peggy Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious peggy puns

Dating in 1962

It was a hot Saturday evening in the summer of 1962 and Fred had a date with Peggy Sue.
He arrived at her house and rang the bell.

"Oh, come on in!" Peggy Sue's mother said as she welcomed Fred in.
"Have a seat in the living room. Would you like something to drink? Lemonade? Iced tea?"

"Iced tea, please," Fred said. Mom brought the iced tea.

"So, what are you and Peggy planning to do tonight?" she asked.

"Oh, probably catch a movie, and then maybe grab a bite to eat at the malt shop,
maybe take a walk on the beach..."

"Peggy likes to screw, you know," Mom informed him.

"Uh...really?" Fred replied, with raised eyebrows.

"Oh, yes!" the mother continued. "When she goes out with her friends, that's all they do!"

"Is that so?" asked Fred, incredulous.

"Yes," said the mother. "As a matter of fact, she'd screw all night if we let her!"

"Well, thanks for the tip," Fred said as he began thinking about alternate plans for the evening.

A moment later, Peggy Sue came down the stairs looking pretty as a picture wearing a pink blouse
and full circle skirt, and with her hair tied back in a bouncy ponytail. She greeted Fred.

"Have fun, kids," the mother said as they left.

Half an hour later, a completely disheveled Peggy Sue burst into the house
and slammed the front door behind her.

"The Twist, Mom!" she angrily yelled at her mother. "The damned dance is called the Twist!



Little Johnny walks into the local whorehouse carrying his piggybank and a flattened dead frog with a piece of string tied around its neck. Johnny tells the woman at the counter he'd like to have sex with a woman.

"Well it seems you have enough money here, any special type of girl you'd like?"

Johnny replies, "Peggy. I hear Peggy has aids, and she's the one I want to have sex with."

The receptionist is a bit confused, but she takes Johnny to a room in the back and tells him to go on inside. A little while passes, and out comes Johnny, still dragging the flattened frog behind him. The receptionist is just too curious and asks, "Son, why did you want to have sex with Peggy if you knew she had aids?"

Johnny replied, "Well, it's like this. Tonight when my parents go out to dinner, I'll have sex with the babysitter, and I'll give aids to her. Then when my dad takes her home later, he'll pull over and they'll have sex too, so he'll get aids. After he gets home, he'll have sex with my mom, and she'll get aids too. Then tomorrow morning, the milkman will stop at my house after my dad leaves for work and he'll have sex with my mom, so he'll catch aids as well. And that's the motherfucker that ran over my frog."


What do you call a lady pirate with one leg?



How do people get Bill from William? Peggy from Margaret? and more importantly how do you get Dick from Richard?

You ask nicely.


What do you call a woman with a wooden leg?



Doctor: Peggy, it looks like you are pregnant.

Peggy: Oh god... I'm pregnant?

Doctor: No, it just looks like you are.


What do you call a woman with one leg?



What's green and skates?

Peggy Phlegm


What are the most funny Peggy jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Peggy? Well, here are the best Peggy dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Peggy pick up lines to share with friends.


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