Party Wear Jokes
59 party wear jokes and hilarious party wear puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about party wear that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Party Wear Short Jokes
Short party wear jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The party wear humour may include short costume party jokes also.
- I just got kicked out of the weirdest gender reveal party.. Apparently we had to wear pants...
- My friend Ara and I agreed to meet up a mask party. When I got there she was wearing a mask completely made of Makeup.
I looked at her and said, That's some nice mask Ara. - I often go to fancy dress parties dressed as a shark.... Quite honestly, the novelty is wearing a little fin
- I was enjoying myself at a party when I noticed a few flies wearing wrist watches Time flies when you're having fun
- I hate it when a whole heap of people wearing cargo pants unexpectedly gather around me and get all excited. It's like "Boo! Khaki party!"
- A party was held for current and former actors where you had to come as your favourite musician. When Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked what he was going to wear, his response was I'll be Bach
- Dave was at a Halloween party with his wife last night.
His friend said to Dave , "That certainly is a frightening mask that your wife is wearing."
"She's not wearing a mask." replied Dave - Went to my Roman neighbour's 30th birthday party wearing practically nothing Won't be making THAT mistake again...
- A friend was having a Nirvana themed fancy dress party. I didn't know what to wear. He said 'Come as you are'
- What's the Republican Party's favorite Halloween costume? A ghost! They like it so much they wear it year round.
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Party Wear One Liners
Which party wear one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with party wear? I can suggest the ones about party and holiday party.
- What did the house wear to the party? Address.
- What does a house wear to a party? Address
- Why should you wear a burka to a party? You'll have a blast
- What does an owl wear to a party? An owlfit
- What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party? A boo-tie.
- What do ducks wear to party's?
A duck-sedo! - Why do women wear lipstick So you can see what they did to you after you leave the party
- Why did the elephant wear diapers to the birthday party? Because he was a party p**...!
Party Wear Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about party wear you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean fancy dress jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make party wear pranks.
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party in a bar.
When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned: "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.
"And why not, darling?", the father asked.
You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."
Yo mama so fat that she walked out to a party wearing heels and came back wearing flip-flops.
An ex-con goes out on a date...
So an ex-con is walking around the mall with his girlfriend after dinner, when they happen across a Jewelry store. The girlfriend eyes one of the necklaces on display in the window and says, "Wow, I'd sure love to have a necklace like that around my neck!" Nonchalantly, the ex-con smashes the window with a brick and hands his girlfriend the necklace, saying, "Anything for my baby."
They continue walking along and soon enough happen across a high-end clothing store. The girlfriend eyes one of the dresses on display in the window and says, "Wow, I'd sure love to have a dress like that to wear to parties!" Nonchalantly, the ex-con smashes the window with another brick and hands his girlfriend the dress, saying, "Anything for my baby."
They continue walking along and soon enough happen across a car dealership. The girlfriend eyes one of the Mercedes on display in the window and says, "Wow, I'd sure love to have that Mercedes to drive around town in!" The ex-con pauses and replies: "What? You think I'm made out of bricks?"
the greenhorn
A greenhorn comes from back east to try his hand at prospecting. He buys his gear and heads off into the hills. He has a couple of lonely weeks, with a little bit of success finding gold.
He's sitting by his campfire one evening when this crusty old prospector shows up and says "Howdy there, neighbor. My spot's just over the hill there. I wanted to invite you a party."
Greenhorn: "That sounds wonderful! I haven't seen a soul in weeks!"
Prospector: "I got to warn ya though...there's likely to be some dancin'!"
Greenhorn: "I love to trip the light fantastic! I'll bring my dancing shoes."
Prospector: "I got to warn ya...there'll be drinkin'!"
Greenhorn: "Oh, don't worry, I can hold my liquor."
Prospector: "There's likely to be some fiightin'."
Greenhorn: "I'm not inexperienced when it comes to fisticuffs!"
Prospector: "There'll be ... fornication."
Greenhorn: "Well...it is the Wild West...and I have not seen a lady in quite some time."
The prospector nods gruffly to himself and begins to leave. The greenhorn says, "Say, what should I wear to this soiree?"
The prospector pauses and says, "Oh, any old thing...it'll just be you and me."
Peace'n quiet in Auz
Tom had been in Police work for 25 years.
