The Best 53 Outfit Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Outfit jokes. There are some outfit apparel jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these outfit mask puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Outfit Jokes and Puns

My friend had this really fancy business meeting...

He had this special outfit prepared, but he needed it to be properly fitted, to look nice. I offered to do it but he said he could do it himself

"Fine," I said...

"Suit yourself"

I found this new social media channel of a cute girl in revealing outfit that teaches elementary mathematics

Her account is "The THOT that Counts"

Sweet Baby Jokes (philanthropic concept reversal)

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
The trampoline doesn't look awfully cute in a sailor's outfit.

Outfit joke, Sweet Baby Jokes (philanthropic concept reversal)

What do you call the Hulk when he wears Captain America's outfit?

The Star Spangled Banner

Wife spices things up!

A wife, worrying about the state of her marriage, decides to spice things up in the bedroom by adding some costume play. She buys a sexy supergirl outfit and when her husband is in bed slips it on. She walks out, poses seductively and says "Superpussy". Her husband, not looking up from his crossword says "I'll have the soup thanks".


Shower Sex in Detroit

In a recent survey, people from Detroit have proved to be the most likely to have had sex in the shower.In the survey, carried out for a leading toiletries outfit, 86% of Detroit residents said that they have had, if not enjoyed, sex in the shower. The other 14% said they haven't yet served any time in prison.

So I saw these two guys walking down the street...

So I saw these two guys walking down the street, wearing the exact same outfit, I mean right down to the belt. So I yelled at them,

"Hey faggots, did you plan those outfits or what?"

Yeah they arrested me.

Outfit joke, So I saw these two guys walking down the street...

And then the penguin says to the bartender,

this *is* my most casual outfit!

What happens when a sweatshop gets busted?

The entire outfit is compromised.

Why did the nun swear when she got her new outfit?

It was a bad habit.

If you're wearing a cowboy outfit...

Does that mean you're ranch dressing?

You can explore outfit spandex reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean outfit scarves dad jokes. There are also outfit puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


A bikini is an outfit where 90% of a woman's body is exposed.

The amazing fact is that men are so decent, they only look at the 10% that isn't.

The courier delivered only half of my grizzly outfit today...

So I choked him with my bear hands.

Last week i just robbed my first bank in my new Frog outfit.

I Kermited a major offense

I once met Bruce Willis

I once met Bruce Willis at a fancy dress party. He was wearing a really shabby looking nun outfit. I was told that he'd worn the same costume to every fancy dress party he'd attended for years. I suppose old habits die hard.

Why is women's soccer so rare?

It's quite hard to find enough women willing to wear the same outfit.

Outfit joke, Why is women's soccer so rare?

I thought my new girlfriend might be the one.

But after looking through her knicker drawer and finding a nurse's outfit, a French maids outfit, and a police woman's uniform, I finally decided; if she can't hold down a job, she's not for me.

Today I met a midget in a KKK outfit.

I knew right away he was a little racist.

I saw a midget in a KKK outfit today

I think he is a little racist.


Donald Trump's family bought him a Gandalf the Grey costume for his birthday.

Unfortunately, this wasn't the sort of Grand Wizard outfit he had in mind...

Did you hear about the guy who made an outfit out of super glue?

It was hard to pull off.

What's the most common outfit in WWII?

Casual-tees

I've just bought my wife a slinky outfit

I can't wait to see her going down the stairs.

The reason women don't play football

The reason women don't play football is that eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public.

Why should you wear your nicest outfit if you're going to be attacked by birds?

Because you'll want to be impeccable.

What is proof that Santa is a man?

No woman would ever wear the same outfit every year.

I wonder if Eric Clapton really thought she looked wonderful...

or if it was just the 14th outfit she'd tried on and he didn't want to be late to the party.

My girlfriend is off out to buy a dominatrix outfit on Saturday.

Although she prefers to call it a wedding dress.

A redneck couple gets married and are on their honeymoon.

The woman changes into a sexy outfit and lies on the bed.

