Orientation Jokes
39 orientation jokes and hilarious orientation puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about orientation that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Are you looking for a laugh? Read our collection of life orientation jokes involving reservations, pineapples, and tribesmen. From the serious to the silly, these jokes are sure to make you giggle!
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Funniest Orientation Short Jokes
Short orientation jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The orientation humour may include short oriented jokes also.
- To the guy with the friend who dates Asians.... Maybe he just needs some time to re-orient himself?
- What happens if you spin an oriental person around really fast for an extended period of time? They become disoriented.
- I heard a rumour that Cadbury is bringing out an oriental chocolate bar. Could be a Chinese Wispa.
- The Orientation for my new job at the Mattress Store was today. The Manager handed me a King-sized Blanket and said, "Well, I think that covers just about everything here."
- What do you call a programming language designed for women? An object oriented programming language.
- If I ever become a DJ, my name will be DJ Oriental Immigrant Because I lay down sick tracks
- I don't understand why women programmers are mad when male programmers objectify their body.... After all, it is object oriented programming.
- So I released a new cook book in the oriental side of town. It's called *101 ways to wok your dog*
- Apple scraps a new product... I've heard that Apple has scrapped their plans for the new children's-oriented IPod after realizing that "ITouch Kids" is not a good product name.
- Apparently Cadbury's are making an oriental chocolate bar I reckon it's just a Chinese whisper
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Orientation One Liners
Which orientation one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with orientation? I can suggest the ones about aspect and direction.
- How can you tell if an astronaut is gay? You can't. There's no orientation in space.
- Whats the object-oriented way to become wealthy? Inheritance
- What do you call the process of becoming an honorary Asian? Orientation.
- How often does an oriental farmer milk his cows? Dairy
- What do you call an oriental crab? A Crust-Asian
- Girl you are like a fine oriental rug... ...you'd look great on hardwood.
- What happens to a person when they move out of Asia? They become dis-oriented!
- Orientation is a racist term... I prefer Asiantation.
- If you spun an Oriental guy around and round... Would he become _disoriented?_
- Hey girl, are you an object-oriented programming language? Because you've got class.
- Why are programmers so consumeristic? Because they're object oriented.
- What happens when you spin an oriental around? They get disoriented.
- My approach to women is the same as my approach to code Object Oriented
- Did you hear about the battle rapper with vertigo? He was very diss-oriented
- What do you call all the sacked news reporters in China? The orient ex-press
Uproarious Orientation Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What funny jokes about orientation you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean axis jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make orientation pranks.
My daughter asked me today:"Dad, What is s**...?"
I had feared this moment would come and didn't think it would come this soon but nevertheless I was prepared.
So I sat her down and explained it all. The birds and the bees, the different s**... orientations, all the positions and of course I had to mention all the STD's and the rules of safe s**....
When I finished she looked at me shocked and confused:
"So... which box should I check on this form? Male or Female?"
3 friends die in a car accident and they go to an orientation in heaven...
They are all asked, "When you are in your casket and friends and family are talking about you, what would you like them to say?
The first guy says,"I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time, and a great family man."
The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher which made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow."
The last guy replies, "I would like to hear them say ... Look, He's Moving!
Mother superior is doing the orientation ...
of the new nun. The neighbourhood is rough and so she thought she would put some hypotheticals. "What would you do if you were walking alone at night and got cornered by a man on who demanded to have s**... with you?"
"Well, I would ask him to drop his pants." replied the new nun coolly
Flabbergasted the Mother pressed "And what then?"
"Well, then I would hike up my habit above my knees." replied the nun, still calm.
Aghast at this the Mother could not but ask "And what then?"
"Well, I would start running. I can run a lot faster with my habit hiked up than the man whose trousers are at his ankles."
I was so proud of my son
He's 18 and he got a job sandblasting for the summer to save for school. The manager was talking to him during safety orientation and said so sandblasting? That should be fun . He responded yeah it should be a blast He said he got a groan and an eye roll then told me off for being contagious.
As a result of the ongoing pandemic, my s**... orientation has changed.
I am now homesexual.
What is the s**... orientation of a guy who is about to get castrated?
Bye-s**...
Missed Orientation Class of Fight Club
Was late to my first Fight Club last night so missed the intro rules. Still, Fight Club was brilliant and I'd highly recommend Fight Club.
Not mine and could be old but this will not age
What's the s**... orientation of people who can no longer perform s**...?
Bye-s**....
True story told by a friend: My nephew was gay and everyone knew it but he was slow coming out of the closet. One day, home from college, he was having breakfast and blurted out, "Mom - I'm gay."
She replied, "Does this mean that you sometimes put other men's p**... in your mouth?" Her son thought that this was an odd response but answered, "Yes." "Then I never want you to complain about my cooking again." (It was her hilarious way of saying that his orientation is not an issue for her.)
It's the first day of high school...
...and the principal is giving an orientation to the freshmen class. He says "Welcome to high school! We have a few rules we must go over. First, men will use the men's locker room, and women will use the women's locker room. If anyone is caught in the other gender's locker room, it is a $20 dollar fine for a first offense, $30 for a second offense, $40 for a third, and so on. Any questions?"
A kid in the back stands up and asks "How much for a season pass?"
I'm questioning my s**... orientation.
I can't think straight.
Went to my first fight club last night
I got there a bit late so I missed the orientation but wow it was amazing. If anyone wants more information, let me know!
\- credit to my friend Brian who popped this one off last night. He's not a very original sort so I'm sure he stole it from somewhere.