Finally sick of the stress, he quits his job and buys 50 acres of land in the hills in Tasmania as far from humanity as possible.
He sees the postman once a week and gets groceries once a month. Otherwise it's total peace and quiet.
After six months or so of almost total isolation, someone knocks on his door. He opens it and a huge, bearded man is standing there.
'Name's Cliff, your neighbor from forty miles up the road. Having a Christmas party Friday night. Thought you might like to come at about 5:00...'
'Great', says Tom, 'after six months out here I'm ready to meet some local folks thank you.'
As Cliff is leaving, he stops. 'Gotta warn you. Be some drinking'.'
'Not a problem' says Tom. 'After 25 years in the business, I can drink with the best of 'em'.
Again, the big man starts to leave and stops.
'More 'n' likely gonna be some fighting' too.'
'Well, I get along with people, I'll be all right! .
I'll be there. Thanks again.'
'More'n likely be some wild s**..., too,'
'Now that's really not a problem' says Tom, warming to the idea. 'I've been all alone for six months! I'll definitely be there.. By the way, what should I wear?'
'Don't much matter. Just gonna be the two of us.
An older man walks into a bar...
...wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phony beard. He sits down at a bar and orders a drink. As the bartender sets it down, he asks, "Going to a party?"
"Yeah, a costume party," the man answers, "I'm supposed to come dressed as my love life."
"But you look like Abe Lincoln," protests the bartender.
"That's right. My last four scores were seven years ago."
Alaskan retirement.
Jeff had been in business for 25 years. Finally sick of the stress,
he quits his job and buys 50 acres of land in Alaska as far from
humanity as possible. He sees the postman once a week and
gets groceries once a month. Otherwise it's total peace and
quiet.
After six months or so of almost total isolation, someone knocks
on his door. He opens it and a huge, bearded man is standing there.
"Name's Stan, your neighbor from forty miles up the road. Having
a Christmas party Friday night. Thought you might like to come at
about 5:00."
"Great", says Jeff, "after six months out here I'm ready to meet
some local folks. Thank you."
As Stan is leaving, he stops. "Gotta warn you. Be some
drinkin!"
"Not a problem" says Jeff. "After 25 years in the business, I can
drink with the best of 'em."
Again, the big man starts to leave and stops. "More 'n' likely
gonna be some fighting' too."
"Well, I get along with people, I'll be all right and, if not, I can
handle myself pretty well .....I'll be there. Thanks again."
"More'n likely be some wild s**..., too,"
"Now that's really not a problem" says Jeff, warming to the idea.
"I've been all alone for six months! I'll definitely be there. By the
way, what should I wear?"
"Don't much matter. Just gonna be the two of us."
Guy goes to a fancy dress party wearing dark-green Lycra and carrying a n**... woman on his back...
...
"What are you two supposed to be?" asks someone.
"Oh," he replies. "I'm a tortoise, and this is Michelle."
Guy gets sick of the rat race and...
....moves to the country. After about six months, he gets a little lonely for company so he's happy when a nearby farmer comes over.
They're sitting on the porch having a couple beers when the farmer asks,
*"Would you like to come to a party at my house next friday?"*
Guy says, *"sure, sounds fun."*
Farmer says, *"But there'll probably be loud music."*
Guy says, *"Cool with me."*
Farmer says, *"And a lot of drinking, that's how it is."*
Guy looks at his beer and nods his head.
Farmer says, *"Gotta watch out, sometimes there's a little fightin'."*
Guy says *"I can handle my own. Sounds fun."*
Farmer says, *"And if you're lucky, might be a little s**....."*
Guy says *"Now I can't wait. Next friday? What should I wear?"*
Farmer says, *"Whatever. Just gonna be you and me."*
A wealthy woman with a headache goes with her husband to a party.
After 20 minutes, she says, "Honey, I'm not feeling too well. You stay and have a nice time. I'll be at home waiting for you later.
She drives backs to her large home, walks upstairs, begins filling the tub, and walks into her bedroom. The butler is there.
She says to him, "Unbutton my shirt. Now, take it off. " He does. She says, "Take off my shoes and my skirt," so he does. She says, "Take off my bra." He complies. She says, "Now, I like you, and I won't say anything to my husband about this, but if I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you'll be fired."
