Pedantic Jokes
21 pedantic jokes and hilarious pedantic puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about pedantic that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Pedantic Short Jokes
Short pedantic jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pedantic humour may include short picky jokes also.
- I just did one of those "what noun are you" quizzes... and I got "pedantic", which is an adjective.
- My wife said we would have less arguments if I wasn't so pedantic.. I said, 'I think you mean fewer arguments'
- My girlfriend has just told me, she thinks we'd have less arguments if I wasn't so pedantic. I told her, "I think you mean fewer".
- My friend once told me "You must be the most pedantic person in the entire world." "Third most, actually."
- My wife told me she thought we'd have less arguments if I wasn't so pedantic. I told her 'I think you mean fewer'.
- After nitpicking a small detail in my friend's story, he said to me "What are you? President of the Pedantic Society?" Vice President, actually.
- I have an overtly pedantic Chinese friend. His name is Meticulous Lee.
I'll show myself out... - I recently ordered a pedant online for my girlfriend I don't want to get into the specifics, but it's not what I wanted
- Earlier today my 6-year old told me I was "being abantic." Jesus, get it right kid. It's pronounced *pedantic*...
- People say I am pedantic That means I have to overexplain everything and assume that people are s**....
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Pedantic One Liners
Which pedantic one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pedantic? I can suggest the ones about pretentious and sarcastic.
- Statistics show that 47% of people are pedantic. Well, 46.8%.
- If I had a penny for every time I was pedantic... I'd have £564.72
- What's a pedantic's favorite song? All the small things.
- Why are monkeys pedantic? Because they love nitpicking.
- I've opened a shop for pedants. We're open from 8:03 to 5:32
- Lifes to short To be a dirty, filthy, soulless pedant!
- What do Driving Testers and Vegetarians have in common? They are both very pedantic
- Is it better to say... ...pedantic, overscrupulous, or punctilious?
- Some call me a know it all. But technically, I'm just being pedantic.
- How many pedants does it take to replace a burnt light bulb? Glass doesn't burn.
Delightful Fun Pedantic Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about pedantic you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean punctual jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make pedantic pranks.
A therapist gets a call from their patient saying they are going to kill themself…
Therapist: Why do you want to kill yourself?
Patient: Because you don't take me seriously, and you're always needlessly pedantic!
Therapist: How would you do it?
Patient: I'm going to jump.
Therapist: Now?
Patient: Yes now! I'm looking at a hundred foot drop…
Therapist: Where are you?
Patient: The cliff overlooking the ocean. I mean it doc,I don't care if I drown or hit the rocks. I'll do it! I'll jump!
Therapist: but… that's a bluff.
Patient: …………..
Therapist: Hello?
How many insufferable pedants does it take to change a lightbulb?
Technically, you don't "change" a lightbulb. Lightbulbs don't change. You have to *remove* the lightbulb and *replace* it with a *different* lightbulb.
My wife and I have been arguing a lot because she thinks I'm too pedantic
So I've started drinking.
She told me, Alcohol isn't a solution.
Actually, I replied it's excellent at dissolving many substances.
