Peculiar Jokes
14 peculiar jokes and hilarious peculiar puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about peculiar that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Peculiar Short Jokes
Short peculiar jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The peculiar humour may include short unusual jokes also.
- A teacher asks a student to "name two animals peculiar to Australia" He responds with "The polar bear and penguin are peculiar to Australia, but the kangaroo and dingo live there."
- I came across something really peculiar last night... I think she was half-goat or something?
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Peculiar One Liners
Which peculiar one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with peculiar? I can suggest the ones about strange and bizarre.
- What's the strangest type of liar? A peculiar.
Gather Around for Fun Peculiar Jokes and Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about peculiar you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mysterious jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make peculiar pranks.
Mahatma Gandhi was a strange person.
He walked barefoot everywhere, to the point that his feet became quite thick and hard. He often went on hunger strikes, and even when he wasn't on a hunger strike, he did not eat much and became quite thin and frail. He also was a very spiritual person. Finally, because he didn't eat much and when he did his diet was peculiar, he developed very smelly breath.
He eventually became known as a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
We have an Irish guy who comes to the pub every night and orders two beers at the same time.
He was asked about this peculiar practice and said, I promised me brother in Ireland that I would always have a pint for him while in America .
This went on for years. The man was a fixture at the bar, ordering his two pints and sitting at the bar drinking them by himself for years.
One day, the man walked into the bar and said, bartender, one beer please . Silence fell. After a few moments, the bartender comes over, hands the man his pint, and says, Hey, I'm really sorry about your brother .
What? Me brother is fine! I've quit drinking .
Scientists and spiders.
There was a scientist working away in obscurity for years with peculiar experiments on spiders. After years and years he placed an advertisement in several academic journals to let everyone know he and was to host a live show to demonstrate his findings.
At the event hundreds were there more out of curiosity than anything as the details of the findings were kept secret. The man himself wandered on stage and silenced the murmurs.
'Today I will demonstrate two things. The first being that spiders can understand and respond to basic commands.'
The crowd laughed and jeered but undeterred he opened a box on his desk and a spider crawled out.
'Spider, walk left'
The spider moved to its left. The crowd was silenced.
'Spider, move right.'
The spider moved right. The crowd gasped. Forward, backward, the spider responded again and again. The crowd applauded in awe.
The scientist then removed all of the spider's legs. The crowd, confused by this, watched in silence.
'Move left'
The spider didn't move.
'Move right'
Nothing. Forward, backward, no response.
'This is to demonstrate my second finding. Once you remove a spider's legs, it goes deaf.'
A man in Russia was arrested for saying that Putin is an idiot and given a peculiar sentence to one year and fourteen days precisely in prison.
That's fourteen days for criticising the government, and one year for revealing a state secret.
I walked through the front door after work and our parrot said "Don't tell my husband", which I thought was rather peculiar.
So I walked upstairs to my wife, whose lipstick was smudged, her skirt a mess, and face covered in sweat.
"Everything ok?" she asked, flustered.
"Honey," I said, "I've got a question to ask you..."
"Yes! Sure!" she panicked, straightening her clothes, "What is it?"
I said, "Since when was our parrot married?"
A research group on sea mammals captured a rather odd porpoise on one of its trips.....
Its peculiarity was that it had feet. After they had photographed and measured the poor thing, they prepared to set it free.
"Wait a minute," said one of the researchers, "Wouldn't it be a kindness if our ship's doctor here were to amputate the feet so that it would be like other porpoises?" "Not on your life," exclaimed the doctor,
"That would be defeeting the porpoise."
We have an Irish guy who comes to the pub every night and orders two beers at the same time.
He was asked about this peculiar practice and said, I promised me brother in Ireland that I would always have a pint for him while in America .
This went on for years. The man was a fixture at the bar, ordering his two pints and sitting at the bar drinking them by himself for years.
One day, the man walked into the bar and said, bartender, one beer please . Silence fell. After a few moments, the bartender comes over, hands the man his pint, and says, Hey, I'm really sorry about your brother .
What? Me brother is fine! I've quit drinking .
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A cowboy rides into a new town,
and stops at the first saloon he sees.
Walks in, and is surprised that the whole place is empty except for the bartender polishing some glasses.
So he asks, "Where is everyone?"
Barkeep looks up from his busy work and replies, "Well, probably at the hanging."
Cowboy asks, "Who you all hanging?
Bartender replies, "Ol' Paper Bag Pete."
"Peculiar name.", says the cowboy.
"Yep", replies the bartender. "He was a peculiar fellow. Made his shirts out of paper bags, his pants out of paper bags...heck, even his boots out of paper bags."
"That is strange, but don't seem i**.... What is he being hanged for?" asked the cowboy
Bartender took a deep breath, "Rustlin'"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I went on a vacation to Taiwan...
I asked around for tourist attractions
A peculiar man came up to me, inquiring about some \*discount\* s**... shop
When in Taiwan, am I right? Needless to say I was intrigued.
He said to me, "go down to da beach,
aska bout da tongue twister packege
my friend will make you happy"
So I went to the beach, as the man had suggested. I asked about the tongue twister package. I was not disappointed. If you're ever in Taiwan, make sure to visit that guy at the beach.
He sells shemales at the seashore.
Gandhi, while he was a great person, had many flaws.
He walked barefoot everywhere, to the point that his feet became very thick, and hard callouses developed on his toes. He often went on long hunger strikes, and even when he wasn't on a hunger strike, he did not eat much and became quite thin and frail. In addition to this, he also was a very spiritual person. Finally, because he didn't eat much and when he did his diet was peculiar, he developed some very smelly breath.
He eventually became known as a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.