Pakistani Jokes
103 pakistani jokes and hilarious pakistani puns to laugh out loud. Read places jokes about pakistani that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Hello, young readers! Have you ever heard of Pakistani jokes? These are jokes or funny stories from Pakistan, a country that’s rich with tradition, culture, and a vibrant sense of humor. Just like how every family, every city, and every country has its own special set of inside jokes, Pakistan has its unique brand of humor too! As we go through this interesting collection of Pakistani jokes, remember that humor is a universal language, everyone can understand!
What are Pakistani Jokes?
Pakistani jokes are funny stories, witty comments or one-liners that originated from Pakistan. They might make fun of the different dialects, the unique food habits, or the everyday experiences that are specific to people living in Pakistan. But remember, jokes don’t always have to make fun of someone or something, they can simply be a light-hearted view of the world that makes everyone laugh.
Knock Knock Pakistani Jokes
Knock knock jokes are a favorite among kids around the world, and Pakistani children are no exception! A classic Pakistani knock knock joke goes like this:
Knock, Knock.
Who’s there?
Karachi.
Karachi who?
‘Karachi’ me if I fall!
Isn’t that fun? The joke turns the city name 'Karachi' into a funny phrase that sounds like 'catch me'!
Best Pakistani Jokes in Urdu
Urdu is the national language of Pakistan, and no wonder, some of the best Pakistani jokes are in Urdu! Let’s look at an example:
Aik admi ne jin ko bola:
"Jin Sahib! Mujhe Amir bana do."
Jin bola: "Mujhe kya maloom ke Amir kaise bana jata hai, mujhe to paisa hi nahi hota."
This translates to: A man asked a genie: "Make me a rich man." The genie replied, "I don't know how to make someone rich, I don't even have money myself."
Sindhi Pakistani Jokes
Sindhi is yet another language spoken commonly in the Sindh region of Pakistan, producing a plethora of funny Sindhi jokes. Let’s check out one such joke:
A Sindhi man on his deathbed told his wife, "After I die, sell all my property and put all the money in the grave with me, I want to go to the next world rich." After the funeral, his wife put a box in the grave. A friend asked, "Didn’t he want all his money to go with him?" and she replied, "I put all his money in the bank and gave him the check."
Conclusion
As we come to the end of these rib-tickling Pakistani jokes, it's important to understand that jokes are just one way we humans keep ourselves entertained and connected. They allow us to find laughter in the everyday and bring people together.
Wherever we go around the globe, every place has its own unique humor just like Pakistan. And the beautiful thing is, when we share this humor with others, we also share a part of our culture and story. Because remember, laughter knows no boundaries. So keep laughing, keep sharing, and keep the world connected with a good giggle!
Quick Jump To
Funniest Pakistani Short Jokes
Short pakistani jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pakistani humour may include short drone jokes also.
- What's the difference between a Pakistani middle school and an Al Qaeda training ground? I dunno, I just fly the drone.
- What's the difference between a Pakistani preschool and Isis headquarters? I don't know man I just fly the drones
- What's the difference between a Taliban outpost and a Pakistani Elementary school? I don't know, I just fly the drone.
- What is the difference between a Pakistani School and a ISIS Trainingscamp? I have no idea I'm only flying the drone.
- What's the difference between a Pakistani grade school and an Al-Qaeda training base? How am I supposed to know, I just pilot the drone
- Why does the Pakistani prefer the toilet over making love to his wife ? The hole is tighter, and the smell is better.
- What's the difference between a Taliban outpost and a Pakistani elementary school? I don't know, I just fly the drone.
- What's the difference between a Pakistani Kindergarten and a Taliban Training Ground? Don't ask me, I just fly the drone.
- How do you tell the difference between a Pakistani wedding and an ISIS training camp? I don't know, I just fly the drone
- what's the difference between a Pakistani elementary school in the mountains and an Al-Queda outpost? I dunno man I just fly the drone.
