Pacific Ocean Jokes
36 pacific ocean jokes and hilarious pacific ocean puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about pacific ocean that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Pacific Ocean Short Jokes
Short pacific ocean jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pacific ocean humour may include short pacific jokes also.
- With all the turmoil in the world, the US benefits from its two greatest allies... The Atlantic and Pacific oceans.
- The Kardashians go for a swim in the pacific ocean The percentage of plastic in the ocean increases by 400%.
- My friend didn't understand my ocean puns I guess I should have been more pacific.
I'll sea myself out. - "What is the largest body of water in the world?" Quiz contestant: "The ocean?" Asker: "I'm sorry, you're going to have to be more Pacific."
- What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Indian Ocean? You need to be more Pacific.
*cymbal clash*
- Q: What do you call 400 lawyers at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean?
A: A great place to start. - -- A tsunami warning has just been issued for the entire coast of California -- In other news:
Your mom recently did a cannon ball into the Pacific Ocean. - (True Story) Just got off a plane through the pacific and realized something... There is no such thing as an emergency water landing. It's called crashing into the ocean.
- The first warm-blooded fish was found in the Pacific Ocean... but we weren't told pacifically where.
- Even though Chuck Norris' lives in Dallas, Texas, his house still has spectacular views of both the Atlantic and Pacific oceans.
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Pacific Ocean One Liners
Which pacific ocean one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pacific ocean? I can suggest the ones about atlantic ocean and ocean.
- What's big and blue and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? The Pacific Ocean.
- What's the biggest thing that separates Jaguars from Leopards? The Pacific Ocean.
- How big is the specific ocean? Sorry, could you be a little more pacific.
- Which ocean? Could you be more Pacific?
- I live near an ocean—not the Atlantic. Can you be more Pacific?
- What did the Pacific ocean say to the Atlantic ocean? Wanna meet up for some Indian?
- Yo mama's so fat... She was baptized in the Pacific Ocean
- What happens when you throw a purple rock into the Pacific Ocean? It goes *splash*
Pacific Ocean Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about pacific ocean you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pacific islander jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make pacific ocean pranks.
Somewhere off Gilligan's Island...
On a Christmas cruise on a luxury ocean liner in the Pacific,
a passenger sees seven straggly people on a small island
jumping up and down and waving their hands and shouting.
"Who are they?" the passenger asks the captain.
"I've no idea. But each year when we pass, they go nuts."
A man and his friend were talking about their New Year's Resolutions.
Friend: I heard you set some really tough resolutions, have you completed them?
Man: Well of course! I've swam across the Pacific Ocean in only speedos.
Friend: Neat.
Man: Scaled Mount Everest n**...!
Friend, a bit skeptical: Really?
Man: Well, there is one I still haven't completed.
Friend: And that is?
Man: Break my habit of lying......
Linkin Park fought among themselves in choosing which ocean to take a cruise on.
The Pacific ocean was favored by Chester. The Atlantic was desired by Mike. The Arctic was appealing to Rob and Brad because it is an ocean they've never been to before. The Antarctic was chosen by Dave and Joe because they've heard tales of great sea creatures to see in that area. With great argument, they decided against them all.
Indian, it didn't even matter.
Chuck Norris injected his blood into a monkey, a fish, and a lizard.
These are now known as King Kong, Jaws, and Godzilla.
What every athlete says after winning: "First of all, I'd like to thank Chuck Norris for not competing."
Chuck can eat Chinese food with one chopstick.
Chuck threw a few rocks into the Pacific Ocean. These are now known as Hawaii.
Chuck can light ants on fire with a magnifying glass..................at night.
When Chuck is in Rome, they do what HE does.
Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one questions why.
The Pope, Billy Graham, and o**... Roberts were in a three-way plane c**... over the Pacific Ocean.
They all died and went to heaven together. "Oh, this is terrible," exclaims St. Peter. "I know you guys think we summoned you here, but this is just one of those coincidences that happen. Since we weren't expecting you, your quarters just aren't ready... We can't take you in and we can't send you back..."Then he got an idea. He picked up the phone, "l**..., this is St. Peter. Hey, I got these three guys up here. They're ours, but we weren't expecting them, and we gotta fix the place up for 'em. I was hoping you could put them up for a while. It'll only be a few of days. What d'ya say?" Reluctantly, the Devil agreed. However, two days later... St. Peter got a call. "Pete, this is l**.... Hey, you gotta come get these guys. This Pope fellow is forgiving everybody, the Graham guy is saving everybody, and that Roberts has raised enough money to buy air conditioning.
BREAKING NEWS!
Two tanker ships collided and sank in the southern Pacific Ocean yesterday. One was filled with red paint and the other, smaller tanker, was filled with blue paint. All crew members survived but now are marooned on an uninhabited island.
A man finds an old bottle. He starts rubbing off the dust...
... when a genie appears.
"You have one wish," says the genie.
"One wish? I thought it was three wishes," said the man.
"That's only in stories," replied the genie. "One wish is all you get."
"Well...", started the man, who was an American, "I've always wanted to go to Australia but I'm scared of flying. I wish for a bridge across the Pacific Ocean so I can drive there."
"I said wishes not miracles," replied the genie. "Do you have any idea how impossible that is? That would require the most complicated engineering design ever attempted. It would take all the world's resources for 100 years to build. Wish for something realistic."
"Ok," said the man, "I've never been able to understand women. I wish I could understand women."
"How many lanes would you like on your bridge?" said the genie.
THE NEW RECRUIT
A man joins the navy and is shipped out immediately to an aircraft carrier in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. The captain is showing the new recruit around the ship, when the recruit asks the captain what the sailors do to satisfy their urges when they're at sea for so long.
"Let me show you," says the captain.
He takes the recruit down to the rear of the ship where there's a solitary barrel with a hole in it.
"This'll be the best s**... you'll ever have. Go ahead and try it, and I'll give you some privacy."
The recruit doesn't quite believe it, but he decides to try it anyway. After he finishes up, the captain returns.
"Wow! That was the best s**... I've ever had! I want to do it every day!"
"Fine. You can do it every day except for Thursday."
"Why not Thursday?"
"That's your day in the barrel."
A man is walking on a beach...
And he trips over something. He looks down, and it is an old bottle. He picks it up, and out pops a genie. "I will give you one wish, and only one. What will it be?"
The man thinks, and thinks. He lives in California, but really loves to visit Hawaii, but he despises flying. So he asks the genie, "I want a bridge from California to Hawaii, over the Pacific ocean."
The genie looks at him for a bit. He says "No, no, no. Sorry, but a bridge over the Pacific? That is too much! Please think of something else". The man is pretty angry. He really wanted that bridge, and that was really the only thing on his mind. So he thinks, and thinks, and thinks for days. He had to get the right thing. He sleeps on it, and the next day comes returns to the beach.
The genie is still there, so the man asks him, "I want to understand women."
The genie's eyes widen, and he asks him "How many lanes do you want on that bridge?"
A man joins the navy and is shipped out immediately to an aircraft carrier in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.
The captain is showing the new recruit around the ship, when the recruit asks the captain what the sailors do to satisfy their urges when they're at sea for so long.
"Let me show you," says the captain.
He takes the recruit down to the rear of the ship where there's a solitary barrel with a hole in it.
"This'll be the best s**... you'll ever have. Go ahead and try it, and I'll give you some privacy."
The recruit doesn't quite believe it, but he decides to try it anyway. After he finishes up, the captain returns.
"Wow! That was the best s**... I've ever had! I want to do it every day!"
"Fine. You can do it every day except for Thursday."
"Why not Thursday?"
"That's your day in the barrel."