Outstanding Jokes
146 outstanding jokes and hilarious outstanding puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about outstanding that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Outstanding Short Jokes
Short outstanding jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The outstanding humour may include short excellent jokes also.
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
The job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in his jeans. - Experts say Donald Trump been setting an outstanding example during the Covid-19 outbreak 28 consecutive press briefings spent washing his hands
- I'm really good at managing my credit card. My bank keeps sending me letters saying my account is outstanding.
- I was at the bank going to withdraw money from my account when the clerk told me I had an outstanding balance I told her thank you I did gymnastics as a kid.
- I'm not one to brag about my financial skills, but my credit card company calls me almost every day to tell me my balance is outstanding.
- I'm so good with managing money I got a letter from a debt collector saying 'outstanding payment'
- I don't understand why my credit score is so low. Every time collectors call, they say my payments have been outstanding.
- I can't understand why my credit card keeps getting declined Every time I log into my account online it says I have an outstanding balance.
- Have you guys heard about the scarecrow... Have you guys heard about the scarecrow that got a nobel prize for being outstanding in his field?
- The bank called today to let me know I had an overdraft balance that was still outstanding I said thanks, that's really nice of you to say so
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Outstanding One Liners
Which outstanding one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with outstanding? I can suggest the ones about remarkable and incredible.
- Why did the cow get an award? For being outstanding in his field.
Sorry. - What do you call a scarecrow who's really good at his job? Outstanding in his field.
- Just moved out on my own and am doing really well... All my bills say im outstanding
- Why did the spring onion win an award? Because it was outstanding in its field!
- Why don't farmers go to school? Because they're outstanding in their fields.
- The scarecrow won employee of the month again... He's outstanding in his field.
- Have you heard about the record-setting farmer...? He's outstanding in his field
- As a scarecrow, people say I'm outstanding in my field. But hay, it's in my jeans.
- It's not easy being a farmer You have to be outstanding in your field
- What makes the scarecrow so good at his job? He's outstanding in his field
- Never take a cows job for granted: It's outstanding in its field.
- Why did the gymnast's account get sent to collections? She had an outstanding balance.
- I'm going to stand outside. So if anyone asks, I'm outstanding.
- I used to know a very professional scarecrow He was outstanding in his field.
- I wish I was a Farmer So I could be outstanding in my field.
Award Outstanding Jokes
Here is a list of funny award outstanding jokes and even better award outstanding puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- A local farmer just received an award from the city. It was for being outstanding in his field.
- Why did the farmer get nominated for an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
Why didn't the farmer make it to the award ceremony?
Because he was out standing in his field. - Did you guys hear about the award winning farmer? Apparently he was outstanding in his field. [modified repost]
- How did the scarecrow earn an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
Yes i stole it but i tought i'd share it...also i don't know if this was posted before.Pls no hate. - Person of the year award has been won by a scarecrow the judges said he was outstanding in his field.
- My uncle is a farmer. Last year he won an award for outstanding in his field.
Ridiculous Outstanding Jokes to Spark Fun and Laughter
What funny jokes about outstanding you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean phenomenal jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make outstanding pranks.
Two elderly couples were enjoying friendly conversation when one of the men asked the other, "Fred, how was the memory clinic you went to last month?"
"Outstanding," Fred replied.
"They taught us all the latest psychological techniques, visualization, association,it made a huge difference for me."
"That's great! What was the name of the clinic?"
Fred went blank He thought and thought, but couldn't remember.
Then a smile broke across his face and he asked, "What do you call that flower with the long stem and thorns?"
"You mean a rose?"
"Yes, that's it!"
He turned to his wife, "Rose, what was the name of that clinic?"
How come the village Guy Fawkes won the Nobel Peace Prize?
Cause he was outstanding in his field.
Pritam is driving down the Delhi-Amritsar highway when he spots his friend Shankar standing in the middle of a huge field of grass.
He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that Shankar is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing.
Pritam gets out of the car, walks all the way out to Shankar and asks him, "Excuse me, what are you doing?"
Shankar replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize."
"How?" asks Pritam, puzzled.
"Well, I heard they give the Noble Prize to people who are outstanding in their field."
What did the dentist said to the Sabretooth tiger? You have outstanding teeth.
You see those cows over there?
They are outstanding in their field.
I love my credit card company...
they call me every day to tell me my balance is outstanding!
Career Change
A gynaecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and
paperwork, and was burned out. Hoping to try another career where skill-ful hands would be beneficial, he decided to become a mechanic.
He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes,
attended diligently, and learned all he could.
When the time of the practical exam approached, the gynaecologist
prepared carefully for weeks, and completed the exam with tremendous skill.
When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had
obtained a score of 150%.
Fearing an error, he called the Instructor, saying, "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade?"
"The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart
perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You then put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark."
After a pause, the instructor added, "I gave you an extra 50% because you did it all through the exhaust, which I've never seen done in my entire career".
What is the definition of a farmer?
Someone who is outstanding in his field.
*hehehe*
Cr
I'm pretty great with money.
Folks keep calling me and telling me my accounts are outstanding.
I was so excited when all my teachers called my work outstanding
I haven't even handed it in yet!
Why do cows always get the best jobs?
Because they're outstanding in their fields.
Confucius say: Man who is outstanding in rain dance will be out standing in rain.
What's another term for a prodigal farmer?
Someone who is outstanding in his field.
So a man gets a job working as a highway stripe painter
The foreman gives the guy a paint brush and a fat bucket of paint and tells the dood where to paint and off the guy goes.
End of the first day the newbie comes back and tells the foreman he did 10 miles. "Outstanding!" The foreman says.
