Password Jokes

What are some Password jokes?

Set your wifi password to 2444666668888888

So when someone ask tell them it's 12345678

Me: What's the wifi password?

Bartender: You need to buy a drink first.

Me: Okay, I'll have a coke.

Bartender: Is Pepsi okay?

Me: Sure. How much is that?

Bartender: $3.

Me: There you go. So what's the wifi password?

Bartender: You need to buy a drink first. No spaces, all lowercase.

Apparently you can't use beefstew as a password.

It's not stroganoff.

*Creating password*

"MTWTFSS_MTWTFSS"

ERROR: [Password two week]


^Edited ^for ^better ^understanding

Why you can't use 'Beef Stew' as a password..

Because is not stroganoff

Enter password: 'snowflake'

Confirm password: 'snowflake'

Error, your passwords are not alike

The blonde's password

During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password: "MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento"
When asked why such a long password, she said she was told that it had to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital.

Tried changing my password to "14days"

but it was two week

What was Forrest Gump's email password?

1forrest1

My manly password

My wife and I were trying to set up a new password for our computer.

Trying to be clever, I put "Mypenis" and my wife fell to the ground laughing hysterically because on the screen it said:

**"Error. Not long enough."**

What's Forest Gump's password?

1forest1

I tried to change my password to Beefstew1

But they said it wasn't stroganoff

Creating a new password

Enter password

'Snowflake'

Re-enter password

'Snowflake'

Your passwords are not alike

I tried changing my password to "Twilight".

It said "Error: contains too many useless characters"

Tried to change my password to Twilight...

...but got an error message saying please re-enter as this contains too many useless characters :(

Russian computer: "Enter password"

Me: "Beef stew"

Russian computer: "Password not stroganoff"

I like my passwords like my girlfriends:

change them every 6 months, never share them and make sure my wife doesn't know any of them

A man needs WiFi at the local pub.

A man goes into a local pub and has poor cell signal.

He asks for the WiFi password.

The bartender replies: You need to buy a drink first.

The man says fine and orders a Coke, which costs him $3. He then asks again, what's the WiFi password?

The bartender answers: You need to buy a drink first, all lowercase no spaces.

I tried to sign up to a website yesterday. I put in the password 'beefstew'

But it said the password wasn't stroganoff.

My gf told me to stop being childish, she just wants to come in for a talk

not my fault she cant remember the password to my pillow fortress

If your workplace requires password changes every 90 days

just set it to the name of the current Australian Prime minister and you should be fine.

A young man helps his grandfather with his computer issues

His grandfather seems to be unable to set a password.

Trying to figure out the problem the young man looks at the password the old man is trying to set

His password is ParisLondonMickeyMouse

Puzzled by this, the man asks his grandfather why he wants to set this password anyways.

The grandfather simply replies: It wanted two capitals and a character .

I want my password to be beef stew

but google says it's not stroganoff.

I was at a funeral & asked the priest for the WiFi password

"Have some respect for the dead!" he said

I replied "Is that all lower case?"

Please enter your new password

WEBSITE: Please enter your new password

ME: beef

WEBSITE: Sorry. Your password is not stroganoff


credit goes to my girlfriend

Just tried to change my password to..

Just tried to change my password to.. 'The_Last_Jedi,' but Facebook wouldn't let me. Said there are too many useless characters.

Did you hear the one about the LGBTQ2S+ community?

They're working together to build the perfect password

Wifi password

I was doing an overnight at a hotel away from home. I took my computer to the hotel lounge to do some work. I sat down at the bar and I asked the bartender, "What's the WiFi password?"

Bartender: You need to buy a drink first.

Me: Okay, I'll have a beer.

Bartender: We have Molson's Canadian on tap.

Me: Sure. How much is that?

Bartender: $8.00.

Me: Okay, here you go. What's the WiFi password?

Bartender: "youneedtobuyadrinkfirst" -- no spaces and all lowercase.

What is Tom Hanks' wireless password?

1forrest1

Needed a Password eight characters long::

So, I went with 'Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs'.

Husband and wife decide to make a password...

...for sex,
they decide on 'washing machine'.
Later in bed that night husband says,
Washing machine.
Wife replies, Not tonight darling I have a sore head.
Half an hour passes and she feels guilty so she says,
Washing machine.
Husband replies,
Too late it was only a small load so I decided to do it by hand.

Tried to sign up to a website the other day...

I put my password as "beef stew"

It said password not stroganoff.

A blonde is taking money out of an ATM,

when the blonde behind her in line says, "Ha! Ha! I know your password. It's four asterisks."

The first blonde replies, "Ha! Ha! No it's not. It's 3862."

