Patriotic American Jokes
17 patriotic american jokes and hilarious patriotic american puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about patriotic american that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Patriotic American Short Jokes
Short patriotic american jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The patriotic american humour may include short patriotic jokes also.
- I think the most patriotic part of the entire super bowl was Rihanna's halftime performance Because there's nothing more American than for a woman to work while she's pregnant.
- I wrote an essay about American Patriotism Then I pointed at it and started shouting ' You Essay! You Essay!'
- As a true American Patriot I always put phone numbers I want to ignore under the contact "Freedom" Because I always let Freedom Ring.
- Patriotism. Being in the American military gives one the rare and distinctively American opportunity to live under a bridge that may one day be posthumously dedicated to you.
- I'm a great American for three reasons Because I'm:
Brave
Patriotic
Humble
And great at math
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Patriotic American One Liners
Which patriotic american one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with patriotic american? I can suggest the ones about american flag and american people.
- Which of the American forces is the most patriotic? The air force, because its US AF.
- How do you know if a programmer is a patriotic American? If they remember Perl Harbor.
- What the american patriots like the most? The Stars and Stripes made in China
Patriotic American Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about patriotic american you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean patriots fans jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make patriotic american pranks.
..Trump said "Buy american, Hire american"
Standing on an Ikea podium from *Sweden*, behind bullet proof by Saint Gobain Glass from *France*, smiling at a 4K Sony *Japanese* Video camera, speaking into a Dolby Sennheiser *German* microphone, with vigorous hand gestures giving a glimpse of a Rolex under the cuff made in *Switzerland*
he patriotically said ..*"Buy American, Hire American, Stop Immigrants".* while standing beside a *Slovenian wife*
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Patriotism
A nurse was taking care of a soldier in the Army Hospital.
"How I wish I could kiss the American flag before I die," the soldier said.
The nurse was extremely touched by the soldier's patriotism and said, "I have a tattoo of the American flag on my bottom. You may kiss it if you don't mind."
"Of course I wouldn't mind. Thank you for fulfilling my last wish," the soldier said.
The nurse took off her p**... and the dying soldier kissed the flag.
"Thank you, nurse," he said "Now would you be so kind as to turn around so that I could kiss Bush too?"
An American patriot with amputated arms decides to replace them.
He obtains a pair of grizzly bear arms from a black market, and attaches them on his own, with the help of a friend.
He is arrested for contribution to animal cruelty and performing medical procedures unlicensed.
When taken to court, he gives a speech defending his right to bear arms.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Queen of England doesn't know much about American football...
But she does wish someone would do something about those troublesome Patriots.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
America
How to rescue the economy:
Dear President Obama,
Patriotic retirement:
There are about 40 million people over 50 in the work force;
pay them $1 million a piece severance with stipulations:
1) They leave their jobs. Forty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.
2) They buy NEW American cars. Forty million cars ordered - Auto Industry fixed.
3) They either buy a house or pay off their mortgage- Housing Crisis fixed.
All this and it's still cheaper than the "bailout".
Obama walks into a bar, but he's invisible.
The bartender says "Ok, I'll bite. Why are you invisible?"
Barack says "Well, I found a bottle on the beach and...then I rubbed it." "And then...importantly...A genie came out." "The genie said I could have...3 wishes."
For my first wish, I said "Let me say this, and this is profoundly important...I want Michelle to marry me...I love her,...and I think America will love her too." That wish was granted.
For my second wish, I said "Like all patriotic Americans, I am deeply patriotic...and I want to be President...of the United States...so I can serve my country." That wish was granted too.
And then, for my third wish, I started by saying "Let me be clear..."