Paper Route Jokes
8 paper route jokes and hilarious paper route puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about paper route that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Paper Route Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good paper route joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
An elderly gentleman was on his deathbed as his wife and three children and nurse stood close by
Then he spoke: Bill, you take the Beverly Hills houses. Mary, you take the offices in the Center Center. Debra, the apartments over the L.A. Plaza are yours. To my dear wife, take all the residential buildings near downtown.
The nurse was really impressed. She said, Your husband must have been quite a man, amassing so much property to leave to all of you.
And the wife responded, What property? … the s**... had a paper route!!
What does the Starship Enterprise and toilet paper have in common?
They're both en route to uranus to wipe out the klingons
Paper boy couldn't finish his paper route
He ran out of Times
Did you hear about the kidnapping down the road?
His mother woke him up for lunch.
Source (Told to me 30 yrs ago by an old farmer on my paper route.)
Does anyone remember that show where Ron Howard was a kid with a paper route?
Probably not. Opie delivered.
A man is lying on his death bed...
And he decides to share his will.
"My daughter, you get the high rises," he says,
"My son, you get everything south of the river," he says,
"And my wife, you get everything else."
Then he dies.
After this, the nurse says to his wife, "Wow, that sure was a lot of properties.
The wife says, "Properties? That was his paper route!"
A father is lying on his death bed...
A father is lying on his death bed with his three sons and wife surrounding him. He says to the first son, Now that I'm passing I want you to take all the houses I have on the east side of Main Street.
He points to the second son and says, And you will have all the houses on the west side of Main Street.
Lastly he points to the third son and says, You will have the entire apartment complex at the end of the Main Street.
The nurse, having overheard the conversation, leans into the wife and says, Wow, your husband must have been a hugely successful person.
The wife responds, oh yeah, a *real* success. The j**... is talking about his paper route.
Nort!
Leaving school late one day, a boy rushed home for dinner. Knowing he would not be on time taking the usual route, he sought a shortcut through a large fenced field. Well past sunset, he hopped the fence and began to pick his way through the darkened expanse. About halfway through the field he heard a voice:
"Nort" it said.
The boy paused, and squinting his eyes, called "...yes...?"
Hearing no response, the boy continued on in darkness.
Again, but closer this time, he heard the voice. "Nort! Nort!"
"Yes? Hello? Do I know you?" asked the boy.
Sadly, the boy was not to return home that evening. News of his fate headlined the morning paper:
'Local boy Norton Norbert gored to death by harelip bull.'
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