Passion Jokes

57 passion jokes and hilarious passion puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about passion that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Discover the funniest jokes about passion fruit, enthusiasm, intimancy and obsession. Enjoy the wittiest stories that will make you laugh and lighten your day.

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Funniest Passion Short Jokes

Short passion jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The passion humour may include short affection jokes also.

  1. I brought my dead girlfriend back to life by passionately kissing her neck ...I guess you could say I'm a neck-romancer
  2. My wife told me to kiss her like if we were in a soap opera I hugged her tight, kissed her with passion and then slapped her because how dare she?!
  3. "YOU'LL SEE! THEY'LL ALL SEE!" \- said by a very passionate eye doctor as they throw eye glasses into a crowd.

    (credit goes to my mom)
  4. If you watch godzilla backwards it's about a dinosaur that passionately pieces a city back together before moonwalking into the sea.
  5. Scott Pruitt has resigned to focus more on his true passion.. Throwing uncut plastic soda rings into the ocean.
  6. What are the worst three words you could hear when you're in the middle of some passionate love making? "Honey, I'm home!"
  7. Steal a man's wallet and he will be broke for a week Give a man a lego passion and he will be broke for a lifetime
  8. I hate the book Fahrenhiet 451 so much Some people would say I hate it with a burning passion
  9. I found a new passion yesterday pairing socks. I guess I just enjoy bringing sole mates together.
  10. My friend said he hated grapefruit with a passion. I asked him if he also hates passion fruit with a grape.

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Passion One Liners

Which passion one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with passion? I can suggest the ones about ambition and obsession.

  1. What's more memorable than a passionate kiss? A stab wound
  2. Passionate kiss is like spider web leads to undoing of fly.
  3. Why are dolphins so passionate? Because they have a sense of porpoise.
  4. What did Julius Caesar say towards the end of a passionate night with Cleopatra? "Veni."
  5. Do you think campers are passionate? Because I often find them in tents.
  6. Which insects are the most passionate? Rome-ants
  7. What do you call a deceitful painter that has a passion for vegetables? A corn artist
  8. Why was the nose jealous of the hand? He was more passionate about his *job*
  9. Back in my Day Terrorists put more effort into their life's passion.
  10. I had a passionate affair with a girl from the circus It was in tents.
  11. The most beautiful makeup of a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy.
  12. Have you seen the Passion of the Christ? [Spoiler Alert] he dies in the end.
  13. I saw two tramps passionately making out in public. So I shouted, "Get a box."
  14. Im on the verge of starting my passion, a childrens sporting goods store Little d**...
  15. I finally saw Passion of the Christ Turns out his passion seems to be s**...

Passion Fruit Jokes

Here is a list of funny passion fruit jokes and even better passion fruit puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A man was convicted of stealing a few bags of Passiflora edulis at the supermarket Police say it was a crime of passion fruit.
  • Did anyone know what happened to that passion fruit truck c**... yesterday? It caused traffic jam.
Passion joke, Did anyone know what happened to that passion fruit truck c**... yesterday?

Uplifting Passion Jokes to have Hilarious Fun with Friends

What funny jokes about passion you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean inspiration jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make passion pranks.

Why is Al Gore bad at dancing?

You can't put passion into an Al Gore Rhythm (algorithm).
Anyone? Anyone?

I Hate My Life

I hate my life. I'm 22 and work at a fast food restaurant where my coworker hates me with a burning passion.
I'm extremely underpaid and if I ask for a raise my boss will kill me. I hate my town and the people in it. But I can't leave because I don't have a license.
And do you want to hear the worst part?
I live in a pineapple under the sea.

An American man hooks up with a Japanese woman... [n**...]

An American man hooks up with a Japanese woman the night before a game of golf with a big Japanese client.
The woman is screaming with passion a specific word in Japanese that the man could tell was a great thing. He decides to try it out at golf.
Each time the big client sinks the ball, the man shouts his newly learned Japanese word. Finally, after the 9th hole, the big client asks the man:
"Why do you keep shouting wrong hole?'"

What's a pirates favorite letter?