If it wasn't for my wife, I'd probably be writing depressive Facebook messages all day.

But she changed my password.

CREATE PASSWORD -

"123Bob".

Password must contain no names, be complex and have over 50 characters.

"GameOfThrones"

Password accepted.

My email password has been hacked again

That's the third time I've had to rename my cat

I asked the CIA for my lost GMail password...

They sent it to me via my smart TV

I tried to use the password "beefstew" for my iTunes account.

But Siri said it wasn't stroganoff.

I just found out I couldn't use "beef stew" as a password.

Apparently it's not stroganoff.

Most Confusing Password

I was in a couple's home trying to fix their Internet connection. 
The husband called out to his wife 
in the other room for the computer password. Start with a capital S, then 123, she shouted back.

We tried S123 several times, but 
it didn't work. So we called the wife in. As she input the password, she muttered, I really don't know what's so difficult about typing Start123.

Change your WiFi password to 2444666668888888

So when someone asks for it, you can say 12345678

Apparently you can't use "fortnight" as a password.

Two week.

A Blonde calls tech support

She is told that in order to get help, they need her password.
She says that the password is "MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento"

When asked why she had chosen such a long password, she said she was told that it had to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital.

What's Forest Gumps password?

1FORREST1

I sure like that my car insurance requires a 10 character password.

I sure would hate it if someone ..... paid my car insurance?

I changed my password to "incorrect"

So when I forget it my computer will tell me "your password is incorrect"

What's the most-clicked link on the Alzheimer's support website?

Forgot Your Password?

Password security questions for the depressed

What is the name of your least favorite child?

In what year did you abandon your dreams?

What is the maiden name of your father's mistress?

At what age did your childhood pet run away?

What was the name of your favorite unpaid internship?

In what city did you first experience ennui?

What is your ex-wife's newest last name?

What sports team do you fetishize to avoid meaningful discussion with others?

What is the name of your favorite canceled TV show?

What was the middle name of your first rebound?

On what street did you lose your childlike sense of wonder?

When did you stop trying?

Lots of people use their kid's name as their password

I love my son mHh$5rY%[email protected]#JJ5

What do passwords and teenagers have in common?

They are both insecure.

Please enter your new password

WINDOWS: Please enter your new password.

USER: cabbage

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.

USER: boiled cabbage

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.

USER: 1 boiled cabbage

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces.

USER: 50bloodyboiledcabbages

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character.

USER: 50BLOODYboiledcabbages

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively.

USER: 50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon'tGiveMeAccessNow!

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation.

USER:ReallyPissedOff50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIf

YouDontGiveMeAccessNow

WINDOWS: Sorry, that password is already in use.

Yesterday I tried to set my new password as "beefstew"

It said the password was not stroganoff...

Tried to Select a Password

WEBSITE: Please enter your new password.
USER: cabbage
WEBSITE: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.
USER: boiled cabbage
WEBSITE: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.
USER: 1 boiled cabbage
WEBSITE: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces.
USER: 50fuckingboiledcabbages
WEBSITE: Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character.
USER: 50FUCKINGboiledcabbages
WEBSITE: Sorry, the password cannot use more than one consecutive upper case character.
USER: 50FuckingBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAss!
WEBSITE: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation
USER: 50FuckingBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDontGiveMeAccessNow
WEBSITE: That password is already in use.

Why isn't beef a good password

It isn't stroganoff

A man at a funeral Interrupts the priest and says, "Excuse me, do you have the WiFi password?"

The priest stares at him and says, "Good God man, have some decency. This is your mother's funeral!"

The man replies, "Is that all lower case?"

PASSWORD PROBLEMS

WINDOWS: Please enter your new password.

USER: cabbage


WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.

USER: boiled cabbage



WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.

USER: 1 boiled cabbage



WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces.

USER: 50bloodyboiledcabbages



WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain at least one uppercase character.

USER: 50BLOODYboiledcabbages



WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot use more than one uppercase character consecutively.

USER: 50BloodyBoiledCabbagesYouStupidIdiotGiveMeAccessNow!



WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation.

USER : IWillHuntYouDown50BloodyBoiledCabbagesYouStupidIdiotGiveMeAccessNow


WINDOWS: Sorry, that password is already in use.

My girlfriend wanted to have a talk about how childish i am

But she didn't have the secret password to my pillow fort so she couldn't get in

I just tried changing my password to Beefstew1

But the site said that it was not stroganoff.

*Creating password*

"fortnight"

Error: [Password two week]

Welcome to the Alzheimer's information support page...

...please enter your 17 digit password.

