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Pakistan Jokes

93 pakistan jokes and hilarious pakistan puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about pakistan that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Looking for a good laugh? Check out our collection of Pakistan jokes. From jokes about the Pakistani government to jokes about Pakistani culture, we've got something for everyone.

Funniest Pakistan Short Jokes

Short pakistan jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pakistan humour may include short tourism jokes also.

  1. What do you call a man from Pakistan who's been everywhere and done everything? Bindair Dundat
  2. Trump to bartender: We are going to nuke Pakistan & kill Mia Khalifa Bartender: why mia khalifa?
    Trump to Imaran Khan: see nobody cares about Pakistan!
  3. Pakistan launches a rocket to Moon. Pakistani News channel reports: "Water and fishes found on Moon."
    BBC reports: "Pakistani satellite found in Arab sea."
  4. When it comes to corruption in countries Nigeria takes first place and Pakistan comes in second. I have a feeling that Pakistan bribed Nigeria to take first place…
  5. Why doesn't Pakistan have its national football team? Whenever they get a corner, they will set up a shop.
  6. Why does Pakistan never get a corner during a football match? Every corner they get, they open a shop on it
  7. Did you hear about the refuse collector in Pakistan who died after carrying too much rubbish? He was Bin Laden.
  8. I got punched twice for making a dadjoke. Once in India, another in Pakistan.
    It was Pun Jab.
  9. What healthcare program is offered to the citizens of Pakistan? OsamaCare... It's the bomb.
  10. Did you hear about the bomb blast in Pakistan? Apparently the terrorists were tired of the commute and wanted to work from home for a while

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Pakistan One Liners

Which pakistan one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pakistan? I can suggest the ones about drone and afghan.

  1. What is the national bird of Pakistan? An American drone.
  2. What's Pakistan's tourism tagline? "Have a blast, it might be your last"
  3. Pakistan makes nuclear threat in response to fake news The struggle Israel
  4. India and Pakistan calling each other out Kashmir Outside
  5. When they say a girl is dynamite In Pakistan, they mean it.
  6. Pakistan is such a weird country It's a Muslim country but their capital is Islamabad?
  7. What did the stubborn Hindu in Pakistan say after partition? Na-ama-ste
  8. Pakistan has the most catchy tourism tagline... Come Have a Blast, It may be your last.
  9. Do you know how I got from Iraq to Pakistan? Iran
  10. Politics in Pakistan You don't cast your vote.
    You vote your caste.
  11. What is the most forbidden spice in Pakistan? Haram masala
  12. What do you call a nationalistic middle-eastern? a Pakistan
  13. What's the national martial art of Pakistan? Karachi
  14. What do you call a group of crazy Eminem fans from South Asia? A Pakistans
  15. I have two sweaters. One made in Pakistan, the other in India. They're both Cashmere.

Pakistan Flood Jokes

Here is a list of funny pakistan flood jokes and even better pakistan flood puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A charity single has been released in aid of Pakistan flood relief... Raindrops keep falling on Ahmed.
  • Reports of terrible flooding in Pakistan Authorities fear it was the work of a s**... plumber

Pakistan Army Jokes

Here is a list of funny pakistan army jokes and even better pakistan army puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • India to ship free phones to Pakistan Samsung note 7 to be given free to all t**... and Pakistani army.
    Game over
Pakistan joke, India to ship free phones to Pakistan

Silly Pakistan Jokes for a Good Time with Friends

What funny jokes about pakistan you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean shore jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make pakistan pranks.

A married couple was on holiday in Pakistan they were touring around the marketplace looking at the goods and such, when they passed a small sandal shop.
From the inside they head a Pakistani accent say, "you foreigners come in.
Come in my humble shop." so the married couple walked in.
The Pakistani man said to them, "I have some special sandals I think you'd be interested in.
They make you wild at s**... like a great dessert camel"
Well, the wife was really interested in buying the sandals after what the man had claimed, but her husband felt he really didn't need them, being a s**... hero he as.
The husband, "how could sandals make you into a s**... freak?"
The Pakistani man replied, why don't you see for yourself?"
Well , the husband after much badgering from his wife, finally conceded to try them on.
As soon as he slipped then onto this feet, he got this wild look in his eyes, something his wife hadn't seen in years-- raw s**... power.
In a blink of an eye the husband rushed of too the Pakistani man threw him on the table and started tearing at the guy's pants.
All the time the Pakistani man was screaming, "YOU HAVE THEM ON THE WRONG FEET YOU HAVE THEM ON THE WRONG FEET"

The only reason o**... Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...

Depression

I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I felt like I needed to end it all, so I called the s**... Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.

What do you call a French h**... in Pakistan?

Lahore

Two Muslim beggars

Ahmed and Hamid are both beggars in Great Britain. Ahmed drives a Mercedes, lives in a mortgage-free house and has a lot of money to spend. Hamid only brings in £ 2 or £ 3 a day. Hamid asks Ahmed how he manages to bring home a suitcase full of £10 notes everyday. Ahmed says, Look at your sign.
It says, I have no work, a wife and seven kids to support. Britons who see that do not feel as if they have accomplished anything by giving you money. You will still have no job and a large family. Now look at my sign. So Hamid looks and Ahmed's sign reads: I need only another £10 to move to Pakistan.

A joke from Pakistan: What did the ant whisper into the elephant's ear that made the elephant faint?

"I'm going to be the mother of your children."
I have no idea whether the joke is lost in translation...

I called a s**... prevention line.

