Paddy English Paddy Irish Jokes
4 paddy english paddy irish jokes and hilarious paddy english paddy irish puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about paddy english paddy irish that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Amusing Paddy English Paddy Irish Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends
What is a good paddy english paddy irish joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
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3 paddys are out for dinner
English p**... tells his wife "pass the sugar, sugar"
Scottish p**... asks his wife "pass the honey, honey"
Irish p**... says "pass me the milk
Cow."
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A little Irish humor
p**... and m**... were walking along a street in London.
p**... looked in one of the shop windows and saw a sign that caught his eye.
The sign read, "Suits £5.00 each, Shirts £2.00 each, Trousers £2.50 per pair".
p**... said to his pal, "m**... look at the prices! We could buy a whole lot of those and when we get back to Ireland we could make a fortune. Now when we go in you stay quiet, okay? Let me do all da talking 'cause if they hear our accents, they might think we're thicko's from Ireland and try to screw us. I'll put on me best English accent."
"Roight y'are p**..., I'll keep me mouth shut, so I will. You do all da business" said m**....
They go in and p**... said in a posh voice, "Hello my good man. I'll take 50 suits at £5.00 each, 100 shirts at £2.00 each, and 50 pairs of trousers at £2.50 each. I'll back up me truck ready to load 'em on, so I will."
The owner of the shop said quietly, "You're from Ireland, aren't you?"
"Well yes," said a surprised p**.... "What gave it away?"
The owner replied, "This is a dry-cleaners."
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An Englishman & an Irishman
are in the hospital laid side by side in different beds. The Englishman looks over at the Irishman and peels away his oxygen mask from his face.
"I'm English..." Said the Englishman.
The Irishman also takes away his mask and gasps, "Irish..."
The Englishman slowly replies, "My name's David..."
"p**......" Replies the Irishman.
"Cancer..." Says the Englishman pointing to his chest.
The Irishman who slowly turns his head and lifts away his oxygen mask replies,
"Sagittarius..."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
(Irish joke, sorry guys). A teacher is giving an English lesson on the word "Contagious"...
...She asks the class for examples of when they have heard the word being used. One eager child says "Daddy says to cover my mouth when I cough because my cold is contagious".
"Very good!" replied the teacher, "has anybody else got an example?".
"My mummy says my laugh is contagious", said another child.
"Great answer!", said the teacher, "How about you p**...?" (apologies for the token Irish name).
"Well, our neighbour is painting his fence with a toothbrush", said p**..., "Dad says it's going to take the contagious!"
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