Share These Pakistani Jokes With Friends
Pakistani One Liners
Which pakistani one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pakistani? I can suggest the ones about afghan and .
- What do you call a skinny Pakistani cow? A moo-slim.
- Why do the Pakistanis love lean cows? Because they are moo-slim.
- The Pakistani cricket team walk into a bar... to watch the Indian Premier League
- Why don't they let Pakistanis take corners in soccer? Because they'll set up a shop.
- Why do Pakistanis celebrate July 4th? Because all the drone pilots are on vacation
- Pakistani breakup line Boy to Girl: It's not you, it's my goat !
- What is the favourite meal of pakistani taliban members? Tikka Malala
- What was the name of the pakistani hide and seek champion ? 'amhid'
- What do you call a good looking Pakistani? Asif
- Why do Pakistani's smell so bad? So blind people can hate them as well.
- What do you call a lesbian Pakistani? Minjeeta
- What do you call a gay Pakistani? Ramaman Deep.
- What do you call a Pakistani Elvis impersonator? Amal Shookup.
- What do you call a Pakistani with a sheep and a goat Bisexual
- You know the famous Pakistani comic book guy... Pakistan-Lee?
Indian Pakistani Jokes
Here is a list of funny indian pakistani jokes and even better indian pakistani puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What's the difference between Indians and Pakistanis? When a Pakistani has a red dot on his forehead it means he has about two seconds to live.
- Why do Indians and Pakistanis have crooked noses? All the inbreeding!!
- I'm done making jokes about Pakistani and Indian people they're all the same anyway.
Pakistani Wife Jokes
Here is a list of funny pakistani wife jokes and even better pakistani wife puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What does my wife telling me about her day have in common with a Pakistani elementary school? We're both in for a droning.
Cheerful Pakistani Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!
What funny jokes about pakistani you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make pakistani pranks.
Why did the Pakistani cross the road? Because the American government was subsidizing the construction of mango harvesting and preservation infrastructure in the region on the other side, allowing farmers with the necessary means to develop strong ties to American markets and earn significant profits.
Q: Why aren't Pakistani good at Football?
A: Because every time they get a Corner, they open a shop.
A Pakistani living in England (offensive)
A Pakistani who had recently moved to England had been feeling extremely ill for a week and so decided to visit the doctor. The doctor asked what was wrong with him and the Pakistani complained of a terrible headache and sickness. Upon hearing this the doctor told him to get a bucket at home and fill it with fish, human f**... and milk and leave it out in the sun for a couple of days before putting it next to his bed as he slept at night and taking it everywhere with him. Astounded, the Pakistani left and did what he was told despite being surprised that he should do such a thing.
Three days later the Pakistani returned to the doctor "It's a miracle!" he exclaimed"I got better overnight! How could have it worked?" to which the doctor replied "It was simple, you were homesick."
Why did the Pakistani cook get fired?
He could only cook eggs Sunni side up and, honestly, they tasted like s**...'ite.
An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman... (long joke)
An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a Hawaiian and an Alaskan), an Argentinean, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovak, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, an Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uruguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, an Iranian, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Syrian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, an Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a v**... Islander, a Georgian, a Bahaman, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Canadian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Ghanaian, an Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian, 2 Africans and you...
walk into a fine restaurant.
"I'm sorry," says the maître d', after scrutinizing the group, "but you can't come in here without a Thai."
What's the difference between a Pakistani elementary school and an Al Qaeda training camp?
Don't ask me, I just fly the drone.
So on the morning of 9/11 then Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf rang up Bush
Musharraf - "Mr President, I would like to express my condolences to you. It is a real tragedy. So many people, such great buildings... I would like to assure that we had nothing in connection with that..
Bush - "What buildings? What people?"
Musharraf - "Oh, what time is it in America now?"
Bush - "It's eight in the morning."
Musharraf - "Oops... Will call back in an hour."
Dead Pakistani
The following conversation took place after a recently deceased Pakistani man knocked on the gates of Heaven for about 5 minutes.
