Paper Plate Jokes
7 paper plate jokes and hilarious paper plate puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about paper plate that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Paper Plate Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good paper plate joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do the majority of the people in the UK and a paper plate have in common?
They're both w**....
I'm so poor...
I just rinsed off a paper plate.
Hey! Are these plates free?
No, sorry they're paper plates
Wife: These paper plates are bent.
Me: When you order from Amazon, shipping happens.
An elderly couple see a doctor about how to deal with their short term memory loss.
The doctor says to help them remember certain things they should write it down on a piece of paper. One night the couple is watching TV, when the husband starts walking to the kitchen. His wife asks "Can you bring me some strawberries?"
"Sure."
"Aren't you going to write it down so you don't forget?"
"No no. It's fine."
"Well I also want some whip cream. You should write it down so you'll remember."
"Don't worry. I've got it."
"I also want some chocolate syrup on top. You *really* should write it down, dear."
"I got it. Strawberries, whip cream, and chocolate syrup."
The wife sighs as her husband disappears into the kitchen.
After 15 minutes the husband finally comes back carrying a plate of eggs, bacon, and sausage. The wife looks up at him and asks "Where's my toast?"
The orchestra's new trumpet player
A local orchestra's trumpet player just died of old age. They start auditions so they can find a new one.
The judges call in the first candidate. He walks in wearing a beautifully tailored dark tuxedo. He pulls out an incredibly expensive trumpet. His trumpet case is lined with red velvet. He brings the gold plated instrument up to his mouth and starts playing.
And wow, he's terrible. The judges cringe as he clumsily stumbles through a few messy runs. Nearly everything he plays is hideously out of tune. They send him away and bring in the next candidate.
This guy looks exactly opposite from the other guy. His hair is messy. He hasn't showered in weeks. His beard has food particles in it. He opens a crumpled brown paper bag and pulls out a rusty trumpet. He shakily puts the instrument to his lips and starts playing.
And man, *he was worse.*
An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician
An engineer wakes up one night and sees a fire in his wastebasket. Panicking, he leaps out of bed in only his robe and slippers, kicks over the wastebasket, and stomps out the flames, spreading ash and cinders all over his bedroom.
A physicist wakes up one night and sees a fire in his wastebasket. A bit startled, he hurries to the kitchen and returns with a large dinner plate. He places the plate over the wastebasket and waits for the fire to extinguish.
A mathematician wakes up one night and sees a fire in his wastebasket. Coolly, he sits down at his desk with a pen and paper and scribbles some formulas. He scratches out his work, then lights a cigarette and sits back to consider. Suddenly thoughtful, he looks at the glass of water sitting on his desk. He takes one last drag from his cig, then drops it in the glass and watches it go out. "Aha!" he exclaims, "a solution exists!" and then returns to bed.
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