She looks sheepishly up at her new hubby and whispers, "Please be gentle with me. I'm a virgin."

The man gets up screaming, grabs his trousers and runs home to tell his father.

His father comforts him by saying, "Now, now. It'll be okay, son. If she wasn't good enough for her own family, then she isn't good enough for ours."

What kind of outfit does a lawyer wear?

A lawsuit

I saw two men wearing the exact same outfit so I asked if they were gay.

They arrested me.

My son in kindergarten had a party a short while ago where we had to dress up as food.....

Everyone was supposed to dress up as a food and parents were also encouraged to come and dress up.

So I decided to go with my son and I put on my cowboy outfit and I went.

There as i was going in a teacher said "Sir, your supposed to be dressed up as a food"

And so I said, " I am. I'm ranch dressing"

I bought a TV from a guy wearing a white outfit and a white cone mask

It was a 3k tv

My wife put on a sexy cop outfit and arrested me on suspicion of being good in bed.

After a short trial, I was found not guilty.

Why was the new lawyer not too fond of his work outfit?

He wasn't comfortable being in a lawsuit yet.

What did they say about the Swordsman's outfit at the Met Gala?

That is was very Avant En Garde.

I went on a date last night and I knew the girl was a little kinky but then she showed me the furry outfit she wanted me to wear...

It gave me paws.

My wife told me to be more spontaneous and funny...

But she was all screaming and tears, when I banged on the kitchen window dressed in a clown outfit!

I'm going to be taking my drivers exam in a full stormtrooper outfit...

That way I won't hit anything.

Why do nuns wear the same outfit every day?

It's a habit.



(I made this one up. I doubt I am the first to do it. )

Why did NASA cancel the all-female spacewalk?

None of them would go outside the rocket wearing the same outfit.

I was challenged to my first fight the other day. I picked out an outfit, showed up and got my ass kicked.

It turned out not to be my strong suit.

A short conversation between a husband and wife:

Wife: "I think this outfit makes me look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"

Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."

Girls be crying over a dude with one outfit...

You should've known he was never gonna change

I saw a guy in a wheelchair wearing a camo outfit

I thought, man you can hide but you can't run.

LPT: An easy way to make money is to take pictures of salmon dressed in a formal outfit.

It's like shooting fish in apparel.

"I really like the outfits my mechanic wears"

"Any particular reason?"

"Nah, just an overall fan"

I remember the time my cousin completely lost it and threw a giant fit at her 12th birthday party. After she changed her outfit she was fine...

It was a post dramatic dress

A lion is drinking from a puddle and his tail is up.

A gorilla walks up behind him, seizes the opportunity and has his way with him.

The gorilla takes off and the lion takes off after him. The gorilla runs into a hunter's camp, jumps into a tent, puts on a safari outfit and a pith helmet, grabs a copy of The Johannesburg Times, sits down and pretends to read.

The lion runs into the camp, sticks his head into the tent and roars, "Arrgg! Did a gorilla come through here?"

The gorilla says, "You mean the one that nailed you from behind?"

The lion says, "You mean it's in the paper already?"

A blonde walks into the Dry Cleaners.

She asks the woman at the counter, " I need to have an outfit washed. Can I have it ready for tonight?"


The clerk is quite busy and slightly distracted. She confusingly looks up from her work and asks, "Come again?"


The blonde replies, "No, it's toothpaste this time."

The nun's old outfit

A nun noticed that the outfit she had worn for twenty years was faded, so she got some plants and chemicals and tried to change the color, but no matter how many times she tried, the color stayed the same.

Old habits dye hard.

Does anyone recall the guy in the superhero outfit at the Capitol on January 6th?

He was on the far right.

My tinder date invited me back to her house tonight, and while she was in the bathroom, I had a cheeky look in her wardrobe. Inside, there was a nurse outfit, a police woman's uniform and a full dominatrix bodysuit, so I quickly pulled on my pants and snuck out of there.

I don't want a girlfriend who can't hold down a job.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the outfit wore jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working outfit attire piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes