Past Tense Jokes
64 past tense jokes and hilarious past tense puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about past tense that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Past Tense Short Jokes
Short past tense jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The past tense humour may include short present tense jokes also.
- Actually, the past tense is "hanged", as in "he hanged himself" Sorry about your Dad, though
- So I was asked the past tense of 'think' in a English test today I thought and thought and thought and finally wrote 'thunk'.
- I had posted this on Clean Jokes, just thought you guys would appreciate it. So, The Past, Present, and Future all walk into a bar
It was tense. - There's a question in the exam that said, "What is the past tense of 'think'?"
So I thought and thought and thought and eventually I picked 'thinked'. - An English Class Sentence: I live in Czechia.
"What is the verb in this sentence?"
"Umm... live?"
"Great, now how do we say this sentence in past tense?"
"Umm... I live in Czechoslovakia?" - Three words are having an argument... Had, Made, and Did were having a very heated argument. They became more and more agitated as the argument went on. It was beyond tense... It was past tense.
- How to get laid in 3 simple steps * Lay on your bed
* Wait 2 hours
* Lay becomes past tense - That just makes a lot of sense Did you know that the past tense of the word "read" is Reddit?
- The ghosts of Christmas past, present and future are all sitting in a bar together. What a tense atmosphere.
- Two middle aged women are in Boston's fish market on Friday. "I come here every Friday to get scrod!"
"I do too, but I didn't know it has a past tense."
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Past Tense One Liners
Which past tense one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with past tense? I can suggest the ones about past continuous and past present future.
- So...the past, the present, and the future walked into a bar. It was tense.
- Why is nostalgia like grammar? We find the present tense and the past perfect
- How to get laid?? 1. Lay on bed.
2. Wait two hours.
3. Lay becomes past tense. - Teacher: What is the tense of the phrase "I am beautiful" Student: Past
- What do you call an English teacher who used to have anxiety? Past tense.
- What is the past tense of blink? ___
- what's the past tense of seesaw? is it seensaw or sawsaw?
- The past, present and the future started fighting. It was in*tense*
- Growing old is a lot like grammar The past is perfect and the present, tense
- What's the past tense of William Shakespeare? Wouldiwas Shookspeared
- All my physical relationships are like past-tense verbs They end with ED.
- What is a Trump supporter's favorite grammar tense? Past perfect.
- Why was Bob shaking? Because he was past tense.
- I'm giving up past tense... ...for Lend.
- Why is the past tense in german called Perfekt? Because back in the good old days...
Past Tense Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about past tense you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean present perfect jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make past tense pranks.
What is the definition of "moon"?
The past tense of "moo"!
An old teacher asked her student, "
If I say, 'I am beautiful,' which tense is that?"
The student replied, "It is obviously past."
I got news from the future.
That the past tense has since relaxed.
How does someone stop ISIS?
Change their name to past tense, WASWAS.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Fascinate
Teacher: Can anyone use the word "fascinate" in a sentence?
Billy: I was fascinated by the sunrise.
Teacher: Good, but "fascinated" is past tense. Can anyone else try?
Suzie: It was fascinating to see the flowers grow.
Teacher: Good, Suzie, but you added an "ing" at the end of the word and made it an adjective. I just want to hear the verb "fascinate".
Ernie: Yo mama got a blouse with 12 b**... on it...but she so fat, she can only fascinate!
It was fun watching a Christmas carol. The ghosts of Christmas past, present and future were great.
It was in tense.
Future, Present and Past were having an argument
It was getting pretty tense
"Actually the past tense is 'murdered' as in 'he murdered her' "
"Sorry about your parents though"
Son comes home after giving an exam.
Dad: So, how was the exam?
Son: I knew all the answers, but one question got me confused.
Dad: What was the question?
Son: Well, the question was 'What's the past tense of *think*? '. I didn't know the answer, so I thought and thought and finally wrote *thank*.
Siri:
The past, present and future walk into a bar. It was tense.
I did have to ask for a joke in English, as the first time Siri said she would, but I wouldn't understand a joke in her language.
Why doesn't past like present or future tense?
Because they're too tense together.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Carrot Stuck....
Is the past tense of Carrot Stick.
Unfortunately, my wife did not appreciate this as she was gesturing to her t**... and coughing.
John, a 5yr old boy asks his 1yr elder brother, Tom, a question.
John- Is the past tense of "drink", "drunk" or "drank"?
Tom- It's "drank".
John- Then what about "drunk"?
Tom- That's future tense. Our father always gets drunk after he drinks.
What's the past tense of cake?
Bake
The English language is easy. Take the statement "I flexed yesterday" for example...
It's a sentence using the past tense.
My kid just asked 'What's the past tense of yeet?'. So I told him it's 'yate'.
In the morning, yeet your breakfast.
Then you're full because yate your breakfast.
(mayeb it isn't really a joke, but he laughed when I said it)
The past tense of bee...
...is wasp!
You can't have run through a campfire
You would have ran past tense
I finished my English lessons yesterday.
My mom asked me how it had gone on a scale from one to ten.
It was Past Perfect Tense.
Student 1: "How did your English test go?"
Student 2: "It was easy, but question 8 was confusing."
Student 1: "What was it?"
Student 2: "It asked for the past tense of 'think'. I thought and thought and thought, and I ended up putting down 'thinked.'"
A copy editor walks into a bar and orders a beer.
"I'm giving up the past tense for Lend," he tells the bartender.
James and John were given a question from their teacher to which they had to answer
Their question was to write the past tense of a sentence
The boy has a cold
James wrote The boy had a cold
John wrote The boy had had a cold because it is grammatically correct to say 'had had' back to back
The teacher looked at the two answers and proceeded to mark Johns as correct and James's as incorrect
So to summarise: John, while James had had 'had', had, had had 'had had'; 'had had' had had a better effect on the teacher.
To clarify: this is not my joke, I found it on a video and it was really funny so I decided to post it
A student got home from school and his mum asked him how the test went.
He said it was easy but one question held him up. The mother asked what the question was.
" They asked what the past tense of think was" the boy answered. "So what did you write?" the mother asked.
"I thought and thought and thought until I finally wrote thinked"! The boy replied.
A Killer Dies, And Meets His Victim In The Afterlife...
The killer stares awkwardly at the victim, the victim stares back. Unsure what to do, the killer finally says, "Well... This feels pretty tense."
The victim replies, "Oh, we're past tense."