Parallel Jokes

89 parallel jokes and hilarious parallel puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about parallel that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

If you love parallel jokes, then you will want to read this article! Learn about jokes that involve parallel parking, parallel universes, parallel lines, axes, teammates and galactic jokes. Find out the funniest ones and how to tell them effectively. Don't miss out on an opportunity for comedic success!

Quick Jump To

Funniest Parallel Short Jokes

Short parallel jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The parallel humour may include short alternate jokes also.

  1. I don't really believe in parallel universes. But there could be a version of me who does.
  2. How do you stop serial killers? Just arrest one of them, and all of them stop.
    This wouldn't work if they were parallel killers.
  3. What is worse than a serial killer A parallel killer, who kills multiple people at once, instead of one at a time
  4. Why does Tom Holland never drive? Because Andrew and Tobey are more experienced parallel Parkers
  5. Why'd the alternate universe Spider-Man do so well on his driving test? He's an excellent parallel Parker.
  6. My Engineering teacher asked me to find the torque caused by two equal and opposite parallel forces So I said Okay, give me a couple moments.
  7. Why can't women get close to the curb when they parallel park? Because they're constantly lied to about what 8 inches is.
  8. Two magnetic fields are talking to each other Magnetic field 1: "Aren't you mad that all the coils above you are parallel to your magnetic field?"
    Magnetic Field 2: "Nope...I give zero flux!"
  9. Why are women so bad at parallel parking? Because men have been trying to convince them that 3 inches is 6 inches since the beginning of time.
  10. My old car's steering started to shake so bad I can barely park it on the street. The mechanic says it has Parallel Parkinsons.

Share These Parallel Jokes With Friends

Parallel One Liners

Which parallel one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with parallel? I can suggest the ones about pairs and multiple.

  1. Why does spiderman hate driving with his evil twin? Because he's a bad parallel Parker
  2. Why did Spider-Man's evil twin fail his driver's test? He was a bad parallel Parker.
  3. Parallel lines have got so much in common. It's a shame they'll never get to meet.
  4. Two parallel lines match on tinder But they never meet!
  5. Parallel lines have so much in common. It's a shame they'll never meet.
  6. What do you call it when one gene parks in line with another? Par*allele* parking
  7. Why did spiderman's evil twin fail is diver's test Because he was a bad parallel parker
  8. My true love and I are like parallel lines. We will never meet and I will die alone.
  9. Parallell lines have so much in common Too bad they'll never meet
  10. What's more dangerous than a serial killer? A parallel killer.
  11. Why won't the Jedi use parallel bars? Because only the Sith deal in |absolutes|.
  12. What did one parallel line say to the other? It's a shame we'll never meet.
  13. A step-by-step guide on how to parallel park! 1) Park somewhere else.
  14. What's the worst part of parallel parking? The witnesses.
  15. Parallel lines have soo much in common It's a shame they'll never meet  ¯\\\_(ツ)_/¯

Parallel Parking Jokes

Here is a list of funny parallel parking jokes and even better parallel parking puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Parallel Parking They say that the worst problem with parallel parking is the witnesses.
    But if you are really bad at it, you can eliminate that problem.
  • Why are women so bad at parallel parking? Because they're constantly being lied to about what six inches looks like.
  • My car is so fast that it smacked into a bug and killed it... While I was parallel parking.
  • What do you call two Korean guys standing next to each other? Parallel Park
  • I got honked at while trying to parallel park today. Yeah, like the goose could do it any better.
  • I love parallel parking It's the only time my wife ever tells me I'm in too deep.
  • Why couldn't the old aardvark parallel park? He just wanted to curl up and Pi.
  • Why are so many girls bad at parallel parking? Because for years their boyfriends have been telling them the four inches they have is nine inches.
  • What is the proper way to parallel park? Park somewhere else.
  • Why do women have a hard time parallel parking? They are consistently lied to about what eight inches looks like.

