Parks Jokes
85 parks jokes and hilarious parks puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about parks that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Jokes about parks and recreation, national parks, Disney parks, and more are all here! Find yourself laughing out loud at park-related jokes you might not have heard before, with a few classic standbys thrown in. Get ready to be entertained with frisbee-related puns, witty remarks about collateral damage, and more!
Quick Jump To
- Short Parks Jokes
- Parks One Liners
- Parks Recreation Jokes
- Parks Rent Jokes
- National Parks Jokes
- Disney Parks Jokes
- Parks And Rec Jokes
- More Parks Jokes
Funniest Parks Short Jokes
Short parks jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The parks humour may include short national park jokes also.
- Man: Doctor, all five of my boys want to be valets when they grow up! Doctor: Wow! That's the worst case of parking son's disease that I have ever seen.
- Monopoly is fun but it has some really old stuff that isn't valid anymore. There's free parking, a luxury tax and rich people can actually go to jail.
- Why are women so bad at parking cars? Because for the last 200 years they've been told that three inches are actually six.
- A company owner was asked a question, How do you motivate your employees to be so punctual?"
He smiled & replied, "It's simple. I have 30 employees and 29 free parking spaces. One is paid parking." - After my dad died, I went to his favorite park to scatter his remains A park employee came running, yelling "STOP! You cant do that here!"
I said "Why not?"
He said "You have to cremate him first!" - I really love playing chess with elderly people in the park. It's just really hard to find thirty two of them willing to do it .
- Dating in your 30s is like looking for a parking spot... The good ones are all taken. The rest are either handicapped or too far away.
- Yesterday I saw two teenagers making out in the park, reminds me of my teenage days…. reminds me of my teenage days when I used to see other teenagers make out in the park
- Where would you park your camel? The Camelot.
PS Booze helped with this and now I'm laughing alone in my apartment - What's big, black and loaded with aids? A new Cadillac Escalade with cruise control, lane alert, navigation, downhill descent control and parking assist.
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Parks One Liners
Which parks one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with parks? I can suggest the ones about central park and theme park.
- Hey girl, are you a parked car in July? Because I want to leave a baby in you.
- Being a dog walker is so easy It's a literal walk in the park.
- What's better than being able to use disabled parking spots? Legs
- A cat gives birth in a public park... ...and is fined $50 for littering.
- How does Santa know if he lands on a Jewish house? There's a parking meter on the roof.
- Got a parking ticket yesterday. Not sure why. The sign said fine for parking.
- Saw two druggies having a '69' in the park earlier on. He was on crack, she was on blow.
- i got complimented on my driving earlier they left a note on the car saying parking fine
- Fifty clowns got fired from the circus. Luckily, it freed up three parking spots.
- What I deal with as a parking attendant… It's a lot.
- Someone complimented my parking today! They left a little note that said "parking fine".
- I like to play chess with old bald men in the park But it's hard to find 32 of them
- Wanna hear a joke about a parking ticket? No??
FINE. - What do you do when you see a space man? Park the car, man.
- My GF begged me to stop singing Linkin Park I tried so hard.
Parks Recreation Jokes
Here is a list of funny parks recreation jokes and even better parks recreation puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My friend, upon hearing that Chris Pratt will be in the new Jurassic World film... Are you looking forward to Jurassic Parks and Recreation?
- They rebuilt our amusement park after it burned down. It's now called the recreation park.
Parks Rent Jokes
Here is a list of funny parks rent jokes and even better parks rent puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- The game monopoly is fin, but has some major out of date stuff. There's free parking, a luxury tax, you can actually afford to pay rent, and rich people can actually go to jail.
National Parks Jokes
Here is a list of funny national parks jokes and even better national parks puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I parked in three different handicap parking spots last week. No ticket, and no dirty looks. Apparently the "MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN" bumper sticker is accepted nation wide now.
- What did the dad say after dropping his son off at yellowstone National Park? Bison!
- Which US national park is most welcoming to Hebrews? Yosemite!
- What do you call a racist who hates national parks? An anti-Yosemite.
- If Chippendales goes to a national park and rescues the park rangers.. Would the headline in the newspaper be Chippendales rescue rangers?
- A hunter is arrested for murdering 9 people at a national park... His argument? "Someone told me it was 'tourist season.'"
- What happens when you get punched by Italian Wilderness? You get A Bruise O' National Park.
- We went camping at Yellowstone National Park on a moonless night. It was in tents.
- What national park is also a Chanukah greeting? Yosemite.
- This joke is for all you Spanish speakers What do you get when you cross a National Park with the ice age?