Two women are talking at a cocktail party
One woman asks, "I noticed that you are wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger, do you usually wear it that way?"
"Yes."
The woman asks, "Why?"
"Because I married the wrong man."
A lady and her butler
A rich couple was going out for the evening. The lady of the house decided to give the butler, Throckmorton, the night off.
She said they would be home very late and he should just enjoy his evening.
As it turned out, the wife didn't have a good time at the party, so she came home early. She walked into the house and eyed Throckmorton sitting alone in the dining room. She called for him to follow her. She led him to the master bedroom. She closed and locked the door. She looked at him and smiled.
"Throckmorton. Take off my dress." He did so, carefully.
"Throckmorton. Take off my stockings and garter." He silently obeyed her.
"Throckmorton. Remove my bra and p**...." The tension mounted as he complied.
Finally she looked at him and said, "Throckmorton. If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired."
A rich woman feigns illness andbleavesba party early
When she gets home, she calls the butler to her bedroom.
"Jeeves? Take off my coat."
"Yes, madam."
"Jeeves, remove my high heels."
"Yes, madam."
"Jeeves, unzip my dress, and remove it...throw it on the floor!
"Yes, madam."
"Jeeves, remove my brassiere and p**...."
"Yes, madam."
"Jeeves?"
"Yes, madam?"
"If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired."
Joe moves into a new neighborhood
One day, he is outside. His neighbor comes over, introduces himself and says " I'm throwing a party tonight, why don't you come?"
Joe asks what kind of party it will be, and the neighbor tells him "This party is going to be awesome! There's gonna be beer, gambling, and TONS of s**...!"
"Sounds like a great party," replies Joe. "What should I wear?"
"It doesn't matter, man," says the neighbor. "It't just gonna be YOU and ME."
A Rich Woman And Her Butler
A rich couple was going out for the evening. The lady of the house decided to give the butler,
Throckmorton, the night off.
She said they would be home very late and he should just enjoy his evening.
As it turned out, the wife didn't have a good time at the party, so she came home early.
She walked into the house and eyed Throckmorton sitting alone in the dining room.
She called for him to follow her. She led him to the master bedroom.
She closed and locked the door. She looked at him and smiled.
"Throckmorton. Take off my dress." He did so, carefully.
"Throckmorton. Take off my stockings and garter." He silently obeyed her.
"Throckmorton. Remove my bra and p**...." The tension mounted as he complied.
Finally she looked at him and said,
"Throckmorton. If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired."
Ask Jeeves
A wealthy couple had planned to go out for the evening. The woman of the house decided to give their butler, Jerves, the rest of the night off. She said they would be home very late, and that he should just enjoy his evening.
As it turned out, however, the wife wasn't having a good time at the party, so she came home early, alone. Her husband had to stay with the others since several of his important clients were there.
As the woman walked into her house, she saw Jerves sitting by himself in the dining room. She called for him to follow her, and led him into the master bedroom. She then closed and locked the door.
She looked at him and smiled. "Jerves," she said, "take off my dress." He did this carefully. "Jerves," she continued, "take off my stockings and garter." He silently obeyed her. "Jerves," she then said, "remove my bra and p**...." As he did this, the tension continued to mount.
She looked at him and then said, "Jerves, if I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired!"
Halloween Joke
This guy goes to a Halloween costume party, but he's just wearing street clothes, and he has his girlfriend sitting on his shoulders.
The host says to him, Dude, this is a Halloween party! You're supposed to be wearing a costume?
The guy replies, I am wearing a costume! I'm a snail!
You're a snail?
Yeah, I'm a snail, says the guy. Then he points to his girlfriend and says, This is Michelle.
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
The other replied, Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.
I once met Bruce Willis
I once met Bruce Willis at a fancy dress party. He was wearing a really shabby looking nun outfit. I was told that he'd worn the same costume to every fancy dress party he'd attended for years. I suppose old habits die hard.
A funny true encounter
I was spending some time alone in an isolated cabin in the Ozarks. Not a neighbor for hundreds of meters. One day at around 9 p.m. I get a knock on the door, so I go to answer it. I see a large, p**... bellied man with a huge bushy beard.
"The name's Hank. I live just a mile down the road. I see you're new around here. I'm throwing a party tonight and I thought you might like to come."
