Over 80s Jokes
97 over 80s jokes and hilarious over 80s puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about over 80s that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Over 80s Short Jokes
Short over 80s jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The over 80s humour may include short over 60s jokes also.
- People think that just because I grew up in the ghetto back in the 80s, i should walk around carrying a big ol' boom box on my shoulder. But I refuse to go with that stereotype.
- I like Florida. Everything is in the 80s: The people, the temperature, and the average IQ.
- What do Abraham Lincoln and an '80s sitcom have in common? Both were shot before a live audience.
- I've been diagnosed with a type of amnesia where I deny the existence of certain 80s bands. There is no cure.
- Mommy mommy why do I keep running around in circles? "Shut up kid or I'll nail your other foot to the floor."
In the 80s, my mother thought this was hilarious. - Back in the 80s I asked my friend from soviet Russia how he felt living there. He said he couldn't complain.
- Everything in Florida is in the 80s The Temperature, the Humidity, the Average Age, and the IQ.
- Doctor: "Sir, the results are in. I'm afraid you have a serious case of 80s Rock Bands Alzheimer's" Patient: "Oh my god. What is the cure??!"
- My girlfriend asked if I remembered to get tickets for the 80s dance party she was really looking forward to. I had to tell her... Domo arigato, totally forgoto
- Do you know how much pressure did the Cartel put on the Columbian goverment in the 80s? 1 escobar
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Over 80s One Liners
Which over 80s one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with over 80s? I can suggest the ones about turning 80 and eighty.
- I'm no expert on covid-19 but I do know the cure They are an amazing band from the 80s.
- Trampolines use to be called jumpolines Until your mom used one back in the 80s
- I like my women like I like my golf game, mid-80s with a slight handicap.
- An 80s singer caught himself on fire, what does he do? Stop, Drop, and Rick-Roll
- In the 80s, Britain only had three channels BBC 1, BBC 2, and The English Channel
- I asked my Apple Watch "what's the time?" It said "an 80s funk band."
- Stumbled into a 80s gay bar I was stuck between a rock hard place and a hard rock phase
- Whats another term for a warm 80s drink? Mr. Tea
- Why were some people living in the 80s so healthy? Because they had good high jeans
- The band was playing cheesy 80s music So I ran, I ran so far away.
- What do you call a spider that likes 80s music? A Durantula.
- '80s music always frightened me. I was scared the rhythm really was gonna get me.
- What do you call an 80s band comrpising of only fruit? Durian durian!
im sorry - What do you call an 80s pop star who castrates any man she meets? Cyndi Lopper.
- How does everyone know about the 80s? When they are still 60 years away
Over 80s Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about over 80s you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean 80s music jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make over 80s pranks.
The 80s were great because I didn't have to look at your selfies.
A news station was interviewing an 80-year old woman who had just gotten married for the 4th time in her life.
The interviewer was asking her questions about her life, about how it felt to be marrying again at 80, and about her spouse.
The lady mentions hat her new husband is a f**... director.
Then the reporter asks her if she wouldn't mind telling him a little bit about her first three husbands.
She pauses for a few moments, needing some time to reflect on all of those years. After a short time, she shares some details about her first husbands.
The first, she says, was a banker, whom she married in her 20s. In her 40s, she married a circus ringmaster. In her 60s, she married a preacher, and now, in her 80s, she's marrying a f**... director.
The reporter asks her why, if there was any reason, did she choose to marry those specific people.
She responds, "Well, I married one for the money, two for the show. Three to get ready, and four to go!"
The hair styles in the 80s were just a marketing ploy to sell more hair styling products.
Thanks Big Hair.
Google in the 80s
"I'm sorry, did you mean to search for *Deaf Leopard*?"
I was born in the 80s, but circumcised in the 90s..
I got the Rachel cut.
80s rock fan and popular assassination target Kim Jong Un recently stipulated the soundtrack for his f**......
... Journey - Don't Stop Bereaving.
Did you hear the one about the snake with the wriggly hips?
