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Owning Jokes

39 owning jokes and hilarious owning puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about owning that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Learn about the multi-faceted nature of jokes and why owning them can be a great way to subvert traditional gender norms. We'll explore how a joke can be an aphrodisiac and a way to trade power.

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Popular Owning Short Jokes

Short owning jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The owning humour may include short owns jokes also.

  1. Disney now owns Star Wars, Marvel, Indiana Jones, Disney world and the Simpsons. If they acquire my parent's divorce they will own my entire childhood.
  2. A guy walks into a bar owned by Eminem He tells the bartender,"Give me 2 shots of..."
    The bartender cuts him off saying,"You only get 1 shot."
  3. Studies show that atheists are more likely to own cats than Christians. Because owning Christians isn't legal, obviously.
  4. As a person who has owned over 50 dogs in their life there are 2 thing I've learnt... 1.) Your time with them Is brief so treasure it.
    2.) They LOVE chocolate.
  5. My dad has a pencil that was once owned by Shakespeare. It's so chewed up that we can't tell if it's 2b or not 2b.
  6. If I owned a race horse, I would name it My Face Just to hear the crowed chant "COME ON! COME ON MY FACE!"
    "...and here comes My Face coming up from the rear!"
    -Credit goes to my mother
    -
  7. When I was young, I thought rich people owned Bose music systems and the rest of us had Sony products. Turns out those were just stereotypes.
  8. Do you know the oldest computer was owned by Adam and Eve? It was an apple, with very limited memory, one byte and everything crashed!
  9. My wife and I were discussing people owning weird animals... and she said, "I've always wanted to get a manatee." I said, "That's very kind of you. I will take it with two sugars."
  10. I like to tell girls I have my own private jet But I always forget to mention that my mom owns the rest of the jacuzzi

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Owning One Liners

Which owning one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with owning? I can suggest the ones about possession and buying.

  1. How can you tell who owns bitcoin at a party? Don't worry, they'll tell you.
  2. How do Millennials fireproof their homes? By never owning one.
  3. I'm thinking of opening a pre-owned clock store... I'm gonna call it 'Second Hand'.
  4. What does a Jamacian call everything he owns? Meetings.
  5. What's more American than owning your own home? Not owning your own home.
  6. I've never owned a telescope... But it's something I'm thinking of looking into
  7. Why shouldn't you invest in muslim-owned businesses? They never show a prophet.
  8. How do you know if someone owns an Apple Watch? Don't worry, they will tell you.
  9. I have my own private jet But my mum owns the rest of the jacuzzi.
  10. What do you call an Arab who owns 5,000 cows A Milk Sheikh.
  11. How do you know if someone owns a Tesla? Don't worry, they'll tell you
  12. What do you call a bakery owned by a redhead? A Ginger Bread-House
  13. If I owned a DeLorean... ...I'd probably only drive it from time to time.
  14. Which nobleman owns a lot of empty property? Baron Wasteland.
  15. What do you call a triangle that got OWNED? A rectangle.

Owning joke, What do you call a triangle that got OWNED?

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about owning can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of owning puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Gather Around for Fun Owning Jokes and Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about owning you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean owned jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make owning prank.

Not vaccinating your child is like owning a PT Cruiser

You're spending thousands a year on something that'll probably be dead in less than five.

The Jetsons gave me unrealistic expectations for the future as a child

Like having a wife who loves me and owning a dog

A guy finally buys his dream car

... And on his first day of owning it, he gets caught speeding down the highway.
Pulling over, the officer walks up to the window and says "Son, I've been a cop for over 30 years, I've heard every excuse there is. If you come up with a new one I'll let you off with a warning."
The driver says "Well, to be honest sir, my wife recently left me for a state trooper, and when I saw your car, I was scared you were bringing her back."

What's the best thing about owning a car in Liverpool?

You'll eventually end up with enough bricks to build a free garage.

three men were sitting in a prison in moscow

they discuss why they were arrested
the first one says I showed up ten minutes late to work and was arrested for sabotage
the second one says I showed up five minutes early to work and was arrested for espionage
the third one says I showed up to work on time and was arrested for owning a western watch

Spongebob was the most unrealistic kid's show

A teenager in a minimum wage job owning a house and car. Pfft

What's common between owning a cat and voting?

Checking a box for a p**....

The best part about owning a pet.

You can blame your dog for f**...,
you can blame your cat for things falling over at night, and you can blame your goldfish for the screaming in the basement.

My liberal friend asked me why we think owning gun is a God given right when noone in Bible had one.

I corrected him that Paul had epistle...

Studies show that owning a ladder is 10 times more dangerous than owning a gun.

That's why I own 10 guns. In case some maniac trys to come at me with a ladder.

What's the difference between writing your will and owning an ant farm?

One's a legacy, the other a sea of legs.

I've never been really good at owning up to my actions and responsibilities

Can't believe my parents raised me this way.

The best part about owning a cat...

One of the best things about having a cat is that when you hear noises at night you can just think, "Oh, must be the cat," and go back to sleep. Why, just last night my cat dragged what must have been a large chain around the house moaning, "All who have desecrated this land must die." ...so cute.

Millenials dream about owning a house

Too bad it's surreal estate

I asked my Native American wife if she'd be interested in owning some land.

She told me she had reservations.

Why is owning a Prius difficult?

It's hard to drive when you're patting yourself on the back all the time.

The medical term for owning too many dogs....

Rover Dose.

I'm so tired of double standards.

When women have s**... with a bunch of guys they're "empowering themselves" or "owning their sexuality".
Meanwhile, if I do the same thing I'm "just some gay guy".

I don't mind owning a .4mm pen.

I think it's fine.

What do you call a TV reality show where a 50 year old white man is trying to get laid?

To catch a predator.
---
Why do white girls walk around in groups of 3 and 5?
Because they can't even!
---
Why do white people have so many pets?
Because owning people is not legal anymore

Owning joke, What do you call a TV reality show where a 50 year old white man is trying to get laid?

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these owning jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.