Hielostone
Disney Parks Jokes
Here is a list of funny disney parks jokes and even better disney parks puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you get when you cross bean sprouts, peanut sauce and a Disney water park? Thai-food legume
Parks And Rec Jokes
Here is a list of funny parks and rec jokes and even better parks and rec puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Did you hear about the guy from Parks & Rec who crashed his plane? It was comic Aziz.
Cheeky Parks Jokes that Will Make You and Your Friends Chuckle
What funny jokes about parks you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean water park jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make parks pranks.
Crime on multi-story car parks,
it's wrong on so many levels.
My friend said this. Not sure if it was original or not but i have to share it.
"Whenever someone calls shot gun I call rosa Parks and sit in shotgun anyway."
A cop parks at the bottom of a bridge, waiting for a speeder. He pulls a man over for doing 40 over the speed limit, and says, "Son, I've been waiting for you all day."
The man quickly responds, "Well, I got here as fast as I could!"
Who always wins at musical chairs?
Rosa Parks
So this wealthy lawyer parks his Rolls-Royce on a busy street
and as he opens his door, a truck come screaming by and tears off the car door. The guy jumps out and yells, "My car! My beautiful car!" and a man standing nearby says, "you pig, you're so worried about your expensive car that you didn't even notice that your arm's missing too!" Hearing that, the lawyer yells, "Oh God, my Rolex!"
Why should you not let your kids go to Korean Discos?
Because you don't want them hanging around Parks at night.
It's the same old story; boy meets girl in park...
... boy parks meat in girl
Rosa Parks is a bad role model...
she did not stand up for her rights
Did you know that Rosa Parks died because...
She refused to get in the back of an ambulance
A man parks his car on the street and goes into a shop....
...When he comes out, the car is not where he left it and apparently was stolen. So he calls the police and hopelessly goes back home. Two days later, he finds his car at his front door, with a note left in:
I am very sorry but I had to borrow your car, because my wife was in labor and about to give birth and I had to act quickly. I deeply apologize and send these front-row concert tickets for you and your wife to enjoy this tuesday evening.
So the man and his wife go to the concert tuesday evening. When they return home, they realize someone broke in and the house was burgled. And a note was left on the floor: Soo, did you like the concert?
Sorry for the terrible grammar :D
What happens when Mario parks his car outside the wrong castle?
He gets Toad
Young Love
A guy and his girl go out on a date, then he drives to a scenic point, parks the car and tries to get amorous. The girl stops him with a "Why don't we just talk..."
The guy counters. "If I wanted to talk, I'd be out with my best friend".
The girl says "If I wanted to make out, *I'd* be out with your best friend".
Did you hear about a guy who collected memorabilia of Rosa Parks, Florence Nightingale, Joan of Arc, and Wonder Woman?
Apparently, he was a heroine addict.
What does a Jamaican do when he sees a spaceman?
He parks his car, man.
The Date
A man drives his date up to lovers lane and parks. "I have to be honest with you" the woman says as the guy makes his move."I`m a h**...".
The man thinks about this for a bit and decides he`s ok with it. He agrees to pay her $25 and they go at it.
After they finish, the guy says,
"Now I should be honest too. I`m a cab driver and its going to cost you $25 to get back to town".
Dear protestors,
Rosa parks refused to give up her seat on the bus, she didn't trash it. There's a difference.
Pls don't crucify me
A man parks in a handicapped spot
One day a man parks in a handicapped spot. An elderly woman woman drives up from behind, beeps the man and says "young man your not disabled, you should not be parking here".
The man replies "did you just assume my gender".
"Oh my mistake" says the woman
What does a s**... do if he sees a spaceman?
He parks in it, dude.
When a frog parks illegaly,
They get toad.
Your hairline is so far back
That even Rosa Parks sat in front of it.
A small boy parks his bicycle nearby the Parliament house and walks on...
A police constable stops him and asks: "Why did you park your bicycle here? Don't you know about this road? Many politicians pass from here".
The boy innocently replies, "Don't worry, I have locked my bicycle".
Why is Korea the greenest county in the world?
It's full of Parks.
A man parks his car. As he is getting out a traffic warden walks up and says, "I'm sorry sir, you can't park your car here." .....
...."Yes I can" says the man. "The sign there says, 'Fine for Parking'!"
My boss told me to make a PowerPoint presentation about water parks.
There's loads of slides.
What's the difference between tinder and amusement parks?
Amusement parks have realistic height requirements.
I did an ancestry.com family history today and found out that my great grandfather helped Rosa Parks initiate the civil rights movement
He was the guy who said, "Get up, that's my seat."
