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Orphan Jokes

154 orphan jokes and hilarious orphan puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about orphan that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Looking for funny and clever orphan jokes? You've come to the right place! These jokes will have you laughing in no time.

Funniest Orphan Short Jokes

Short orphan jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The orphan humour may include short adopted kid jokes also.

  1. Today I saw a little boy wearing rags sitting on a curb I said, "Awww, are you an orphan"?
    He said, "Yes, what gave me away?"
    I said, "Your parents."
  2. 50s Soviet joke Who is your mother?
    Our great Soviet country.
    Who is your father?
    Our dear comrade Stalin.
    What's your greatest desire?
    Becoming an orphan.
  3. Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him "go big or go home", he only had one option.
  4. I saw a raggedy little boy on the street and asked him if he was an orphan. He said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."
  5. Why are orphans successful? Because its either go big or go home. What choice do they have?
  6. I passed a kid sat on the side of the road dressed in rags earlier. I asked him, "Are you an orphan?"
    He replied, "Yes. What gave me away?"
    I said, "Your parents."
  7. Why couldn't the orphan watch the movie? Because it was PG
  8. - Mom, mom ! My classmates call me an orphan ! -
  9. Why did the orphan turn to a life of crime? To find out what it was like to be Wanted for once in his life.
  10. What is an orphans favorite beer? Fosters

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Orphan One Liners

Which orphan one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with orphan? I can suggest the ones about lonely and widow.

  1. I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately it doesn't have a home page.
  2. Who isn't allowed to watch PG movies? Orphans.
  3. The f in orphan stands for family wait
  4. I have designed a website for orphans there isn't a home page
  5. What a selfie called taken by an orphan? A family photo.
  6. Q: Why can't orphans play baseball? A: Because they don't know where home is.
  7. What did one orphan say to the other? Robin, get in the Batmobile!
  8. Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor? Because it can't hit home
  9. Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is
  10. What is it called when an Orphan takes a selfie ? Family Photo.
  11. Why is it good being an orphan Every bag of chips is family sized
  12. Why don't orphans play hide and seek? Because no one will look for them.
  13. What type of flour do you buy an orphan? Self raising.
  14. I made a website for orphans It doesn't have a home page
  15. How can you tell that a website was made by an orphan? It doesn't have a home page.

Orphan Kid Jokes

Here is a list of funny orphan kid jokes and even better orphan kid puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What did the orphan kid say when he was riding his bike? Look hands, no mum..
  • What does a blind kid and an orphan have in common? Neither can see their parents
  • Hey kid, you're an orphan right? Yes sir, what gave me away?
    Your parents.
  • I've been bullying this kid Good thing hes an orphan. Who's he gonna tell, his parents?
  • When both of a kid's parents die, they are called an orphan. What do you call a kid with one dead parent? Sad.
  • Remember when Anty died in Honey, I Shrunk the Kids? I wonder if he left behind any little orphan anties.
  • What do you call a kid with two gay black dads? An orphan.
  • Orphans are so oblivious. They don't get things that are a parent to other kids.
  • What do you call a kid who ate both his father and mother? ...an orphan
  • What kind of flour do orphan kids use for cooking? Self Raising flour

Orphan Bad Jokes

Here is a list of funny orphan bad jokes and even better orphan bad puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.
  • Why are orphans bad at baseball? Because they can never find home
  • Why are orphans bad at baseball? They have no idea where home is.
  • Why are orphans so bad at poker? They don't understand the term "full house".
  • Friends are like family ...Too bad I'm an orphan.
  • An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying. I said, "Don't worry, your parents won't say anything."
  • Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They've got nowhere to run HOME.

Orphan Christmas Jokes

Here is a list of funny orphan christmas jokes and even better orphan christmas puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What did the crippled orphan baby get on Christmas? Molested
  • Darth Vader: Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas. Luke: How?
    Darth Vader: I felt your presents.
  • What did the orphan get for Christmas? 200 upvotes
  • What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.
    Because he's Jewish.
  • What did the orphan get for Christmas? A family.
  • What does a blind, mentalliy disabled, paralyzed orphan get for christmas? Cancer!
  • What does an orphan, diabled... What does an orphan, disabled, blind kid get to Christmas?
    Cancer

Orphan Selfie Jokes

Here is a list of funny orphan selfie jokes and even better orphan selfie puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What do you call an orphan taking a selfie? Family portrait.
  • What do you call an orphan taking a selfie? A family photo.
    ..... too much??
  • What do you call an orphan taking a selfie? Family photo.
  • Selfies taken by orphans are Family photos
  • What does an orphan call a family photo? Selfie
  • What do you call it when an orphan takes a family photo? A selfie.

Orphan Annie Jokes

Here is a list of funny orphan annie jokes and even better orphan annie puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why is Annie the Orphan crying? There was a solar eclipse.

Laughable Orphan Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles

What funny jokes about orphan you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean homeless jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make orphan pranks.

My wife opened one of her birthday presents early, saying that it was "practically screaming out at her"

That's the last time I buy her an orphan

Why do orphans like tennis?

Only place they can get love

Where do all the orphan chickens end up?