Parallel Universe Jokes

Here is a list of funny parallel universe jokes and even better parallel universe puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I actually come from a parallel universe where Earth was destroyed by Larry the Cable Guy. We called the event Arma-Git-R-Done.
  • No matter how improbable, there's a parallel universe with anything you can think of. Even one where the Irish invented rap. It's how the universe achieves Homie O'Stasis
  • I'm sick and tired of scandals always being named -gate The only thing about it that consoles me is there's a parallel universe where Watergate Hotel was instead named after John Hancock.
  • A man walks into a parallel universe and sits down at the bar. In comes a priest, a rabbi and a minister
  • I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
  • What's the most popular parallel universe among the Spaniards? Realm Adrid.
  • Somewhere in a parallel universe programmer van Rython invented Possum programming language.
  • In a parallel universe where chefs are called food composers... The best pasta sonata was composed by platehoven.
  • Black Holes are places where parallel universes are hiding from Chuck Norris.
  • Across all of the infinite number of parallel universes the version of Chuck Norris is the same.
    Nature knows perfection when she sees it.
Parallel joke

Parallel Line Jokes

Here is a list of funny parallel line jokes and even better parallel line puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • You and your soulmate are like two parallel lines. You have so much in common.
    It's a shame you'll never meet.
  • Some people are like parallel lines Identical personalities but will never meet
  • What are parallel lines ? They are vegetarians because they never meat.
  • Parallel lines have so many similarities... ...It's a shame they'll never meet!
  • Parallel lines have so much in common, but this plane is non-euclidean so I can't come up with a good punchline
  • Parallel lines have so much in common... Just like my parents, but they're still divorced.
  • Two parallel lines have so much in common Its a shame that.....
Parallel joke, Two parallel lines have so much in common

Parallel Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter

What funny jokes about parallel you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pare jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make parallel pranks.

Dave and John are playing a round of golf...

Dave is lining up his put on the 8th green when they hear a car coming along the road that runs parallel to the course. Upon seeing a hearse, Dave stands away from his ball, takes his cap off and bows his head until it passes.
"That was very decent of you Dave."
"Yea, she was a good wife."

Math tells us three of the saddnest love stories

1)Tangent lines who had one chance to meet and then parted forever.
2)Parallel lines who were never meant to meet.
3)Asymptotes who can get closer and closer but will never be together.

Gf just passed her driving test

My girlfriend had just passed her driving test so she drove me to town.
It was packed but we managed to find a space but she was nervous about doing a parallel park.
"I'm confident in you babe just do what you did in the test" I said
She slowly started unziping my flies.

How to tell time in a forest

Here's how to tell time in a forest.
Try and face north, or make your best approximation as to which way is north. Stand straight and tall. Extend both arms so that they are parallel with the ground. Lower your left arm back down to your side. Bend your right arm so that your hand is against the left side of your chest. Now lower your chin to your chest and look at your watch.

Why did the chicken cross the 38th parallel?

Because North Korea's long range missiles can't reach that far

Explaining a joke is like dissecting a frog.

You understand it better, but it dies in the process.
See what I did there was use the frog as an analogy to show that exposing the inner workings of a joke would essentially deprive it of its life in that it's not funny anymore. I'm drawing a parallel (and so is E. B. White) to how you basically kill a frog when dissecting it to better understand the functioning of its inner body parts, since there is now little left in the joke to laugh at.

There are 3,141,592 parallel universes where I have s**... with yo momma..

Strangely enough in every single one of them she's so fat...

There's a parallel universe where people age non-linearly, and every day you have no idea how old you'll wake up.

So sometimes you'd have to call into work like, Sorry, can't make it in today, I'm 6.

If I needed to climb something and I had to choose between a rope with knots in it or some parallel boards with spaced rungs...

I'd choose the latter.

Frisbees and The Sun

I was trying to figure out why the frisbee kept getting bigger, and then it hit me.
I was up all night trying to figure out where the Sun went, and then it dawned on me.
You might be saying "wait, Reaver, these jokes are both headed in the same direction!" That is so! I wanted to share with you guys a parallels!

My friend betrayed me on the test when I asked him where the light rays parallel to the principle axis of a concave mirror meet

I mean, he did try to motivate me by shouting "Focus! Focus!", but that hardly helps.

Parallel joke, What is worse than a serial killer

jokes about parallel