St. Peter: What do you want?
Pakistani man: I'm here for Jesus.
St. Peter: Jesus, your taxi's here!!
Home safety
I took my name off the Neighborhood Watch List.
I've got two Pakistani flags raised in my front garden, one at each corner and the black flag of ISIS in the center.
The local police, and multiple intelligence services are watching my house 24/7.
I've never felt safer in my entire Life!
What do you call a Pakistani with poor o**... hygiene?
Plaquistani
What's the difference between a Pakistani mosque and a Afghanistan mosque and an Iraqi mosque?
How should I know, I just fly the drones.
A pakistani cabbie called me a racist
I didn't say a word and left the cab. Because you don't negotiate with terrorists
Islamic Star Trek?
The Iranian Ambassador to the UN had just finished giving a speech, and walked out into the lobby of the convention center where he was introduced to a United States Marine Corps General.
As they talked, the Iranian said, "I have just one question about what I have seen in
America ."
The General said, "Well, is there anything I can do to help?"
The Iranian whispered, "My son watches this show called 'Star Trek' and in it there
is Kirk who is Canadian, Chekhov who is Russian, Scotty who is Scottish, Uhura who is black, and Sulu who is Japanese, but there are NO Muslims. My son is very upset and doesn't understand why there aren't any Iranians, Iraqis, Afghans, Egyptians, Palestinians, Saudis, Syrians, or Pakistanis on 'Star Trek'.
"The General leaned toward the Iranian Ambassador, and whispered in his ear, "That's because it takes place in the future..."
I installed a new home alarm system I've never felt safer
I've disconnected my home alarm system and de-registered from the Neighborhood Watch.
I've got two Pakistani flags raised in the front yard, one at each corner, and the black flag of ISIS in the center.
The local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching the house 24/7. I've never felt safer and I am saving $49.95 a month.
Just saved 50 bucks!
I've disconnected my home alarm system and de-registered from the Neighborhood Watch. I've got two Pakistani flags raised in the front yard, one at each corner, and the black flag of ISIS in the center. The local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching the house 24/7. I've never felt safer and I'm saving $49.95 a month!
I come from a mixed race family...
My father prefers the 100 metres...and my mother is Pakistani.
I was at a Pakistani owned gas station...
There was some sort of problem with my debit card at the pump.
I know this because a message popped up that said "PLEASE SEE KASHIR."
An pakistani in the US fears for his safety
Email note from Abdul in Washington to his friend Ahmed in Pittsburgh:
I was fed up with being burgled every other day in my neighbourhood.
So, I tore out my alarm system & de-registered from our local Neighbourhood Watch.
I've planted a Pakistani flag in each corner of my front garden and a large Black Flag of ISIS in the centre. I grew a beard and only wear turbans in my freetime.
Now, the Washington Police, the FBI, the National Security Agency, Scotland Yard, MI-5, MI-6, the CIA and every other intelligence service in the world are all watching my house 24x7x365.
My children are followed to school every day and my wife when she goes shopping. I'm followed to and from work every day. So no one bothers me at all.
I have never felt safer.
Took down my rebel flag and peeled off my NRA sticker off the front door.
We have disconnected our home alarm system and quit the candy-a**... neighborhood watch. We bought two Pakistani flags on eBay and raised them in the front yard, one at each corner, plus a black flag of ISIS in the center. Now, the local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching the house 24/7. I have never felt safer and we're saving $49.99 a month!
Pakistani math problem.
Ahmed has 3 lunch boxes.
He gives one to Mohammed and another to Hassan. Calculate the radius of the e**....
Why can't Pakistanis play soccer?
Whenever they get a corner they set up a convenience store
Girl, you must be a Pakistani shopping mall
Because a lot of guys think they would be in paradise if they blew up inside you.
What did the clingy drone pilot say to the Pakistani women?
Sorry for blowing your phone up.
There are so many Pakistanis and Nigerians in London these days
The city is starting to feel a lot less Polish
I have a Pakistani girl friend.