It connected me to a call center in Pakistan. I told them I felt suicidal and they asked if I could drive a truck.

Why are you so tan?

because, pak-is-tan

An American mistakes a Hindu from India as a Muslim from Pakistan

Indian guy goes "Excuse me sir, you seem to have mistaken me for a Muslim from Pakistan. I belong to 711 not 911."
I will show myself out.

What Is The National Bird Of Pakistan..

***General Atomics MQ-1 Predator***

Iran to Pakistan

Because I'm Russian

best funny prank pakistan you cannot stop your laughing

nice one

Depression

I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, Social Security, retirement funds, and everything that I called the s**... Lifeline. I was forwarded to a call centre in Pakistan and when I told them I was suicidal, they asked if I could drive a truck...

Did you hear about the problem in Pakistan where smoking a scorpion gets you high?

Well only the men get high, the women get s**...

It's a whole new experience of photobombing...

...when you're in Pakistan

69 years ago

both India and Pakistan got independence on this day.
Indians have become heads of Google, Microsoft, Pepsico, Jaguar, Land Rover and
Pakistanis have become heads of Taliban, Al-Qaeda, Jammat U Dawa, Hijbul Mujahideen
Also India entered Mars but Pakistan still trying to enter India.

What do hippies have in common with women in pakistan?

Face-melting experiences with acid.

My friend from Pakistan said he hates his job and can't take it anymore

"It will get better", I said. "You have your whole life ahead of you. You're only 12 years old."

Why do Pakistan not have an international football team?

Everytime they get a corner they set up a shop.

It's nearly 6 years since US Navy SEALs took out o**... Bin Laden in Pakistan.

Talk Abbottabad place to hide.

What's the difference between a Pakistani hospital and a t**... camp?

We don't fund hospitals in Pakistan

What is the difference between a rebel base and a Pakistan school?

I don't know I'm just a drone pilot

Why did the blasts happen in Pakistan?

Some lazy terrorists just choose to work from home.

What did the Spanish tourist say when he saw a p**... after arriving in Pakistan?

Lahore

Which is world's most phosphorus country?

Pakistan.

In other news, Pakistan's official font has been announced:

Sans Sharif.

If Pakistan is an Islamic country.....

Then why is its capital called Islama**bad**?

There are signs of hope in south Asia.

India and Pakistan have signed a naan-aggression pact.

Today I brought a lama to the capital of Pakistan.

People kept telling me the name of the capital for some weird reason.

You know the famous Pakistani comic book guy...

Pakistan-Lee?

You know why you shouldn't invest in Pakistan?

Because like their people, their economy blows up!

Did you know o**... Bin Laden was found and killed in Pakistan?

Talk Abottabad place to hide!

Two families make a bet on who can be more american

Two families move from Pakistan to America. When they arrive the two fathers make a bet to see, in a years time, which family has become more Americanized.
A Year later they meet again. The first man says,"My son is playing baseball. I had breakfast at McDonalds and im on my way to pick up a case of Bud Light.
How about you?"
The second man replies, "Go back to your sand country, t**..."

Pakistan election is like

There are no good guys.
It's like Games of thrones but in salwar kameez.

Whereabouts is Pakistan?

He's outside playing football with p**... John

They've recently discovered a brand new use for goats in Pakistan...

They're calling it "Wool"

Why aren't people from pakistan not allowed to watch T.V.

Because of telly ban
Joke correction

How come you never see Pakistan in the world cup?

Everytime they get a corner they open up a shop

If you ever feel useless, just remember...

... there is an anti-t**... squad in Pakistan

Pakistan has shot down 2 Indian Jet fighters.

Using sophisticated Sikh - Heating missiles.

A few Indian pilots went to Russia for the training of modern MiG-27 aircraft

Russian instructor:
Press this button to takeoff.
Press this button to turn the plane right.
Press this button to turn the plane left.
Pressing this button to go up.

At the end of the training, Indian pilots stood up and asked.

But how will we bring the plane down?

The instructor took a deep breath and said "Do not worry about it and leave this job to Pakistan"

On a flight from Dubai to NYC, I met a cheerful gentleman from Pakistani. He stressed that Pakistan is now a new country, peaceful & totally against terrorism

To prove his point, he decided not to hijack the plane.

An Afghan, upon landing at Islamabad Airport,


introduced himself to a Pakistan Immigration Officer, as Ex-Minister of Ports & Shipping of Afghanistan.
The surprised Pakistani Officer asked:"But there is no sea in Afghanistan. How can you be the Ex-Minister of Ports & Shipping.?"
The Afghan replied: "Wallah ya Habibi, don't you have a Minister for Law & Justice in Pakistan.?"

What do you call a french p**... in Pakistan?

Lahore

Did you know the 80's pop band "A Flock of Seagulls" is gaining alot of attention in the middle east? They're getting really popular in Pakistan, Afghanistan

And Iran, I ran so far away!

Breaking News: Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan and North Korea to send a joint expeditionary force...

...to Washington D.C. in order to bring peace, democracy and the rule of law to the troubled nation of United States of America.

An Afghan escaping from Taliban walks in through the Pakistani border...

He is immediately stopped by Paxtani border patrol agents and asked to identify himself. He stops and says he's the Minister of Ports & Shipping of Afghanistan.
Paxtani border officer: "But there is no sea in Afghanistan. How can you be the Minister of Ports & Shipping?"
Afghan: "Don't you have a Minister for Law & Justice in Pakistan?"

Pakistan joke, When it comes to corruption in countries Nigeria takes first place and Pakistan comes in second.

jokes about pakistan