You would think R, but pirates really have a passion of the seas.

It doesn't hurt to be honest, they said...

Job interviewer: so tell us, why do you want this job?
Me: well, I've always had a passion for not starving to death

Everyone loves to hear my friend talk about his passion for taking naps.

He is intoresting...
I'll just go now.

The Cardiologist's f**...

A renowned cardiologist passed away, and all his friends from the same hospital attended his f**.... In order to pay tribute to his profession and his passion, he was buried in a coffin shaped like a heart.
After the service, it was noticed that one of the doctors was smiling. When asked why, he said "Oh, I'm just imagining my own f**.... I'm a gynecologist, you see."

Women are discussing their s**... life.

- My man is an architect. Our love life has form, vision and function, good plan as well.
- My man is an artist. Our love life has passion, imagination and improvisation.
- And my man is a programmer. He sits in bed and tells me how good it's going to be when it's ready.

With a s**... look and come-hither eyes filled with passion, my girlfriend asked me if I wanted her to shave before we had s**... for the first time. I rasped...

"No honey, your mustache looks fine to me."

A man owned a Greek island, but there so much paperwork that came with tourists travelling there that he always had to sit inside working. Eventually, he decided to pass the island on to someone else. This way he could spend more time outside and focus on his real passion - maths.

So, he signed over Kos and got a tan instead.

I couldn't be happier with my wife.

As soon as I show any hint of excitement or passion she immediately shuts me down.

s**... with my wife is like the England World Cup squad

neither of us know why we're there or what we're doing, there's little passion or communication and we rarely even make it past the first stage.
It's often accompanied by lots of unnecessary noise, horrible dribbling and never a clean sheet.
It's always over far too quickly and when it does end we know it'll be at least another 4 years before it happens again.

Movies are always worse than the books they are based off of except...

The Passion of the Christ..

I didn't quite get my girlfriend's complaints about my passion for Grease songs...

So I asked her to tell me more, tell me more.

What's the best way to feel better when everyone, including your friends, hates you with a passion?

Join the Supreme Court

True romance is dea-

If passion is fire, then my passion for you is a California wildfire.

As a passionate flat Earther

I find these ridiculous round Earth theories rather hyspherical.

PSA: Remember to take risks this upcoming year and live with passion.

Because hindsight is 2020, or so I've heard.

[Nsfw] What do you call it when getting ad hoc legal advice from a friend turns into a night of s**... passion?

IANAL s**...

So there was this king in Hawaii living in a straw thatch style palace whose hobby was collecting thrones...

Anytime some local carpenter created a new ornate chair, he had to have it for his collection. The guy was wild about them, it was his one true passion in life.
Well one day, lightning strikes during a thunderstorm and his palace burns down including his entire collection. He was crushed, never the same afterwards.
Well, you know what they say. People in grass houses shouldn't stow thrones.

My wife is a teacher.

One day I came back home and found a note of my son which stated, " Mom is teaching with laim man. "
I felt proud as she was following her passion and putting her knowledge in use.
Untill I remembered my son is dyslexic.

I'll only watch a Passion of the Christ sequel under one condition.

Jesus has to say, you crossed the wrong guy!
Nailed it.

If you start the Dark Side of the Moon by Pink Floyd and the passion of the Christ at the same time the scenes don't match up at all

It turns out Jesus was more of a nine inch nails guy

Thor gets a hit on his tinder profile...

After a night of wild, unrestrained god-level passion he notices his date looks a little knackered.
Sorry, but I'm Thor. He says
The girl looks up and says, You're Thor? I'm tho thor I can't thpeak

My girlfriend has always been a bit on the heavy side

One morning, while standing in front of the mirror together she asked me if she should change anything in her life. I said, go workout and lose 20-30 pounds, it would change you for the better. At that moment, the sheer passion I saw in her eyes I will never forget.
After the first day, I didn't see anything. To be expected of course, these things take time. Three days later, nothing. A week later, nothing. Two weeks later, and I finally started to see something. Thank god for that, I thought she knocked the light out of my eyes for good.

Passion joke, My girlfriend has always been a bit on the heavy side

jokes about passion