Last night she said that she wanted to blow me. Now I wasn't sure if I should lower my pants or call the cops.
Bready dispute
I heard a couple of Pakistani friends of mine arguing for hours about bread rolls.
It was much Urdu about muffins.
69 years ago
both India and Pakistan got independence on this day.
Indians have become heads of Google, Microsoft, Pepsico, Jaguar, Land Rover and
Pakistanis have become heads of Taliban, Al-Qaeda, Jammat U Dawa, Hijbul Mujahideen
Also India entered Mars but Pakistan still trying to enter India.
a pakistani soldier enlists in the army , ( xpost - india )
A Pakistani soldier who just enlisted asked the Commanding Officer for a 3 day pass.The CO says, "Are you crazy? You just joined the Pakistani army, and you already want a 3 day pass? You must do something spectacular for that recognition!" So the soldier comes back a day later in an Indian tank! The CO was so impressed, he asked, "How did you do it?" "Well, I jumped in a tank, and went toward the border with the Indians. I approached the border, and saw an Indian tank. I put my white flag up, the Indian tank put his white flag up. I said to the Indian soldier, 'Do you want to get a 3 day pass?' So we exchanged tanks!"
Pakistan launches a rocket to Moon.
Pakistani News channel reports: "Water and fishes found on Moon."
BBC reports: "Pakistani satellite found in Arab sea."
As the navy seals burst into o**... bin ladens room in his pakistani compound, his last dying words forever wrung in the ears of the seals...
"It was just a prank bro"
Whats the differebce between an Afghani Military Base and a Pakistani Elementary School?
I don't know, I just fly the drone.
What's the difference between a Taliban Outpost and a Pakistani School?
I don't know, why don't you ask the 50 drone pilots on this sub?
What's the difference between a Pakistani hospital and a t**... camp?
We don't fund hospitals in Pakistan
Local Hero saves lady from Dog
A man in USA sees a dog attacking a girl! He kicks the dog, it dies!
Newspapers report: "Local Hero saves lady from Dog"
Man says I'm not American
Report changed: "Foreign Hero Saves girl from Dog"
Man says: Actually I'm Pakistani
Breaking News: "t**... killed Innocent Dog which was playing with a girl"
What's the difference between a Pakistani school and military base?
Don't ask me man, I just fly the drone.
A Pakistani boy took admission in an American school .
A Pakistani boy took admission in an American school .
Teacher : Whats your name ?
Boy : Zain.
Teacher : No, now you are in America, your name is Johnny from today. Boy went home and his mother asked: How was the day Zain?
Boy : I am an American now, so call me Johnny. Mom and Dad both got offended and beat him up. Next day he was back to school all bruised .
Teacher : What happened Johnny ?
Boy: Ma'm, just 6 hours after I became American, I was attacked by two Pakistani terrorists.
What's the difference between an AL Queada base and a Pakistani school?
I don't know man, I just fly the drone.
DISCLAIMER: Not my joke.
The one about the Pakistani Mental Health Hotline
*Hotline*: Pakistani Mental Health Hotline, how can I help you?
*Caller*: My life s**..., I see no way out.
*Hotline*: Do not worry, we are here to help you.
*Caller*: I'm feeling suicidal. What should I do?
*Hotline*: How close are you to India?
*Caller*: Don't know exactly, maybe 400km.
*Hotline*: So can you drive a truck?
A Pakistani boy took...
.... admission in an American school ...
Teacher : Whats your name ?
Boy : Nadir
Teacher : No, now you are in America, your name is Johnny from today.
Boy went home and his mother asked: How was the day Nadir?
Boy : I am an American now, so call me Johnny.
Mom and Dad both got offended and beat him up.
Next day he was back to school all bruised ...
Teacher : What happened Johnny ?
Boy: Ma'm, just 6 hours after I became American, I was attacked by two Pakistani terrorists.
What's the name of the Pakistani man who's seen everything and been everywhere?
