Paranoia Jokes
46 paranoia jokes and hilarious paranoia puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about paranoia that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Paranoia Short Jokes
Short paranoia jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The paranoia humour may include short paranoid jokes also.
- I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia. She whispered: "They're right behind you."
- A man walks into a library and asks where he can find books on paranoia. The librarian whispers, "They're right behind you!"
- A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for books about paranoia. She whispers, "They're right behind you!"
- I went to the library and asked the librarian if she knew where books on paranoia were. She said "They're right behind you".
- I asked the librarian if books about paranoia were available. She looked up and whispered, They're right behind you.
- For those of you with feelings of paranoia that you are being watched: I want you to know that you are not alone.
- I asked the librarian if the library had any books on paranoia. She leaned over and whispered, "They're right behind you. . ."
- I asked the librarian if they had any books on paranoia. She whispered, "they're right behind you!"
- In the library: "Excuse me, where are the books about paranoia?"
"They are... right behind you." - A woman walks up to a librarian and asks them where the books on paranoia are They reply: they're right behind you
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Paranoia One Liners
Which paranoia one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with paranoia? I can suggest the ones about paradox and anxiety.
- To everyone suffering from paranoia, let me just tell you: You are not alone.
- I just wanna say to all people suffering from Paranoia You are not alone
- To all the people out there suffering from paranoia... ...just remember, you're not alone
- I just called the paranoia hotline. A guy answered, How did you get this number?!
- To all the people struggling with paranoia Don't worry you're not alone
- I've just been diagnosed with paranoia and constipation. I'm scared shitless.
- What is the opposite of paranoia? Thinking you are following someone.
- My doctor told me that I suffer from paranoia. I think someone paid him to say it.
- if you have paranoia. Just remember... You aren't alone...
- My doctor said I am suffering from paranoia and constipation I'm scared shitless
- To everyone out there suffering from paranoia… …Just remember you're not alone.
- To those of you suffering from paranoia Just remember you are not alone
- The influencer was diagnosed with paranoia. He believed nobody was following him.
- People with paranoia Just remember, you're not alone
- Where are people with paranoia sent to? the ICU
Happy Paranoia Jokes for a Lighthearted Night with Friends
What funny jokes about paranoia you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean phobia jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make paranoia pranks.
Son: Daddy, what is the difference between paranoia and schizophrenia?
Dad: Paranoia is when you go to the toilet, when your home alone, and lock the door behind you. And schizophrenia is when somebody knocks.
So I walked into Library at lunchtime and asked the lady if they have any books on paranoia
She said "They're behind you"...
A man walked into a library and asked if they had any books on paranoia
So the librarian replied "They're right behind you."
My wife just left me because of my anxiety and paranoia.
Nevermind, she just returned from the shops.
A lady walked into the library and asked the Liberian if she had any books on paranoia
To which she responded in a hushed tone- They're right behind you
My doctor diagnosed me with paranoia yesterday
Well that's not what he said, but I could tell he was thinking it
Thank you for calling the Psychiatric Institute of Mental Health
If you have an obsessive-compulsive disorder, please press button 1. Again. And again. And again.
If you have a multiple personality disorder press in rapid sequence keys 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you suffer from paranoia, we have to inform you that we already know who you are, what you do in life, and what you want from us. Please stay on the phone while we trace your call.
If you suffer from hallucinations, press the 7 on the big pink telephone that you, and only you, see at your immediate right.
If you are suffer from chizophrenia, please kindly ask your imaginary friend to press the 8 key for you.
If you suffer from depression, it doesn't matter which key you press, as there is nothing to do: yours is a basket case, and there is no cure.
If you suffer from amnesia, press keys in rapid sequence 2, 7, 5, 3, 9 5, 7, 5, 1, 6, 4, 9 and repeat out loud, in the following order, your name, surname, home address, mobile number, e-mail, social security number, bank account number, ATM pin code, date of birth, marital status, place of birth and your grandmother's maiden name.
If you suffer from indecision, leave your message before, after, or during the beep.
If you suffer from short-term memory loss press 0.
If you suffer from short-term memory loss press 0.
If you suffer from short-term memory loss press 0.
If you suffer from obsessive avarice we have to inform you that this call costs 500 euros per minute.
If you suffer from low self-esteem, keep waiting: all our operators are busy responding to people who are much more important than you.
If you are one of the Italians that voted for Berlusconi, please hang up. We cure the crazy, not the jerks.
I called the paranoia society hotline this morning…
The operator answered and said, "How did you get this number?!"
The doctor asked his patient Do you experience any signs of paranoia?
The patient responded No. Why? Who told you to ask that??
A man asks the librarian if they have any books on paranoia
She says, yes they're behind you.