"Sure, sounds great!" I said.
"There's gonna be drinking!"
"I can drink with the best of them!"
"There's gonna be fighting!"
"Sounds like fun!"
"There's gonna be some wild s**...!"
"Sweet! What should I wear?"
"It don't matter. Just gonna be the two of us."
My roommate dressed as a syringe for our Halloween house party.
He's upstairs with the s**... girl wearing the Courtney Love costume.
In the addict.
Classic r**... joke
Bill moves to Bama from Boston. He knocks on his r**... neighbor's door.
"Well, welcome to Bama, Bill. You come just in time. We's havin' a party tonight. Gonna be eatin' and drinkin', fightin' and f**...'."
Bill is excited, "Wow, what should I wear?"
r**... neighbor replies, "It don't matter - just gonna be the two of us."
Joe and his friends went to the costume party...
Joe and his friends went to the costume party and were really enjoying themselves.
Then a woman came in. She was wearing nothing at all, but was body-painted in white from head to toes.
The guys struggled to guess what that meant but after few drinks Joe gathered courage and went to ask.
"Excuse me, madam, we were wondering what are you dressed up as? Can you please tell us?"
The woman spreads her legs and says:
"Tooth decay, silly!"
A man goes to a costume party wearing nothing but his underwear and a woman on his back.
His friends see him and say, Hey man, what are you supposed to be?
He replies, Oh, I'm dressed as a turtle.
His friends respond, A turtle? How are you a turtle? Who's that woman on your back?
The man replies, Oh that's just Michelle.
A man walks into a costume party
Wearing nothing but underwear, and with a girl wrapped to his back with silver tape.
A friend of his welcomes him and asks "So... What are you dressed as?"
"I'm a turtle", answers the guy.
"And who is this on your back?"
"Oh, that's just Michelle."
(Probably a repost, I know, but the joke is just too good)
Last weekend I was accused of being dyslexic at a party...
I think they were just jealous of my goat costume, because nobody else put in *any* effort. For some reason they all decided to just wear bed sheets to the goat party.
Because a lot of folks were t**... and wearing masks at our b**... party I got in a lot of trouble
Wrong sub.
A husband and wife are getting ready for a costume party. Since they have nothing on hand to wear for the event, the husband suggests to his wife that she should put a lemon between her legs as he puts the potato between his. Confused, she asks what it's all about.
The husband says, "Honey, you be the sourpuss, and I'll be the dictator."
A priest was invited to attend a house party
.Naturally, he was properly dressed and wearing his priest's collar.
A little boy kept staring at him the entire evening. Finally, the priest asked the little boy what he was staring at. The little boy pointed to the priest's neck.
When the priest finally realized what the boy was pointing at, he asked him, "Do you know why I am wearing that?"
The boy nodded his head yes, and replied, "It kills fleas and ticks for up to three months."
John didn't wear the mask
**The dialog about John who didn't wear mask and regretted it and his friend**
\- John, put on your mask!
*- No! It's harmful.*
\- John put it on, what are you doing?
*- I ignore the masks*
\- John! Get out of here and don't ever come to a Halloween party looking like this again
**The end**
Guy goes to a fancy dress party in a green jumpsuit carry a woman by piggy back.....
Doorman: You can't come in mate, you're not in fancy dress
Guy: Yes I am, I'm a tortoise
Doorman: well I can see you're wearing green, but what's with the woman on your back?
Guy: That's Michelle....
A man comes home from a formal party with two black eyes
His roommate looks at him surprised and asks him how on earth it happened.
The man says there was a beautiful young woman wearing a formal gown at the party, and he noticed that her dress was riding up the crack of her b**....
"Obviously", he said, "that's embarrassing and I don't want her to walk around like that. So I pulled it out of her crack and she punched me in the face for it!"
"Okay, that explains the first black eye." Responds the roommate. "But what about the second one?"
The man says, "well, I figured she liked it there so I tucked it back in!"
I went to a Halloween party
I decided to dress as a clown. On my way to the party, a man in a suit stopped me. He said he was glad he finally found me. I had to explain that he must have me confused for somebody else, but he told me I was dressed like him. I explained that I was just wearing a costume, but he laughed it off as a joke. He then drags me into his car, and now I'm suddenly a member of Congress.