrot on it's perch?
Use poligrip.
A postal carrier is working on a new beat.......
when all of a sudden he comes upon a garden gate marked BEWARE OF THE PARROT!
Befuddled, he looks down the walk and into the garden and, sure enough, there is indeed a parrot sitting on its perch.
He has a little chuckle to himself at the sign and the parrot there on its perch.
The mailman opens the gate and walks into the garden.
He gets as far as the parrot's perch, when suddenly the parrot calls out: "REX, ATTACK!"
What perches on your computer and says "Pieces of seven, pieces of seven"?
A parity error
A man goes into a pet shop to buy a monkey.
The shop owner points to 3 identical looking monkeys on a perch and says the monkey on the left cost $ 500.00
Why does that one cost so much? asked the shopper.
The owner says well the monkey knows how to use a computer.
The man then asks about the next monkey and was told that this one cost $1000.00,…
because it can do everything the other monkey can do plus he knows the Unix operating system.
Naturally the increasingly startled man asks about the third monkey to be told that it costs $ 2000.00
Needles to say this begs the question.
What can it do?
To which the owner replies:
To be honest I have never seen him do a thing but the other two call him BOSS.
Brother moves home to be closer to family...
Tells his buddy, grandpa has been filling his nieces head with all these projects uncle will do when he gets home.
Treehouse, forts, castle—a bird house on a perch SHE can play owl in! I once put together a shelf wrong on purpose so I wouldn't have to be handy! But ya know this does seem like a perfect time...
I feel ya but I remodeled my house with some great YouTube videos.
Oh she's doing the work I need supervisory skills to get ahead at the office
The Parrot
Every day, a woman walks by a pet store with a Parrot on a perch right outside the door, and as she walks by the parrot says, "Wow...you're ugly", or some other kind of insult about her looks.
She finally got tired of it and went in and told the owner, "Your parrot insults me every time I pass your store. I'm going away for two weeks and when I get back, if he insults me one more time I'm going to do something I may regret." The shopkeeper tells her..."I'm so sorry. I promise, he'll never insult you again"
Two weeks later, she's walking toward the shop all angry expecting the parrot to insult her...she gets close and they lock eyes...and the parrot says; "YOU know".
Talking Parrot :)
A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store.
The parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." Well, the lady is furious!
She stormed past the store to her work.
On the way home she saw the same parrot and it said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." She was incredibly ticked now.
The next day the same parrot again said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly."
The lady was so ticked that she went into the store and warned she would sue the store and kill the bird. The store manager replied profusely and promised he would make sure the parrot didn't say it again.
When the lady walked past the store that day after work the parrot called to her, "Hey lady."
She paused and said,"Yes?"
The bird said, "You know."
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