Look, I'm sorry if I'm breaking a rule, but this has been bothering me for decades. From the comments in this sub, most of you have apparently heard every joke a million times before... ;) I thought maybe somebody's heard the punch line for this one...
In the late 80s, we had a CB in our station wagon. My mom was driving me to middle school one morning, and I did a radio check and found a trucker to talk to.
I told him a few tame kiddie jokes, he laughed, and then he said, "Have you heard the one about the snake with the wriggly hips?"
My mom took the speaker away from me and said, "Before you tell that joke, you should know that you're speaking to a ten-year-old girl."
The trucker said, "Oh..." and then went on to tell a different joke.
I have NEVER heard this joke since, or been able to find it online. It's come back to haunt me at random times, like today, so I thought I'd take a shot here. Anybody know this joke?
I love 80s Rock
It always makes me Bon Jovial
Why does the Brotherhood of Steel from Fallout hate '80s music?
Because of the synths.
Old one I've never seen on here
This joke was in a book I had as a young child, probably from the 70s or 80s. It's so ridiculous, I remember it to this day.
Q: How do you kill a blue elephant?
A: Shoot it with a blue elephant gun.
Q: How do you kill a white elephant?
A: Hold its nose until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.
Guys one of the Greek Gods is trying to destroy 80s music!
H80s
Liz Hackett On What The '80s Taught Herhub
If growing up in the '80s taught me one thing, it's that my friends and I should have found a treasure map by now.
We've got an aviary at home...
We've got an aviary at home, but one of our birds of prey will only exercise at night to the sounds of '80s synth pop.
Our kestrel manoeuvres in the dark.
I have a particular disease for which I deny the existence of some 80s bands
There is no cure
Can of sardines in Soviet Union
A man in the 80s in Soviet Union buys a can of sardines. He opens it and it's empty, but there is a little note in it:
"Not a winner"
I was listening to 80s music today. You just can't beat Tina Turner.
Unless you're i**... Turner.
What was everyone's favorite vegetable in the 80s?
Christopher Reeve
My girlfriend and I went to an 80s themed party. She didn't want me to go as a pop star but I wasn't having it...
I was adamant
Why do 80s music fans get their porridge from the Netherlands?
Because it's made with Holland oats.
Rumor has it Tom Hanks just signed a deal to star in a sequel to one of his greatest 80s blockbusters.
Big, if true.
Heard this on the 80s movie "Night Patrol" : What do you call two cows m**...?
Beef Strokinoff.
How many Metalhaeds does it take to screw in a light bulb?
100.
1 to screw it in, and 99 to tell you that light bulbs were better in the 80s.
Seems like authorities are reporting a plane has exploded carrying vintage 80s Japanese cars ...
It's raining Datsun cogs
There is a Malaysian '80s cover band called "The Union."
What were they thinking, not going with "Durian Durian"?
I went to this gay 80s club last night
I'm pretty sure they were looping the song, Beat It.
I don't normally like to beat around the bush...
But man do I miss s**... in the 80s
If Bag Raiders were a Russian band debuting in the 80s, their hit song will be called...
Shooting Tsars
How does a 80s hip-hop fan play their music?
They Run-VLC.
How did upcoming male actors thank gay Broadway promoters in the 80s?
"Thanks for the exposure!"
It's amazing how much has changed since the 80s
Back then we had a celebrity president with ultraconservative views and a cult following who was obsessed with a wall in the White House, a female Prime Minister with a complicated relationship with the EU and a total disregard for the poor of the country in Number Ten, the Russians were under a regime that made idols of their leaders, took part in mass espionage schemes and got involved in wars in Muslim Countries and we all lived in fear of Nuclear War.
The Scranton, Pennsylvania auto show is this week
They have some good deals on 70s and 80s cars if you are able to pull them out of the front lawns of the sellers.
What was the equivalent of words like lit in the 80s and 90s ...
I lowkey can't stand them
A teacher was going over the history syllabus.
