oven Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious oven puns

Just burned 2,000 calories.

That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.

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Every cook has a secret

The Admiral was visiting one of his ships. When having tea he noticed that every biscuit has the ship's insignia embossed on it.

He is impressed and calls the cook to ask him how he does this.

Cook: When rolling the biscuits I slap each one onto my belt buckle before putting them in the oven.

Admiral: That's pretty unhygienic.

Cook: In that case sir, I'd suggest you skip the doughnuts.

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Bill Withers Duck joke

How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?

Leave it in the oven till it's Bill Withers.

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The Admiral was visiting one of his ships.

When having tea he noticed that every biscuit has the ships insignia embossed on it.
He is impressed and calls the cook to ask him how he does this.

Cook: When rolling the biscuits I slap each one onto my belt buckle before putting them in the oven.

Admiral: That's pretty unhygienic

Cook: In that case Sir, I'd suggest you skip the doughnuts.

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I burned my Hawaiian pizza today...

I guess i should have put the oven on aloha setting

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My girlfriend burned our Hawaiian pizza today...

I should have told her to put the oven on aloha setting.

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I burnt 1200 calories yesterday!

Forgot to take the pizza out of the oven...

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I burned 2000 calories today.

Last time I take a nap with brownies in the oven.

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How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?

Put it in the oven until its bill withers.

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My favorite stupid joke to this day. I heard it when I was a young kid.

Two muffins were in an oven, the first muffin turns to the other and says "man it sure is hot in here!" The second muffin replies "Holy fuck!!!! A talking muffin!!!!!"

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A dad puts a deer in the oven and doesn't tell the children what they're having

Dad: We're having what Mum calls me
Kid: DONT EAT IT ITS A FUCKING DICK

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I burned 1000 calories today...

Forgot I had a pizza in the oven.

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I always feel bad for the kids in africa when I waste water..

And when I leave the oven on, I feel bad for the jews.

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Grandma's Apple Pie

An old man is dying, with his young grandson by his bedside. He asks his grandson to lean over and whispers "Johnny, I smell your grandma's apple pie. Looks like she took it of the oven. Go to the kitchen and bring me a piece. It's my favorite."

Johnny gets up and leaves. 2 minutes later he comes back empty handed and says "Sorry, grandpa, but grandma says its for after the funeral."

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Never have unprotected sex with a cannibal.

Or next thing you know, you'll have a baby in the oven.

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Just burned 2,000 calories

That's the last time I leave cookies in the oven while I nap.

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If farting under the covers is a Dutch oven...

is doing it in the shower a German oven?

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I can't cook. My strategy for operating the oven is basically the same as my strategy for sex

I do my best to turn it on, then I stick my stuff in and hope for the best.

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What Does A Chinese Man Need When Taking his Dog Out?

Oven mitts.

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I just burned 2000 calories.

That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.

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The bread I made came out the oven shaped like a voluptuous womans butt!

I tried not to let it turn me on, but dat ass dough!

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Burnt 1,800 calories today!

Forgot the Pizza in the oven.

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Just burned 2000 calories while in bed.

That's the last time I take a nap while the brownies are in the oven.

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I have this stupid obsession to check whether the oven is on and that the doors are locked.

I really hate my job at the crematorium.

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Post your most offensive joke? Sure.

Whats the worst part about being a black jew? Having to sit in the back of the oven :D

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Two Muffins In An Oven

Two muffins are in an oven

One muffin says to the other muffin
"Man it's hot in here."

The other muffin replies
"Holy shit, a talking muffin... I must be baked."

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Two muffins are in an oven together....

One turns to the other and says, Man, it's hot in here . The other muffin turns any yells, Holy shit! A talking muffin!

Yes, I'm a dad.

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How do you make a duck into a soul singer?

Put it in the oven at ~~three fifty~~ tree fiddy until it's Bill Withers.

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My wife got angry when I said "Samsung"...

Apparently that was the wrong answer to: "What oven should I buy to match my cooking style?"

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Why are black jews the worst off race?

They have to sit at the back of the oven.

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You know what the worst part of being black and Jewish is?

I have to sit in the back of the oven.

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What does Snoop Lion do when he forgets to wear oven mitts?

Drops it like it's hot.

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I kept my wife at home in the kitchen all day today, baking

I hope the police don't look in the oven

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What's the hardest part about cooking a vegetable?

Fitting the wheelchair in the oven.

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Two muffins are in an oven

One turns to the other and says, boy, it sure is hot in here!

The other muffin replies, Ahhhhh a talking muffin!!!!!

(I'm terrible at jokes and this is the only one that I consistently don't f*k up and my husband actually laughs when I tell it.)

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What are the most funny Oven jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Oven? Well, here are the best Oven dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Oven pick up lines to share with friends.

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