Penguin driving home has car trouble...
A penguin driving home when his car begins to overheat. He parks at a garage and the mechanic says it will be a little bit before he can look at it.
The penguin decides to go across the street and get ice cream. The penguin slops ice cream all over himself from head to toe and returns to the mechanic. The mechanic comes out and says well it looks like you've blown a seal.
The penguin says no it's ice cream, honest.
Rosa Parks
But does she drive?
Crime in multi-storey car parks.
Crime in multi-storey car parks...
That is wrong on so many different levels.
A small boy parks his bike near the senate and walks on...
.. A policeman stops him and asks: 'Why did you park your bike here? Don't you know about this road? Many important politicians, cabinet members, even the President and other such politicians pass through here..'
The boy replied innocently: Don't worry, I have locked my bike.'
A poem to Rosa Parks
Rosa is red
Bus driver -- blue
Front of the bus?
Don't mind if I do.
How are car parks like unplanned pregnancies
Accidents happen when people don't pull out carefully.
What do you call it when one gene parks in line with another?
Par*allele* parking
England has car parks everywhere: McDonalds, Stadiums...
the M25
Your hairline is so far back
Rosa parks don't wanna sit there.
Which country has the highest number of parks?
...
North Korea and South Korea.
Did you hear about the new spin-off/crossover series starring Chris Pratt?
It's called Parks and Rex
just droppin this here
What happens when a frog parks illegally.
It gets toad
Everyone keeps talking about how Rosa Parks stood up for civil rights.
I thought the whole point was that they DIDN'T stand up??
A man parks his car in a 'disabled parking' spot when a traffic policeman shows up.
'Well well well sir,' says the policeman while getting his coupon book 'what is your handicap that allows you to park here?'
After a brief moment of thinking the man awnsers: 'Tourette's sydrome, c**...!'
Why don't people in trailer parks invest in the stock market?
Because their money is t**... in bonds.
What happens when a frog illegally parks?
It gets toad!
What do you call Spiderman when he parks his car?
Peter Parker
A young man goes to a formal ball in Boston.
He parks his car, goes up to the venue, and he has a great time. He meets a young woman there, and the two of them hit it off.
I came here on the bus, she says, Would you mind giving me a ride home?
So obviously he says yes, and the two of them leave the venue together. When they get to his car, the man goes up and presses his leg against the car door, and the car immediately opens up!
The girl asks, Wow, how did you do that?
What do you mean? the man says, These are my khakis.
What does a s**... do when he sees a space man?
He parks in it, man.
Which country in the world has most Parks?
Korea
Guy was driving in the outback.
He decides he needs a break and finds a bar off the beaten track and parks his truck..
He goes i and was confronted by a lot off p**... up bikers.
They started insulting him, so he had one beer then left.
The bikers started shouting, he was not such of a man was he.?
The barman said not much of a driver either, he has just run over 21 motorcycles.
Married couple during hard financial times....
A man and his wife are having hard financial times and decide that the husband will p**... the wife out.
The man parks and waits while his wife goes around the corner to stir up business.
At the end of the night, the wife comes back to the car, and her husband asks how much she made.
"$100 and 50 cents," the wife says.
"That's great," replies the husband. "But who paid the 50 cents?"
"All of them."
What do people who live in trailer parks and spiders have in common?
The males are usually only half the females size.
So a cowboy parks his horse at the saloon, ties him to the outside, kisses him on the a**..., and walks in to have a stiff drink.
The bar keeper saw this happen, and he just had to ask. "Why'd ya kiss your horse on the a**... before coming in? You got s**... all over your lips!" The cowboy, cool as can be, takes a stiff drink before answering. "It's 'cuz I got chapped lips." The bartender was even more confused; "Horse manure helps with chapped lips?"
"Nah," says the cowboy. "But it keeps me from lickin' 'em"
Before Chuck Norris goes sleep, he checks under his bed for Volodymyr Zelensky.
Tornadoes don't exist, Volodymyr Zelensky just hates trailer parks.
Chuck Norris jokes but instead of Chuck Norris it's Volodymyr Zelensky.
A man parks his car in the Red Square in Soviet Russia
A policeman rushes over and yells: "Why are you parking here? Do you know where this is? This is the government's place!"
The man replies: "I know, don't worry, the lock on my car is really good"
A man parks a beat up, rusty Plymouth right in front of the Capitol. One of the guards walks up to him and says: "Sir, please move this vehicle. This is the Capitol Hill, congressmen, senators and even the President frequent this area."
The Plymouth driver replies "I ain't scared, I got an alarm!"
