Owes Jokes
31 owes jokes and hilarious owes puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about owes that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Owes Short Jokes
Short owes jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The owes humour may include short awes jokes also.
- Congratulations to me! I just made my last mortgage payment! I still owe like $262,000, but I'm just not going pay them any more.
- I asked my girlfriend to 68 today She said What's that?
I said That's when you blow me and I owe you one. - Walter White decided to buy a pizza for his son Walter: Hey son I bought you a pizza so you can share it with your friends.
Flynn: Thanks dad, how much do I owe you?
Walter: It's on the house. - British teenager Emma Raducanu has just won $2.5m by winning the US open final Sadly she needed 2 band-aids and a bandage for a cut on her leg in the last game, so she still owes about $25k
- After years of poor yields, Old mcdonald will have to sell his farm... ... to cover what he e-i-e-i owes.
- A guy died and his three friends all owed him $100 each 1st and 2nd friends both put $100 on his coffin and declared repayment even in death. 3rd guy wrote a check for $300 and took the $200 change.
- Albert Einstein owed the inspiration for one of his best ideas to his cousin who had Down Syndrome... he had a special relative, you see?
- Last night I asked my wife for a 68 ... She said: What that ?
I said: You go down on me and I owe you one. - I owe my success as a fruit farmer to my dear dad. Whenever I felt scared as a kid, he always told me to grow a pear
- Owain Hughes joke Gavin and Stacey Gavin moves to Wales and meets a coworker named Owain Hughes.
Gavin: Before you ask, no I don't Owe Wayne Hughes.
Share These Owes Jokes With Friends
Owes One Liners
Which owes one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with owes? I can suggest the ones about owed and obliges.
- Due to rising costs, Old McDonald had to sell his farm. E-I-E-I-Owes a lot of money.
- If the moon landing was indeed fake NASA would owe us a huge Apollo-gy.
- Temel owes a lot of money to the local shops
- Sorry to hear about your dementia... But do you have that 10 grand you owe me?
- Ever heard of the 68 position? You go down on me now and I'll owe you one.
- My favorite position is the 68. You go down on me and I'll owe you one!
- Why did the chiropractor go bankrupt? He owed too much in back taxes.
- Why was the IRS after the chiropractor He owed back taxes.
- 68? I asked my wife if she wanted to 68. That's when she blows me and i owe her one.
- What's the definition of a 68? That's when you blow me and I owe you 1.
- What did one indebted sheep say to the other? I owe ewe
- What's a 68 to a blonde? She goes down on you and you owe her one
- How can i convince my Buddhist friend that he owes me money from 3 lifetimes ago?
- Do you want to 68? You go down on me and I'll owe you one.
- Why don't we do a 68 That's when you "do" me and I'll owe you 1
Howlingly Hilarious Owes Jokes for All Ages to Enjoy
What funny jokes about owes you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean owns jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make owes pranks.
My neighbour owes me £500 and he won't pay up...
A man went to his lawyer and told him, 'My neighbour owes me £500 and he won't pay up. What should I do?' 'Do you have any proof he owes you the money?' asked the lawyer. 'Nope,' replied the man. 'OK, then write him a letter asking him for the £1,000 he owed you,' said the lawyer. 'But it's only £500,' replied the man. 'Precisely. That's what he will reply and then you'll have your proof!'
All the proof you need.
A man went to his lawyer and told him, "My neighbor owes me $500 and he won't pay up. What should I do?"
"Do you have any proof he owes you the money?" asked the lawyer.
"Nope," replied the man.
"OK, then write him a letter asking him for the $5,000 he owed you," said the lawyer.
"But it's only $500," replied the man.
"Precisely. That's what he will reply and then you'll have your proof!"
A professor makes a bet with a student
A professor makes a bet with a student. Every question the professor asks that the student can't answer the student will owe him $1, every question the student asks that the professor can't answer he owes the student $100.
Professor: What element has the atomic number 45?
The student having no idea hands the professor $1.
Student: What animal walks on 2 legs, sleeps on 4 legs, and runs on 3 legs?
The professor is stumped, so he gives the student $100.
Professor: Ok you win, but on earth was the answer to your question?
The student gives the professor $1 and goes home.
A lawyer is about to go home for the night...
...when a client shows up, asking for his council. The lawyer decides to stay late and work with the client. Afterwards, the client asks how much he owes for the lawyer's time.
"One hundred dollars," the lawyer responds.
The client pays him and walks out, at which point the lawyer realizes it's two hundred dollar bills stuck together. This leaves the lawyer with a moral dilemma...
Does he tell his partner?
A man went to his lawyer and told him, 'My neighbour owes me ₹ 50000 and he won't pay up.
'What should I do?'
'Do you have any proof he owes you the money?' asked the lawyer.
'Nope,' replied the man.
'OK, then write him a letter asking him for the ₹1,00000 he owed you,' said the lawyer.
'But it's only ₹50000,' replied the man.
'Precisely. That's what he will reply and then you'll have your proof!'
I'm not the kinda guy that takes out a girl and spend $300 and think that she owes me s**....
That's cause I don't think s**... is worth $300.
If I take out a girl and spend $300 on a date then she owes me money.
A comedian is called to the IRS...
...they tell him he owes more taxes. He says, "Why?" They say, "Because we appreciated your humor."
A Soldier I was renting a house to did a runner
And owes me 6 months rent. He said he was a General but I've since discovered he is a Left Tenant.
A blind man owes money from his friend
A blind man owes money to his friend and said to him, when I see you next time I will pay my debt back to you.
Do you know the real reason Bigfoot is so good at hiding?
...he owes Chuck Norris money
Why did Old McDonald sell his farm?
To cover what he e-i-e-i owes.
The Mob
Hey, guess who has both thumbs and owes money to mafia.
*Gestures towards self with thumbs*
*Puts on a serious face* No one has both thumbs and owes money to the mafia.
