The Best 73 Orphan Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Orphan jokes. There are some orphan tantrum jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these orphan adopt puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Orphan Jokes and Puns

Why was the orphan so successful?

When they told him "go big or go home", he only had one option.

Why don't orphans play hide and seek?

Because no one will look for them.

Today I saw a little boy wearing rags sitting on a curb

I said, "Awww, are you an orphan"?
He said, "Yes, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents."

What type of flour do you buy an orphan?

Self raising.

Why couldn't the orphan watch the movie?

Because it was PG

My wife opened one of her birthday presents early, saying that it was "practically screaming out at her"

That's the last time I buy her an orphan

Why do orphans like tennis?

Only place they can get love

Where do all the orphan chickens end up?

Foster Farms

- Mom, mom ! My classmates call me an orphan !


A man sees a small boy begging for money

He walks up to him and asks him if he is an orphan.

The boy asks "what gave me away?"

The man responds "your parents"

Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor?

Because it can't hit home

You can explore orphan adoption reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean orphan orphanage dad jokes. There are also orphan puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Edited from my mistake earlier today: what do paedophiles and napalm have in common?

They can both strip a Vietnamese orphan in under 30 seconds.

My ex was orphan as a child

I should have taken that as the first sign.
If her parents didn't want her, why would I.

I saw a raggedy little boy on the street and asked him if he was an orphan. He said, "What gave me away?"

I said, "Your parents."

What does an orphan and a bottle of champagne have in common?

They both lost their pop.

Why are orphans bad at poker?

Because they don't know what a full house is

I met a little boy today.

He was sitting on the curb, dressed in rags. He had his face in his hands and it looked like he was crying.

I felt kinda bad he was all alone, so I went and sat down beside him.

I said, "Are you an orphan, little guy?"

As he looked up, his eyes were still red and his cheeks still wet. He managed to crack a small smile.

"Yeah. What gave me away?"

I leaned in close and whispered,

"Your parents."

What is an orphans favorite beer?


Why didn't Timmy get his parents Christmas presents?

He's an orphan.

What do pedophile sex-tourists and napalm have in common?

They can both strip a Vietnamese orphan in under a minute.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile?

"Robin, let's get in the Batmobile."

Bonus joke:

What did one orphan say to the other orphan as they got into their car?

"Robin, let's get in the Batmobile."

What did the orphan poker player say?

Will you raise me?

What do you call a virgin redneck?

An orphan

What's the best part about being an orphan?

All your chips and candy bars are family sized.

My dad used to say, "Marry an orphan...

Then you'll be marrying the whole family."

Why were the orphans thrown out of the restaunt

Because it Was a family restraunt

What do you call a black child with 2 dads?

An Orphan

What did one orphan say to the other?

Robin, get in the Batmobile!

Why are orphans bad at baseball?

Because they can never find home

Why are orphans bad at baseball?

They have no idea where home is.

Why are orphans terrible at baseball?

They've never known what home is.

50s Soviet joke

Who is your mother?

Our great Soviet country.

Who is your father?

Our dear comrade Stalin.

What's your greatest desire?

Becoming an orphan.

What do you call an orphan who suffers from horrific parental abuse?

A paradox.

Where did the orphans go after the Orphanage blew up?


Why are orphans so bad at baseball?

They don't know where home is.

What do you call the son of two gay black men?


Why is it good being an orphan

Every bag of chips is family sized

I passed a kid sat on the side of the road dressed in rags earlier.

I asked him, "Are you an orphan?"

He replied, "Yes. What gave me away?"

I said, "Your parents."

Why did the orphan turn to a life of crime?

To find out what it was like to be Wanted for once in his life.

What did one male orphan say to another when they were forced to share a bed?

"No home bro."

Batman, but it's a Japanese action film

Mighty Orphan Power Ranger

A teacher in the Soviet union yells at her student - who's your father?

**Stalin** says the child.

Who's your mother?

**Mother Russia**

What do you want to be when you grow up?

**An orphan!**

If you ever get mad, just punch an orphan

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

When you feel like beating up someone, beat an orphan

What is he going to do? Tell his parents?

What's the difference between a baseball player and an orphan?

An orphan doesn't have a home to run to.

Why did most orphans become prostitutes?

Because they wanted a daddy.

For orphans ..

every bag of chips is familly sized

What does a person with Alzheimers and an orphan have in common?

They both don't know their parents

Why is the I phone x the first phone an orphan gets?

Because there is no home button

Why do orphans love boomerangs?

Because they actually come back.

Why do orphans like playing tennis?

It's the only love they'll ever get.

What did one orphan say to the other orphan?

To the Batmobile!

The f in orphan stands for family


What does a blind kid and an orphan have in common?

Neither can see their parents

What is the difference between a prince, a bald headed man, a monkey and an orphan?

The first is an heir apparent, the second has no apparent hair, the third has hairy parent and the last has nary a parent.

How can you tell that a website was made by an orphan?

It doesn't have a home page.

"What is a cannibal, Johnny?" asked the teacher.

"What is a cannibal, Johnny?" asked the teacher.

"I don't know, sir," replied Johnny.

"Well, what would you be if you ate your mother and father?"

"An orphan, sir."

One man's trash is another man's treasure

Wonderful saying, horrible way of finding out you're an orphan

What a selfie called taken by an orphan?

A family photo.

If you're ever bored

Just go punch an orphan, what is he gonna do? Tell his parents?

What is it called when an Orphan takes a selfie ?

Family Photo.

Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?

Because they have no Father's or Mother's Day.

A ragged looking teen is begging for food on the street

A guy comes along and buys him a sandwich. He asks the kid, are you an orphan?

The kid replies, yes I am. What gave me away?

The guy says, obviously, your parents

A guy murders his parents.

He is presented in front of a judge and he begs the judge to show mercy while delivering his punishment.

The judge says to him, "You killed your own parents. Why would I show mercy to you?"

The guy looks at the judge and says, "Well, because I am an orphan."

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They don't know where home is.

What did the orphan kid say when he was riding his bike?

Look hands, no mum..

What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?

Family portrait.

what do you call a virgin in alabama

an orphan

What does an orphan call a family photo?


An orphan went to a bar and ordered a beer.

Can I have a Foster?

What's one thing a homing missile can't kill

An orphan

Why did the blind orphan cross the road alone?

Because he wished to see his parents on the other side.

The definition of chutzpah:

Is the man who killed his parents who asks for mercy from the court.
The judge asks On what grounds should we grant you mercy?
Man On the account of I'm an orphan!

This is a very old one.
#yiddish is fun

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the orphan rags jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working orphan needy piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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