Peanut Butter Day Jokes
9 peanut butter day jokes and hilarious peanut butter day puns to laugh out loud. Read holiday jokes about peanut butter day that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Peanut Butter Day Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good peanut butter day joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was looking for something to eat the other day & I found this Kentucky brand jelly my wife bought.
I tell you it don't matter, even if you put peanut butter on the bread too, you just can't make a decent sandwich with it. Got no taste.
I told her, "Woman, don't buy that k**... jelly anymore!"
One of these days, I'm going to go fishing for complements.
I hope I catch some peanut butter and jelly.
I wish my girlfriend was like my dog
Could lick peanut butter off me any time of the day
Blonde Joke
Jake returns home after a long days work, finds the cupboards bare and thinks "that's strange we went shopping this week". He goes to the garbage can to find jars of peanut butter, yogurt, pill bottles, assorted food they've just bought discarded. He asks "Honey why is all the food in the garbage?" he finds her watching TV in the living room she says "Roger is dead", stunned he runs to the backyard to find their pet seal dead. He runs inside shocked and says "wow that's terrible, but why did you throw out all the food?!" she replies "They containers all said DO NOT USE IF SEAL IS BROKEN".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An Englishman, a Scot, and an Irishman are all eating lunch together.
The Englishman says, "I hate bologna! If I get bologna one more time, I'm going to kill myself!"
The Scot says, "I hate ham! If I get ham one more time, I'll kill myself, too!"
The Irishman says, "I hate peanut butter! If I get peanut butter one more time, I'll do the same thing!"
The next day, each of them gets the same lunch as they did the day before, and killed themselves. At the f**..., their widows started talking.
The Englishman's wife said, "If I knew he didn't want bologna, I wouldn't have made it for him!" and began crying uncontrollably.
The Scot's wife said, "If I knew he didn't like ham, I would have made something else!" and also began crying.
The Irishman's wife said, "I don't know what his problem was. He made his own lunch!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three construction workers were having lunch on a high rise..
The first worker opens up his lunchbox and says, are you kidding me? Another bologna sandwich! Every day its bologna! If I get another bologna sandwich i'm going to jump off this high rise! The second worker opens his lunch box and says, yeah i'm with you man I cant take anymore of this! The third worker says i'm with you guys. So the next day the three workers are all getting ready to eat lunch and they are all thinking about what they had said the day before. The first worker slowly opens his lunch box. Phew! Ham and cheese he says. The second worker cautiously opens his and says, thank god peanut butter and jelly! The third worker opens his and says oh man bologna, see you guys later and jumps off the high rise. The first worker then starts laughing and the second worker says, why are you laughing? Our friend of ten years just committed s**...! Then first worker says, cause the idiot packs his own lunch.
Three men, a blonde, brunette, and a redhead are eating lunch...
... During their break at work. They all pull out their sandwiches and open them up to find out what they got to eat. First the redhead sees that he got ham and exclaims, "Ham again! If I get ham again I'm going to jump off a cliff and kill myself!" Next the brunette opens his sandwich and exclaims, "Turkey again! If I get turkey again I'm going to jump off a cliff and kill myself!" Lastly the blonde opens his sandwich and exclaims, "If I get peanut Butter and jelly one more time I'm going to jump off a cliff and kill myself!" The next day all three men got the same type of sandwich again and proceeded to the nearest cliff and jumped off.
Now the wifes are being interviewed:
The redheads wife says "If I would have known, I would have never done it!" And burst out crying The brunettes wife says "If I would have known I would have never done it!" And burst out crying. Lastly the blondes wife says "Hey don't look at me, he made his own sandwiches"
Three men are all working on building a house.
They go up to the roof for lunch, and unwrapped their sandwiches. The Brunette says "if I get one more Tuna sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The black haired one says "if I get one more pickle and lettuce sandwich, I, too, am going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The blonde looks at his sandwich and also declares, "if I get one more peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself." The next day, they all get the same sandwiches and kill themselves. That night, their wives all meet up and mourn. "If I had known that my husband was going to kill himself over a sandwich, I wouldn't have given it to him." The brunette cries. "Same," the raven head replies. They both look at the blonde. "Don't look at me, he packed his own lunch!"
Three men are all working on building a house.
They go up to the roof for lunch, and unwrapped their sandwiches. The Brunette says "if I get one more Tuna sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The black haired one says "if I get one more pickle and lettuce sandwich, I, too, am going to jump off this roof and kill myself. The blonde looks at his sandwich and also declares, "if I get one more peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I'm going to jump off this roof and kill myself." The next day, they all get the same sandwiches and kill themselves. That night, their wives all meet up and mourn. "If I had known that my husband was going to kill himself over a sandwich, I wouldn't have given it to him." The brunette cries. "Same," the raven head replies. They both look at the blonde. "Don't look at me, he packed his own lunch!"
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