Binder Dundat
Why does the current Pakistani Prime Minister hate the Calibri font?
Because it is sans Sharif
Why are Pakistani Wedding Cakes made out of f**...?
To keep the flies off the bride.
A German, Frenchman, and Pakistani walk into a bar
"Jeez, we should lower the bar" the Olympic hurdle committee exclaimed.
What do you call a Pakistani p**... in Los Angeles?
Lahore.
Pakistani Maths Problems are like really really complex
Abdul has 3 lunch boxes.
He gives one to Rafiq and another to Hassan.
Calculate the radius of the e**....
A guy walks through a Pakistani village
He sees a man dusting off a carpet from his shop and asks "What's the matter, it won't start?"
What do you call a Pakistani woman with no legs?
A p**...-no-standy Woman
I lost my job at the laundry mat the other day
Apparently our policy of seperating the w**... from the colors dosent mean telling the african americans and the pakistanis to get out
A Pakistani p**... walks into les barreaux.
All the soûlards shout, "LAHORE".
Im not racist.
Ive r**... black, hispanic, Asian, and Pakistani woman.
A two-seater plane crashed in a cemetery in Lahore
Pakistani police has so far discovered 25 bodies
Pakistani proverb.
Optimistic students take English. Pessimistic students take Chinese. Realists take Kalashnikov assault rifle.
Offensive warning
An English man, a Welsh man and a Pakistani man are waiting at a hospital as their wives had just given birth. A midwife comes in and explains that the name tags have been messed up and they will have to work out which baby belongs to who. The English man, by right, goes first and chooses what is clearly the Pakistani child. When the baby's father points this out to him, he says I know, but there's a Welsh kid in there and I'm not taking any chances
Pakistani Girlfriend
My Pakistani GF wants to blow me tonight....
I'm not sure if I should be excited or scared ...
On a flight from Dubai to NYC, I met a cheerful gentleman from Pakistani. He stressed that Pakistan is now a new country, peaceful & totally against terrorism
To prove his point, he decided not to hijack the plane.
An Afghan, upon landing at Islamabad Airport,
introduced himself to a Pakistan Immigration Officer, as Ex-Minister of Ports & Shipping of Afghanistan.
The surprised Pakistani Officer asked:"But there is no sea in Afghanistan. How can you be the Ex-Minister of Ports & Shipping.?"
The Afghan replied: "Wallah ya Habibi, don't you have a Minister for Law & Justice in Pakistan.?"
Translated Pakistani Joke: A man walks into a store and asks for a live chicken for a party
The store owner gives him a chicken, the man pays, and he leaves.
Sometime later, the man comes back with the chicken, furious.
The shopkeeper asks him, What's wrong with the chicken? Why have you brought it back to me so angry?
The man yells and says that one leg of the chicken is shorter than the other.
The shopkeeper replies, Are you eating the chicken or putting it on the dance floor?
The police arrive to find two Irishmen with a dead Pakistani.
The Police ask, Do you know how this man died?
The Irishmen reply, No we don't know anything about the man!
The police then ask, Do you know what his name was?
The Irishmen reply again, and they say I told you I don't know anything about the man! We just went drinking with him a lot but never knew anything about him. All I know is that he has two arseholes.
The police asked in shock, Are you sure he had two arseholes?
The Irishmen replied, We're absolutely certain. Every time we went to a bar with him, the barman would always say, 'Look! There's the Pakistani with those two arseholes!'
Wow glad you guys liked this one
You've got to be careful while making jokes about Pakistani food on Reddit.
You don't want to end up with bad Korma.
An Afghan escaping from Taliban walks in through the Pakistani border...
He is immediately stopped by Paxtani border patrol agents and asked to identify himself. He stops and says he's the Minister of Ports & Shipping of Afghanistan.
Paxtani border officer: "But there is no sea in Afghanistan. How can you be the Minister of Ports & Shipping?"
Afghan: "Don't you have a Minister for Law & Justice in Pakistan?"