Foster Farms

A man sees a small boy begging for money

He walks up to him and asks him if he is an orphan.
The boy asks "what gave me away?"
The man responds "your parents"

Edited from my mistake earlier today: what do paedophiles and n**... have in common?

They can both s**... a Vietnamese orphan in under 30 seconds.

My ex was orphan as a child

I should have taken that as the first sign.
If her parents didn't want her, why would I.

What does an orphan and a bottle of champagne have in common?

They both lost their pop.

I met a little boy today.

He was sitting on the curb, dressed in rags. He had his face in his hands and it looked like he was crying.
I felt kinda bad he was all alone, so I went and sat down beside him.
I said, "Are you an orphan, little guy?"
As he looked up, his eyes were still red and his cheeks still wet. He managed to crack a small smile.
"Yeah. What gave me away?"
I leaned in close and whispered,
"Your parents."

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile?

"Robin, let's get in the Batmobile."
Bonus joke:
What did one orphan say to the other orphan as they got into their car?
"Robin, let's get in the Batmobile."

What did the orphan poker player say?

Will you raise me?

What do you call a v**... r**...?

An orphan

What's the best part about being an orphan?

All your chips and candy bars are family sized.

My dad used to say, "Marry an orphan...

Then you'll be marrying the whole family."

Why were the orphans thrown out of the restaunt

Because it Was a family restraunt

What do you call a black child with 2 dads?

An Orphan

Why are orphans terrible at baseball?

They've never known what home is.

What do you call an orphan who suffers from horrific parental a**...?

A paradox.

Where did the orphans go after the Orphanage blew up?

Everywhere

What do you call the son of two gay black men?

Orphan

What did one male orphan say to another when they were forced to share a bed?

"No home bro."

Batman, but it's a Japanese action film

Mighty Orphan Power Ranger

A teacher in the Soviet union yells at her student - who's your father?

**Stalin** says the child.
Who's your mother?
**Mother Russia**
What do you want to be when you grow up?
**An orphan!**

If you ever get mad, just punch an orphan

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

When you feel like beating up someone, beat an orphan

What is he going to do? Tell his parents?

Little boy, are you an orphan?

"Yes. What gave me away?" "Your parents"

What do you do when you are bored?

You punch an orphan.
Don't worry, he won't tell his parents.

What's the difference between a baseball player and an orphan?

An orphan doesn't have a home to run to.

Why did most orphans become prostitutes?

Because they wanted a daddy.

For orphans ..

every bag of chips is familly sized

What does a person with Alzheimers and an orphan have in common?

They both don't know their parents

Why is the I phone x the first phone an orphan gets?

Because there is no home button

Why do orphans love boomerangs?

Because they actually come back.

Why do orphans like playing tennis?

It's the only love they'll ever get.

What did one orphan say to the other orphan?

To the Batmobile!

What is the difference between a prince, a bald headed man, a monkey and an orphan?

The first is an heir apparent, the second has no apparent hair, the third has hairy parent and the last has nary a parent.

"What is a cannibal, Johnny?" asked the teacher.

"What is a cannibal, Johnny?" asked the teacher.
"I don't know, sir," replied Johnny.
"Well, what would you be if you ate your mother and father?"
"An orphan, sir."

One man's trash is another man's treasure

Wonderful saying, horrible way of finding out you're an orphan

If you're ever bored

Just go punch an orphan, what is he gonna do? Tell his parents?

Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?

Because they have no Father's or Mother's Day.

A ragged looking teen is begging for food on the street

A guy comes along and buys him a sandwich. He asks the kid, are you an orphan?
The kid replies, yes I am. What gave me away?
The guy says, obviously, your parents

A guy murders his parents.

He is presented in front of a judge and he begs the judge to show mercy while delivering his punishment.
The judge says to him, "You killed your own parents. Why would I show mercy to you?"
The guy looks at the judge and says, "Well, because I am an orphan."

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They don't know where home is.

what do you call a v**... in alabama

an orphan

An orphan went to a bar and ordered a beer.

Can I have a Foster?

What's one thing a homing missile can't kill

An orphan

Why did the blind orphan cross the road alone?

Because he wished to see his parents on the other side.

The definition of chutzpah:

Is the man who killed his parents who asks for mercy from the court.
The judge asks On what grounds should we grant you mercy?
Man On the account of I'm an orphan!
This is a very old one.
#yiddish is fun

My wife and I were walking out of a restaurant with a d**... bag, when we saw a young teen in shabby clothes sitting on the sidewalk

He asked if he could have our leftovers, so I gladly gave them to him.
I asked him if he was an orphan.
He said "Yes I am - what gave me away?"
I replied "Obviously, your parents."

Why don't orphan s play baseball?

Because they don't have a home to run to.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find home.

Teenager is on trial for m**... of both of his parents

Before ready to pass the sentence, Judge asks him: "Do you want to say anything to the court?"
And the young man says "Have mercy your highness! I am just a poor orphan!"

How many orphans does it take to change a light bulb?

Obviously more than three because my basement is still dark.

why was the orphan so succesful?

Because when they said go big or go home, he only had one option

jokes about orphan