The teacher says to the class "We will be learning about history for the next 6 months. Each month I will teach a different decade. We will cover the 1940s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s and 2000-2010".
A student puts her hand up and asks "what about the '90s?". The teacher replies saying "only 90s kids remember the 90s".
A bunch of 80s action stars dressed up as Skid Row for Halloween but they couldn't figure out who would be the lead singer.
But Arnold Schwarzenegger said "I'll be Bach"
Why do we have so many 80s kids in 2018?
Cause they couldn't outrun time.
Starting a sugar daddy dating site for people into 80s music.
I'm calling it Girls Just Wanna Have Funds.
I did a few fashion shoots with Marillion in the '80s.
It was very easy work... like shooting Fish in apparel.
An elderly gentleman walks into an upscale cocktail lounge. He is in his mid-80s, well-dressed, hair well-groomed, great looking suit, flower in his lapel and smelling slightly of an expensive after shave. He presents a very nice image.
Seated at the bar is a classy looking lady in her mid-70s.
The sharp old gentleman walks over and sits alongside her. He orders a drink and takes a sip.
He slowly turns to the lady and says: "So, tell me; do I come here often?"
This man goes to the doctor and the doctor said;
You seem to have forgotten everything you know about 80s music
The man in a state of panic asks; oh no, what is the cure
The doctor said; oh my god it's worse than I thought
My father always said laughter Was the best medicine, Which is why i was so confused
when I finally tried c**... in the '80s
What do you call a lazy 80s band?
Dulounged Dulounged.
Why were the bloods the strongest gang in the 80s?
Their toughest competition were crips
As racism diminished from the 60s into the 80s, there were still plenty of what you might call "classically trained" cops
^(am black)
What age people will stop believing in God?
around 80s
10s to 20s is underage, 30s and 40s is m**..., 50s and 60s is cougars, 70s and 80s is grannies...
90s and above is necrophilia.
There are two types of accident on the road.
Over 80s doing under 20, and under 20s doing over 80.
For the first time ever I understood what all the fuss was about 80s music
It was an Aha moment
I was walking down Fifth Avenue today and I found a wallet
I was gonna keep it rather than return it.
But I thought: "Well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel?"
And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson.
PS:- This was a joke cracked by Emo Philips way back in the 80s - I really loved it and wanted to share it here
You know that thing in your back yard the kids like to jump on?
Yeah that was called a jumpoline until back in the '80s when your mom jumped on one.
Here's a joke from the 80s
Ronald Reagan and Nancy Reagan are out to dinner. The waiter asks what the First Lady will have. She says, "I'd like the filet mignon, and a baked potato."
The waiter asks, "and the vegetable?"
Mrs. Reagan answers, "Oh, he'll have the same."
Disney is attempting to take over and brainwash our country by bringing back '80s Mickey Mouse merchandise
NOT ON MY WATCH!!
In the late '80s, NBC's most popular sitcom was the Cosby Show, with ALF not far behind. Knowing what we know now, I guess you could call their weekly ratings battle
Alien vs. Predator.
Al Gore is in the wrong line of work
Some people's names match their careers surprisingly well. Imagine a psychic named Krystal Ball or a stylist named Barbera Cutter.
But Al Gore is a failure in this regard. He had the perfect opportunity to start a math rock band in the 80s or 90s and just chose to not. It should have been fate.
I personally will never let it go that I'll never hear an album from the math rock legends the Al Gore Rhythms.
What do Michael Jackson and the Berlin Wall have in common?
They were both really big in the 80s, and then bits started falling off of them.
I finally convinced my h**... friend to get a Covid vaccination, but he doesn't want Moderna.
He says, just because she sang some good pop songs back in the 80s don't mean she knows how to make a vaccine! .
Why wife keeps telling me to stop singing "stand and deliver" every day because it's too dated and 80s.
I refused. I was Adam ant.
Richard Marx was a famous singer in the 80s
But did you know his sister, Onya, invented the starter p**...?