Second day newbie comes back to the shop at the end of the day and tells the foreman he's done 4 miles. 'Not impressive.' The foreman thinks.
End of the third day the newbie tells his foreman he did one mile. The foreman has to ask, "The first day you did 10 miles, the second day you did 4, and today you only accomplished one measly mile? What gives?"
"Well," The newbie says, "Every day the paint can gets farther and farther away.
Farming for a Nobel Prize
Farmer John is driving along the road one day when he spots his neighbour, Bill, standing on top of his tractor in the middle of his field. Overcome with curiosity, he ambles over and asks Bill what he is up to?
Bill replies, "Trying to win a Nobel prize".
"How do you figure?"
"Well, I hear they give them to people who are outstanding in their fields!"
Have you heard about Betty the cow?
She's outstanding in her field.
Why was the professional so impressed with the farmer?
Why was the professional so impressed with the farmer?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
You know what they say about Anthropologists
They are all outstanding in their field.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Woman greets mailman at her mailbox, invites him in, they make passionate love, then she makes him a lunch fit for a king and then hands him a $1 bill.
Flabbergasted mailman says: "My goodness that was outstanding, wonderful, thank you, I really appreciate it. May I ask why you did all this for me?"
Woman says: "I told my husband you were retiring and suggested we do something for you and he said "screw the mailman, give him a dollar", the lunch was my idea."
Nobel Prize winners are a lot like farmers
Oftentimes they are outstanding in their field.
There was a competition in the park today, who could go the longest without sitting or laying down.
I was outstanding.
Farmers are outstanding in their field because...
they can raise things without lifting them
I keep getting calls telling me that I have outstanding bills...
...and while I appreciate the compliment, they're really nothing special.
Did you hear about the kid who was outstanding at school?
He came in when it started to rain.
Why do Scarecrows Make Great Rocket Scientists?
...because they're out-standing in their field!
My credit card company is super nice, they really help boost my self esteem...
They always tell me I have an outstanding balance!
Bill collector tells me my debt is outstanding
I thank him for noticing how much hard work I put into collecting them.
My bank is really proud of me.
They keep calling to tell me I have an outstanding balance.
When I first got my student loans, I thought they were great.
Now, they're outstanding!
Did you hear about that poor gymnast's bank account?
Her balance was outstanding.
I think my bank is trying to get me to become a gymnast.
They keep sending me letters about my outstanding balance.
Someone from the bank keeps calling to tell me that my overdraft balance is still outstanding
I don't answer anymore, I hate flattery.
How do you compliment a scarecrow?
Tell him he's outstanding in his field!
So a friend of mine just won farmer of the year...
It was a real honor as they were the most outstanding in their field.
What did the gymnast and the grad student have in common?
The both had an outstanding balance.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Do you know the most outstanding thing about our i**... immigrants?
Their warrants.
(Here come the down-votes!)
This joke is about a word that can mean both 'excellent' and 'overdue'!
It's outstanding.
Why are cows so famous?
Because they're outstanding in their field.
(Probably been posted before but heard it for the first time today)
I'll have you know I'm in a great financial situation.
Even my credit card company says my balance is outstanding!
The professor of agriculture was a scarecrow
He was outstanding in his field.
Why are scarecrows so special?
They are outstanding in their field.
"Sir, your balance is outstanding."
I know my balance is outstanding, I've been skateboarding for years, but I fail to see how that's going to help me pay back this debt!
So it turns out I have a great balance on my credit card...
....you know how I know? I logged in to my account and it said outstanding balance.
So I went to this concert with my wife
And I recognized one of the violin players from my highschool marching band. He played fine, but not outstanding. My wife also recognized him. So after the concert we decided to say hi.
"Has anyone told you that you were the best violin player in the world?"
My friend was quite surprised from my wife's comment and also quite pleased. But before he could reply my wife continued.
"Ever wonder why?"
I rode my unicycle to the bank today. They told me I have outstanding balance.
I'm not exactly sure how to take it.
Friend told me about a song taking place in soviet Russia. Chicken farmer with outstanding yield had to give up his chickens due to collective farming law...
Can't keep my hens to myself
Got a letter from the tax office saying my tax was outstanding.
Which was a nice surprise, because I don't even remember doing it.
Why did the bill collector go after the gymnast?
Because he had outstanding balance
"Therefor People, outstanding...
In the rain."
Great news, my boss said I have an outstanding report!
Funny, thing is I don't remember doing one.
3 men died and were taken to God....
They were taken to the top of a cliff . GOD SAID to them that since they had been such outstanding citizens on Earth that they'd be given one chance to become anything they desired.
The first man ran to the edge of the cliff, jumped into the air and shouted."i want to be an eagle". Instantly he was changed into an eagle and soared off into the sunset.
The second man ran to the edge of the cliff, jumped into the air and shouted "I want to be an owl." Instantly he was changed into an owl and soared of into the sunset.
The third man ran towards the edge of the cliff, tripped on a rock and shout " Oh, sh*t"....
My teacher was outstanding
Before she entered the class that is .
How can you tell if a cow is successful?
When it's outstanding in its field.
Everyone wishes their credit score was like their payments.
Outstanding.
What did the Loan Officer say to the Tightrope Walker after he gave him a loan?
You have an outstanding balance
My girlfriend said she had a surprise for me. . .
She pulled me aside and told me that she got a letter from the bank and that our balance was outstanding.
Told my secretary I was going to the patio for a break.
She replied "If anyone calls, I'll tell them you're outstanding."
I love my secretary. My wife, not so much.
TIL a farmer won a Nobel Prize!
He was outstanding in his field.