My father asked for the Wi-Fi password...

It's taped under the modem, I told him.

After three failed attempts to log on, he asked, Am I spelling this right? T-A-P-E-D-U-N-D-E-R-T-H-E-M-O-D-E-M?

Tech Support

USER: I can't get on the Internet.

SUPPORT: Are you sure you used the right password?

USER: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.

SUPPORT: Can you tell me what the password was?

USER: Five dots.

Enter Password : chucknorris

Error: Password too strong.

so I walked in an interview and..

.. and interviewer asks for my email password :

interviewer : What is the password of your email ?
me : it's way123
interviewer : is it 'way' or 'weigh' ?
me : The one that starts with 'f'
interviewer : There is no 'f' in way.
me : exactly.

Grandma's Password

My 100 year old grandma asked me to set up a security camera, so she could see who was stealing her clothes at her assisted living facility, so I brought over a wireless camera and started to install an app on her IPAD for monitoring.

I needed her Apple ID to download the app, so I asked her what her password was.

She poked around in her notebook, and said "required".

It was the wrong password, so I told her, and she looked up at me and said, 'I know that it is right. I remember it said, "Your password is required."'

set your wifi password to 2444666668888888

When somebody asks you, you say it is 12345678

Internet went down last night

My neighbour added a password

Google said I couldn't use "beef stew" as my password.

It's not stroganoff.

To the person who hacked my gmail account

What's my password?

Facebook Problem

Someone knocked at my door last evening. When I opened it, I saw a guy from Dominos holding a chicken pepperoni pizza with extra cheese and onion rings.

"I haven't ordered any pizza," I said. "This must be a mistake."

"I know," he replied. "Your neighbour forgot his Facebook Password and wanted to show you what he was eating for dinner."

Passwords

"Sorry, your password has been in use for 90 days and has expired - you must register a new one."

roses

"Sorry, too few characters."

pretty roses

"Sorry, you must use at least one numerical character."

1 pretty rose

"Sorry, you cannot use blank spaces."

1prettyrose

"Sorry, you must use at least 10 different characters."

1fuckingprettyrose

"Sorry, you must use at least one upper case character."

1FUCKINGprettyrose

"Sorry, you cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively."

1FuckingPrettyRose

"Sorry, you must use no fewer than 20 total characters."

1FuckingPrettyRoseShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon'tGiveMeAccessRightFuckingNow!

"Sorry, you cannot use punctuation."

1FuckingPrettyRoseShovedUpYourAssIfYouDontGiveMeAccessRightFuckingNow

"Sorry, that password is already in use."

My girlfriend wanted to talk to me about how childish I am...

...but she couldn't because she doesn't know the password to enter my pillow fort.

Set your wifi password to "Itsonthefridge"

So when people ask for it, they go to the fridge and look all over for it but find nothing.

A husband and wife are setting up a password for their new computer.

The husband types in "mypenis" as a password. The wife starts laughing uncontrollably, because on the screen, the computer says "Error. Not long enough".

I think I forgot my gmail password.

Yo CIA could you DM it to me?

Got a password lock

that takes a picture whenever someone tries the wrong password to look into my phone.
Now I have fifty pictures of drunk me.

My teenage son told me I am a resentful has-been. We had a good, hearty laugh together about that.

Then i changed the WIFI password

What was Jenny's password?

1forrest1

My password

is the last 9 digits of pi.

I tried to make my password "Beef stew"...

... but got the error message "your password is not stroganoff"

It's okay password...

...I'm insecure too...

I have no idea how many exes I have

But I can always change my Netflix password

Height of internet addiction

At a funeral in church


A visitor: What's the Wi-Fi password here ?

Priest: Respect the dead.

Visitor: all small letters?

I'm a lot like my password

Insecure.

Password must be eight characters long

I picked "SnowWhiteAndTheSevenDwarfs"

Choose a new password:

potato

Sorry, password must contain at least 8 letters.

boiled potato

Sorry, password must contain at least one number.

1 boiled potato

Sorry, password cannot contain spaces

50fuckingboiledpotatoes

Sorry, password must contain capital letters.

50FUCKINGboiledpotatoes

Sorry, capital letters must not be consecutive.

IwillShove50FuckingBoiledPotatoesUpYourAss,IfYouDoNotGiveMeAccessImmediately

Sorry, password must not contain punctuation.

NowIamSeriouslyGettingPissedOffIwillShove50FuckingBoiledPotatoesUpYourAssIfYouDoNotGiveMeAccessImmediately

Sorry, you can't change your password to a password that has already been used with this account. Choose a new password :

How to make Password puns?

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