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Over 60s Jokes

37 over 60s jokes and hilarious over 60s puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about over 60s that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Over 60s Short Jokes

Short over 60s jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The over 60s humour may include short over sixties jokes also.

  1. I wanted to invest in Lumber Liquidators... But wood stock hasn't been viable sincs the 60s.
  2. An Uber driver I called an Uber, a luxury minivan came.
    The driver asked: are you ok with songs from the 60s?
    Thought for 3 second, I said: Why not
    Then he started to sing...
  3. "Honey, wouldn't you like to go back to the 60s?" "Of course not! I like today's technology too much."
    "But honey I'm talking about kilos you fat cow"
  4. It's strange that Bill Cosby wasnt given a honorary doctorate untill 1976. Because apparently he's been administering drugs since the 60s
  5. What do you call it when a late 60s rock band uses japanese cooking techniques to prepare food on a griddle? Steppenyaki
  6. Imagine if, in some fit of drug-induced rage back in the 60s, Keith Richards had killed David Crosby & Gram Parsons? Talk about killing two byrds with one stone.
  7. As racism diminished from the 60s into the 80s, there were still plenty of what you might call "classically trained" cops ^(am black)
  8. Modern day American gangs try and make out how mad and dangerous they are. But don't forget, those British twin gangsters from the 60s were Kray-Kray.
  9. Contrary to popular belief there was more s**... on the TV in the 50s and 60s than there is now. Modern TVs can't support the weight.
  10. My grandpa has been condescending Dave and Ray Davies since the 60s... I guess he's really into k**... shaming.

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Over 60s One Liners

Which over 60s one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with over 60s? I can suggest the ones about over sixty and sixty year old.

  1. What do Tv and American schools have in common? there weren't any colours until the 60s
  2. I found a vintage Altoids box from the 60s in my attic, it was in mint condition
  3. make love, not war 1) In the 60s, they made love, not war. I'm married. I make both.
  4. When was the Stone Age? In the U.S. and Mexico, it was the 60s - 70s
  5. I've been working on a film about m**... in the 60s. It's a period piece.
  6. What black thing did six men constantly enter in the late 60s? m**... Jagger's Door

Over 60s Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about over 60s you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean sixty years old jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make over 60s pranks.

A solar panel, a wind turbine and a hydro dam are all getting to know each other.

'What kind of music are you into?' asks the dam.
'I'm into trance', replies the solar panel.
'Ooh, too intense for me', dam says, 'I much prefer classical melodies, maybe a little 60s soul at the weekends.'
'What about you Mr Turbine? What are you into?'
'Me?' He replies, 'I'm a huge metal fan.'

Toilet brush

Whilst this is a joke, my nan actually told me this yesterday and insists it's a true story from the 60s when she lived in Cornwall...
So, my grandma was was walking down the street and her neighbour, let's call her Beverley, was heading towards her carrying her shopping but was walking kind of funny.
Naturally my Nan asked if everything was okay and if she's alright, had she hurt herself? No she said, I'm okay, I've just bought one of those new toilet brushes, but I think I'm going to switch back to paper

A 90 year old man goes to the doctor.

Full disclosure, I got this joke from Tom Jones on Marc Maron's w**... podcast today. Tom's 80, mentally spry like he's 30, and he swears like a sailor.
----
90 year old man goes to the doctor.
Says Doctor, it used to be that I'd get these erections so hard that I couldn't even bend them with two hands! 16, 17, 18 years old, all through my twenties... 30, I could bend a little bit, 40s a little bit more. 50s and 60s I'm getting it to about a 90 degree angle, and now I'm 90 I can bend it in half!
I'm getting stronger, right?"

A teacher was going over the history syllabus.

The teacher says to the class "We will be learning about history for the next 6 months. Each month I will teach a different decade. We will cover the 1940s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s and 2000-2010".
A student puts her hand up and asks "what about the '90s?". The teacher replies saying "only 90s kids remember the 90s".

A man in his 60s h**... to a brothel

... constantly shaking from his Parkinson's.
He tells the madam I want 5 girls.
The madam says are you sure? 5 girls might kill you. But the man is adamant and soon enough he's in a room with 5 girls.
Shaking from every joint as he lays on the bed, he tells 2 girls: you two, hold down my arms.
Then he tells 2 more girls: you two, hold down my legs.
Finally, the last one, you get on top.
Now, you 4, let go!

TIL about Mexican drug birds.

During the early 60s drug cartels would use South-American mallard flocks to smuggle drugs over the border.
The birds' predictable migration patterns and considerable size made them perfect for the job, until a few years later.
That's when the ducks got wise and just started smoking all the quack.

50th Anniversary Tour

This year, 60s rock group The Byrds will be embarking on a tour of the United States for the 50th anniversary of their formation. The band announced that former President George Bush will be joining them on stage for several of their songs, however, Bush will be playing both guitar and keyboards in order to cut costs. This just goes to show that a Bush in the band is worth two of the Byrds.

A good-looking woman

A good-looking woman, maybe in her 60s, waked into a bar and sat at the counter next to a dapper gentleman, also in his 60s.
"You remind me of my third husband," she softly remarked.
Startled, he asked, "How many husbands have you had?"
"Two," she said, as a smile crossed her face.

Dad joke

I work with this guy in his 60s and every time he comes in late he always says "Well I came in late so I have to leave early to make up for the time." and he loves it no matter how many times he says it.

I've heard for many years that the feminists of the 60s and 70s would commonly burn their bras in protest, however, today I discovered that this actually never happened and they ended up just throwing their bras away instead.

They couldn't get a fire started.

10s to 20s is underage, 30s and 40s is m**..., 50s and 60s is cougars, 70s and 80s is grannies...

90s and above is necrophilia.

I read recently that the New York mob helped fund and protect the underground gay clubs in the 60s.

Guess you could call them the Free d**... Mafia

I was pleasantly surprised that my GF's mom had passed away

all of her fake jewellery, vintage 60s style clothing, cheap make up and cosmetic products, wigs, fake eyelashes and tonnes of other unwanted stuff to a charity

60S REBEL b**...... FIGHT

You may be a square, baby, but you're round in all the right places

4 friends in their 20s....

Four friends in their 20s go to a new restaurant, Sands, because they've never been there before.
10 years later, they reunite and go back because the waitresses were so pretty.
In their 40s, they decide to go again because of the amazing wine selection.
Another 10 years pass and they once again go because of the delicious food.
In their 60s, they go again because the quiet atmosphere is perfect for a low conversation.
You guessed it, in their 70s they go again, this time for the amazing sunset over the late.
Ten years later, they decide to go to Sands, because they've never been there before.