Partially Jokes
44 partially jokes and hilarious partially puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about partially that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Partially Short Jokes
Short partially jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The partially humour may include short slightly jokes also.
- my 14 year old came back with this after his biology class Q. who was the Jewish prophet that led the water molecules across the partially permeable membrane?
A. osmoses - Why did the partially blind man fall into the well? Because he could not see that well.
(My favorite repost for my cake day.) - Who did God send to help the slaves flee through the partially permeable membrane? Os-Moses.
- My Asian dad wasn't very happy when I told him I was gay. Especially the part when I said I liked D's.
Partial credit to /u/tosil - I think the doctor who amputated my legs is the best doctor in the world, but I admit I'm partial.
- Did you hear about the buffalo fossil excavation where they found partially digested mail bags in their stomachs? It turns out they were stamp eating across the Midwest.
- People ask why I never finish my paintings I remind them I am a black belt in partial arts!
- What fighting style does an amputee use? Partial arts
- I painted half a picture of Bruce Lee & quit: I'm a Partial Artist
- I never finish anything... I have a black belt in partial arts.
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Partially One Liners
Which partially one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with partially? I can suggest the ones about incomplete and completely.
- What do you call an amputee trying to do karate? Partial Arts.
- What do you call a 1 armed man who does karate? a Partial artist
- What do you call someone with no legs doing Karate? Partial Arts.
- What do you call an amputee learning karate? Partial arts
- Does Sean Connery like herb? Yes, but only partially.
- Why did the partially blind man fall into the well? He couldn't see that well.
- What do you call half an M&M ? Partial Mathers
- What is it called when an amputee does karate? Partial Arts
- What do you call an intestine that's been partially removed? A semicolon!
- What type of fighting technique do amputees practice? Partial arts.
- What do you call a paraplegic who does karate? Partial Arts.
- I heard that Sean Connery likes to cover his food in herbs. But only partially.
- Eclipse is an acronym * Eyes
* Cannot
* Look
* Into
* Partial
* Solar
* Eclipse - One legged man What does a one-legged man call karate?
Partial Arts - Why did the partially-blind farmer fall into the well? He didn't see that well.
Delightful Fun Partially Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about partially you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean halfway jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make partially pranks.
I'm introducing my girlfriend to my parents for the first time tonight
I told my girlfriend my parents were partially deaf, so she has to speak loud and slow. I told my parents my girlfriend is r**........this should be an interesting night.
A pirate walks into a bar...
A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel tucked partially under his hat. The bartender says to him, "Oi, what's that?" The pirate responds, "Aargggh, I've got a bounty on me head."
I read this joke in a 1974 p**... magazine today.
An elderly man died and went to purgatory. There he ran into a friend his age, who is accompanied by a luscious young blonde. "I'm happy for you, Steve", said the new arrival. "At least you're getting a partial reward in this place while you expiate your sins."
"She isn't my reward", sighed Steve, "I'm her punishment!"
Blonde genies
A guy is walking along a beach when he comes across a lamp partially buried in the sand. He picks up the lamp and gives it a rub.
Two blonde genies appear, and they tell him he has been granted three wishes. The guy makes his three wishes and the blonde genies disappear.
The next thing the guy knows, he's in a bedroom, in a mansion, surrounded by 50 beautiful women. He makes love to all of them and begins to explore the house.
Suddenly he feels something soft under his feet. He looks down and notices the floor is covered in $100 bills.
Next, there's a knock at the door, so he answers it.
Standing there are two persons dressed in Ku Klux k**... outfits. They drag him outside to the nearest tree, throw a rope over a sturdy limb, and hang him by the neck until he's dead.
As the k**... are walking away, they remove their hoods.
It's the two blonde genies!
One blonde genie says to the other, "I can understand the first wish--having all those beautiful women in a big mansion to make love to.
I can also understand him wanting to be a millionaire.
But, why he wanted to be hung like a black man is beyond me!"
A New Study Conducted on Asians (A joke I came up with,but still not sure if a repost)
A new study conducted on Asians shows that the long held to be true stereotype is partially false. In fact, only 50% of Asians have small p**....
The other 50% are women.
Artificial Intelligence is really taking over our jobs, man.
Just today, I asked Siri to change the tv channel, and it ended up calling my mother.
Siri has now replaced my partially deaf grandma.
Nuns
Sitting behind a couple of nuns at a baseball game, whose headgear partially blocked the view, three men decided to badger the nuns in an effort to get them to move. In a very loud voice, the first guy said, "I think I'm going to move to Utah, there are only 100 nuns living there." The second guy spoke up and said, "I want to go to Montana, there are only 50 nuns living there." The third guy said, "I want to go to Idaho, there are only 25 nuns living there." One of the nuns turned around, looked at the men, and in a very sweet, calm, voice said, "Why don't you go to h**.... There aren't any nuns there."
Action Composers
All the action heroes are at Stalone's house when their phones all go off. Their agents give them news about a new action movie focused on the great composers. After the call they are all talking about who they would like to play.
Stalone: I'm not going to be in it if I can't be Mozart.
Statham: I'm rather partial to Beethoven myself.
Jet Li: Chopin!
Everyone having had their turn they turn to Schwarzeneggar who is straight up not interested in the project.
Arnold: No! This is a dumb movie.
Everyone: Come on...
Arnold: Fine! I'll be Bach.
Two functions walk down the street
Two functions walk down the street, 5 and e^x. They see Derivative walking towards them. 5 freaks out, screaming Oh no! Oh no! Derivative is going to come up and operate on me, and then I'll be zero - Oh no!! e^x smugly walks up to Derivative and says, Ha! I'm e^x. You can operate on me all you want and I'll still be e^x. You can't touch me. Derivative looks up, raises an eyebrow, and responds, Oh yeah? I'm partial, with respect to Y.
A man wakes up the mental ward
Relax, sir, you've just had ECT.
What's that?
Electrical shock therapy. After a shock to the brain, you have temporary partial memory loss. Patients often forget about the things that cause them stress and tension, allowing to them to relax and get better.
Okay.
Now that you're awake, I'll call your wife in...
My what?